K.H. asks from Indianapolis, IN on February 19, 2009
Almost 14 Month Old Won't Sleep in Her Crib
My daughter, born 12/12/07, will NOT sleep in her crib. She does not take many naps during the day (maybe 1 one hour nap) and is usually asleep by 9:30 or 10 at night. However, the minute I lay her in her crib, she pops up and cries. I don't have the heart to listen to her cry for hours (and she wakes up my other 2 daughters). Any advice on how to get her to sleep in her crib?
So What Happened?™
Thanks to everyone for all the advice. I found what worked best was putting her in her crib and then sitting next to her and patting her back. She fell asleep, but woke up shortly after I left the room. She was soo tired she only fussed for about 10 minutes and put herself right back to sleep! She never really 'cried' but more fussed. It only took one night and she is sleeping 9-10 hours by herself! Thanks again for the wonderful advice!!
More Answers
M.P. answers from Indianapolis on February 20, 2009
Just keep putting her back into the bed. If she cries, give her a few minutes, pick her up calm her, lay her back down.
Start on Thurs night. Tell your girls they will not get much sleep that night, or have them sleep on the living room floor. They will be tired Fri, but it is only one day. Try again Fri and Sat, by Sun night she should be sleeping just fine in her bed. Do not give in. It may take a couple of hours. She may wake in the night and cry again, do the same thing.
One thing that might help is put a heating pad on her bed to warm it and then remove it before you lay her down. Pat or jiggle her a little when you first lay her down and gradually decrease it.
Good luck.
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A.N. answers from Indianapolis on February 20, 2009
HI K., My son had the same problem. My "CIO" friends kept telling me to do just that, but I"m glad I read the Dr. Sears website. He is very non-judgemental and said that children that young are not trying to control or manipulate you and that sometimes there is a medical reason for them crying. So I went to my Dr. after several weeks of this and found out he had fluid build up in his ears because they weren't draining properly. We had tubes put in his ears and within 2 days he was sleeping great lying flat in his crib. I'm SO GLAD I didn't do the CIO. I feel like my son trusts me to meet his needs. Anyway, if she's lying flat, you might want to have her ears checked, especially if she gets colds or ear infections a lot. Also, Dr. Sears' site is: www.askdrsears.com He offers several solutions for tired parents, not necessarily just co-sleeping.
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M.R. answers from Cincinnati on February 19, 2009
9:30 to 10:00 seems super late to be going to bed for the night. Try backing up the bedtime. If you don't have the heart to listen to her cry, then you need to accept that this might be a rather difficult task. Think about it...you put her down, she cries, you run to her. She has learned "I don't like the crib, therefore I will cry and mommy won't make me sleep in the crib".
You may wish to read "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. He is a nationally know, respected pediatrician who specialized in infant/child sleep issues with over 30 years of research and practice. You will learn when and why your child should be sleeping, how to get them into a crib, and how to let them fall asleep on their own. He offers both a CIO and a gentler technique for putting a child to sleep.
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K.Y. answers from Canton on February 20, 2009
put her in a big girls bed with a guard on it put on some gospel or soothing music surprise yourself.K.
P.R. answers from Indianapolis on February 20, 2009
Where does she take her naps? Just curious. If it is a play pen, whatever, maybe it would be best to let her sleep there at night. You might try what my friend finally did, she put the crib mattress on the floor against the wall, put bed rails along the open side of it and just let her son sleep there instead of the crib. He didn't wake up screaming. I always put my children to bed in their cribs, then sat in a rocking chair in the room and read them a story, sang them a song, turned on the nightlight and they went to sleep in the crib on their own with a few favorite stuffed toys. If they started crying I stood next to them for a few minutes rubbing their back until they settled down but refused to get them back up. Just a suggestion.
S.B. answers from Indianapolis on February 20, 2009
I have a 12 month old and had an awful time getting her to sleep in her crib. I believe that your bedtime is way too late for a 14 month old. All research shows that a 7:30 - 8:00 pm bedtime is the most sufficient and healthy bedtime for a toddler. I go upstairs at 7:30 everynight and read a book, rock and then give her lots of kisses and hugs. I tell her that it is night night time and that I'll see her in the morning. I say "I love you, night night" over and over in a whisper until I am out the door. It took us about four days for her to understand that it was bedtime and she was staying in there on her own. She sleeps from 8pm to 7am.... If I put her down past 8, even 10pm, she still wakes up at 7am, as do most kids. She does cry for a minute at her nap and nighttime, but crying doesn't hurt them. Research shows this over and over again. Five to twenty minutes of crying is worth the 11 hour night of sleep that my whole family gets now, including her. Good luck.
S.D. answers from Indianapolis on February 20, 2009
I don't believe in CIO either, I think it's cruel:( Check out "The Baby Whisperer". She doesn't seem to know much about breastfeeding or breastfed babies, but her sleep training methods are great; compassionate and loving:)
V.W. answers from Cleveland on February 20, 2009
you might have to put her in a toddler bed my oldest daughter did the same thing and she was put in a toddler bed at 9 months old
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