25 answers

9 Year Old with Bladder Problem

My daughter is nine years old and will be ten in about two weeks. She has a bladder control problem and still wets the bed everynight (even if i wake her a couple of times she still wets). We have adapted to the problem and she wears goodnights to bed. I feel that of course she is too old for them now, but going to bed without them just makes a mess to be cleaned up in the morning. I have taken her to the doctor and she has seen a urologist about the issue. She has an underdeveloped bladder muscle and it will not reach full maturity until she is about 11 or 12. I do not want her to have to wear the good nights for two more years!!! She is ok with it and she understands she needs them so she doesn't complain about it thank goodness. There are medications out there that help children with wetting the bed. I am kind of reluctant about pumping her with medication just to curb a growth issue but I feel bad about her having to wear "diapers" until she is like 12. Has anyone had to deal with this issue for that long? If so how did u handle it? And how did your decision affect your child?

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Featured Answers

I don't know anything about the medication, but maybe instead of good nites she could use some sort of pad or a cloth alternative to disposable night "diapers"? They have pads made for women that have bladder control problems, and this would be easier for her if she spent the night maybe, as long as it had enough absorbency for her. It is an idea anyway.

My 8 and half year old girl still wets the bed as well. For the most part we're just waiting it out. However, we did try a nasal inhaler (I can't remember the name of the prescription) that you take at night before you go to bed. That really seemed to help her, although I was more interested in using it while she was at sleepovers and not so much worried about using it at home. But we finished up that prescription and I haven't gone back to refill it, so we're just back to using the Good Nights.

More Answers

make sure that she doesn't drink a lot in the afternoon. After 5 pm just allow her a glass of water or juice and one after diner. She must also go to the bathroom before going to bed.

Hello K....
I read your dilema, and believe me, my heart goes out to you! I understand that you have done everything you know to do to help your daughter through this. There is a scripture that says, " When you have done all you can do to stand...Stand!" I think you are at that point. You have discussed it thoroughly and frankly (and obviously tenderly) with your daughter...she seems to understand that it is NOT her fault, but her body hasnt caught up yet...it WILL remedy itself...and she is ok with that. Now, you have to resign yourself to that, too. It WILL be ok, and you HAVE done all the things a Good Mother would do. Rest now. Really, you have covered all the bases. I think the more YOU worry, the harder time she will have. Be good and supportive to her, get a sense of humor about the whole thing without putting her down, and the next 18 months will seem to fly.
Blessings,
L. in VA

K.,
I feel your pain...my son, who is now 15, has been dealing with this issue since he was 2. He was night trained for about a month and then the accidents started happening and he was soaked every single night..and has been ever since then. Unfortunately, his problem is linked to abnormal kidneys and he is preparing now for a transplant.
I share this with you to say that we have been through many struggles in this area for my son...sleepovers missed, camp skipped. He tried the meds, didn't help him. He's been through the pullups, and then chose not to at times.
The bottom line is that enurisis can negatively effect a child's self esteem. If your daughter feels good about herself when she uses the Goodnights and that's a solution to her....please just support her in that. This issue can escalate as she grows up and has to decide wether or not to do sleep overs...but let her home be her 'safety net'.
If she's happy w/ the arrangement she has now, I suggest that you support her in that and let her emotions guide your actions. I agree that it seems embarrasing and expensive to buy the Goodnights, but if this makes your daughter feel that her life is going 'normally', than great! She's not focusing on 'not being like others' and that's a plus and a sign that you are a good parent, so keep up that good work!
At least she will grow out of it...some of our children have issues that are not fixed without surgery; so there is some hope there...hold on to it:)And she might suprise the doctors and grow out of it before two years, so take it day by day.
Hope this helps,
L.

I have a daughter that probably has the same issue. She is 8. We do the same thing you do with the pull ups. We tried the medication route, but it did not work. I certainly think it is worth the try as our daughter would have liked to not wear the pull ups. She wants to spend the night at friends, but is embarrased about having to wear a pull up. I don't blame her and have kept her from being in that situation - I don't see that lasting much longer as sleep overs will become much more popular in the next year or so. I would encourage you to try the medication route - you can always stop if you think it has any bad side effects. This way you know you will have tried everything and you might even get a positive outcome.

Try magniseum tabs. I just heard how it can help. Maybe she is deficient. Looks up online what food like peanut butter has mag. in it and try it. Give it a few weeks.
God Bless

I agree with the last post. Be careful what messages you are sending ot your daughter. If she is okay with it and you dont want to give her meds why made a bigger deal out of it than needs to be. Kids get their cues from parents and you will play such a strong role in how she reacts to this. Encourage her and help her along the way, not make her feel bad about herself for wearing diapers.

My 8 and half year old girl still wets the bed as well. For the most part we're just waiting it out. However, we did try a nasal inhaler (I can't remember the name of the prescription) that you take at night before you go to bed. That really seemed to help her, although I was more interested in using it while she was at sleepovers and not so much worried about using it at home. But we finished up that prescription and I haven't gone back to refill it, so we're just back to using the Good Nights.

I wet the bed until I was ten or eleven and I wish that my step mother had been so understanding. She would become physically abusive. My brother and I both had a bed-wetting problem but she just told us we werelazy. He continued until he was around 13 or 14.

I would not have been so ashamed and hid the wet sheets if she had taken the same steps that you have. If your daughter is okay with wearing the Goodnights allow her too. Stress wil only make this small difficulty into a huge problem.

As far as sleeping over at friends or relatives, teach her to discreetly go into the restroom before bed and change into the Goodnight and immediately change it upon waking....we did not sleep over at all. All of my family member were afraid of us wetting the bed.

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