Advice for Getting Your 6-Week Old to Sleep

Does he spit up a lot? It could be reflux. When you rock him he's semi-upright and then you lay him down and the reflux comes up and burns his throat. Try elevating the head of his bed a little to see it that helps.
Otherwise, another thing that worked great with my kids is swaddeling them. Then they feel like they are back inside you. Take a nice blanket and swaddle him tight, like they did in the hospital, before putting him to bed. I know it seems SO uncomfortable to be tied up like that but they love it because it's cozy and warm.
Best Wishes,
J.
Mom to 4, going on 5 through another adoption.

T.,

6 weeks is plenty old to let your baby put himself to sleep. The sooner he learns, the easier it will be. With baby #1, we did this at 6 weeks and it took about a week for her to learn to put herself to sleep. (Night 1 she screamed for 45 minutes. It lessened every night until night 6 she only cried a couple of minutes.)

With baby #2 we started at 4 weeks and it only took 3-4 nights. With baby #3 and #4, I made sure they were putting themselves to sleep from the day they were born and they never had to cry themselves to sleep. Notice the pattern? The earlier the easier.

I know it is convenient to rock your baby to sleep in the short haul. But in the long term, you can have a 3, 4, 5 YEAR old who still wakes up at night, wants to come in bed with mom & dad and insists you stay with him until he falls asleep - which can take 30-60 minutes every night. And babies who put themselves to sleep will put themselves BACK to sleep much faster in the middle of the night so they drop the nighttime feedings quicker. (All 4 of mine were sleeping 11-12 hours a night by 3 months at the latest.)

If you want to teach your baby to put himself to sleep, there are a couple of ways to do it. We did it a little differently with each kid depending on personality and what they preferred.

1. Lay them down sleepy, full and dry. (Don't keep them up too late or avoid naps because when babies are OVER tired, they can't settle down and go to sleep.)
2. Let them cry. Either go in with increasingly longer increments, (5 min, 10 min, 15 min, 20 min) or go in every 15 minutes or don't go in at all. It depends on your kid. Some are soothed by the parents coming in, others just get more upset.
3. If you go in, just pat the tummy, talk soft and settle them down. Leave the lights off. I had one kid who did better if I picked him up - he couldn't calm down otherwise - but the other just got more upset when I picked her up because she thought she had won the battle and was getting out of the crib. When I laid her back down, it was worse than before I went in. So you kind of have to see what works best.
4. Don't feel guilty and wait it out. Prepare for a 2 week battle that lasts 1-2 hours per night. Then you should be pleasantly surprised because they rarely battle that hard at this age. If you wait until they are older you can expect a 1-2 month battle that can go on for hours every night.
5. We found out this one the hard way....Don't let them frequently fall asleep in the car or in the swing past 2-3 months of age. I know it is convenient, but they lose their ability to put themselves to sleep and then you have to start all over again.

Good luck,
S.

T.,

My youngest is 14 weeks old and we bought a swaddling blanket for her after she came home and she would go to sleep on her own. We bought the cheaper Kiddopotamus for $9.99 opposed to the Halo ones for $19.99 (Babies R Us). She loves being swaddled at night and we still wrap her up before bed. When she was younger she would take a nuk to go to sleep. Now she doesn't want it to go to sleep at nights.

Good luck....As a mom to 3, I can tell you things will get better!!!

Find whatever works for you, it may not be by the book or what the doctor recommends.

I know some use a babyswing, carseat at night.

When my daughter was around 6-8 weeks she suddenly didn't sleep well at bedtime and a neighbor swadled my daughter and we propped her in her boppie pillow in her crib so she wasn't flat but elevated. That was the only way my daughter would sleep. I was so nervous and exhausted I had called a neighbor over to help. My daughter had reflux so this made her feel alot better too.

I feed my little one who is 5 weeks on 1-31 at about 10/10:30pm and rock him to sleep. and then i put him down in his bassinet. I did the same thing with my now 3 year old and rocked him until he was about 6 months old. I dont see anything wrong in rocking him yet.

My son is 17 months and I still rock him occassionally. The thing is, you do what's comfortable, but not what wrecks it for leaving him with someone else. There is no magic age. When daycare or sitters (grandparents) put him down he has always just gone right to sleep (after maybe 2 months?), so I'm not worried it will create bad habits. I LOVE that time with him, and know it won't last long enough! And don't be afraid to put him to sleep in a carseat or bouncy chair if that's all that works. People will tell you a million don'ts, but you do what works, what you want, and what lets you get sleep! When they are that little you CANNOT spoil them! And it will most likely change completely once you figure it out anyways!! Good luck!

Hi T. -
I empathize with your plight for sleep - those first few months are really difficult. Both of my children also were rocked to sleep and I questioned at which time could they start falling alseep on their own - and the answer seems to be different with each child. You've got to trust your own instinct and do what is in the best interest for your family. If rocking him until he's sound asleep and then placing him in the bassinet works better - then go for it and enjoy that extra time holding him - because the time will come (too quickly) when he'll outgrow wanting to be rocked to sleep. If he's waking up after that - there are lots of things to try which may help. Good Luck - post again if you want suggestions on different techniques to try. Enjoy your little one.

Congrats on the new baby!!! Personally, I think the sooner you can get your child to fall asleep on their own, the better. As long as your son is in a "sleepy state" and doesn't cry when you put him down, I think it's fine. Six weeks is however too young to let him "cry it out." As soon as he starts to cry, pick him up and try again.

Every child is soooo different. For most babies, 6 weeks is not at all too early to put them down awake. In fact, I've heard from most moms that it's better to start early.
Having said that, my first WOULD NOT put himself to sleep until he was a toddler. He hated his crib and would scream until he threw up, and then scream some more, if we put him in there awake. He did not successfully put himself to sleep until we put him in a toddler bed at about 14 months.
My second (currently 13 months) is a pro at going to sleep on his own. We've even weaned him from a bottle (his comfort) and he still does very well.
Some babies do better if there is white noise (i.e. a fan or humidifier) or soft music playing (something my oldest loved). Others need a night light (we've done that the few times when my baby had a hard time).
A bath and swaddling are great ideas. You can try a pacifier if you haven't already. Definitely keep trying to put him down awake. It's easier to establish good habits when they're young and incredibly difficult to break bad ones when they're older...trust me.
Just go with your gut instinct and do what works best for your family. Good luck!

No, it is not too early to be putting him down in a "sleepy state". I have a two year old son and I have never rocked him to sleep in his entire life. But, every kid is different. We started putting my son in his crib at 5-6 weeks old. He started sleeping through the night at 7 and a half weeks old. When I would put him down for the night he use to do the same exact thing. He would cry and move around for 30 minutes or so and then he'd finally fall asleep. But, my mistake was that I wasn't rocking him. Once I started rocking him and singing to him he'd fall right asleep once I layed him down. I sang the same songs for the same amount of time each and every night. I think the singing always calmed him and his stomach down. And it also always let him know that it was bedtime. Before he started sleeping through the night he'd wake up and want his feedings early (you are suppose to feed them every 3 to 4 hours). It was VERY frustrating, but they grow out of it. By the time he's five months old food won't be as important. How much napping is he doing? How long is he awake before you put him down for the night? His little stomach could also be upset, so make sure you have all burps out of him. And also, some kids have acid reflux. Well anywayz, I hope I helped.

We also had problems with our daughter falling asleep on one of us and then trying to transfer her to her co-sleeper w/o waking her up. We found it worked well to put her in her co-sleeper once she was drowsy and then to hold her Nuk for her (since she couldn't keep it in herself at that age) while putting the other hand on her chest. The comfort of the body contact helped her fall asleep and we didn't have to worry about moving her at all once she fell asleep. We never swaddled our daughter, but I know this technique works well for a lot of babies so I would give that a try too. Good luck!! You're almost out of "the fog." :)

Hi T.,

Is it cool in your house? Maybe it's the change from warm mama to cool bed that is startling him. I have known some mom's who warmed the babies bed with a heating pad before laying them down. Just test it with your hand to make sure it isn't too warm (my heating pad gets pretty hot). That might help. I know another Mom who put one of her t-shirts (that she had worn) over the bassinet pad so that the bed smelled like her.

Also, you might try the trick suggested in another post of keeping a hand on him. That worked for my son (now 14 months). I had him in a pack and play (with an infant bassinet) right by my bed so I could keep a hand on him while we both slept. That helped in the first few weeks.

Good luck, and know that it will get better with time.

J.
Mom to Charlie (4-24-05) and Joey (12-4-06)

At 6 weeks old, you can put him down awake/drowsy, but don't let him cry. He won't understand. What always owrked for us was to give a warm bath, nurse, swaddle, then lay down in bed, we'd hang out there for a few minutes rubbing thier belly and talking softly.

The quicker you put him down the quicker you will start sleeping. We had the same issue with our son. He would eat for an hour and then we would have to rock for another hour or two! At five weeks I decided enough was enough. His new routine is eat, wake time and then put to bed. It took a couple of days for him to get used to being put down but the point is...he adapted! I suggest reading "On becoming Babywise". That book has saved my life!! At five weeks he started going 8-8 1/2 hours at night - without rocking to sleep. They need to learn to soothe themselves and not depend on you. Believe me, the transitional days will be hard. A lot of crying for 10 minutes, go in and soothe, crying 10 more minutes and then one day...he will stop crying and just go to sleep. Trust me...I have the happiest baby and mommy is completely rested as well. (I didn't have a happy baby for the first 5 weeks)

My youngest is 10 weeks. I have found that she likes a heavier blanket. I'm not sure if it makes her feel more secure or like she's being held. I do have her sleeping with me for now but she falls asleep on her own and sleeps all night. I don't find anything wrong with rocking if that is what he likes. Right now, it's important that you get your sleep too! Good luck!

Hey there!! A book that was really well recommended is "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth. I gives advice by baby's age, which is helpful. I know many people that found this book helpful.

Is nighttime the only time he sleeps flat, or does he nap there, too? It might be worth checking into reflux if it's related to lying flat. #2 had reflux but it was harder to diagnose because he did spit up much--the acid just stuck in his throat.

T.-

Get the book "The Baby Whisperer" by Traci Hogg...it talks about E.A.S.Y, tanking up, and dream-feeding to help your baby sleep through the night. E=eat, A=activity, S=sleep, and Y=time for you.
You follow that pattern throughout the day and then towards the night time you feed around 5-6ish, give a bath, and then feed again around 7-8ish and put to bed. You then do a dream feed, where you don't wake them up, burp them, or change them and then put them right back to bed.
The earlier you start, the better off you'll be. It didn't work too well for me in the beginning, but my daughter is now 3 months old and sleeping from 8:30-4:00 with a dream feed at 10-11pm.
It's worth a shot! Good luck...

I am the mother of 2 gorgeous girls (4.5 and 23 mo.) and I had a similar routine as yours when they were little babies. They would eat a bottle at 9:00 or 10:00 pm and fall asleep in my arms. I would have to carefully put them in the crib and walk away quietly. That was the only way they would fall asleep. I never did the rocking thing, but I would not worry about it yet. I just remember someone telling me that you cannot spoil, hold, rock, cuddle with a new baby too much. That is a critical bonding time and I completely agree! I would not even worry about it until the bottle or nursing days are over. Enjoy the babies while they are little. And that sleep time will come back again. Those nights are frustrating, but they do get better. Just keep laying him in that bassinette and remember that crying does not hurt him. It is much harder on you!! Maybe he does not like the bassinette and would prefer the crib. Both my girls did not like the basinette and they were both in the crib by about 6 weeks if not earlier. BTW...they both sleep like champs now! Good luck...

I'd give him another 6 weeks before starting that business. I started a bedtime routine with my kids when they were 3 and a half months. Then came napping by themselves and sleeping through the night much later.

I also very much recommend Weissbluth's "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child." We followed his book with our first and are planning on following it with our second in a month or so (he's 4 weeks now). It provides very concrete guidance based on age. It was a savior for us with our first one! Good luck, E.