Advise for Swim Party

My personal opinion is that you are playing with danger to have a pool party with young children. If you plan on following through, you should hire a lifeguard. Sure it's a parent's responsibility to watch, but as a mother of a toddler you know it only takes a SECOND of distraction for a child to get into trouble. I am not an attorney, but you may be liable if something hapens not to mentions the horror, guilt, and eternal memory of your son't birthday party in the event of a crises.

Plan an age appropriate party...with two friends. If you feel you must invite everyone, how about a wading pool in the front yard? Or stay at your house for cake and ice cream. Two year-olds are self absorbed, so think about who you're having the party for.

Sorry to be so grim, but a REAL pool party for 2 year olds is not reasonable.

2 moms found this helpful

This may be a little late, but I would just put there will be no lifeguard at the party so all childern will be required to have their parent with them if they are in the pool. That way they know that if their child wants to swim they are going to have to get in the pool with them.

2 moms found this helpful

Never assume anything.
It only takes 1 or 2 seconds for a parent to be distracted and a terrible accident could happen.
I didn't have a "pool party" for my child until she was 13.
2 year olds won't even remember the party !
I would recommend a party at McDonalds where they can jump in the balls, bumper bowling, or an indoor play place.
Save the pool parties for when they are old enough.
If a child drowned...could you live with that???

1 mom found this helpful

"No lifeguard on duty!"

1 mom found this helpful

B.,

I don't think a pool party is a great idea for a 2-year old birthday party. If you're going to have it, the parents MUST stay with their child at the party. You cannot be expected to watch several little ones around a pool. Good luck!
C.

1 mom found this helpful

While it's unfortunate that sometimes parents have to be reminded that they are expected to watch their children at events like this, if the worst case scenario were to happen at your son's party would it really make you feel any better to be able to say, "I told you that you were responsible for watching your own child"? I think the safest and wisest thing to do is to hire a lifeguard to come to the party. Even with a lifeguard on duty I would hope most parents would still be watching the kids, but this would make me feel a little bit better as the host of the party.

Good Luck,
K.

1 mom found this helpful

I would highly recommend not having a party if you are not willing to take that responsibility. When parents drop off their kids, they are going to make that assumption. If you want a safe environment for a group of kids around the age of 2 then forego the pool party for another time. Have the party without the pool and your son can invite friends over at a later time who have the proper skills to be in a pool. This is an accident waiting to happen and a HUGE issue should something happen even if the parents stay in attendance.

If you must insist on having the pool party for children of such a very young age, then you should also be prepared for the liability in the event something should happen. I would also put in the invitation that the child invited should bring their own lifeguard since there will not be one in attendance. The child should NOT be left alone at the party and to be prepared to bring their own towel too. (been there done that with the whole pool thing! LOL )

Good luck,

Deb

1 mom found this helpful

B.:

I love the idea of hiring some local life guards. That would show the responsibility and alleviate your need to stay poolside. Also, having refreshment and food for the parents and enforce that they stay.

The other moms are right, you and your parents will be liable if anything happens and sadly, most people only carry $100,000 or $300,000 liability on their home owner's insurance. Instead of a pool party, why not host a "Water Party" with wacky sprinklers and wading pools.

But most importantly, at two years old, be very direct with the other parents that they are wanted and expected to stay. This is not a drop-off party.

Best of luck and best wishes to your little one.

B.

1 mom found this helpful

It does not matter what you you have them sign or what warnings are put on the invitation. The bottom line is that you (the property owner) are responsible and liable if a child is injured on your property. If you can't afford to hire a lifeguard, then maybe a different venue should be considered for 2 year olds.
I have never met one that actually "listened"!!!! :)))

1 mom found this helpful

While this sounds like a fun idea for the kids...I personally just wouldn't have a pool party with multiple two year olds. Maybe 3 or 4 yr olds but I would be a nervous wreck if there were over two kids in a pool at my son's party.

BUT, I would not worry about being rude in the invite. The parents should already know to watch their own kids. Be very firm in the invite. Highlight it even. Use all caps.

And most of all, GOOD LUCK!!

1 mom found this helpful

If I were in this situation, I would not invite the ones that do not listen. Also, I WOULD hire a lifeguard. In this litigious society, you can't be too careful. Parents will start chatting and not be watching their children 100% of the time. It's just not possible. Good Luck!

1 mom found this helpful

I was going to suggest that you note that there be no lifeguard on duty, but someone beat me to it.

I'd like to ask, though, is it customary for people to have pool parties for 2-year-olds?? My girlfriend just had a splash party for her 2yo's birthday, with lap pools and other "stations" across the yard. They were able to easily run around and splash in and out of the water. I just don't understand why anyone would host a swimming pool--not splash pool, or lap pool--party for such a young and small group of children who would enjoy splashing but would most likely be in and out of the water and running around. That's a big body of water to work with. I don't mean to pick on you, but this puzzles me so every time I see it, and I just couldn't hold back. I'm not saying that it's wrong; I just don't get it.

1 mom found this helpful

Don't worry about being polite. It needs to be said. But if you want to say it a little nicer then you might say something like, "There isn't going to be a lifeguard attending, so in addition to watching your little one please help out by keeping an eye on others." That way they won't be offended that you are implying they won't take care of their own kid, instead it will seem as though you are simply asking them for help overall to insure the safety of everyone. Good luck, and happy birthday to the birthday boy!

1 mom found this helpful

You are taking the risk of having a pool party for a group of 2 year olds, so you have to assume all responsibility. If you are not willing to assume the responsibility then you have to ask yourself why in the world would you want to open yourself to such risk for a 2 year old child who will not remember anything at all about this party. Are you really doing this for his enjoyment or for yourself. If you really are doing this for your child then maybe the best solution would be to limit the amount of guest so that you can keep it managable. The other parents are doing you a favor by accepting your invitation, you are not doing them a favor by inviting them. You have to take the role that you are imposing on their time by inviting them to your child's party. Again, a child under the age of 3 will not remember much about his party what's so ever. I say save yourself the headache and the money and just go out and buy your child the gifts that he would have gotten from his friends. Make it safe and just have cake and ice cream and do a play date indoor instead of having a pool party for a group of 2 year olds. Its too risky and you don't want to be responsible for a mishap. What if something does happen to a child, do you really want that on you and on your child's birthday? If the worst does happen, what's going to be the memory from this party? Don't do it.

We are having a swim party too, I would say lets have a fun time by the pool please be extra vigiliant of your child as we will be by or in the pool for most of the party. Look forward to see you there.

Usually when the kids dont listen thats there parents fault. I would see if you couldnt find a teen to be in the pool or around the pool as a life guard. I personally wouldnt allow a grand parent because once there grand child gets out of the pool there focus is on that kid alone. Also I would consider not inviting them and let them know, if they ask, you think its dangerous for them espically because they are known not to listen. Good luck.

I would ask the parents to be in the pool with there children since there will be no life guard attending the party.

I know this is late, :-) But I wanted to add my 2 cents.

We have an in ground pool at our home. So we have lots of swim parties. Many children from our street also attend and the age range is huge - 3 - 16. And there are many, so we always put on our invites the following: Swimming permitted
after the party. Parental supervision required for ALL children. Sometimes, we do get a few parents that don't listen or leave the older sibling in charge of the younger. That is just something that is going to happen anyway.

I know you are a single mom, but maybe you could get someone to stay in the water as the "lifeguard" if you are not going to hire anyone. My husband usually takes care of this for us. When we see a child that does not have their parent out side, we ask that child to sit on the chairs outside the pool until their parent returns. This usually gets the child asking the parent to come back out or they cannot swim. :-) FYI if things are going to happen they are going to happen anyway. My youngest son, a very good swimmer, cut his chin on the side of the pool. He was doing tricks. He had to get 6 stitches. I was out there the whole time watching him and the other boys. I actually saw him twist, hit the side, and pop back up from the water. So sometimes things just happen. I wouldn't worry too much. He asked the doctor if he could still go swimming the next day, so I don't think it affected him :-)

Good luck and have fun!!! :-)

Hi B., Hope this is useful. One your invitation let it be known that no child is allowed in the pool without one of there parents. No parent in pool, no child in pool. My friend does that and it works great.

I was a guest at a pool party last month and the host of the party never even made it in the pool! She was putting out food, serving, chatting with guests arriving at different times, then opening gifts with the birthday boy, etc. So, no, you won't be supervising at all! I would even get someone to agree to swim with your own child (grandpa, friend, etc.) so you can truly host without worrying about your child's safety. If each kid in the pool has a parent in charge of that child & his/her behavior and swimming safety, you'll have no problems. If you think some parents will just expect to sit by and let someone else supervise, then either don't invite them (!) or put something in the invitation about "mom & dad, don't forget your swimsuit! swim with a buddy for safety!" or something like that.
The party I went to had just as many adults in the pool as kids. I felt safe (for the kids) and it was fun! Have a great celebration!

P. (mom to three boys)

If you are hosting the party and they are your guests, it is in the long run your responsibility and liability. I like the idea of having at the bottom, "no lifeguard on duty". I know you don't want to be the one stuck watching others children as you need to host the event. It is still very important to have a designated person...maybe have one of the grandparents sit by the pool to keep an eye out for all the children playing. It is often in large group situations that there are accidents because one adult thinks another adult is watching and they aren't. If this a huge concern maybe you should consider a party on land.

Read you request for advise and boy does it scares me. Even though the invite may state that no life guard is on duty and that the parent is responsible for the child while they swim, bottom line is if a child gets hurt on your property on in your pool you are responsible. When my children were growing up I always had the parent sign a consent form that stated the child did the activity on their own risk. They could not sue me for their child not obeying the rules or if he got hurt due to his or her own actions. I was still told that I could be held responsible.

I wish you the best of luck and many happy birthdays to come.

Be polite but to the point, something along these lines: "Due to the nature of a swimming party for small children, parents are responsible for supervising their children in the pool. Thank you for your cooperation and understanding!"

Maybe a line at the bottom that reads something like, "Moms and Dads bring your suits too since your eyes will need to be on your kiddos in the pool." or "Moms and Dads bring your suits too since you will be the lifeguards" Also, most people would assume with a pool party that they will need to watch their own kids, I would hope!! Anyway, good luck.
C., SAHM of 4 boys.

Hi B.. Not an easy call. This is only my opinion so here goes. If it were my party I would simply inform the parents that it will be very busy with alot of very young children. It would be appreciated if at least one of the parents be in the pool with their child to avoid any problems. Good luck.

L.

I'm with the majority here...either hire a lifeguard or don't have a pool party. We have a pool- I have pulled no less than three children out of the pool myself WHILE THEIR PARENTS WERE THERE. One woman was watching her child try to bounce to the surface and kept saying "Are you OK?" to her as she struggled up...until I finally jumped in and pulled the girl to the edge. Turns out the mother couldn't swim either so she was afraid to go in after her. The splash pools are a FABULOUS idea- go with that.

i've been to a couple of swim parties this year, and both party invitations said, "lifejackets and swim shoes are mandatory". both also hired 1-2 lifeguards from their neighborhood pool...about $10 an hour...just gave them a piece of mind...good luck!

Why are you having a swimming party for 2 year olds? Are these those little swimming pools that are less than a foot deep? I hope you have someone there to be with your child the entire time, b/c you will be too busy and distracted to be his main lifeguard. I would save it for next year. Good luck!

I would like to encourage the parents to stay and participate in the swimming activities for the safety of the children.

I would hope that parents would have enough sense to watch their children...but I also know that is also not reality in some cases. My advise would be to make sure that ALL kids that could not swim bring floaties, swimming devices of the sort...maybe make a note on the invitation that goes out to everyone, and it would not be a bad idea to have a few extras for the party. Happy Birthday to your son!!

K

I would just tell them when they arrive that there is no lifeguard and they are responsible for watching their own child. I never took my kids to swim parties at that age due to the fact they could not swim. I watch them closely but at a social gathering where I want to mingle too, it is easier just to leave them home. If you have a helper that is a good idea too.

ypu are braver than I am. When ever there are alot of people and kids with water you can count on the fact that someone will not be watching their child. I went to a 4th birthday party and there was one mom talking away while her son got into the deep end. If you wanted to be sure it would be safe you could have everyone sign a waiver that you are not respondsible if something happens to their child. Or you could get a life guard to assist. They usually charge about 10.00 an hour. Good luck

Hi B., I agree, hire a lifeguard. Unfortunately, though you don't want to be responsible for all the kids in & around the pool, you are because you're hosting the party & inviting them to swim. We just had a pool party & we had a lifeguard. If you don't want to do that, then I would suggest using the buddy system. Each child has a buddy & I would only allow the kids to be in the pool for organized games (red light, green light, marco polo, etc) & activities. That way you can be the "announcer" & stand at the pool to lead them in games & watch them. Organize the party in such a way that there is swim time, game time, cake time, & time to open gifts. Even with a structured day, there is simply no substitute for watching the kids like a hawk. With children & pools you can never be too cautious & though you can let parents know ahead of time, you are ultimately responsible for these kids & their safety at the party. Some parents may not realize the dangers involved, so you have to take the lead.

I think it would look cute if you could find a small life jacket stamp or one of those circle life bouys (sp?) or maybe even an anchor. Stamp the card and then write beside it "No lifeguard on duty. Swim at your own risk". But also make sure that you have plenty of pool floaties and water noodles to go around. You should be able to pick those up at any dollar store pretty cheap or even at Walmart since it's the end of the season.

if yo are going to have a swim party for toddler's you should take responsibility for everyone's safety at the pool. it will be well worth the expense to hire a certified lifeguard who's time with you will be dedicated to the kids and the pool. of course it will be the parent's responsibility to wath their child, but it is so difficult to watch a group of kids and be at a party and things can slip by and not be noticed. not that long ago tommy lee & pamela anderson had a pool party and a young boy drowned while he was at the party and everyone was paying attention. they where sued, even though it was perceived that the parents were there to ensure the safety of their children. it would be just awful to have any tragedy mar your little one's birthday. something you should do is go to a CPR class (both for adult & child reviving) so you will be prepared for your own child in the future. you can probably call the ymca in your neighborhood to find a certified life guard on an hourly basis.

Hi Briget. First of all why have a pool party (with all it;s potential for hard feels when kids don't behave in safe ways and potential for real danger?). Why not a sprinkler party? Just as fun and a whole lot safer. Man you are treading in dangerous waters with the pool thing for kids that small. Shoot I would rather stick helmets on their tiny heads and throw them out on a roller skating floor than anywhere around a pool. Just not enough capable eager to help pool hands these days hehehehe.

Wow, I just got the rest of your answer (and you have your own answer so why ask). You sound pretty determined to have the party. It has larger kids, lots of parents, safety etc. so what is the problem?

Hi B., you can add something like parental supervision please...hope that helps.

first you need to have them sign a waiver for accidents that could happen so that your family is not responsible. Next make sure their parents know in the waiver that they need to stay because your little man will be keeping your hands full.
We use to have pool parties all the time and have only had one accident because their parent wasnt watching and he learned his lession from me having to give CPR to the child. Yes the baby was alright. But it show that even with all thats going on something could happen anyways so protect your parents and yourself with the waiver.

Hope you have fun.

How about "Parents: Just a friendly reminder that this is a swimming party with no exclusive lifeguard dedicated. By accepting this invitation and attending this event, you are accepting responsibility for watching your own child in the pool. Tragedy can happen quickly, please DON'T let it be your child."

My friend who is a grandmother has the rule for her pool that children under ten years old cannot swim without a parent in the pool. This has really stopped the "drop and drive" parents- and it saves you from having to fuss at other people's children. I think it also really covers well the liablility issue- and of course you really don't want someone hurt! I would even make a sign! (No parents- no swim!)My parents also once hired one of the neighborhood kids who was a lifeguard for a summer pool party where there were multiple (non-family) kids- it worked well. Good luck!

I would tell each parent that they must get into the pool with their own child, and if the parents leave the pool then their child must get out with them. It's a recipe for disaster if they don't. Tell the parents that you will be too busy taking care of the party to watch their children. Good luck with everything,have fun!

My daughter has a pool and 3 boys. She has had several birthday parties and baseball parties and she hires a Life Guard - usually college students who life guard at area pools or country clubs. You have a Red Cross trained life guard, CPR trained, etc. but you still need responsible parenting.

B.,

I don't mean to be overly harsh but you are assuming a huge responsibility here. And, no matter what you put on the invite, you and the owner of the pool will be held responsible if anything happens. If you don't feel like being a lifeguard then I suggest you don't have the party at the pool, that or hire a professional lifeguard for the course of the party. All it takes is 3 seconds for a child to get in a dangerous situation and drown. I'm a former lifeguard and speak from experience of my days at the pool. Parents are good, generally, at watching their own children when they are around water but sometimes they turn their backs for a second. Also, with parents focusing on their own children it's easy for another child to get overlooked. The possiblities for a dangerous situation are too great. Please be careful with this type of party.

There is absolutely no way that I would have a pool party if everyone did not know how to swim.

Even a good swimmer can get into trouble in a pool.

You would be held liable (or the property owner/grandparents) if anything happened.

You can't count on the parents to watch their child. Even if they sign a waiver -- a waiver is for your peace of mind, and a signed piece of paper is not going to be able to erase a tragedy.

I personally would not have a swim party for a 2 year old. You say not many have been invited...just how many is "not many". The general rule for children's parties used to be one for each year of age, but modern parents seem to have thrown out that rule. Surely the invited parents know that they should keep their eyes ever on their child, but just in case, I'ed plan all activities around the pool...nothing inside the house, no matter how hot and uncomfortable it is. Is your parent's pool a large one that can accompdate adults? If so, make it a family swim and invite the parents to bring along their swim suits too. Just don't have so many people there that they get so involved with each other that they neglect the babies. You might add a disclaimer at the bottom of the invitation that there will be no paid life saver on duty.

I am not quite sure what to put on the invite but I do suggest hiring a lifeguard.

When I was in high school, I was a lifeguard at a neighborhood pool. I always got asked to lifeguard swimming parties at people's private homes. They would pay me $8 to $10 an hour.

For piece of mind, I think it would be well worth it. Plus, I am sure the high school student would enjoy making some spending cash.

Hey, you've gotten great answers, so I'd just say keep it simple and say, "No lifegaurd on duty so every swimmer must have a guardian."

Unfortunately, no matter what you do (even if you hire a lifeguard), the property owner is liable for injuries on their property. That goes for adult parties too.

I think it has all been said below, but I too wonder about a full-blown pool party for 2 year olds. I assume that you have a full size pool....I hope you have a fence around it....

All the suggestions below are great, I also love the idea of water stations and think that the 2 year olds may love it too, might be good to have even if you use the pool for some structured swim time as well.

I would think that a note on the invite that indicates the necessity of all parents attending to their own children since there will be water activites would suffice. Also, you can make some kind of game for who can put the floaties on the fastest (some kind of relay game I would think would make it fun for the kids and help give a nod to the parents).

Good luck! I know that the party will be crazy! Ahhh, the terrific two's!

I hope the party goes well! My sister had a pool party for her three year old. My girls were 3,2 and 1. and there were some other little ones too. She let her 3 YO in the pool and other little ones and my husband was the only adult in the pool! she was wearing floaties and the moment my girls went under (with floaties!) I pulled them out of the pool but my sister's child and others were still in there so I had to watch mine run around the pool while I kept trying to keep them away (after all, I was outnumbered!)

I would certainly say on the invitation "swim at your own risk, please bring life vests, not floaties, for children under 4 feet tall." It's good to mention that many pools no longer permit floaties because it gives parents a false sense that the child is safe from drowning.

That sounds like so much fun. Are the children that you are inviting family?
I was a life guard as a teen and hired for private parties. The public pool season is winding down and there are probably plenty of life guards looking for some extra cash. Children are more likely to listen to a life guard than mom anyway, just because of the embaressment factor. Call your local pool and ask for a referance, or to see if you can post a flyer in their locker room. They shouldn't cost much more than your average babysitter.
A reminder on the invite is a good idea also, even if you do end up hiring one. Good luck and have fun!

Plan and simple. NO LIFE GUARD ON DUTY

B.,

I can relate to your situation. We had a birthday swim party for our 5 year old a few months ago and was concerned for the same reasons. Instead of spending the energy stressing over the "what if's", we hired 2 babysitters that we know very well and asked them to stay in the pool to play with the kids and keep their eyes out. It worked very well for us, but there were only 2 or 3 kids that came that really needed an extra set of eyes. It's not ideal to have to spend more money, but we felt it was well worth it and our sitters ended up helping us in so many ways that day. If you choose not to do that, maybe you could politely (and simply) state on the invitation that "there will be no lifeguard, so parents please watch your precious one's closely while they are swimming and having fun". Good luck and I hope that helps you.
M.

B.,

My daughters are almost five and just turned two. We had some friends over early this summer, and there were only six of us at the time; me with my two, and the other mom with her two kids. Her oldest saw my oldest without floaties on, and decided to try. We had turned our backs for two seconds (dealing with the two-year-olds), and I turned around just as she went under. Luckily, I was able to grab her quickly and easily.

At that moment, I implemented a no-floaties, no-swim policy, anytime we have company, including my oldest. When the rest of our friends showed up that day, one of our four-year-old friends refused to wear the extra floaties I had, so his mom ended up running home to get the life-jacket he was accustomed to.

Shortly thereafter, we were planning a pool party for our two-year-old's birthday (my two-year old LOVES to swim), and on the invitation, my exact words were: Please bring your swimsuits and floaties (given the large number of kids to keep track of - we ask that they all wear floats in the pool, please). . . .
If anyone forgot theirs, I had LOTS of the cheapy $1 floats on-hand (you can pick them up at Walmart or any pool store). If they wouldn't wear them, I'd calmly explain that they weren't allowed in the pool. It also helps that we have a safety fence around our pool. If they didn't have floats on, they weren't even allowed in the gate.

Also, to prevent the chaos of EVERYONE in the pool ALL the time, we also had a slip-n-slide that was a huge hit, even with the grown-ups! :-D

Though, when in doubt - hire a lifeguard.

Enjoy two - it's a lot of fun!
M.