Advice on Providing Childcare for Out of Town Guests for a Wedding

N. - I think it unfair (and possibly hurtful) to allow some kids, but not all. I don't think there's anything wrong with saying "adults" only; just be prepared: some people may not come if they cannot bring their kids. I think it would be appropriate to assist out of town guests with "finding" childcare, but I don't think it's your responsibility to pay for it. I don't know where your reception is, but if it's at a hotel, you could do as my friends did: they got an adult and some teens to keep all of the kids entertained in a hotel room during the reception. Out of town guests were more comfortable knowing their kids were in the building and not at some strange location or strangers home. Good luck & God Bless!

1 mom found this helpful

It is very hard to tell some people their children can come and some that they cant. You will learn that they will take it very personally when you tell them their child is not invited. I know it will add an expense to your wedding but will be worth it. I did invite choldren to my wedding and am very happy that I did. I had a childrens table for those old enough to sit withour their parents. At the table I had coloring books, crayons, bubbles, etc to keep them occupied. And when it came to dancing it was great. The kids got everything started. It was a lot of fun. You can talk to your reception site and ask what they suggest for kids. Mine only had me pay $12 per child under 12 for dinner. No matter what it is your day so enjoy it.

1 mom found this helpful

How about asking a teenager (or a couple of them) to watch the kids for you as a wedding present?
If any kids are invited, I think all should be.
However, it is YOUR day and you should do what you prefer. There is no way to please everyone. It is up to the parents to figure out care for their children. If you do have someone who is trustworthy available to watch them, I would say that is a bonus for the other parents. If not, it's really not your responsibility.

I know there are tons of babysitting services for groups of children. Maybe you could set one up and have all the parents chip in for the cost. I believe they plan games and such so it would be special/fun for the kids and less hassle for parents trying to find a sitter in a strange town.

One of the best weddings I went to was where the bride and groom actually hired a party entertainer for the kids. He did magic, made all the kids balloon animals, just generally entertained the kids, and incidentally lots of the adults thought it was very entertaining too! Just another option you could look into!

www.kidzinthebizz.org
I did not allow children at my wedding, it made for some hurt feelings and one lost friendship, but... it was my wedding, my wishes, and my money!

It's not your repsonsibility to provide baby-sitting. However, if they are out of town guests know that you might have to suck it up or risk that they will feel slighted and not attend. The choice is yours, but know that with every choice there are consequences. If you do choose to open the door make sure that there are some activities for the kids. You can create a special area in your reception hall that is specifically for the kids. Be creative with that one.

Hi N.,
I do wedding photography and have found that it is a rare occasion for a wedding not to include children. I am not saying it is right or wrong, but just that it doesn't happen too often.

My suggestions if you are dead set against children, is to make it difficult to bring children, but be prepared for that family not to come. You could make the menu more of an adult menu and move the time to more of an evening event (not a good idea for the photos). I think it is a wonderful idea to open a room for the kids nearby as some have suggested. You could do this with a seperate insert to the invetation...suggesting they bring a snack, sleeping bag and pillow. I am not sure how you would go about the sitter because I don't feel that is your responsibility.

C.

I don't think it's reasonable (or fun) to exclude children from a family wedding and can't imagine any kind of wedding without them!
If guests are coming from out of town and you don't welcome their children ... well, I wouldn't do that.

Let them know that children are not 'required' to attend. The teens might butt out then!