Advice Regarding Swimming Lesson Disaster...

Updated on April 10, 2007
M.K. asks from Portland, OR
28 answers

Five minutes into my 2 1/2 year old son's first swimming lesson he chocked on water and threw up in the pool. I was, of course, mortified.

We recently welcomed our second son, and I had meant these swimming lessons to be my special time with my older son, and so would really like to continue them.

However, I'm embarrassed about what happened and am unsure the other parents would want us back. Should I continue on with the lessons? Will the other parents be accepting of us? Or should I just chalk this session up as a loss (no returns policy) and sign up for the next session?

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So What Happened?

I would like to thank everyone who responded, your support has meant so much!

I had thought it might be best if I didn't talk about what had happened in front of my son - and maybe he would forget about it, but they're just too smart. He would ask "What did me do in the pool?" So we've talked about it and I've explained how it was an accident and chocking happens when you breathe in water, and compared it to his baby brother's spitting up. (He's only thrown up a couple of times in his life, and none that he remembers.) I'm really glad we have, and I think he feels more at ease with what happened.

He had absolutely loved swimming, and was disappointed that we were getting out of the pool after he had thrown up. He asked "Me keep swimming?" Luckily the shower was also a new experience which he found quite amusing.

We are definitely going to go back next Tuesday night. And I've definitely learned a lesson. No food for a good period of time before we go. (I should have remembered that old adage "Wait a half an hour before swimming.") And to hold off and trying to blow bubbles for a bit, even if the rest of the class is doing it. I really like the idea of working with him in the bath tub, thank you for suggesting that!

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A.P.

answers from Bellingham on

I would keep going and see how they respond to you. I would think that most people would see that that could happen to anyone. My daughter and I have been taking swimming lessons since she was 8 months and stuff like that happens sometimes. I hope you keep going. I doubt anyone would even mention it to you again.

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M.H.

answers from Seattle on

I'd definitely take him back (and I HAVE). My son is 27 months old, and we've been going to parent-tot class since he was 17 months old. He's had a few times where he's choked on water and thrown up. They're kids...it happens, and I think every parent in that class probably understands. Also, one thing that I do now...I don't let Nikolas eat before class. That way, if something like that happens...no food stuff comes up, just the water.

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J.W.

answers from Seattle on

I would go back, things happen and he's just a little guy so things like that are almost expected. Learning to swim is important also.

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S.O.

answers from Seattle on

M.,

Definately take him back! Don't worry what other parents think, because quite honestly, they probably don't care. I taught swimming lessons to children from age 6 months to 12 years for 7 years and we had mishaps now and again, and it was no big deal. Things happen and as parents...we KNOW things will happen. Don't let your mortification cause you to miss out on a fun time with your son. He needs it, not only for your attention but for confidence and security in the water. So, my suggestion to you is pretend it never happened and go have a good time!

Me: SAHM of 3 boys...7 1/2, 3 1/2, and 23 months.

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A.H.

answers from Portland on

My son chokes and pukes all the time. If I let that stop us from doing every day activities we might not go in public. I mean when he was younger he threw up several times a week on food, air, spit, water, etc. Now it's down to maybe twice a month. I really doubt that anyone will blame you for a small child throwing up. If they do, they probably don't have kids themselves. Go back, it's good for you and your son. Enjoy summer, it's getting so close now! :)

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N.D.

answers from Portland on

Hi M.,
I say you continue. Things like choking on water and throwing up happen... Try not to worry about the other parents. They should understand and if they don't then they're dorks. I'm just worried that by not going back because of an accident you'll be "teaching" the wrong thing. My opinion?..set a good example and show your son that it really doesn't matter what people think and that his faux-pa (sp?) isn't going to ruin your time together in the water. Whats the point in wasting the money when you two could really be having a good time?

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S.H.

answers from Portland on

Just keep with the lessons, its for your son not the other parents. If they can't understand that he didn't mean to and was choking, then they will get over it. Don't worry about what other people think, if you go through life like that, its not living for you or your family, its living for them. Help your son succeed, by completing these lessons, your son will thank you and you will feel more assured that he is a better swimmer because you stuck to it.

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T.C.

answers from Eugene on

In big letters I say CONTINUE!!!!! If I were a mom in that group I would not be the least bothered by your incident. The boy is only 2!!!! Its nothing to be embarrassed about!

This is a great idea for you and your son to have together time. Keep it up!

T.

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J.S.

answers from Spokane on

Hopefully those parents would understand that he's just a little kid- it's not like he meant to!!! And so I say, keep the lessons. It might be a little embarrassing the first day back...but that'll soon go away - and if the other parents act like it's a big deal - then they need to GROW UP and act like adults!!!! I hope you & your son have a GREAT time!!!

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A.L.

answers from Spokane on

I would keep going. Things happen and most other parents understand that. Plus my opinion is that you shouldn't deprive your son of learning an important skill because you feel embarassed. Part of being a parent is to be the strong one so your kids can see that it is ok to make mistakes. Sorry if this was a little blunt. :)

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K.K.

answers from Portland on

My sister is a swimming teacher and worked at the local pool for years. This is NOT uncommon! I would talk to the pool manager and get their advice... if the pool doesn't have a problem with it, I would say go back. In the mean time, I would try to get your son more used to the water at home. I play a lot of water games with my son while he's in the tub... "can you cover your mouth with water?"... "can you cover your nose and mouth?"... "I bet you can't get your entire face in the water!". This helps teach him how to hold his breath, keep his mouth closed, etc.

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S.S.

answers from Portland on

M., I think that you should continue with the swimming lessons and let your little guy know that he is important enough for that quality time you have set aside for him. Dont let an experience like that take over and ruin the time you had set aside for him. I would not be offended in any way if I was a parent of another child in that class. The worse part is over, now enjoy the time you have with him and just laugh at what happened.

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K.L.

answers from Spokane on

Definately take him back!! Things happen, and from a mom whose kids have vomited in public places...he needs to go back!! :) It will be so much fun. My kids have a sensitive gag reflex, and I don't know how many times I've had to deal with vomit at restaurants, stores, cars, etc. It happens, and most parents understand. It may seem weird, but it will definately never be something you forget!! It is good bonding time, don't take that away from him :) Good luck.

K.

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

M., you should definitely take him back. What happened, tho it doesn't happen often, is normal. If anything other parents are going to be sympathetic and glad it wasn't their child.

If you don't take him back he may not ever want to go back, even later. It is something like the old addage when you fall off the horse get back on.

Your attitude will determine alot what your son's and other's attitudes will be. If you continue to be mortified and believe that this was a major fopaugh he won't want to go and parents will steer away from you because of the negative atmosphere you're creating.

Remember, he had no control over choking and vomiting. You have nothing to be ashamed for and neither does he. If he had vomited at the grocery store would you stop going to that store? My daughter and her girlfriend did just that. Staff were very helpful getting it cleaned up. And I continued to shop there and no one noticed I was the one with 2 kids who vomited.

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

Hey M.,

I know that if I were one of the other parents in the class I would not think badly of you or your son for choking on some water then throwing up. Sounds like something that probably happens all of the time in a young childrens' swimming class. I say you should definitely go back to class. Also, maybe try not to make a big deal about it with you son, just so he doesn't get self-conscious. Good luck next week!! I'm sure you guys will do great!!

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M.Y.

answers from Spokane on

Go back! Kids do all kinds of embarassing things...I can't believe the other parents wouldn't be understanding. Think of all the pee in that pool anyways! :) This is what chlorine is for!

And if the other parents do have a problem, just wait, they'll have their time to be embarassed soon enough!

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J.M.

answers from Portland on

while I have not had this experiance before my son did puke huge amounts onto the carpet in the center of our baby and me group when he was a babe. I think, while us moms are mortified at such things, we are understanding of the situation if it was another mom. I think they would understand (and if they dont thats their problem) that those things happen and no one should expect you to quit the class and loose the money. Thats why their clorine in the pools, for accidents. Jen

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N.D.

answers from Seattle on

M.,

Continue to take your son to swim class. Anybody with children should understand. It is not like your son intentionally threw up. I have a son that has been in swim class for almost two years and on occasion there is a child that will loose control of their bodily functions at one time or another.

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T.P.

answers from Spokane on

Throwing up after choking is common, especially considering the alternative to not choking (which is drowning). The other parents are sure to realize that this was not intentional. Little kids who are new to water don't swim like fish the first day. You shouldn't feel bad about what happened. I'm sure if you go back no one will even talk about it. It is a special time for you and your son, so enjoy and take him back.

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L.J.

answers from Portland on

There is no reason to give up. The same thing could happen to any of those other kids. Your son needs to learn how to swim and it just doesn't matter what any of the other parents say. Besides I think all of the parents will be understanding and probably too busy helping their own child to notice.

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J.

answers from Portland on

Absolutely not! don't be silly...remember that all kids throw up once in a while and a pool is overwhelming. Every parent there has had an embarrassing moment so continue on! It will also let your child know not to give up in the face of challenge.
J.

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D.V.

answers from Portland on

If I were at the swim lessons with my daughters in the pool with your son, I would still expect to see you the following week. Sure throwing up is gross, but clearly it wasn't like he did it on purpose. I would definitely take him again. As a parent, I would have no ill feelings toward you nor towards your son. I would be shocked if anyone was worried about your son coming again. Throwing up is considered a one time event. You could not possibly predict if he will do the same thing again. If for some reason, he throws up again, then it would be wise to wait another year as he is not ready. Good luck. D. :)

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H.K.

answers from Seattle on

I sure would go back! It was an accident of a small child and could not be helped! If the other parents can't see that, then what kind of parents are they? This is your "special time" with your son. Don't let anything or anybody make you feel less than you are! I know that your embarassed. I just hope not too much! I'm positive children have thrown up in the pool before. Not to mention the other things kids do in the water! LOL Hold your head high and march right back into that class with your special little boy and have your Mommy and son time! You may just find a good humored friend out of this who saw everything and has empathy. I'm sure the other parents only felt bad for your son choking. At least thats what I believe! God bless you and your family! H. K.

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V.H.

answers from Portland on

Are you kidding me? Don't allow your embarrassment about an incident that happened hinder your child's ability to learn how to swim. These things happen--trust me, I used to be a swim teacher. This is not as uncommon as you might think. And IF the other parents remember (which they probably won't) they wouldn't have the nerve to say anything to you. Half of those folks were glad it wasn't them. Anyone that would judge you based on an incident like this, doesn't deserve your respect or time, period. You owe it to yourself and to your son to face both of your fears and just do it! All you have to do is believe and you can achieve!

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J.T.

answers from Spokane on

I would go back. I am sure the other parents understand that it was an accident. They are kids it happens. And if they want to give you flack about going back tell them tahts their problem. Like you said, you are try to have special fun time with him.

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A.M.

answers from Seattle on

I think that by signing up again you will be teaching your son that its alright, and it will be a good lesson in confidence, you shouldn't give up after one try. The other parents should be supportive of your decision to stick with it.

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R.M.

answers from Seattle on

As a swim instructor, and my mother and grandmother being swim instructors, it is very important to keep going. You don't want the child to develope a fear of water and that is what will happen if you take him out now. Around 2-3 years of age is when kids start to develope the fear and understand depth perception, so it is very, very important to keep going. The other parents wont be upset and will probaly be understanding if anything because it could happen to them as well. I am very happy that you started your child swimming because most parents start their children to late and it is much harder for them to learn the later they go.

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J.F.

answers from Portland on

Everyone has experienced some type of thing like this in their lives. It happens more than you know. Don't let this one of many little mishaps stop you from letting your son learn something that is fun. Don't let anyone take this time away from you and your son. Someday you will look back and laugh about it. I know I did!

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