Advice on How to Keep Baby Happy

My husband was in the navy for 9 years and I can relate to having to take care of little one's when hubby's not there. I have 4 daughters, an 8 year old, a 6 year old, and twin 3 year olds. I am definitely past the infant stage but the memories are still strong. I say that you can regularly shower every day when your child is out of diapers. They are more mobile and self interested and then you have more time for yourself. And don't be afraid to allow your child to develop self soothing and self entertaining. You don't have to be a show for them 24 hours a day. I am so grateful that my children learned that because it makes them stronger. I didn't want to raise a child that is extremely dependant all their lives. what's realistic for me? I read to them once a day, we do some sort of activity (library, park, games) once a day, then you have 3 meals a day(or feedings), bath time, changing time, etc. but you don't have to entertain them all day. You give plenty to your baby. playdays are great. if you can get into a mom's club it's helpful. your baby can grow up with other babies and you can find sanity in talking to other moms. They do have them in the seattle area. You need time for yourself. The mom's club I was in did a girls night out once a month going to the movies, out to eat, an indoor pool party with manicure's and pedicures if mom's preferred that. It's healthy to not forget yourself. Good luck.

If you don't want to put your baby down to do differnt things like laundry and check email, put him in a baby bjorn. I wore my daughter around for atleast the first 6 months. She loved it and was always so happy and peaceful.

For when you shower, you've gotten some pretty good advice already. The only additional thing I can suggest is your baby should be taking a pretty early morning nap a few hours after he gets up in the morning. Why don't you shower when he goes down for that nap. That's what I used to do when I had my son. Something else I used to do is bring the baby einsten mat thing into the bathroom and lay it on the floor. My son would usually fall asleep under it while I showered!

Hope you find something that works for you. good luck.

I agree with the boppy in the bathroom or you wait until your hubby gets home.
Other than that, at that age I don't think I played much with my baby. Just prop him up so he can see you or take him along in a sling or carrier when you go about your activities and talk to him, explain what you're doing or sing.
I don't agree with the notion that babies that age need an age appropriate curriculum. They learn best and most from physical contact with you and hearing your voice. I still sing and dance with my 7 month old in a carrier on my back when I do the dishes - we started this when she was first born, it's silly but she loves it.

You can shower either while he is asleep, or take a baby chair into the bathroom with you if he is awake. That is what I do. Or I wait for my husband to come home from work and then take my shower. As for activities, don't worry too much, babies that age have a very short memory so any activities you do with them can be repeated over and over and it's actually better for them that way. They love to know what to expect and what is coming so keep doing the same activities again and again. Don't worry about being creative until your baby is older.

M.,
I had that shower issue, when my baby was tiny too. What I did was put him in his bouncer and bring it into the bathroom. That way I could see him through the shower door/curtain and hear if he cried but I could still shower. And as for putting him down, like mentioned in another reponse, it's a great time for him to check things out and look around. That's how he learns about the world around him! So it's great that you allow him that time to check things out and make his own observations. My son used to love to watch the ceiling fan. He'd lay and watch it for a while. He'd laugh, giggle and coo. So, I let him. You'll find different things he likes to see/watch. If you have a bouncer - put him in that in different places or faced in different directions so he can look at different things.
Mom needs some arm free time too!
Good Luck!

First of all, there is no such thing as too much attention for any child. Taking a shower can be tricky if you do it when he is not sleeping. I had one of those bouncy seats that I put in the bathroom and put by kids in that while I showered. Then when they got bigger and didn't want to be in it as long I would take them out as soon as I was out of the shower and let them roam in the bathroom while I got ready. We keep a bottom drawer full of their toys and books so they have something to do besides pulling everything else out of the cabinets. You'll do fine, just find a safe place for you son and he'll be able to entertain himself while you shower. I also had the circular safety gate thing that I used with my first child once he was mobile. It gave him some room to play, but kept him safe while I couldn't see him.

I put a bouncy chair in one bathroom and a bumbo in the other for shower times. The bouncy chair had things that dangled from it.

Also, there was a time I could lay him in the bed with a mobile over him, and he'd be happy for 20 minutes or more!

But generally, for times when you're not in the bathroom, I'd recommend wearing your baby. Check out babywearing or attachment parenting (all the Sears books, including The Baby Book address this topic). I tried all the baby carriers and loved the moby wrap the best for the first several months. Birth and Beyond in Seattle will help you learn to use and love your moby. Soooo comfortable for you and baby (and yes, way better than Bjorn. I liked it better than sling, too).

I don't know how much is too much holding, how much is too little. But I figure that our baby spent about half his waking hours being held or fed in some way, and that felt about right.

You'll settle in to what feels right for you and your baby.

Also, if you're in Seattle, check out First Weeks. You will be so very glad to meet moms who are just where you are. Hit a drive through mocha place on the way -- you'll feel really treated and accomplished! :)

Hi M.,
I am so excited for you.. I found if I would start my day off by showering and getting myself ready for the day I felt better and got more things done in the day.. So even if the baby was awake I would put her in one of those little chairs by the shower and she loved it. Then I also felt better if I kept up with the house work so I would use the baby front pack. For some reason she loved her car seat and I would put toys on the handle and turn on soft music from the radio and that way if I had to throw in a load of laundry I knew she was safe while doing so. Every baby is different but that is what worked for my kids. I think my favorite part of the day was just holding my baby while I fed her or watching her sleep in my arms.
Best of luck,
Lenci

M. -
Congratulations! Now you are going into another phase of motherhood. I have two boys and was able to take showers without difficulty by putting them (at this age) in a bouncy seat they could be buckled in and lay in. The shower noise is actually soothing for them -- like sounds in the womb -- and often put them to sleep (later it was the excersaucer). Please, do yourself a favor and realize now that you don't have to entertain your child every waking minute...especially at this age! They need to explore on thier own, with eyes, ears, etc. One of my boys, at that age, was perfectly content just staring out the window watching the trees sway in the breeze.

Read a few books (Dr. Sears) to get a better idea of what your child is doing developmentally. There will be plenty of ideas and this is will help you figure out what is age appropriate. You will get the idea as you read and make adjustments. Tummy time is great, so get on the floor with them, put them on your chest or sit on the floor while they are on the bed or couch so you can interact with them. Just be with them and love them...you will figure it out (really). Your attitude also helps. If you anticapate a problem, then there will likely be one. If you go ahead with a good idea, you baby will likely go along too. (often depends on the temperment) Good luck.

In order to assist your precious one in optimal growth and development, at least 20 min. of "tummy time" per day is recommended. "Just putting him down" is a wonderful time of learning for him. Yes, they like stimulating objects, but learning about how to move their own bodies is so critical to their development, and is also a satisfying experience for them.
I never figured out a way to shower while my babies were awake that did not involve some tears(from the babies... I was THRILLED!) Please know that EVENTUALLY you will get to shower without any worries other than "Are they getting on the computer while I'm in here, even though I said not to?" or "Did I just hear my daughter start her shower as I was about to start MY shower?" :) It doesn't always get easier, but at least it gets different! God bless you and Yours!

1) Your baby will just fine in the bouncy seat or bassinette/crib while you take a shower. Try to do it when he's sleepy or in "quiet time" and he'll be okay.
2) Your baby is getting plenty of attention! He needs time on his own to explore his environment and just rest and get used to being here! It sounds like you're a loving mom and so give yourself a break to do some things for yourself. Let him have some time to just look around without constant stimulation - you'll both be happier!!

Best wishes!

Hi M.,
Congratulations on your first baby! It is such a hard and wonderful journey. Well, the advice you get will vary from each Mom.

Here's what we did: we used the sling and the Bjorn a lot during non shower times. While in the shower we put our son in one of those vibrating "chairs" right outside the shower. Sometimes, we would put him down in his crib with the mobile on. I'm all for keeping baby with you as much as possible, but they also won't suffer from being put in a safe place while you chop up dinner or take a shower or just do something that needs two hands. My son usually was fine and if he was upset, my shower would be a short one.

Good luck finding out what works best for your new family!

D.