16 answers

9 1/2 Month Old Throws Fits!!

Ok so I always thought that "throwing fits" was a learned behavior from other kids or something but my 9 1/2 month old boy literally throws fits! He is a very strong willed little one, when he does something and we tell him no, he looks at us, laughs and does it again....he has even learned to shake his head no. Before he gets into something like the dog bowl, he shakes his head no, looks up at us laughs and gets into it. Which is all cute, but when we do tell him no and he doesn't get his way then he can throw a fit. He will kick his feet and scream, arch his back, etc. So I was wondering what if there is anything else besides telling him no and sticking to it. I want to work on this behavior but I know he is still so young! HELP!!

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Ummmm...thanks for the advice so far. A few seem a little harsh and I would never do! I just wanted some tips, not to get lashed out at!! I would never physically restrain my baby like that and I'm very worried that someone would suggest it. I just wanted to know if there were any techniques, not physically related, that might help.

Featured Answers

Sorry, but babies at this age cannot comprehend the idea of "off limits". Best to simply remove the tempatation or block it from view.

1 mom found this helpful

thats all been great advice for toddlers. My son is the same age, and is starting the same thing. The blanket thing is "rage reduction", my parents did it to me. But so far when my starts a fit i put him in his saucer or play pin, leave the room. When he cant see and hear me no more he stops and starts playing

1 mom found this helpful

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Not to worry-fits aren't learned they are human nature until your child learns other ways to express his displeasure. Firmly and calmly tell him he's not allowed to do whatever forbidden activity he's doing and Lovingly remove him from the situation. Around 18 months you can start time outs for one minute per year of age ie 90 seconds for an 18 month old or 2 minutes for a 2 yr old. Until then you have an INFANT who naturally will show you what he wants in the only way he knows how. Perfectly normal for him to do that! I have 2 children who both did that and are well adjusted and happy children.

3 moms found this helpful

Um.. I highly recommend you purchase and read "Happiest Baby on the Block", and "Happiest Toddler on the Block".

I would not advise tying an infant down in a blanket to force compliance. Seems a little (a lot) outlandish to me (as another mother suggested...).

Your pediatrician should have given you handouts that talk about your childs development and within those packets, there should be one, inparticular, that talks about NOT trying to discipline an infant.
Please keep in mind- your child is an infant. Not a toddler. Going all hardcore on the poor little baby might backfire on you immensely leaving you with a toddler with some serious behavioral issues.

Babies are, by their very nature, curious. He is exploring his world and enjoying what he finds. If you don't want him in something, perhaps you should move it out of his reach instead of expecting him to understand your commands and comply. =D

I would also HIGHLY recommend you buy toilet locks, and properly baby-proof your home as well. I can guarantee you the trouble he will get into when you look away is not worth it and NO means nearly nothing at all to an infant. -as I learned with my first child

PLEASE buy those books- I can't recommend them enough as they helped me get a clearer picture of what my baby is thinking and what I can do to work with her behaviors.

2 moms found this helpful

Hi K.-

Throwing a fit is a result of the child's inablity to communicate with you. Imagine you're in another country trying to ask for help, but cannot communicate with the people, that's what you're son is feeling.

To help,

1) Anticipate his needs to reduce frusteration
2) Explain to him why he cannot have it, yes even at 9 m. "that's the doggie's food, it's yuck for you, do you want a cracker instead?"
3) Childproof so you eliminate saying no as much as possible.
4) Give your child the words. This is a big one. If you know your son wants a ball, say, "do you want the ball? Let me get it for you." This will help him be an early talker, and early talkers can say their needs.
5) Eliminate 'No" as much as possible. No is a word that shuts doors and eliminates options. Even the youngest kid hates the word no. No causes more tantrums than it solves. Try, "we play with balls outside, let's go outside to play." instead of "no throwing the ball".

Good Luck

R. Magby

2 moms found this helpful

Yes, the better your home is childproofed the better your life will be. 9 months is still young for him to really totally understand.. To him this is all a game..

Put up a baby gates so that your dog and his bowl will be safe and areas of your home can be kept off limits. Closing doors are still ok since he cannot reach the knobs. Soon you will need knob covers..

These things will be able to come down as soon as your son can understand that he is not to touch them.. Also they are quick little guys.. he can get into things very quickly so get down on your hands and knees in every room and see what he sees.

Distraction for this age is also great.. Before he can get to something, use a high pitched excited voice and entice him to join in what you are doing..

I agree very short.. "No throw ball inside." "Dog Bowl, no touch."

Find some parenting books and learn some to the different techniques. They really do work if he is raised with them from this age. No spankings and yelling will be needed..

2 moms found this helpful

Saying "no" to the bad behavior and explaining why. (obviously he doesn't understand the reason why right now but it will get you in a good habit for when he's older and does) Then you can put him in the play pen for a couple of minutes with no toys. Be consistent and you'll get your point across. Oh ya and by all means don't laugh or smile at him even though I'm sure he's super cute when he does the behavior that is unwanted. Good Luck.

2 moms found this helpful

thats all been great advice for toddlers. My son is the same age, and is starting the same thing. The blanket thing is "rage reduction", my parents did it to me. But so far when my starts a fit i put him in his saucer or play pin, leave the room. When he cant see and hear me no more he stops and starts playing

1 mom found this helpful

unfortunately ur son is too young to discipline. you'll just have to put away as much of the 'forbidden' stuff as possible so that you're not saying no to him all the time. at some point if he hears it alot i heard it doesnt have an effect anymore. also, if he does throw a fit, try just ignoring him for a few minutes. then as soon as takes a breath and is silent, give him a lot of love and attention. that way, he'll know fits don't get him anywhere. obviously if he's in real danger or if he's hysterical, you can try to calm him down but he might just need to air out his feelings. haha. one last thing -- this book may prove to be of help to you:

http://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Strong-Willed-Child-Clini...

but again, he's too young for this. just something for the future :)

1 mom found this helpful

This is perfectly normal behavior, and it will get better in time ... like, age 2. ;-) For the moment, in addition to not giving in to his fits, I would also suggest removing temptation as much as possible, giving him something positive to do do instead of the 'naughty' behavior, and distraction. For example, the dog bowl is also a favorite of my 13 mos. old. So, the moment I see him toddling towards it, I pick it up and put it on the counter ... then give it back to the dogs when my son is no longer interested. Also try telling your son something 'positive' to do instead of the behavior ... he may or may not respond yet, but he will soon. For example, if my son is eyeing the DVD rack, I might squat down on the floor, open up my arms, and say, "Come here baby" ... and then praise him excessively when he does. Giving them an alternative to do makes it easier for them to stop whatever they shouldn't be doing. And, finally, at this age, I think its still ok to distract them out of the fits. No, he can't have the forbidden object, but show him something else fun he can do. Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

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