<sigh> I thought I had wirtten this for a minute! Actually, my husband isn't an atheist, but he never mentions prayer, God, or anything, but was raied Lutheran. I don't even think he knows where he stands. I'm a non-practicing Catholic. We have 3 kids. We sent our first son to Christian preschool and he came home with all kinds of whack ideas. "God made my bike. God makes everything." Ok, back up Nellie.
Here's where we are. We read a children's bible, which told 1/2 the story and I found it very lame. We just bought a Bible Story book and are reading that, but I explain it right then and there, so there is some common sense going on. We've been to our friend's Christian church a few times, gone to church with my SIL, but we don't go regularly. I remember going to church like it was torture. I didn't get anything out of it until I was about 10.
Our oldest is 7 now and we discuss God, read stories, the bible, etc. We are just deciding to get into it a little more, but we aren't forcing it. We are planning on getting ALL of our kids baptized this next year - Catholic and then they can get re-baptised if they want, as adults, as anything they want. I just want it something that they have in their lives, but I don't want it to be so intense that they can't think for themselves.
My dad was raised Mormon and never went back to church after he was 17. I've never heard him pray and his take on religion is pretty harsh...but he's at least honest about it. I did appreciate that growing up. He's very clear that religion and spirituality are not the same things. My mom raised us Catholic. I got baptised, first communion and at 16, confirmed. I never really went back to church after that. I mean, I do, when I feel the desire to go, but it's not for confession, or for forgiveness. It's almost like I feel the need to reconnect, like calling a good friend that I haven't seen in a while.
I think your child has a very lucky situation. Your children will have a good balance and will figure it out for themselves later - we always do! I think a religious foundation can be really good. I say, thank your husband for at least knowing where he is, rather than pretending and being a hypocrite. I think it's great that he will have that religious relationship with you. Your children will probably always come to you for religious questions and that's ok. My husband doesn't answer questions like, "How does the babby get in the uterus." I do. Your husband doesn't have to answer, "Am I going to hell for lying." You do.
I just had this conversation with an adult where her parents sort of intorduced religion, but not really, as a 40 year old woman, she wishes she had more of it and found more comfort in going to church. That's what prompted me to really sit down and think about it and what I am doing for my children.
I think you raised an excellent question....and celebrate that you and your husband are different and will have different takes on things.