Any Advice on How to Do a Half-Birthday?

First of all this is not a personal criticism, but the idea of making a date to celebrate a half birthday just for the kind of presents they'll receive seems to be sending a message of materialism. Everyone gets one birthday, your child and perhaps future children you do this with will automatically think they're entitled to things 2 times a year. A precident has been set, what if one year you decide not to do it?

In our current environment, we focus too much on the stuff. I've seen too many birthday parties (my kids are only 6, 4 & 3) where it looks like the parents are trying to one up each other on the size and granduer, they want the perfect invitations, the right place, the right decorations and the list goes on and on. I can't understand it. Likely more than half of the gifts received are played with for a few days and then left forgotten and unwanted not to mention the amount of paper, plastic and food that goes into the garbage after a party.

I would recommend thinking of ways to communicate to your child that they are special and celebrate THEM, not the gifts. On her birthday, fill her room with balloons (just the regular mouth-blown is fine) so that her bedroom floor is filled with balloons when she wakes up. Tell her how glad you are that she was born. Bring out the baby book and show her pictures of when she was a baby.

Here are some other thoughts:
Consider doing birthday parties on milestone birthdays, 1, 5, 10. One of my girlfriends does this. Another family I knew from my son's preschool didn't go to birthday parties. I assume they celebrated within their own family of course, but their kids don't attend other children's parties. Three kids, if each has 5 friends that's 15 parties and 15 gifts. You see it's a slippery slope, once you invite people to a party, they come & give a gift, you will feel obligated to go their party and give gifts. If you feel it is necessary to have a party consider asking guests to NOT bring a gift. I recently read this message on an invitation, "No gifts please, your attendance is gift enough."

Sorry to get on a soap box.

K.

Mother of 3

1 mom found this helpful

My daughter is 13 and her birthday is 12/27. We thought about the half birthday thing but it just doesn't seem the same.

We always have her party on her birthday. You'd be amazed at how many people do come. I think a lot of parents are ready to get the kiddos out of the house for a while a couple days after Christmas!!

I have a separate area set up with bday gifts for her. I also make sure all of her bday gifts are in bday paper. When she was younger and had parties I would leave out one or two gifts she liked and then stash the rest. I would pull out new toys, etc closer to summmer for her. She got nice treats through the summer!

My daughter has a friend with a bday on 12/24 and she usually has her parties in early Dec.

Hope that helps!

1 mom found this helpful

We used to do this for my son every year. We always did family party on his Dec birthday, and his friends in June. It worked great for us, and yes, we sang Happy Birthday, had a cake, etc. Just as if it was his actual birthday.

Hi
My son's birthday is December 19th which is really close to Christmas also. We always do a 1/2 birthday now he is older in school we try to make it right before school gets out because so many people start going to places when school is out. While he was younger we just did the 1/2 birthday in June. On his birthday in Dec. I bought him one small gift sometimes a stuffed animal, remote control car or something and a small cake with just immediate family. The 1/2 birthday invites all his friends we went to the Ranger game last year for it he is 12 now. We have done skating, chuck-e-cheese. Parties @ the house when we had a pool they have always worked out good for us expect the skating but we waited til June and I think he was 11 then and alot of kids had gone to grandma's or camps or stuff. Other than that it has always been a success.
Hope this helps

I am a thirty-something year old woman who grew up celebrating half birthdays. My birthday is in January, so basically, Christmas immediately followed by my birthday and then that was it for the year. So, my mom started celebrating my half birthday in July. She still calls and sends a card (usually with a small Starbucks gift card) to this day!

I have such wonderful memories as a result, so I think it's a great idea. However, on my half birthday we only had a small, immediate family celebration with a one small gift and dessert. It wasn't a big thing, but it still was a special day.

I think my mom got the half birthday idea from Alice in Wonderland - supposedly an "unbirthday" is the same as a half birthday.

Just wanted to share the perspective of someone who grew up celebrating half birthdays! :)

I have 17 yo daughter whose birthday is Dec. 21. She frequently has held a summertime birthday party in June. We just send out invitations and hold it just like a regular party. Her friends' parents are grateful not to have to fuss about it during the busy holidays.

Now that she is older, she'll hold a summertime party, but sometimes still invite friends over for food/karaoke/games on her real birthday. No presents for the informal get-together, just fun.

hey! I have a couple of my daughter friends that she goes to school with birthday's in Dec.they always celebrate in the spring.. maybe have like cake on her b-day then have it at a later date...
hope this helps!

T.

We celebrate 1/2 birthdays but don't make it a huge thing. Our daughter also has a birthday at Christmas time, so each 1/2 birthday she gets a gift from us (has ranged from small to big) and sometimes from grandparents. (We now do the same with our son.) We don't do a cake or anything, but we still talk that day about, "Now you're 3.5" or whatever. I know one idea I read about was a 1/2 cake which I thought was pretty cute. I think as she gets older I may give her the choice of a party on her real or her 1/2 birthday but we don't plan to do parties for both.

My birthday is on the 27th of December and I don't remember ever feeling like I was missing out on anything.

I tend to agree with Kathe on this subject, that celebrating the 1/2 birthday may send the wrong message to children about materialism and unfair expectations. A birthday is a birthday & kids will do fine even if they don't get to take cupcakes to school on their special day. I think we try to please our children too much & end up spoiling them & creating expectations that they deserve more than they really do. Do some special things on their real birthday; it will be more than adequate & you won't run the risk of giving too much.

Our 27 year old was born on Christmas Day, so we've attempted a tradition of a half birthday. Although I'd like to be, our family is not really big on celebrating birthdays. My husband grew up with a large family without money. In their family, birthdays were not generally celebrated. In my family, I have a brother who was born the day before my 3rd birthday, so the big birthday bash never really happened.

No one outside our immediate family really acknowledges the half birthday, but over the years, it has been a big deal for our daughter. It gives her a day of the year to promote as her celebration day. She still announces every year that her half birthday is coming up.

We didn't do the birthday bash thing every year when our kids were growing up. We did however do a few special parties for each of them over the years. One was at a roller rink. One was at a pizza place. We had several sleepover parties. We had family trips to the zoo. Family camping trip with a special friend invited to join us for the weekend.

Although I can understand Kathe's sentiment about the high cost of birthday gift giving, I totally distain the "No gifts please" idea. I can remember having one party when I was about 8 or 10 and my mom made me write that on my invitations. Today she doesn't remember that. I thought (and still think) it was totally cheap of her and disrespectful of me. Gifts don't have to be expensive and they can be handmade or found items. Luckily, most of my friends' parents didn't pay any attention and did send a gift along. My birthday was at the end of August, so usually my family presents were school clothes and a lunchbox.

Our family has always had difficulty celebrating our lives, so as I get older, I embrace opportunities to turn an event into a celebration.

My son's birthday is on 12/27. Since most of his friends are out of town for Xmas break, we just do a small family party on his real b-day with cake and a very few presents, so as not to take away from his 'actual day'.

Then we have a party with his friends a month later, 1/27, when everyone is back to school. He looks forward to this and it's not too far away from his real b-day, where he feels he has to wait until the summer to have a party.

I also give him a small cupcake and take him to Chuck E. Cheese on his half-birthday and gives me an excuse to give him summer clothes or such, since otherwise I don't buy things for the kids unless they are in real need of something. I don't ask others to give him a 1/2 b-day present.

~H.
(mom to 3 kids - 12yo girl, 10 & 4 yr old boys)

Hi E.,
In our family we have a tradition called "Name Day" which falls exactly six months from the true birthday. Name Day is just family and very close friends. The gifts on Name Day are very simple and sometimes goofy. It isn't to get more presents and spend more money on stuff! We don't have a birthday cake but instead eat whatever the Name Day person wishes to have (if they're tiny - their favorite food group). We keep it very simple in all aspects from invitees, to food, to gifts. The whole idea is that each person gets recognized twice a year just for them. Name Day can be fun in that we look up origins of their names, etc. But, most of all it is about them and how much we are blessed to have them in our family/friends group. We let them tell us stories of the past if older relatives, or to tell us of their wishes and dreams if tweens to twenties, and/or just sit and color if they are very, very young. No matter what we do it is directed by the Name Day honoree.
Don't make it a second "birthday" day as that's not good. Make it a separate celebration just for them but not one where expensive gifts, restaurants, etc. become expected. We've done this since 1986 and we just love the tradition and the closeness and knowledge of one another that it brings.

Good luck, B. S.

We had this very issue with my son, and when he turned ten years old, he wanted very much to have a baseball party. I told him that we could not hit his friends up twice in one year for a birthday party, so he had to forego a celebration on his real birthday, but then we picked a time during the summer to celebrate his half year birthday. Invitations were to celebrate his 10 and 1/2 year birthday, and we were able to have his ideal birthday party at a park where they played baseball, then went for a dip in the swimming pool, and then had a picnic complete with grilled footlong hotdogs at the park. He celebrated every summer thereafter on a date of his choice approximately around the half year mark for his birthday. He loved everything outdoors, so we could always count on the weather to cooperate. And here is the best part. He always received an infusion of new toys and games at a time other than Christmas when he already had lots of new goodies and at a time when the friends were ready for yet another party and reason to get together.

I definitely recommend letting your daughter have a special brithday celebration separate and apart from the holiday festivities. And you will be more relaxed and able to have fun with her.

Yes, my son's birthday is the 22nd of December so we plan his party around June 22nd. On his actual birthday I make a cake and he gets one present. My parents usually come over and that is about it. At his birthday party we invite all our friends and family to a party. I do word it on his invitation that it is his 1/2 birthday. It is just like my daughter's birthday (on Valentine's day) we celebrate with just us on her birthday and her party is usually on the weekend. His is just a few more weekends away. I told my husband when he gets older he can decide what he wants to do, but right now this works well. We sing Happy Birthday and everything.

Hi E....my son was born *on* Christmas morning in 2000. Ever since he was old enough to understand, we've done a 1/2 bday. I didn't start it until he was probably 4 yrs. old, though. We always acknowledge his 12/25 birthday w/ cake, candles and a song. My husband's family has chosen to always give him presents on his real 12/25 bday; my family gives him bday gifts on his half bday 12/25. We do a party w/ friends on or around 6/25. I always put in the invitations some kind of explanation "Jared's actual birthday is 12/25, so we have our party on his half bday." All moms understand! It's very fun, and he gets presents twice a year; however, bday presents at Christmas tend to not be remembered as *birthday* gifts. They kind of get mixed in. This has really worked well for us...kind of making lemonade out of lemons :) God bless you in making a special celebration for your Christmas baby.
LHB

E. J
I have a daughter that was born 12/22. Her 1st birthday was a 1/2 birthday, but since then, I just plan on having her birthday early December to separate it from Christmas. But, on the other hand, I do know of a mother who had twin boys on 12/25 and she has 1/2 birthdays and the boys love it. It is usually at the end of school or early summer, and they throw a usual pool or other outside party. Either way, a long as the event is meant to support the birthday, you should be ok, and your daughter will feel special.
L. C

Hi,

My daughter's birthday is in July. As such, she doesn't get to bring cupcakes to school for her birthday or gets lumped into a big crowd of summer birthdays. So, in January, I always take cupcakes or some special treat to her class to celebrate her 1/2 birthday.

I think 1/2 birthdays are a great idea for people born in December. It can be just too much on a mother to be trying to get ready for the Holidays and to celebrate their child's special day. Plus many people won't be able to attend because of other festivities, being out-of-town etc... I think 1/2 birthdays for friends and then a regular small affair with just family on their actual birthday is perfectly acceptable.

You might try going to familyfun.com. I think they had some ideas for 1/2 birthdays in one of their issues.

My sister did something similar with one of her daughters, who's birthday is in early March. My neice wanted to have swim parties as she got older, so my sister did a family dinner on her birthday and let her have a party with her friends in June after school was out. So it combined her birthday and "out of school" celebration.

My son's b-day is 12/24. We usually have a b-day party in January, after school starts back up. On a couple of occasions we have given him a present for his half-birthday--for instance, a bike on June 24. I wouldn't feel comfortable asking kids to bring presents for a half-birthday party, unless you didn't have a real birthday party.
There is an episode of Arthur on PBS about a half-birthday, and I think all the kids brought half a gift...

I have done this for both my girls for the same reasons you are stating. I do it exactly like I would any other birthday party except on the invitation there is 1/2 after the age, and to be cute I make one and 1/2 cakes. We invite friends and sing happy birthday and the whole works.
On their real birthday we DO NOT do presents or a party because that would defeat the point. As an immediate family we do a special dinner and desert - kids choice!

M.

We did this for my son who also has a late December birthday. A clever friend made up a cute poem to go on the invitation to somewhat explain the situation. We also combined the party with his brother's birthday which made it a little easier. The first year is the most difficult. Now most of his friend don't even know his birthday is in December.
We still have a small family gathering on his actual birthday and his grandparents refuse to give gifts on his half birthday.