8 Year Old Doesn't Stop whining....EVER!!!

What I did with my whinners was ignore them.....easy to say I know....very very hard to do. Whinners are very dedicated to the pratice and tend to just get louder. I would sit by and if it gets real loud or long I would explain to the dog or other children, whoever or whatever was around, how the offender needed to act if they wanted me to pay attention. ie...its really annoying when your sister whines like that isn't it. If she would just ask in a normal voice I would listen to her. I know she knows what that sounds like because she wasn't whinning when she talking about that tv show she likes. Be consistent with whatever you decide.
GOOD LUCK!

I would recommend the book John Rosemond's Six Point Plan for Raising Happy Healthy Children. He is a child/family therapist and parenting expert. His website is www.rosemond.com; you can get a feel for him there and read his recent newspaper columns. He talks about giving kids chores (to develop self esteem and purpose in life) and many, many other things. Giving a child excess or unfounded praise does not build maturity or self esteem. Good for you for caring so much about these kids!

It appears to me that she has found her attention-getter. Video-tape her when she whines, then play it back as a home movie. Physical evidence can be wonderful, since they sometimes don't realize what they look like or how they sound when they are behaving poorly.

Watch SuperNanny and Nanny 911. They have GREAT techniques. Not every technique works for every child, but you'll find one that works. Try watching these programs with her. My kids have shaped up within seconds of watching other families with their out-of-control children.

Be consistent and clear about your expectations. Make a chart that shows what the reward is for good behaviors and the penalty for poor behaviors (use something like popsicle sticks or stickers or some other small, easily obtainable item).

Set up a jar or chart for each child where they can put their credits that they earn. Once they achieve a certain number (10 or whatever you deem appropriate), they get a special reward. The reward can be something like choosing a special tv program or a movie to rent or a fun activity that everyone can participate in because they have also earned enough "credits". Many children respond well to the positive reinforcement and the peer pressure. They also tend to want to do well and impress others with their abilities to earn credits.

I applaud you for finding a job that allows you to work full-time and still spend time with your children. I wish you the best of luck with this situation!

What do the girl's parents say when you ask them how they'd like for you to deal with helping break off the whining?

L.,

My first thought was: this little girl is a BRAT!!!! As the nanny it's hard, but you can stop the behavior.

Stick to your guns, if she's whining at you, tell her you don't understand her when she's whining, then leave the room. If she continues to whine at you, put her in her room and tell her she can come out If, and only if, she stops whining. If she's having a fit about tying her shoes give her a time limit. She has 5 minutes to put her shoes on or you're not going to____________. If she doesn't comply, it's her loss.

When at the park and she whines that nobody will play with her tell her that nobody likes a cheater. If she whines as you drive by a park tell her that only good girls that don't whine get to go there. If she starts whining about being "hurt" then have her sit quietly next to you for a while. If she starts wanting to play again because the other kids are playing and having fun, tell her nope, you're hurt, you have to sit and watch. Also I'd tell her that if she starts whining about anything while at the part you will leave immediately and she can spend time in her room.

I'd even consider talking with her parents and see if you all can work on her whining. Most likely she's whining at them too. Y'all need to be a united front and shut this down now. I don't have a specific link, but Super Nanny should have some great tips on how to stop this problem behavior.

BTW, this 8 year old little girl sounds like my 4 1/2 year old son. We've done all my suggestions with him and one or another has worked with him just about every time.

Hope this helps,
Melissa

The job isn't right for you, so why don't you leave? It's like being married. If you don't like it because of one little thing, that little thing is just going to get bigger;in this case, the whining and it driving you crazy.

something I have done with kids is tell them I don't understand whiness...as well as when they whine I will say Huh? I only speak English try again.