9-Month-Old Still Waking up Every 2-3 Hrs Every Night... HELP!

Updated on May 21, 2012
A.L. asks from Pittsburg, CA
20 answers

My soon-to-be nine month old son is still waking up every 2 hours during the night. He wakes up screaming and the only way to get him to stop is by giving him his bottle. He usually drinks 3 oz. and falls back to sleep... 2 hours later we repeat this again until about 6am. I've been told to let him cry it out, but my husband and I can't seem to do it. Any advice please? I forgot to mention that he is eating solids since he was 5 months old. He eats very well during the day. He eats soups, rice, beans, etc. thank you all for your comments. Will try it out and get back to you all.

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

he is hungry. Give him a big bowl of cereal before putting him to bed. It will help. Also at 9 months 3 oz of milk is not because he needs it it is because it is habit. make hm eat before bed and then let him cry it out and it will work.

2 moms found this helpful
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C.G.

answers from San Francisco on

You have plenty of options here, but I agree with the water in the bottle. I had this issue with my daughter as well and it worked wonders. She wouldn't take a bottle of just water so I diluted the milk with water over time. We never even made it to a bottle of just water before she lost interest and just stopped waking up. Good luck!

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D..

answers from Charlotte on

It's a habit. You haven't allowed him to learn to put himself to sleep (self-soothe) and he depends on his "fix" to do it.

Read Dr. Ferber's approach (undated version). Then do it without apology and without guilt. If you don't, you might as well let him sleep with you when he is a toddler, because when he is no longer in the crib, he'll be coming in your room all night long, every night.

If you read this book (which you can find on Amazon) and make your husband read it with you, both of you will come to an understanding of what is really important.

Good luck.
Dawn

5 moms found this helpful

N.G.

answers from Dallas on

As long as you are giving your son enough calories during the day, he does NOT (I repeat: DOES NOT) need a bottle at night. Also, please don't give him his bottle to fall back asleep. This causes nasty teeth problems, ear infections, and will make it so much harder for you to wean him off of the bottle.

9 months old is plenty old enough to use the cry-it-out method. At that age, if he is not sick, if he has a clean diaper, and if he has had enough to eat during the day, let him cry. It won't take long for him to get the point that YOU are in charge, not him, and he will stop throwing fits to get your attention. Nip it in the bud now, or you will wish you had when he's 3 and throwing full-blown tantrums.

3 moms found this helpful
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J.S.

answers from Columbia on

click on the links (blue underlined under the topmost mention) to find past MP questions, or google any of these:
"sleep training"
"ferber" (author of a book on sleep training, often referred to as ferberizing)
"babywise" (series of books starting off with sleep training)

Personal experience - my wife couldn't do it either. When we were both available, and after i **finally** read the Babywise book - we layed awake at 3 am listening to a whimper, then a cry, then a whimper and then sleep.

Mind you that took 15 minutes of listening. Up until then we kept making excuses to ourselves of why we needed to check on him earlier - see if these sound familiar:
his arm might be stuck in the crib (it never was)
he's hungry (he'd only take an ounce or two at this point)
he's scared/having night terrors
he misses us
he's lonely

We finally figured that 15 minutes of whining/crying wouldn't hurt him. So we did it.

After having been the parent that couldn't stand to hear their kid cry - to trying it that very first time and seeing that "oh, he survived and actually went back to sleep on his own" was mind blowing!

it suddenly seemed like we **knew** that crying was communicative, but also manipulative (at times). Once we saw a cry start, and finish without our intervention - it was like seeing the end of a movie for the first time. Now that we knew the ending, we could be comfortable to let it play out.

The second night took 10 minutes, third night took 5. He was 4 months old at the time, and 15 months old now. Whole house has been sleeping through the night for the past year.

3 moms found this helpful
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C.A.

answers from Dallas on

Poor baby is obviously hungry.

2 moms found this helpful
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F.B.

answers from New York on

We used Dr. Ferber, it worked for us. Took both of us on board to do it. We needed to encourage each other to be strong and not go in and intervene too soon, but to actually do the graduated waiting. One tough week, but so very well worth it.

Our ped had said that when they get to be 3 months, or 12 lbs, (whichever comes first), they no longer need to feed at night.

Good luck to you and yours,
F. B.

2 moms found this helpful

K.C.

answers from Washington DC on

I agree with dad on purpose. We didnt read "Babywise" but we did the same thing by default. I was exhausted, husband away for work, LO stirred nd I was too tired to get up immediately, so I waited. LO calmed himself and went back to sleep. WOW! Was truly amazing. That was nearly a year ago. We still have the occasional waking, but now I can tell if it's a nightmare (yes, LO's have them too) or just a rhythm to LO's sleep cycle. If its a nightmare, we intervene. If not, we let him self soothe. Also do the same at nap time ... Good luck!

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Z.R.

answers from San Francisco on

It is not hunger, even though I'm sure it really seems like it. My daughter did this until well over age one and I was convinced she was hungry. Then a friend gave me some advice: Give only water. This gets boring for the baby.

I used to not only let mine have milk, but also would turn on the tv quietly because it really seemed to calm her down and that way her crying wouldn't wake up the whole house. When her pediatrician told me I was encouraging her wake ups by providing milk and fun stimulation(ie: tv), I didn't believe it. But just to be sure, I tried without. I would give her water only, at night and when she would ask for milk, I told her the milk was sleeping. TV? "Tv is sleeping too. Daddy is sleeping and mommy needs to sleep and you need to sleep, too." We just sat quietly in the dark with a bottle of water. Did this for 2 nights and she stopped the frequent wake ups and slept for much longer periods.

I couldn't believe it! She really wasn't hungry, just waking up and knowing that she could have a little party with me. As soon as the fun time stopped, the problem was solved. I wished I had doe that months before!

Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
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E.T.

answers from Albuquerque on

I have three thoughts for you. First, is your son uncomfortable and that's why he's screaming? If yes, have you checked to see if he has reflux? Some children are comforted by drinking when their reflux hurts (the milk coats their throat and takes away the pain). That may be why he's waking so frequently. Try elevating the head of his bed to see if it helps, and talk to your pedi about testing for reflux.

Second thought, if your son is eating a lot of solid food, it's possible he's not getting enough calories during the day. Until about a year, solids are really just practice since they have FEWER calories than breastmilk or formula. Your son is drinking three or four or five times a night, right? At 3 oz each, that's between 9 and 15 ounces of milk or formula. If he can eat that much at night, he's hungry. Try to give him more in his bottles during the day to fill him up. If that means you need to reduce the number of solid food meals, it's ok.

And... like everyone else... he's now in the habit of waking up at night. You are going to have to train him to sleep longer and not rely on mom and dad to entertain him at night. That might mean letting him whimper for a few minutes once you're sure that he's not waking out of pain or hunger.

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C.G.

answers from San Francisco on

I so feel your pain I have been there just about 3 month ago. I "sleep-trained" my daughter following the method described in the book:"The easy sleep solution". It took about 4 nights. The second night she cried on and off for about 30 minutes and the third night about 1.5 hours on and off. It is not really the crying it out method which I personally did not like but there was a little crying involved. Now she is 13 month and she sleeps up to 13 hours a night. So it certainly worked for us.
Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
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M.K.

answers from Dallas on

We had the exact same issue with our LO when he was around 6 -9 months old....his paediatrician said we were still feeding him like a new born during the day - eveyr couple of hours and that was contributing to the problem. So we spaced out his meals during the day first and then we did let him cry one night....surprisingly he only cried for 15-20 minutes (Seemed like ages though) and then was fine starting the next night. If he would've cried longer, I would have gone and comforted him and maybe given him a little bottle of water........he is now 18 months and still sometimes wakes up once at night to feed....he shouldn't be doing this but I don;t mind since he has dinner around 7, goes to be around 8:30 so we feed him milk if he wakes up after 5 am or water bottle if he gets up before 5am........

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J.D.

answers from Denver on

I have read that children have there schedules set and it sounds in your case that his body automatically wakes him up for his bottle! so you need to slowly take him off his bottle in the middle of the night! I could never just leave my baby crying either! to this day and hes a not so much baby at 3 so i suggest to try rocking him till he stops crying and then put him back in the bed without a bottle because he is not hungry just habit! I went through the same thing and got refer d to a book called "the fussy baby book" by William Sears and Martha Sears and it has information on how to get your baby to sleep and stay asleep. not that your baby is fussy i dont want to offend just the name of the book Haha my first response was my baby isnt fussy lol Well anyway best wishes!

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

Since he's actually drinking 3 oz before going back to sleep, my guess is that he really is hungry.

You don't say what you feed him, but if you aren't doing any solids, I would start now. Try to get him as full as possible before bed. Hopefully with a full tummy he will sleep longer.

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J.K.

answers from Phoenix on

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G.K.

answers from San Francisco on

I want to make a suggestion (albeit late): it could very well be that your baby is hungry. You shouldn't stop night feedings until over a year old, and I encourage you to consider your own eating habits, appetite, and reasons for waking before listening to anyone who tells you that there's no way your baby is hungry during the night at 9mo.

Even as adults, we wake in the night for a variety of reasons: something startled us, we're hot/cold, bad dream, have to pee, hunger. All of the reasons could lead to trouble falling right back to sleep. How many times have we lain awake at 3am and are awake so long that we get hungry? Or how many times have we gone to bed not having eaten since dinner and woken hungry in the night? Have we ever woken in the night after a bad dream and just wanted to snuggle with our significant other (if one is in bed with us)? My point is that even adults wake in the middle of the night, sometimes 2, 3, 4 times depending on the reason. You need to listen to your baby and read his cues properly.

Try to remember he's only 9mo, and most babies don't sleep 12 hours per night at that age. Yes, some do, but most sleep 5-6 hours. However, I do agree with putting a bottle of water in his bed. My son always had a bottle of water, and some nights it helped, some nights it didn't. Try to relax and keep a good routine throughout the day. Good naps generally lead to good night sleeping, so if it's his sleep your concerned with, start with naps :)

Hopefully in a few months, you'll look back and not even remember when his sleep improved :)

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D.K.

answers from Columbus on

Our son was still doing that up until about 12 or 13 months. We gradually dropped feedings, but still comforted him. At 15 months he now sleeps through the night about 95% od the time on his own. I hope you find something that works for you.

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M.W.

answers from Sacramento on

It sounds like he has got into this routine. My son did this too. I started to put water in the bottle instead of milk, Soon he stopped waking up expecting milk. At first he will cry but you need to ignore it if you can, as long as he is dry and comfortable and not hungry then he is fine to cry, But it won't take too many nights to break the habit. good luck

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A.P.

answers from Janesville-Beloit on

Be sure he is getting plenty of formula/milk during the day, in addition to the solids. A big bottle right before bed, even if he ate a good dinner. Then, I would start trying to replace some of the nighttime feelings with either just comforting, or a small bottle of water. Hopefully if his tummy gets used to longer stretches it will help. Good luck! Our daughter didn't sleep through the night until after 11 months, but now she is a great sleeper, so there is hope!

3..

answers from Sherman on

i'm in the same boat as you i have an 8month old and he still doesnt sleep through the night he gets up every 2-3 hours i give him a bottle and most of the time he just holds it in his mouth until he falls asleep or he just eats 2-3 oz also i have asked our pedi and he told me that some kids might not ever learn to sleep through the night as all..(aww) i try to extend his bedtime thinking he is going to sleep to early or taking to long of naps but nothing changes i even feed him baby food before bed and still he wakes up..his favorite time to wake up is 3-4 am just to talk to himself..lol. so now when he wakes i dont just jump up and go see whats wrong i wait until he really is crying and then i give him a bottle, a pat back to sleep sometimes he just puts himself back to sleep , but i did notice that he sleep better then is really dark in the bedroom..good luck

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