7Yr. Birthday Party, Invite Whole Class or Just a Few?

Updated on January 07, 2011
N.L. asks from Portage, MI
25 answers

Hello My son is having his first friend bday party this year and I was just wondering if we should invite his whole class or just the few that he really wants. He is in 1st grade and has 20 kids in his class plus the couple friends in diff. classes. We are going to be having it at Chuck E Cheese so I have to think of the expence as well.

Thank you for any advise you can give!

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A.B.

answers from Detroit on

I just had a 7th birthday for my daugher. It was also her first friend party. I invited just the girls. Keep in mind you have to be responsible for watching those kids at Chuck E Cheese because most parents will just dropped off their child and then leave. I had a sign up sheet for the parents and required them to put down their cell phone number incase I needed to get in touch with them. Good Luck! It is a hard decision to make.

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G.B.

answers from Detroit on

I always think about the few kids that never make friends and how much it means to them to be invited to a party. A couple of my grandsons are like this and it's painful for them always to be left out. If I could afford it, I'd invite this whole class as it's small. Probably not everyone will come anyway. It'd be a real kindness to do so.

M.S.

answers from Detroit on

Birthday Parties at Chuck E Cheese can be expensive. I would limit him to his closest friends, maybe 10 or so. It can also get very chaotic at Chuck E Cheese and you don't want to be responsible for trying to manage 20+ kids at a birthday party. I limited my daughter to 10 when she had her birthday party there. Most parents stayed, which was very helpful, but if you have parents that just drop their child(ren) off, you are responsible for them.

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M.R.

answers from Phoenix on

Looking back at all the huge, invite the entire class parties I have generously thrown over the many years and children I have raised, and I still have an 8 yr. old - I recommend you invite just his favorite few friends. Smaller parties are SOOOO much more enjoyable for all, even the parents. I cringe at the thought of having to go to class parties, specifically ones at CHuck E. CHeese's - it's just pure mayhem and ends up being a free for all experience. No one can really talk or connect.

If I could do it all over again I would definitely have planned smaller parties.

Happy birthday no matter what you decide!

4 moms found this helpful
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K.P.

answers from New York on

My thought is to either invite everyone or all of the boys. If you elect to invite certain children, remember to mail the invites and remind your son not to talk about his party infront of the children who are not included.

3 moms found this helpful
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J.M.

answers from Boston on

We always just invite friends. After all, if you were having a party, you'd just invite your friends, not everyone you knew. Honestly, I think a lot of parents are relieved not to be invited to everything. I know I don't mind at all spending the money on a birthday gift for someone my daughter plays with all the time, but if its a little girl I've never even heard mentioned before, I'd rather not.

3 moms found this helpful

B.S.

answers from Saginaw on

If you can afford inviting everyone, go for it. However, if your worried about he expense then just invite his closest friends. Or some people only invite the boys. Its really up to you, but you can do it any way that you prefer.

1 mom found this helpful
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V.H.

answers from Detroit on

Whatever you do, don't be surprised by the lack of RSVP's you get. Loads of parents won't bother to say if they are coming despite you having to pay and cater for their kid. Drives me nuts......

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K.S.

answers from Columbus on

I will actually be going through this next month. My son wants to invite his whole class-20 kids. He wants to be fair, which I think is great. But, I'm also trying to help him understand that he doesn't have to. He can only invite the kids that he would really want to spend time with. So, I'm really leaving it up to him & planning his party accordingly for cost. Even if he invited the whole class, I wouldn't expect them all to come anyway.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

It gets harder every year, doesn't it, because they make more friends each year?
The rule at our school (if you're having them passed out there) is that either 1. everyone or 2, all the girls/all the boys are invited.
What does your son want to do?
This year(2nd grade) I am more inclined to have him choose a few of his close classmates and his other buddies (baseball, BFFs, etc) for a total of 12-15. If we invite all the boys in his class (12) that will get too big....last year it was all of the boys PLUS about 8 more, so we had about 20 for a sports complex party. Thanks goodness it was inexpensive per kid!

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L.O.

answers from Detroit on

Your son will not have a better birthday party if you invite 5 good friends or 50 acquaintences. Managing a ton of 7 year olds at a birthday can be quite a job if the parents do not stay.

I would invite a few kids...

We went to a bday party with 30+ kids... the birthday girl of course got 30+ presents.. all $10 junky toys.. do you really want all of those toys for your son??

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E.C.

answers from Detroit on

My son's friend recently had a laser tag birthday party. Due to the expense and inviting some non-school friends and family, his parents chose to only invite a select group of his classmates.

The mom called the parents of the invited children to get our mailing addresses and email addresses to avoid having to send invites to school. She did also ask us to speak with our children about being discrete. I personally felt that this was reasonable.

It can become overwhelming and more of a headache than a fun time if there are too many people to handle. Also, as some moms stated there may be a lack of RSVPs. So if you invite 20, you might only get 5 RSVPs but might have 12 to show up which only causes more stress.

I wish you lost of luck and hope that things go smoothly for your son's birthday.

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S.R.

answers from Pittsburgh on

How will you be passing out the invitations... in class, mailing, emailing etc? Has your son been invited to any other parties with his classmates? How many people would actually show up? You could send invites to a few and put the rrsp date a few days before, and if you aren't getting many replies back, invite a few more. Personally, I suggest inviting the whole class, it is likely only half will come. I also agree about adding the cost for anyone else that comes.

S.
www.LiveYourDreamsAtHome.com

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M.H.

answers from Charlotte on

My son just had his 7th birthday party, and we invited all of the boys in his class. At this age, boys usually only want boys, and vice/versa with girls. I would invite all of the boys, plus the other few boys in the other classes. You will still end up with a lot of people - close to 15, I bet. That is PLENTY for a party. Cheers.

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E.I.

answers from New York on

If you can afford it invite them all. Not all will show up. I believe some schools have a rule that all children must be invited for them to hand out the invites. Otherwise you would have to get the addresses. Definitly check on that. Chucky cheese does a fun party. Enjoy!

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M.T.

answers from Abilene on

Make sure you mention on the invite $6.50 for additional children or something to let parents know you are only paying for the invited child. That way entire families don't show up expecting to be paid for.
We did a party at Chuck E. Cheese. To get in the ticket air tube, you have to reserve the party ahead of time. Have fun.

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M.W.

answers from Detroit on

Tough. I remember how devastating it was for me not to get to go to a birthday party because the number was restricted... However, people make birthday parties into such a huge affair that its not financially responsible to invite the whole class.

I'd say to my kid, either have a birthday where we go (as a family) to chuck E cheese and you play a million games, or we'll do something fun for all your friends at school here at the house.

Good luck!

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K.M.

answers from Detroit on

Ok for the chuckie cheese part you can invite all the class. For the sleep over limit 5 kids. The golden rule for sleep overs and parties in general 10 percent usually never show and if your not use to alot of kids or if you have more than two kids yourself don't make it h*** o* yourself. Have 3 or 5 extra kids at the house for the night and u will be fine have more and without hubbie help pulling hair. The rules for our kids is 5 kids to your birthday they pick the 5. If its at chuckie chees and we can afford it they can invite the class if not limit is 8 to 10 kids depending on our budget. Keep your budget in mind and what your going to have all those kids do at the sleep over too.

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A.S.

answers from Lansing on

I would say just invite a few but send the invitations in the mail it stop at the kids' houses instead of having him pass them out at school.

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K.B.

answers from Columbus on

Our rule is that you can invite as many kids as your age... So for a 7th bday you can invite 7 kids. It's worked great for us!

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A.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

We have always done just a few that my son wants to invite, he is in first grade also. He would invite the class, but it's always been a space and money thing because we have a large amount of cousins and such too. Our schools policy is that you can not take invitations for just a few kids, it's the entire class gets one, or no one gets one at school, so you just have to contact the kids by phone or e-mail, or mail invitaions. I wish we had a Chuck E. Cheese close so we could have a party there, that would be so much fun!! Have a great party!!!!

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J.C.

answers from Lincoln on

Just invite a few. Tell your son he can invite 10 people and ask him for a list. Just make sure you don't pass out the invitations at school.
If someone asks him why they weren't invited he can tell them, "My mom said I could only invite 10, no exceptions." and if a mom asks you why her kid wasn't invited you can say, "I asked little Tommy to give me a list of who he wanted to invite, so I just went of his list and respected his wishes."
No one expects you to invite the whole class to Chuck E Cheese, that's crazy.

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M.F.

answers from Detroit on

Invite just a few. I have been to parties where the ENTIRE class showed up. Plus some brought siblings. As a general rule of thumb when not inviting the whole class invites get mailed out. This is a school policy for us.

Be sure to give ample time to respond. I was given an invite the last week of school before Christmas vacation. The party was that same weekend and I had three days to respond and find a sitter for my other daughter! Try to mail them two weeks before you want them to respond. This will give people at least a week to think about it.

Don't worry about hurting someone's feelings. My kids don't get invited to everything and they never cry about it. It's part of life in my opinion. Besides, there isn't any sense in paying for all these kids to come when your son isn't even really friends with them. He'll have a better time with a smaller group and there will likely be less meltdowns.

Whatever you decide I hope you have fun :o)

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M.M.

answers from Tallahassee on

N., I had done the same for my son and daughter when they turned 7. I invited all the kids in their classroom to the skating ring. There were about 25 in their class. At $9.95 a head, it was not cheap. Lucky for me both times on about half the kids showed up. But word of advise, on the invitation I noted that parent had to pay for any additional children they might want to bring. You would be surprised who many parent brought siblings. Good luck

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K.S.

answers from Grand Rapids on

I would invite the whole class because as Ginny pointed out there are some that never get invited to any of the parties. Chances are most of the kids won't show up anyway but at least they were invited. My daughter was invited to a party (with the rest of the class) to a bowling party and of the 24 kids in the class I think only about half came If you do only invite his friends them make sure you mail the invitations so that the kids don't show their invitation around to those not invited.. Good luck and have fun!!

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