Another Baby or Not? - Huntington,IN

You have to think about what you are comfortable with. If your children are not well disciplined and you already have anxiety, I would be hesitant to have another in my opinion. I am expecting my 4th (all four are boys) and my children are well behaved for the most part. The issues that are there, are being dealt with as we figure out what works best for those situations but I could not imagine life if it was chaotic because of behavior. There are enough other things to make life chaotic...another child in school, in sports, ill, etc. Trust me, the ill factor and time are both reason I am ready to stop. Every time one gets sick, the rest are not far behind. I REALLY wanted a daughter. I love my sons with my whole heart but since I was a little girl, I've always imagined having both sons AND daughters. I've even pictured what my daughter with my husband would look like, have my Barbies and wedding dress stored, etc. The realization of that not happening now is something that greatly upset me. But I have to do what is best for my family and I know I can't give more than 4 children the same quality of time that I will be able to give the 4, which is already something I work very hard at keeping balanced and it isn't always easy...especially when there ARE behavior issues or illnesses. So, my opinion is you need to think about yourself and what YOU are comfortable with. I do agree with you, being a mom is a blessing and there are going to be so many more wonderful experiences for you to go through as a mom. It doesn't stop just because pregnancy isn't one of the phases anymore. Trust me, I get it. My husband and I are a bit sad knowing this is the last pregnancy...the last "baby phase" but we know we have so much more to look forward to with the children getting older. You will too.

Good luck.

There is always the possibility of grandchildren down the road or an unplanned child may arrive. You could also foster or adopt one.
Happy choices. Enjoy your day.

Initially, I wanted 4......then, I had 2.....oh, Lordy was that a shock to the system. Then, I was diagnosed with cancer, and though I should be able to conceive, I don't know if it's the best idea.

Make a list of pros and cons and do what's best for your family.

Here are a few questions for you:

Will a 3rd child be too far apart in age from his brothers and feel left out?
Will you be able to afford a 3rd child?
What if something happens to one of you?
Will your family vehicle accommodate 3 car seats/booster seats?

With 2 kids 2 and younger in day care last year, we paid almost $20K for a decent, modest facility. When I was laid off, I really stressed.

If your heart is telling you to, discuss it more with your husband and come-up with a game plan. Just because we want to doesn't mean it's in the cards for us. But, like you, I believe my family is not yet complete.

Best wishes.

I you really want another baby like you do I don't think your family will feel quite complete until you have another one. My husband and I have gone through the same thing. We thought we were done when we had our little boy two years after our daughter. Well about a year after our son was born we both felt like we would love to have another child. We are going to start trying after our son turns two in a couple months. I hope we can give them a little brother or sister soon and I think after that our family will feel totally complete. I wish you the best of luck :).

I knew when I was done. There was no doubt at all. If I struggled with the idea of wanting another then I would have another otherwise you will regret it later. It's one of those things that you will absolutely know when you are complete. However in your case you have anxiety & you said your kids are not disciplined the best. That could be a problem, because 3 kids is very busy. Going from 2 to 3 is very chaotic. I had mine very close in age (5,4, & 2) because I hated being pregnant & I knew if I didn't "act" fast I wouldn't have any more. Although I used to be stressed big time (not as much anymore), I have my kids & house in order. My kids know there are boundaries & I am very consistent with disciplining them. If you don't have order in your house then you may want to consider if having a 3rd is right for you & your family.

I feel just like you do - except I have one girl and one boy. And my husband does NOT want another. I don't have any ideas for you, but I think when it comes closer to the time of when you can start trying, you will know.
BTW - I hate the stupid stomach virus too!
Now I just gotta figure out how to convince my husband of another.
Good luck!