Angry Son

i know you didn't mean it to be funny but have you looked into the comment you made, he really could be bipolar or suffering from ODD talk to your doctor or even to the school counselor and see if you can't get him some help. good luck

1 mom found this helpful

I would first talk to his pediatrician about this then maybe try behaviorial therapy. If that does not work, maybe he is truly bipolar and needs medication. I have had students that were truly bipolar as young as 5 years old and medication helped immensely. I am not an advocate of medication first, but if it helps and he is a happier child for it, then so be it.

This is not going to sound like much help, but I have a soon to be 18 year old son that your son sounds just like. I have 6 kids.To say Joe was stronge willed was an understatment. He could be wonderful one min. and ready to rip your head off the next. I have more than a few gray hairs from raising him and trying to understand and help him. Then almost two years ago he was diagnosed a type one diabetic, I have learned to watch his highs and lows and now know that they are directly affected by him having high or low blood sugers. I think he was born with a malfunctioning pancreus that finally stopped working. Just keep an eye on him and if he has had a lot of carbs and he seams out of sorts or if he gets really mean if he hasn't had much to eat. Sorry not much help other than that.

Hi A.,

Your son's speech issues very possibly may be contributing to his anger issues! Although it may not be the only issue, but a contributing factor.

I don't know what kind of problems he's having with his speech, but he may be frustrated by this. Kids @ school are & possibly have been making fun of his peech issues. This can totally destroy his self confidence. We all want to be liked and kids at any age need to feel accepted by their peers.

Is he getting help with his speech problems? At school or private therapy? The school he attends may be able to give special help if needed and available. Check with the teacher/principal.

Check with your local Health Department, there are program for kids with anger issues available in some counties. They may be able to direct you to some one. He definately needs some follow-up with his anger issues otherwise your concerns will come true.

There is help out there for him. Don't delay! The longer it goes on the longer it'll take to steer him in the right direction and build his self confidence.

Good luck to you & your son!

K. :)

could be a variety of things going on, but, check into this site , and , see a child psychiatrist for evaluation.

http://www.med.yale.edu/chldstdy/autism/asdiagnosis.html#...

Good luck!

Have you talked to his Dr. about his personality shifts? If not, it may be a good time to. You may also want to take a close look at his diet. I know when I was a child, I would have these extreme highs/lows and once my mom starting feeding me more organic foods, less junk food (for example, I could have carob but not chocolate), no sodas, etc. it made a huge difference. Some kids are just more sensitive than others. It may also help to keep a diary of his mood swings, eating and sleeping habits to see if you can find a link. Plus, at age 7, maybe he can share with you when he's in one of his good moods why he gets so angry. Maybe there is something deeper that is bothering him. Good luck to you ... keep us posted.

I know this may be hard with 2 other kids and a full time job but there is a great place here in Columbus called Columbus speech and hearing. I took my 6 year old son there for speech therapy and they worked wonders with him. Maybe this will not only help his speech issues but help with his confidence and anger. Have you talked to his pediatrician about his seeming bipolar? I am not one to promote putting kids on meds but it sounds like maybe your son might need to be evaluated for bipolar. We just went thru this with our 10 year old and his meds are helping him very much...hope this helps, and good luck

I have a 6 1/2 year old son who is in the first grade and has similar problems, his anger is maybe not has serious his mood just changes from being happy and silly to hanging his head sometimes crying and saying things like nobody likes him, nobody cares about him he could be playing a game having a great time and then all of a sudden say I don't want to play anymore you do not need me to play with you guys and he will hang his head and sulk. I am looking for answer as well as I guess I am not really sure how big of a problem this is and I don't want to make a bigger issue out of it than it actually is by taking him to the doctor for is or something. Anyway I guess I just wanted to tell you you are not alone and if you get some good advice let me know.

A.,

I am not sure that you receive a previous message from me, so I will attempt this again.

I am a 42 yr old who has a 16 yr old daughter and a 17 yr old son. From your writing, it sounds like you have been going through some simular issues that I experienced with my son in his earlier years. I took him to Dr. Cathy Gaw, psychologist at the Willoughby Hills, Cleveland Clinic. She is fantastic. She helped my son a great deal. She had regular sessions with him, to help him control and express his anger issues.

As far as the speech difficulty, have you had your son's hearing checked? If your son is hearing muffled, or incorrectly then this could cause a great amount of difficulty and anquish. And yes, you are correct that this will also have an effect on his social ability with others his age. Does your family member assist in helping him to speak correctly, or do they kind of aid him in the difficulties that he is having? I know that correcting a child's speech of such an age will be frustrating on everyone, but explain to him that you are attempting to help him so that he can have more friends. And reward him with something that he likes, stickers, hotwheels, etc., when he has accepted the help or when he has started to correct himself with things that he has had difficulty with in the past.

You may want to sit in on the first few sessions, if you take him to a psychologist, and ask them to point you in the direction of some books that you can read to help you understand him and assist him.

Believe me when I say, that I know you are a very busy lady. I was working full time at a children's social service agency and learned a great deal while there, also I was going to college full time, and dealing with both kids when my son had these issues. My husband is the type that feels this is just a growing up stage and things will work themselves out. But I felt different, and I am glad that I did.

As for my son, he swore into the Army on last Wednesday. He knows where he wants to go with his life and how to get there. That is more than I can say for myself when I was that age. He has friends, and is enjoying life. The two of us are very close and we communicate regularly. I honestly feel that the time and love that I put into helping him through everything has brough the two of us closer together. I am proud of my son, and I know that even though you are proud of yours right now, some day you will be even more so. So invest the time and the love, it is well worth it.

Good Luck!

EdithM

Looking in to his diet is a very good suggestion. Some different types of sugars will affect peoples moods. There also maybe something he is allergic to. My youngest is allergic to red food color (all numbers) and in addition to the rash he gets meaner than a green eyed snake if he accidentally has some.

Definitely talk to his doctor. This could get in the way of his learning. Ask his teachers if they notice anything as well. Teachers see our kids about as much as we do and they are usually willing to help if asked.

Hi A.. This sounds a lot like me as a kid and my son now. My has has been very difficult to discipline since he was....well 2. He gets frustrated easily and is VERY emotional. He will be screaming at you one minute, refusing to do something and the next crying and saying he is sorry.

WE sought help for my son. We found out he is gifted. I don't know what this means exactly in regards to much in our lives EXCEPT we did find out gifted kids tend to behave like this ! I did a lot of research and found out gifted kids have a very high tendancy to defy authority because they don't think the rules are locigal or whatever in their own minds. (granted most times young kids can't tell you this...but my son has said things that now makes me say, yeah I can see that.) I also found out gifted kids have a lot of social issues AND they are prone to anxiety at a much higher level than other kids. Could it be possible that he is VERY bright or gifted? If so obviously it doesn't SOLVE anything but taking a different attitude and even realizing you aren't alone is very helpful.

The other thing I thought of....with me growing up, no one ever bothered to find out why I was soooo emotional. Why I was depressed most of my childhood. No I don't think I was gifted what so ever. I think my issues were from my Father's manic depression...or let me say it this way, I think I inherited that from him. Things could have been so different if my parents would not have ignored it. So I encourage you...if you think there is even a possibility that he is bi-polar or any kind of chemical imbalance in the brain..find out now. Don't let him grow up like this if there is something that can be done.

With our son we tried anti-anxiety meds and for about 4 months he was a totally different kid !!!! The 5th month the meds starting having the opposite effect and he was EXTREMELY angery...like the devil child ALL DAY! So he immediatly went off the meds. I have not pursued more meds because I wanted to try a more natural approach. We use homeopathic flower essences and they work wonders with no side effects. Even when we forget them, I think my son feels that he is in more control and has improved sooo much in the last 4 months since starting them.

I hope this at least gives you something to think about. I wish you the best!

Blessings.
M.

A.
i know your pain! I have 4 kids my third is truely bipolor she was diagnosed at the age of 5 with sensory intragration disorder and bipolor, ADHA, Anxiety disorder at the age of 7. We have been in and out of theapy. She has been on countless numbers of meds. And truelly she is the sweetest, funniest, most beautiful person i know as long as she is getting her way!
And with 4 and my husband and the house it is not all about her all the time! And The thing about his speech... she has a hearing problem and they say most of her frustration stems from that! So it may be that since he can not control how he communicates he's going to control what he can and that is his behavior. my little one gets so angery and frusterated when she feels like she is not being understood. My suggestion is that you find a good phycologist, neurologist, and therapist team. If you are in the cleveland area university hospital has thee BEST Child Phsy.Dept. and Rainbows has a great therapy dept. and neuroligy group. Keep your head up and know that if you ever need someone to talk to I will be here us moms with special kids need to stick together.
K.
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I'd recommend a counsler appointment with the school counselor, if his behavior is school related, might just be a misunderstanding, is his father around? and then i would take him to see a psychiatrist, bi-polar or a depression is something that children need help with asap! I hope I can help I have 2 girls, 8 and 13 . where I will be handling this same situation soon!

Hi A.
When I read your message it reminded me of my son. I highly suggest taking him to a psychiatrist. They will be better equip to handle this situation. I know because that is what I did. As a parent we want our children to be happy and when they are young we don't want to over look anything that might be contributing to their behavior. My son is now 16yr old and he seems much more adjusted. Many Blessings to you and your loved ones.
D.

PS My son has been angry since he was born and also is highly intelligent.