49 answers

Advice Needed Regarding Pre K That Requires Naps

My almost 5 year-old son just started his new pre-K. He hasn't been taking regular naps for the last year or so, and he does fine without them (he is generally good natured until bedtime). However, his new school requires him to take a 2 hour nap. He is not allowed to read, color, or engage in other quiet activities during this time, like he was at his previous school. He literally has to lie down and do nothing for 2 hours. Yesterday he reported that while he lying there awake, one of his teachers actually asked him to turn around and close his eyes. I feel this time is too long and boring for him, not to mention a waste of his time.

Just to clarify, he turns 5 in November and he is in pre-K, not kindergarten. This is a private school that goes from preschool through early elementary school. Picking him up earlier than mid-afternoon is not an option, as I'm on maternity leave but will be going back to work very soon.

Any advice to get him to nap? Alternatively, is this issue serious enough to warrant moving him to a different school? The school is otherwise very satisfactory.

What can I do next?

So What Happened?™

Well, I spoke to the director and as I expected, she was not willing to budge on their policy. I suggested quiet activities, or transferring my child to an older class during naptime, and even having him nap for one hour, then do quiet activities for the second hour. Everything was met with a resounding "no." Her attitude was that no matter what, it would be disruptive to the other kids. I know for a fact that this is not true, because it was done successfully at my son's previous school. The worst comment she made was that we all have to face things we don't like in our lives, so my son better get used to it!

I know the 2 hour nap policy is there so that two teachers can combine their classes and each one of them can go on a one-hour break. Well, at other schools they have floaters and subs who can keep the teacher to child ratio the same during naptime, but I guess this school is too cheap to do it.

I'm 75% leaning towards taking him out.

Featured Answers

A., my granddaughter also took naps in pre k and then she would be up til 10pm. we just went with the flow, at first she complained but later she was napping along with everyone else. this year she will be in Kindergarten and will get out at noon so no naps! I will have to entertain her and still work from home at the same time. Hopefully we find lots of playdates!

Nobody should be forced to nap. I've never heard of a school that does that. I've only heard of schools that have a "nap room" and a "rest room." You may want to look for a new school. Good luck!

A.,

I would talk to the school and see if they can let him do something else. Even if it was to just lay there and read books and relax. He shouldn't be forced to take a nap if it's not needed. If they aren't going to comply then I would take him out of the school.

More Answers

I consider myself a "nap Nazi" and expect my daughter to nap everyday, no exceptions. But EVEN I think that what the school is doing is ridiculous -- given your child's age. I understand if he's 2 or 3; but at 5-years-old, 2 hours is a lot to expect if they're not sleepy. I say, look for a new school that allows rest time...like quiet reading, coloring etc..

Hi, A.. A lot of kids don't nap by age 5. Could you talk to the school director or principal about quiet time? If your son lays quietly for a few minutes while the other children fall asleep, he should be allowed to read a book or do something else quietly. If he's forced to sleep for two hours, it may disturb his sleep patterns at night and cause other issues for him. If the teacher and/or school administrator are unresponsive, that may be indicate potential unresponsiveness to issues in the future as well.

I can't imagine that the school is requiring him to take a 2 hour nap. I can see if they let him have quiet time while the other kids nap. But forcing him to sit there and lay down for two hours?? That doesn't seem right. Besides most kids that age won't take a nap anymore and certainly won't sit there doing nothing for 2 hours!

I would have a talk with the teacher and school administrator and tell them that your son no longer naps and what if any alternatives they have for that 2 hour period.

I can't see forcing him to take a nap when it isn't needed. Doing so might mess up his nighttime sleep schedule.

If they aren't flexible in doing what your child needs by giving him quiet time with some toys or books instead of napping, I would certainly look at alternative schools to send him to.

From Single Mom of 3 - 2 hours is too long for anyone healthy, child or adult to sleep during the day. 45 min -1 hr is standard. Talk to the school, see if you can come to some kind of an agreement with them...they should know better.

Well, I would think seriously about finding a new school. If your child does not need a nap, you may end up having a lot of conflicts. Is there no way for him to play quietly in another area? If they are not willing to provide you with this option, they are not the right school for your child (at least not at this stage of the game). There is no reason to torture your child and yourself. You may even end up creating a behavior problem which can be tough to fix. It sounds like you know the right thing to do, even if it won't be the easy thing to do. The key is to fit the school to the child, not the child to the school(for this type of issue). Good luck- there are schools out there which offer pre-k without mandating a nap. Have you considered Montessori?

A.,

I would talk to the school and see if they can let him do something else. Even if it was to just lay there and read books and relax. He shouldn't be forced to take a nap if it's not needed. If they aren't going to comply then I would take him out of the school.

That seems like a long time for a nap at that age. My daughter is 3 1/2 and if she takes a two hour nap it interferes with her sleeping at a appropriate bed time. I believe in quiet time, but she does not necessarily sleep. If he is not tired and does not need it then he should not be forced into it. I would probably change schools, but it is whatever you are comfortable with. Good luck! Sorry I could not be more helpful.

I would move him to another school. A 5 year old napping is not a consistent thing and requiring a 5 year old to be quiet and lay still for 2 hours isn't reasonable. Good schools have quiet areas for kids who are too old to nap so they can color or read while the other children are napping. I am appalled at his teacher telling him to turn over and face the wall as if he was being punished. I worked for a place that had a daycare (supposedly Montessori) that ended up kicking my son out for not napping and I noticed that every time I went back there, even after he wasn't there, it was like a military camp. They didn't have a place for kids to go to who were too old to nap so they forced them to lie down and were very cold towards the kids who had a hard time laying still for that long. My son was only 3 1/2 so as soon as I moved him to a better daycare he slept with no problems because it was a loving yet consistent environment. But anyways, most 5 year olds don't nap consistently and that's a fact. I would suggest finding a better school because they are out there. I was lucky enough to find a licensed home daycare with a lady who has been taking classes in early childhood education so she's awesome and our son is loved and happy....he's now 4 1/2 and sometimes he naps and sometimes he doesn't but she doesn't care either way because she knows how to keep him quietly occupied and isn't looking for that time as a break; she knows that there is no break when your job is to care for children. When looking at schools, just drop in unannounced especially at nap time and see how things are going; make a point to meet the teachers to gauge their personalities...after all you are the customer and you should be satisfied with the level of care they are providing. Best wishes.

new school. he is being set up to be a "discipline problem." and 2 hours is toooo long for a five year old!!!

A.-

You might want to check your state laws too. I know here in NV it is a state law saying that if kids attend pre-k for over 5 hrs they are required to have a period of rest. My daughters school is the same way...lunch and play until 12:30...that's when they get out their cots/mats until 2pm. Like another commentor said it probably sounds like its a demand but by the time you wrestle up a bunch of 4-5 year olds and actually get them all down the time will go by fast. I have a friend who's daughter never napped at home but did at school. I bet if you talk to the school director or even the teacher he would be able to have a book or something with him in his cot/mat. Good Luck to you this year will fly by and soon it will be off to the big school!!!!

I used to be a preschool director and one reason why schools have a two hour nap policy is to allow their teachers to get a lunch break. Legally you can have less teachers during nap. So anyway that is why most will have a nap policy and not give another activity for those children who don't nap. Personally our school decides everyone rest for 30 minutes. Then those children who were not asleep would either go play outside in another yard away from the sleepers or go into a unused classroom and do table choices, ie free play. You may want to suggest this to the school. It is not very developmental or appropriate to force all kids to sleep two hours a day. Some kids may only need a short rest some may need longer.

Nobody should be forced to nap. I've never heard of a school that does that. I've only heard of schools that have a "nap room" and a "rest room." You may want to look for a new school. Good luck!

2 hrs long I have never heard such a thing, sure this is just a pre k and not a baby sitters also. How long does he attend this pre k school all day long, if thats the case I could see them for 1 1/2 if this is only 4 hrs which is the norm for pre k school ... you did not say how long he is at pre k this makes a big difference, is this pre k through a school district or a private one.

something is fishy here

Well thats very strange. My daughter went to pre-K and I was told that if they did not want to take a nap they can play, read or color quietly. I really don't think they should force hime. Maybe talking about your concerns with the director will help.

Hi A.-

My first advice is to pick him up before nap time because as you said it is a waste of time and he'd get more out of being home. Does he need to be there all day? Do what you can to get him home or with family or friends. I fthat is not an option, read on...

I work at a preschool and can give more insight to this. While children are up and about the child/teacher ratio is 1:12 for preschool classes according to Ca licensing. This changes at nap time to 1:24 while children are laying down so teachers can get a lunch break. The children must remain on a "bed" but cannot be forced to sleep, obviously. Should they fall aslepp, they cannot be forceably awaken either. It is quite common at my school to have a few munckins off to the side doing activities on their mats.

The sign of a good pre-k focus' on the needs of the child, which this is clearly not doing. According to state licensing, it is a violation of your child's personel rights (which liscensing is very into protecting) to be forced to lay down quietly for 2 hours. He should be allowed to be off to the side (on a mat) with quiet activities like you mentioned. Chances are he's not the only one awake during this period.

Your options if he stays for nap:
--First, check in to see how the teachers treat the children who are awake. Are they nice, understanding, not using threats of punishment, degrading remarks, even bullying them to sleep, etc. If anything negative is happening on the part of tteacher, get him out of there ASAP and call licensing.
--Call your local licensing agency (the school can, and must, give you this number) to double check naptime standards just in case they are different in your area (though I doubt it). Tell the school you know what naptime regulations and what his personel rights are and what you expect to be done to follow this. If they don't comply, file a complaint with licensing. And get your son out because they obviously don't care to follow the rules.
--Check with the school as to the licensing age requirements for another class such as school age. A lot of school age classes allow 5 year olds because of kindergarten. See if he can go into the school age class for naptime.

Forcing a child to lay quiet for 2 hours is not OK and pretty near impossible! The school needs to flexible with this and if they aren't, report them and get him out. If they don't fllow this rule, what other rules are they skipping?

Let me know what happens.

J.

I think it would depend on your child. My boys would have NEVER been able to just lay there for 2 hours! I think I would even go crazy laying and doing nothing for that period of time. I feel that it's unreasonable to not let them look at books or color quietly! If it were my boys and there were other options I would definitely change schools.

Good luck!!

Hi A.,
I agree with you that 2 hours seems like a waste of learning time. I was not aware that a Pre-K class would even have nap time, considering your child will not have any once he is in Kindergarten. That to me shows that they should be preparing for Kindergarten, which means no nap time! A lot of programs have done away with nap time and 2 hours is simply to long! I hope for your sake that they are not running out of activity ideas therefore they have thrown in a 2 hour nap? If you are even questioning it right now, and you and your child are unhappy about it, I would say look for another program that suits your needs because it is just going to keep bugging you! Good luck!

ChloeLux's mom A.

I would switch schools.

Get him out of that school ASAP. He will grow to hate school and it will set up a precedent for his elementary school years of a bad taste in his mouth. That is ridiculous to make them lie still for 2 hours.........Only have him attend until lunch time or change schools............ You are not paying money to give the teachers a break.
All of my grandsons have been in pre K in the past couple of years and a nap is not even suggested (they go 5 days a week from 8:45 until 2:15). They are way too active to be forced to lie still for 2 hours.

A.,

Have you been at the school during nap time? I ask because my daughter/son's school is the same. Since it is all day, they do naps in the two pre-k rooms. Wind down time starts around 12:30, they go to sleep at 1:30 and are up at 2:30. I was wondering if your child's school might be similiar there? Maybe they don't actually have them napping for 2 hours? I volunteer at my kids school a lot and it can take us 30 minutes sometimes to get some of the kids to sleep. Only a few fall asleep quickly, the rest of them need more time and help falling asleep.

I'd say this issue is not big enough to move schools, unless you want to go to a school w/shorter days. The majority of the kids still need a nap, especially if they are going to make it through the day up until bed time w/out "hitting the wall". I am assuming since you didn't mention it that his pre-k program is all day 9-3:30 or something near that?

Again, I doubt he is being asked to sit still for 2 hours. Get more information here, unless you already know this to be a fact (sorry to question you if that is the case). If it is actually less time, then I wouldn't worry. Resting for an hour or so won't hurt him. I notice at my kids school, the few kids who don't sleep, do great to just lay quietly and rest. (Resting is a good habit to get in to young - it doesn't have to be boring and it isn't a waste of time). Then about 30 minutes before the group wakes, those kids get to go out w/an aide or teacher and play outside. Maybe you could ask if they could do the same for your son? If they do require your son to sit still for 2 hours, then talk to the teacher. That seems a bit long. I would think they'd be willing to bend a bit for him. Keep in mind too though that they've been doing this a long time and you'd be surprised how many non-nappers come in and start napping because everyone else is.

My daughter who is almost 6, was the same last year in pre-k. She started out taking naps then spent a good part of the school year not taking naps (which I loved because she crashed by 7pm each night!) Towards the end of the year she was back on napping and to this day (in kindergarten now) when she is not at school she naps. So I have the opposite happening, a child who wants/needs to nap and won't be able to anymore except on the weekends.

Sorry, I didn't mean to ramble.
M.

OMG! my two year old doesnt even take a 2hr nap. That seems cruel esp for the kids who don't need one. Then when he starts getting into trouble for not behaving during nap time. argh! I am with moving schools. But maybe i just am being a little extreme.

Dear A.,

Well, you need to let the school manage his resting time. He probably isn't brow beaten to actually sleep. But he does need the rest. Kids need more rest than parents realize, they are younger and weaker than we are. Maybe that is one reason some children are cranky late in the day. That nap gives you a chance to have a relaxed and reasonable relationship with him in the evening.

I do have a suggestion or two that might help. #1 be sure that you have an early supper he has had a very busy day with lots of expectations, so by the time he gets home he is hungry. I used to run a day care center and we had a 3:00 small fruit snack for the children still waiting to go home. Knowing that the working parents probably did not have dinner ready early.

#2 Speaking of expectations. Just think now, he has certain things and behaviors that are proper in his own home, and then there are certain rules and expectations of him in the day care and Kindergarten. Remember this is his first year at 'real' school, and the curriculum in Kindergartens now is more advanced than it was in the past. O.K.? O.K.! C. N.

oh yes, we had parents complaining about rest time in the school that I ran too. It is an old story and a new one too. But remember, the people who run that school WENT to school to learn how to teach and handle young children.

Hi A.,
I assume you have already spoken to the school about this. As a former pre-school and elementary teacher I find this outrageous! In my experience nap times (and especially ones this long) are in place to allow the adults to get other work done. If the school is not able to provide a more individualized program for your chld, this is not the best school for him. He obviously has different needs than his peers and they are not being addressed.

I don't know where you live, but I am sure you have other choices as far as schooling. If you are anywhere near Culver City, or if it's not too much of a drive for you, look up Play Mountain Place. It's the oldest free school in the country.

Any which way you go, just remember you are your child's biggest advocate! Good luck.

As a preschool director, I would say that a manditory 2 hour nap is unusual. Most schools require a 1 hour rest period, and that seems more reasonable to me. You can't require a child to sleep, obviously, but to lie still and rest for 1 hour is doable. I would require that the children rest, not read or do other activities, as that would disrupt the other children's rest. I would imagine the schools reason for the long nap is that the student/teacher ratio changes at nap time, and they can utilize their staff differently, allowing for less staff with more children. It will be up to you whether or not you and your child can live with this extended nap period.

A., my granddaughter also took naps in pre k and then she would be up til 10pm. we just went with the flow, at first she complained but later she was napping along with everyone else. this year she will be in Kindergarten and will get out at noon so no naps! I will have to entertain her and still work from home at the same time. Hopefully we find lots of playdates!

I think that's crazy. A lot of kids drop their nap by three... as horrible as that is ;). Switch schools or talk to someone in charge.

Even my 2-year-old only naps for one hour a day. My 5-year-old stopping napping around 3 years old. If he naps now he doesn't want to go to sleep at night.

I don't think 5 years olds really nap much, if at all. Our son does have a quiet period in the afternoon, but it is filled with reading or playing with crafts or simple stuff. No running around, just relaxing.

You have to decide if you want your son napping during the day. 2 hours sounds like a really long time. I agree with the poster who said take him home because he'll get more out of being at home than napping when he doesn't need to.

To me it seems very odd that the school would require this. Sounds to me like they are not flexible with regards to the needs of the child. That by itself would raise a red flag for me...

good luck,
B.

Hi A.!
What a bummer the school is so strict about such a thing as a nap for ANY age child, let alone a 4 or 5 year old! I'm a big believer in children getting adequate rest but it seems absurd to FORCE someone into a 2 hour nap. My daughter's pre school (since age 3) had an optional 2 hr nap at which time non nappers were taken to the playground and then had quiet time back in class (puzzles, reading, coloring, etc), they learned a valuable lesson on how to be considerate to the children who were sleeping, too. Now, even parents who really wanted their little ones to nap were told after 30 minutes if the child had not fallen asleep they would then be sent to join the non nappers for quiet activities.... I think this is because making someone (a child no less) lay still for 2 hours when they can't fall asleep is similar to torture! I know it seems rash but, if the school is not budging on something like this they might be a bit forceful in other areas as well, regardless if this is their only downfall, I'd say your son will not be enjoying his time spent there... It will probably set the tone for the whole day and bum him out. If I were you I'd look else where... I know it's time consuming, but probably worth it in this case.
Best of Luck to you!
M.

Those "nap" rules sounds pretty stiff... a child certainly cannot be expected to stay still/quiet/and in a prone position for 2 whole hours!

MOST schools allow a "quiet time" for the children that cannot fall asleep. Talk with the teacher... she how she reacts, what her "personal" rules are for HER classroom. Often, this may be the "school" rules...but a teacher "may" adjust to variations.

Perhaps your son will adapt to this and eventually learn how to nap... but maybe not. In my daughter's Kinder class... about 98 percent of them would fall asleep...but the teacher also would let the non-sleepers have quiet time. This is normal and acceptable.

Some schools have rules like this in the beginning... to get the kids in a "routine" and adept at the "rules." Then, as the year progresses...they may get more flexible. But, this school sounds rigid, if this is truly "nap" time rules.

On the other hand, my friend's daughter was at a school with those same strict "nap" rules... their daughter HAD TO lie down no matter what and not move and was not allowed to do anything else. It was as her Mother said, "like torture..." and her daughter complained about it. She ended up taking her girl out of this school and placed her in a school she felt more comfortable about.

Each school has different styles/philosophies...some highly structured and rigid... some more flexible and creative and amendable. So, see what "style" is best for you as a Parent and for your child.

My daughter is also 5 years old (almost 6 in a few months), and she still naps at home, after school. She says she likes to nap. So similar to the other poster. She is in 1st grade now.. but in Kinder, they did have "nap" time, for 1 hour, but also quiet time for those who didn't nap. If anything, it does get them into a good routine to nap... at this age it does benefit them still. As a Mom, I am GLAD my girl still naps at her age. It really benefits her... a day at school does tire them.

Good luck,
Susan

A.,

If I were in your situation I'd ask if there was another area he could go to because of his situation. It may be necessary get your pediatrian to write a note and then they have to adhere to it. If your son isn't required to take naps otherwise then I think it will be difficult to "make" him take one at the new school. However, they may have the kids so active that he will want to take a nap. Also, when he makes friends with kids at his new school he may want to lay down to be with them. I think it may have to be a wait and see. Lastly, if the school does not provide an alternate setting for your son, providing he does not take naps, I would probably move him to another school. I suppose I'd have to check into school boundaries (if there are any) so I knew if I could move my child to another school.

M. P

If you like the school, I would say to give it a little bit of time and see how he does. He may very well start to nap again. I remember taking naps at school when I was in kindergarten, I don't remember how long the nap was (that was 30 years ago!). My 3 1/2 year old still takes a 3 hour nap everyday. And if he has had a busy morning, he is usually the one asking me if it is time to go take a nap yet. When he hasn't had any activity in the morning, sometimes he won't sleep, but appreciates the quiet time in his bed (and he is a very social guy). A full day in school is a long day for a little person. I think it would be great for your son to have a break from all of the activity, he may appreciate it. Give it some time then talk to the teacher and see how he is doing. If the naptime is a problem, then you could look for a different school.

Get him in a school that doesn't demand things, is more in tune with children than their rules. That seems like a form of torture to me! I would get him out fast and tell the Director why.

I wish I was forced to lay down for two hours! lol.

Hello A.,
Wow - 2hr nap?? My 4yr old just started summer school which he will continue to Pre-K in Sep. He is required to take a nap also. But his teacher is letting him read, or play "quietly" if he does not want to nap. He has not napped for the last 2yrs and I was concerned at first. Come to find out the first 2 days he read himself to sleep! and now sleeping everyday. Maybe your son will adapt to the new schedule. But I find not letting him read is harsh. See how he does in the first 2 wks, if it does not work out you might want to pick him up at nap time. Good luck.

I own a family childcare center. I speaking from the other side of the equation. Nap time is the only time I get to make sure my other tasks are done (i.e. paperwork, dishes, basic cleaning and yes even a little rest from having 6 - 8 children run around all day). I do let the older ones read books during this time as long as they can remain on their mats and are quiet. I also wait to let them do this until the younger ones are asleep, as the younger ones feel that they should be allowed to read during this time also. Unfortunately, the youngers do not have the capasity to sit for that long with napping. I do think the teachers in your son's class are going to the extreme in trying to make him sleep, often this causes more frustration for the teachers than it does for the children. It's a tough choice to make as I know you want what is best for you son. If it were me I would check into other places, but I can tell you from experience that in many quality child care facilities nap time is sacred.

Hi A.! I am speaking on the side of the school. I have worked at schools in which naps are required by the state if the school is open all day. I don't know if that is a school in which your son attends but that is why some schools require them. It would be nice to let older kids rest for some time and then let them up but it is a state requirement and if someone from state comes to inspect during nap time the school could get fined. I know how hard it is and if it is that hard for your son then maybe you should find a center that does not have nap time.

Do you have any friends with children or a relative that could pick him up just after lunch prior to the naps and keep them until you pick him up? Who is taking care of your baby after you are off maternity leave? Would they be willing to pick him up? I took care of children for three years for parents who had them in all day care and they did not need or want the naptime. I had a son a little younger who no longer napped and he looked forward to the company. I don't understand the schools that insist on naps. I think it should be optional if the child has stopped naps at home and has an early bedtime. I would be concerned that if he did get use to naps, it would mess up your bedtime schedule and also be a problem in K when he didn't have naps. Also you certainly want him to enjoy and not resent school. I hope you are able to find a good solution.
H.

Who is taking car of your baby after you are off maternity leave? Would they be willing to pick him up?

Are you in California? When my youngest was in pre-k two years ago, the law was 30 minutes of quiet time. The nappers went in one room and the quiet time kids went into another and looked at books or wore headphones and listened to books. My older son couldn't handle it, and our pre-k also had a Kindergarten program, so even though he wasn't technically old enough, it was private and they could let him in. He got a head start on his Kindergarten school and because it was the same place as the preschool, I think the price difference was only around $500 and no naps and no quiet time requirements. He turned 5 at the end of December.

Those in charge (teachers) should normally lay him down see how he adjusts and if he cannot take a nap they should quietly take him to another room so he can do quiet activities without waking the other children. I would seriously think about changing schools if it is a MUST for taking naps. Children have different schedules and teachers need to be accommodating.

i had this same problem. It was so hard for us. I had to pull her out so she could enjoy school, she was moved and spent the rest of the year learning and growing, and most mornings she would ask are we going to the nap school? I would say no and she would jump for joy. The nap school was a great school but there was so much anxiety that caused her to hate school. Not a way i wanted to start a new school journey. She is very exited about kindergarten.


I see that you can not pick him up half day most public schools have an after school program that are an extension of the pre k. I had to leave the privet school also, more scare for me than her. Good luck!!

Hello. I think a mandatory 2 hour nap is unacceptable for a pre-school, and I am a huge fan on naps. On the weekends, my daughter naps very well - nearly 2 hours, but during the week at daycare, they are pleased if she sleeps for 30+ minutes. It is fine to require every child to lay day for quiet time, but not for 2 hours. They should have quiet activities he can do in the time between when he wakes up and when the others wake up.

If they are insistent, I would consider a new place. If you are in the Pasadena area, I recommend Firehouse - it is a pre-k and has a kindergarten.

Good luck!

If the pre-school is that inflexible about naptime, then yes, I would definitely change schools. What a convenient thing for the teachers in that school, to have all of the kids quiet and napping for what probably amounts to 1/3 of the school day. Not all kids need to nap at that age and if they cannot respect the needs of different children, I would question the respectability of the school.

I had my son in a day care around the age of 4. It was really nice, the lady worked out of her home that was one block away from my home and the price was moderate.

My husband works a goofy schedule so sometimes he would pick up my son around different times. One day, he picked him up around 11am and he told me all the kids were laying down sleeping. The next day he picked him up around 2pm and he was sleeping again! Or at least trying to sleep. He threw away naps like a parking ticket at the age of 2. So she would get on my DH that he will not cooperate with "nap time". We explained this to her and she didn't care. She just assumed my kid had ADHD and wanted him tested! Come to find out, my DH would be sneaky when picking him up and noticed her computer on at some misc website. One day her daughter took care of signing out my son while she sat on her butt surfing the web. No wonder why every time I picked up my kid all she talked about was going back to nursing! I pulled him out of there and found a new place. She was just being lazy!

So I would suggests to you to go talk to the head honcho of that place and find out just whats going on. Try to work out some kind of compromise and if you can't, take your business elsewhere. Don't push naps. If he is tired he will sleep. There is nothing wrong if he behaves and stays quiet while the other kids sleep. Rest time does not mean sleep. If he is doing something kind of relaxing activity guess what he his relaxing thus he is resting. I would really hate to see you go though what I did about accusing your kid of ADHD just because he's not tired!

I believe that there is some type of state law that requires an all day pre-school to provide nap-time for all children. However, I am not sure about how long that law indicates the nap should be. Two hours seems unreasonable for a child who clearly has passed the napping stage and even more unreasonable that he cannot at least look at books. I would talk to the director kindly about your concern and if there is no change you should look for a pre-school that works best for your son. Good luck.

I am assuming that in Sept he will be starting kindergarten????. At age 5 he should be in kindergarten. i would either switch schools or TELL (not ask) them that your son is too old for naps and that you suggest that they do not force it and it is unexceptable. Maybe go to the director and have a little discussion about forcing 5 year olds to nap for 2 hours. I am sure you will get your point across.

good luck

OK - have to respond to this A.. I have 3 daughters and all of them went to the same preschool (not sure if it's the same as yours). None of them liked to nap, but the first 2 got through that 2 hour nap period without TOO much complaining although I know they hated it and didn't sleep. But my last little one (she's 8 now) HATED naptime and consequently hated going to school although I know she liked everything else. The thought of those 2 hours were enough to ruin her entire preschool days/memories and I am STILL kicking myself that I did not pull her out sooner and find a school that would accomodate the kids who absolutely did not sleep. 2 hours to be still and quiet is WAY too long for a little kid (me too!!! - I'd go nuts) and when the teachers enforce this quiet behavior and "punish" the kids for being restless it's SO unfair. (Yes, I really have not forgiven myself for leaving her in this school that was otherwise very nice). When I finally put her in The Boulevard School (on Fallbrook in Woodland Hills) for a summer of camp before starting kindergarted, she was ELATED and couldn't wait to go every day as they did not require napping. At the time they also told me that if the younger ones didn't want to nap, I think they were allowed to read or something, which is fine. Anyway. Listen to your child and if you think 2 hours is too long for him to lay there quiet, believe me, you're right. It's only for the teachers' convenience that they don't have alternate quiet activites for the kids who don't sleep. Good luck!!

That is the craziest thing I've ever heard! Change schools. It is unrealistic to expect your son to be still for 2 hours. Kindergarten is normally a half day. This must be a day care type of pre-k? All day long? It sounds as if the teachers want a 2 hour break in the middle of the day. I remember having rest time in kindergarten and first grade - about 20 minutes of lying down on mats. But none of my four kids went to schools that did that. You need to either arrange for your son to do something else during nap time, or find a different school. Good luck!

I had the same problem with my daughter and preschool last year. In the long run, she learned to self monitor in positive ways. She learned to be quiet when she needed to be and it also helped her calm down and entertain herself when needed. I was worried during the year and had my share of discussions with the director but it was incredibly helpful for Kindergarten where she had to wait in other ways...

WOW! I know this was posted a long time ago, but I hope that you've decided to check out other schools. 2 hours of rest, when a child doesn't sleep, is absurd!! I'm a preschool teacher of about 17 years and have worked at two different centers. At both of these centers, nap time started at one o'clock, and we sat with the children (patting their backs if they wanted us to) and after 45 minutes, (I believe that's a state requirement...NOT 2 hours!), the children who are awake, go into another classroom to play quietly for the rest of naptime. For some children, even 45 minutes is tough, but we always felt it was good for them to rest. We didn't allow them to have books or things like that on their cots, but they could bring a soft toy from home. Most of the time, they enjoyed the quiet time and it was never a problem. I hope you found a good resolution for you and your son!

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