Answer the Phone!

Updated on March 08, 2011
B.L. asks from Glade Spring, VA
16 answers

At what age do most kids begin making phone calls to friends and receiving them? What kind of guidelines do you have for when they are on the phone? My 9 1/2 yo asked the other day if he could call his "girlfriend" which got me to thinking about this.
Thanks, everyone!

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L.M.

answers from New York on

My daughters started using the phone when they were 2 to call relatives (aunt and grandparents). I think they started calling friends around age 5 or 6. Since they didn't have much to talk about with friends at that age, I really didn't need to set any rules as with time limits.

As they got older, the only restriction I set, which was the same as with their friends, no calls before 9:00am or after 8:00pm.

2 moms found this helpful
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M.B.

answers from Sacramento on

SD was 12 and it was usually about school homework.
They didn't seem to have too much to talk about yet since
they had just seen each other at school.
It was quite funny and interesting .

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

I don't think we had any rule. We taught them early on HOW to answer the phone and they couldn't just take the phone to their rooms and loose it. I'm pretty sure that by 9 they were making phone calls. Oh, and calls had to be at reasonable times. They couldn't talk past bedtime or before a reasonable hour in the AM.

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

My 8yo has been calling family since 2ish, friends since 7ish, and has had his own phone for a couple years now.

We have very few rules about the phone; ask before phoning & wrap it up when asked.

I'm sure we'll need more depth later on, but for now, it's all that's needed (aside from common courtesy; don't text/play games/ call someone else while talking to another person, phone on vibrate in restaurants and other private places, don't call or answer the phone (unless it's and emergency) in such private places, as well as shops, others' homes, etc. but instead excuse yourself and walk somewhere you won't be overheard/ annoying others with your personal business. etc. etc. etc.)

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K.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

My 8yr old gets calls from her friend across the street, but it's only to ask if they can play. My 10yr old gets calls from friends where she goes to her room and closes the door and I hear giggling and laughing. My 13yr old hates talking on the phone and won't even answer it. I remember talking to friends on the phone in 6th grade, I was 10 at the time, so I think my 10yr old daughter is pretty normal in that way...As long as homework is done, chores are done, there's absolutely NOTHING else they need to do, they can talk on the phone as part of their free-time activities in our household.

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C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

We've been allowing our children to answer the phone since they were five (5) years old. They've been talking on it way before that.

They answer it like this: Hello. And our last name. Sometimes they answer: Hello. This is Nick. or if Greg answers - Hello. This is Greg.

They find out who is calling and if it's their grandparents or aunt/uncle - they make a fuss and then tell us! :)

They know how to dial 911. They know what to say in case of an emergency. they know our address and our first names (instead of just mommy and daddy) and our cell numbers as well as our home number.

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

.

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K.L.

answers from Washington DC on

I can remember calling friends when I was in elementary school to see if they wanted to play or to ask about sleepovers, etc but we didn't really talk for L. periods of time....that probably started in 6th grade or so.

I don't see any problem with them making phone calls but I certainly wouldn't be getting him his own cell phone at that age. Times are very different now from when I was a kid (and I'm only 29). Most people don't have home phones anymore, so that has to be taken into consideration.

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A.B.

answers from New York on

No actual; rules. But my son calls me or my hubs if he is with other family memebers, to check in. And upon occassion a friend calls him or he calls them, farely rare. I guess if the calls were more common if I don't have unlimited minutes I'd put a time limit on the chatting, that's about it.

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M.M.

answers from Washington DC on

In my house that's a little young.
My 15 yo has a phone but is never on it. My 13 yo uses her yahoo account to email her two really close girlfriends who live across the country and my 10 yo hasn't yet asked me to use it at all.
It may be because I hate the phone and complain when it rings. We also screen calls.

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C.B.

answers from Boston on

My 14 year old has her own cell and texts, never calls. Once a week I scan through her texts and we have had conversations about never texting or emailing something you would not say to someone in person, or that you would not want grandma to read. She also uses Skype video calling on the computer to connect with friends, especially handy for school projects with teams because they do not actually have to be in 1 place. We gave the 10 year old a cell phone too, but she just texts me when she is on the bus home so I know where she (I work and am home about half an hour after the kids).

1 mom found this helpful
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W.M.

answers from Nashville on

I don't think boys should be calling girls especially younger than 14 or so. My son is 7 1/2 and just got his first call from a friend the other day. They talked about 5 mins and hung up. I was not allowed to talk to boys on the phone until 15 but that was YEARS ago. ha ha My kids don't call friends on the phone but I know kids that do. I have taught my kids not to answer the phone unless it is their father or myself b/c I may not want to talk to whoever calls, ie telemarketers.

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S.L.

answers from Lexington on

while I have to admit that I was raised in a different era, I was taught that you do not call before 9 AM or after 9PM - I still am careful about this. I think the age is less important than that the child learn etiquette, ID himself when he calls be polite etc. Perhaps the first couple of times he calls, you might be nearby to hear his side - just as a monitor not necessarily nosy. Frankly, I would be more concerned about the fact that he has girlfriend at 9.5.
Cell phones are a whole different story! and I do not think that a child his age needs to have a cell.

A.G.

answers from Houston on

When school starts the social life begins.

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E.M.

answers from Louisville on

my daughters call their friends all the time they are 3 and 7... i cant believe hes 9.5 and asking to make phone calls!! your lucky!

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J.W.

answers from Lexington on

Like Riley, at 2-ish, one of my kids was phoning family members. I gave her a little booklet with names and numbers, and wrote in red the long distance numbers she had to ask permission before calling. Since she went to a Montessori preschool, the kids were phoning each other by age 5.

But we did not have the girlfriend-boyfriend issue! So your situation is totally different!

My kids didn't really have much in the way of phone privacy until they were older.

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