ADD Or Bad Habits?

Karate will help him a lot. Talk to his instructor, explain his lack of focus and constant need to move. He may have some ideas. Martial Arts helps kids learn to focus, the forms require a lot of concentration and the right/left punching and kicking actually help the right/left brain energies connect. I do think though he needs to be in class more than once a week. He needs 3-4 days a week in class to get the full benefit of his training.
He may be ADD he may also just be a little boy who needs to MOVE. He needs to be active less sitting and more bike riding, playing outside etc. It seems as though the new definition for little boy is ADD or ADHD when all they need to to run. Kids need to use their big muscles and get exercise.

I would take him to a physician who specializes in children with behavioral issues and have him evaluated. While it could be just a case of laziness it could be other issues, like ADD or ADHD and there is medication to help. The playing with objects within his reach reminds me of my son who was diagnosised with ADHD at that age. While my son was allergic to the meds but 99 percent of the children will benefit from the medication.

Even if you find out that your son does not have ADD/ADHD, you can still use some of the useful techniques that I find work with kids who have those diagnoses (I have 1 with ADHD and 1 with ADD - one is on meds for ADHD one is on meds but not for ADD). It seems like his brain is "atwitter" and he is having trouble with the "butt to chair" concept. As a veteran of both of these issues :) my suggestion is to handle how you give expectations and instructions a little differently. I will give you an example of what I do:

Dinner time: Before we start dinner, I explain what the "rules" are during dinner - no leaving the table, no bothering others, etc (or whatever your rules are). When I explain the rules, I put my face very close to theirs and cup my hand underneath their chin and we have to make eye contact while I am explaining the expectations. Then I have them repeat what I am expecting. I end this with the consequence (if the rules aren't followed, you will/won't get X).

Instructions: I will use the technique for giving two/three step instructions the same way as above (close face/eye contact/etc) and then I will say "what am I asking you to do?" They repeat it back and then I end with "you are only to do the two/three things I asked you to do. I expect that you will not (stop, play with something else, etc) until you have done exactly what I have asked you to do. Do you understand?"

I know that this seems like a very "dumbed down" approach, especially given that your child is very bright. However, focus for some kids, has to be learned and can be challenging. By making it as easy and error free as possible, you are increasing his chance to learn focus.

I will second other's opinions about the vision testing (many kids have been accidentially diagnosed ADD/ADHD when it was a vision tracking issue) and also having an OT evaluation (not through the school). There are left brain/right brain issues that can be addressed successfully through listening therapy at OT.

Finally, if warranted, don't write off the value of medication. There are a number of folks who do not believe in medicating their child and to each his own. However, as a mom to a kid with ADHD (very, very severe), even he will not miss a single med because he knows how he feels/behaves without them and doesn't like it.

Good luck!

Before you look into ADHD, I would suggest that you take your son to an optometrist or pediatric optometrist that specializes in vision therapy for a thorough vision exam. While he may have passed EYESIGHT exams at school or at an optometrist, he still may have VISION problems dealing with focusing/eyes adjusting to changes in distances, eye cooperation, eye movement, and other problems. My daughter exhibited some of the same behaviors and her teachers suggested that she might have ADHD. We fought it for as long as we could until WE gave in and diagnosed her with mild ADHD (I say WE as she was diagnosed stricty on OUR answers to the Connors survey). She took the lightest dosage of medicine for a little over 1 year and complained that the medicine made her feel agitated which told me she did not have ADHD. She also started voicing concerns about not being able to see certain things and started realizing that she saw things differently from others even though she continued to pass eye exams. When I read an article about vision therapy on this website, I took her to be tested and sure enough, it was vision problems all along! After researching it, I learned that many, many kids are misdiagnosed with ADHD when it is in fact vision problems. It is frustrating to me that teachers and schools are not informed of this as they should suggest that parents look into vision problems before concluding a child has ADHD. Look at your post and see how many times you said your son doesn't take the time to LOOK, and said that he mixes up addition and subtraction signs, spelling, lacks neatness sometimes. As far as behavior, it would be hard to concentrate and focus in a blurry unfocused world! I wonder if he gets up to sharpen his pencil or fidgets, when his teacher is instructing with something he can't see (i.e. the board, a worksheet)? Look into vision therapy first! Some professional athletes do it just to improve their game, so the worst that could happen to your son as he would improve his athletic hand/eye coordination - far less consequences than an ADHD diagnosis and meds. My daughter is doing vision therapy now and improving!

I think he sounds like a TYPICAL 7 year old BOY. My son is in first grade, will be 7 in March, and I see a lot of similarities in your post to my son! I think it's just harder for boys to be sitting and concentrating for long stretches of time. My son is disorganized yet gets all A's, tests very high in math & language and is in advanced groups for that. I have not heard anything other than he is a model student at school, but at home--fidget, leaps from O. thing to another, etc.

As the parent of a child with ADHD, I would encourage you to talk to your son's pediatrician for a referral to a psychiatrist, who can do an evaluation. Kids with ADHD tend to be quite smart, but lack impulse control and the ability to focus. The behaviors you have described are ones we experienced with our son before he started medication (which made all the difference in the world while keeping his spirited personality). If he does have ADHD, his behaviors are out of his control and there are things you can do to help him thrive at home and at school.

Good luck!

Attention Deficit is a possibility. Another possibility is Sensory Processing Disorder. ADD can be treated by meds or changes in diet. Sensory Processing is treated by Occupational Therapy. My daughter actually had both. She spent a few years in OT and on meds for ADD. The sensory issues, while not gone, she has learned how to effectively handle them and no longer receives OT. For her, she was also able to give up the meds, though this does take a lot of work from her. She would rather at this stage put in the extra work and not take meds (she is 13). When she was 7, which is when she was diagnosed, she really needed the meds to get her on track.

I would have him assessed by a behavoiral ped or psych. Someone who specializes in this type of thing. BUT I would also have him IQ and achievement tested. Gifted children can mimic the behavoir of ADD or ADHD if they are in an unengaging environment. The algebra comment set off for an alarm for me. I have a child that was never accused of being ADHD, but was more than willing to cause problems in his 1st grade classroom. He hit the ceiling of the school's IQ screening test. He is now homeschooled and focuses for hours at material at his own level. Kids can be gifted AND ADHD, but it's a good thing to have the whole picture before you make any decisions about medications or his current schooling environment. Good luck!

I'm also a first grade teacher and here are some things that I would also want to know.

Questions to consider...

- What are his favorite activities at school?
- Does he focus on activities that he is interested in?
- You mention play time, but does he have a physical outlet to expend energy (e.g. soccer, gym class, etc.)?
- How much screen time (tv, dvds, computer, D.S., etc) does he get every week?
- If a reward is involved, does that increase his motivation to participate, be attentive, or finish his work?
- What consequences are in place for not doing chores, completing homework, etc.
- What does your pediatrician say?
- What comments did his kindergarten or preschool teacher have regarding work habits? (e.g. is this new or has always been happening)
- What messages are you sending your child? Are you excusing his behavior by blaming the curriculum for not being challenging or interesting enough?

Often adults forget that work habits need to be taught. We need to teach kids how to sit and focus. We need to teach children how to pay attention when someone is speaking. We need to teach kids how what good work and study habits look like. Be very explicit with 6 & 7 year olds about what is appropriate behavior and have follow through.

Sounds like a TYPICAL 7-year old boy. I'm glad his school incorporates the hands-on learning, because I'm sure that's where he can succeeed. School hasn't changed much in 100 years and I wish it would--essentially, we expect kids to go from home/preschool/kindergarten to sitting in chairs and desks most of the time. I'm also willing to bet that when he's outdoors, he is one creative, inquiry-driven kid. So as you might have guessed, I lean against medication to subdue one's natural learning style!

As an adult who works in an office it's hard to focus all day on paperwork. Adults are allowed to get up and move to get our wiggles out any time we want to, drink when we're thirsty, snack when we're hungry. When I'm on the phone or have to sit through a meeting or powerpoint, I keep a couple "twiddle toys" nearby to keep my hands busy so I can focus on the speaker.

If he can't sit through a meal, feed him like you might feed a pet. That is, put out his food for 10 minutes. If he doesn't eat it in that time, put it away until the next meal.

In short, remember he's only 7. Last year he was in kindergarten, right? Peer pressure--seeing his classmates being rewarded for sitting and focusing--may compel him to conform. But for your teachers' sanity, if he's being a nuisance, talk to him/her and figure out a strategy to keep him from disrupting the learning of the other classmates.

I think that you would find Dr Sears ADD Book very intersting and helpful! We think that our 4 1/2 year old girl may have ADD and found this to be a very helpful book!!

HI C.,
As the homeschooling mother of four boys, I thought I'd share a few thoughts: (1) your involvement with, attention to and perception on this issue are admirable; (2) I think it can be more challenging for little boys than for little girls to thrive in the traditional school setting - homeschooling is a great option for these young men; (3)I would focus first on the things you can control - his behavior at home. Yes, he should be able to "follow a one-step instruction without getting distracted...and sit and eat a meal without getting up to wander around or play with anything he can reach". It may take some very intensive one-on-one focus, but work with him - even alongside him - to help him master these (which will feel so good to him with all the positive reinforcement you give him); (4) some kids really benefit from nutritional intervention, as their brains aren't getting the nutrients they need (for a variety of reasons) to stay focused -- if you want more info about this, feel free to send me a private message.
I'll say a prayer for you, your wonderful little stinker and all your family!
Blessings,
A.

C.,
It's hard to know for sure but another possibility is that he is bored. The ADD kids or kids with learning differences I've known have a terrible time with homework. 15 minutes worth could take an hour. He could be ADD because he needs to be told several times. He could be hyperactive. He may just be 7! I don't think it is stubborn or being a stinker, but being a kid. Sometimes we expect our kids to act like little adults, but they are just kids. He is still learning the English language, yet we expect so much.

It is great that you are paying attention and considering the possibility of ADD. Your gut is probably a better gage than some mamma like me in another state. So if your gut is telling you that I would say have him tested so that you can help him succeed. ADD kids can get labeled lazy or bad if it is not understood. Once it is understood you can better help him to succeed. Everyone getting on his case for not doing something he has no control over certainly isn't helpful.

By the way, most kids grades aren't as good as they could be. Do you clean your house or do your job as well as you could? All us mom's fall into this trap of expectations for our kids. I certainly did! I don't know whether it is social pressure or just what. We all struggle with it, but I would encourage you to keep in mind he is 7. Don't worry if he is not the top of his class as long as his grades are decent and he is happy. Honestly, wouldn't we all be better off if we led our lives with that philosophy?

You are a good mom because you are paying attention and have questions. If your child doesn't calm down by the end of the school year you might want to have him tested. In the meantime offer him positive rewards to get what you want. If he can't do that, and you feel your expectations are reasonable, then there is probably more going on.

Honestly I'd have to say the behavior you are describing sounds very much like ADD. Ask your school to do a Conner's on him ( you'll need to contact the special ed teacher and make this request and sign a permission to test) and take the results to your pediatrician. Ask your pediatrician, after he reviews the results, for a referral to a psychologist that specializes in children. Once you've done that you should have a clear picture of what is going on. Good luck and feel free to email me if you have any questions:)

Oh boy, this is kind of a hard one. Speaking from experience, my son was going through the same type of things in school. I thought it was typical boy stuff. They as you went on to higher grades, there were more complex issues on top of his learning issues. Things were not getting better. I really want to help my son but didn't know how. When he was in 4th grade, he had an awesome teacher that really cared about his kids and told me he was really concerned about my son. I finally gave in and took him to a counselor. Needless to say after about 5 months with a counselor we were recommended to a psychiatrist because they believed my son had ADHD.

This was very hard for me take. My husband was totally against this. I took him to see the psychiatrist and within the first two sessions, he was diagnosed with ADHD. We started him on meds and noticed the difference right away.

Now I am not saying your son has the same issue but the problems truely started in first grade and just got worse as the years went on.

My son has improved temendously in school but still struggles with reading which is a part of ADHD.

There is no harm in getting him tested or taking him to a counselor. Overall if you don't agree with what they say you can take him to someone else. But don't ignore these signs. They could cause him more harm then good in the long run.

Hope this helps, good luck to you and god bless.

My son was about 6 1/2 when we had him tested for ADD. He was in 1st grade and having a lot of trouble with focusing and getting his work done. Like you, I knew he was smart and could do the work. ADD runs in our family so we decided to have him tested. I made an appointment with his ped and we had to fill out some surveys. It turned out that he was in fact ADD. He was put on some meds and as a result he had major improvements at school. It is important to know that if you decide to go this route that you give your son credit for any improvements made. Make sure that he knows that the medicine just helps him to focus, but he is doing the work to improve. Our ped at the time gave us that advice and it was wonderful. You might check with your school district because they might be able to help you with the testing. Please feel free to contact me with any questions. My son is now in 4th grade and is doing awesome.

Most important you need to do what you think is best. You will get a lot of criticism for your choice (either way) but in the end you need to feel that you did what was best for your son. Good luck to you.

I recommend these two books over and over: Boys Adrift, and Why Gender Matters. Both are by Dr. Leonard Sax. He is an advocate for single-sex education but you don't have to put your son in an all-boys school to benefit from what he has to say.

You son sounds like he may need more of a challenge, but it also may be that a traditional classroom won't suit his learning style.

Good luck to you.

Your post made me smile as i read it because it reminded me of many students that I've taught! As a former first grade teacher I can tell you that's it's great you're keeping an eye on your son! People are quick to judge kids and try to label them add/ADHD etc as an explination when sometimes it's just that that child is a kinesthetic learner, smart and bored more easily by the curriculum, just need to learn and be taught how to be a student etc. Some kids are more easily distracted if they're visual learners and some can't concentrate for long periods of time yet. It frustrated me to no end to see kids that I know could do the work not doing it or not completeing it or just shoving it in their desks! There are things out there you can try like chair cushions on his seat for independent work (they help him wiggle in place), having the teacher give him movement breaks every so often (like going to bathroom or getting drink from fountain), even doing "stretching" if teacher can do it with whole class (I did this a lot with my kids where we'd stand up and do different exercises during the day). Even changing his diet might help (no joke (and I'm not saying you do!) I once taught a kid who ate white bread with chococlate on it for lunch every day and was so hyper it affected his work but once changed he was a different kid)!
Many kids this age are still developing emotionally, physically, and academicaly and just need a little extra guidance!
On the other hand if you want to talk to your pedi or have him evaluated by the school do so because if he is diagnosed then he'll get intervention that much sooner! Hope this helps and good luck! It's great to see proactive and concerned
parents looking for input!