7 Year Old Still Sucks Thumb to Go to Sleep!!

Updated on June 24, 2008
T.C. asks from Spokane, WA
18 answers

She is quite attached to it. When we were at the dentist and the dentist mentioned that her front teeth were pushing out a bit and asked her about her thumb, my daughter fessed right up..."yep, I have to use it to go to sleep...if I don't suck on my thumb, I can't sleep!" So, the dentist mentioned stopping...my daughter started crying. We've tried throughout the years to get her to stop. Tabasco sauce (didn't work, but now she LOVES hot, spicy food!), the bitter stuff made for thumb sucking (sucks right through it), and socks. But she seriously thinks that if she can't suck her thumb she won't sleep!

Tonight, she sprained her hand and the doctor put her in a splint...it's the hand that she sucks. She only sucks the left thumb. She went in to go to bed...10 minutes later she came out crying that she can't suck her thumb with her splint on. I told her I wanted her to try for 15 minutes and if she couldn't go to sleep I would take it off. Luckily, we were at the ER until 2 hours past her bedtime, so she was extremely tired and did go to sleep. But I don't know about tomorrow...and the splint is only on for a few days. I know she will go back to sucking.

Any suggestions on helping her stop?

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L.D.

answers from Portland on

Well, this is probably not helpful, but my son is 7 1/2 and still sucks his thumb and I have given up worrying about it. Yes, it pushed out his teeth, but he is going to need braces anyway, so whatever makes him happy. He'll quit eventually. He used to rock and suck his thumb, now he only sucks his thumb and only to fall asleep. Seriously, I wouldn't stress about it.

L.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.K.

answers from Seattle on

There is a child in my son's kindergarten who has a gadget he wears in his mouth to stop his thumb-sucking. I guess it is a dental appliance of some type, but I have no idea what it is called. He was quite open about telling me what it was for, and he could not take it out (I don't know if that was easily removable or not, because there were cupcakes on the table he was not eating due to this device...which makes me think it was not easily removable!)

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K.R.

answers from Bellingham on

Ohhhhh. My heart goes out to your daughter. I was a thumb-sucker for way too long past my 'baby years' too. I can tell you eventually, when I became a teenager I quit on my own. The need just went away.
My mom tried everything to get me to stop too, but nothing worked. I couldn't get her to understand that I NEEDED it to fall asleep.
You can't cut off her thumb, and really that's the only way to have control over it.
I can tell you it did cause my two front teeth to have a slight overbite and I have a tongue-thrust sometimes when I speak (doesn't cause any speech impediment) and my husband thinks it is adorable and one of the things he was attracted to about me in the first place.
I am fine now. Haven't sucked my thumb in over twenty five years, but I can say there is some psychology involved here. This is the way your daughter has come to soother herself at night. It's calming and relaxing to her. Part of it is just habit, but part of it is something SHE has control over. Until SHE wants to stop---well, you know that's an old battle of the wills.
Help her find other ways to relax at night and maybe it will lessen the need for her to soothe herself this way. Soft music, an extra cuddly blanket or stuffed animal. Lavender scented things work for relaxation.
Also- check in on her when she is finally asleep and pull that thumb out of her mouth. She'll just keep sucking in her sleep if it's there.
Good luck. Your intentions are good.

1 mom found this helpful
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A.D.

answers from Portland on

T.,
I was a thumb sucker. When my mom put yucky bitters on it I would simply suck the other thumb. In my experience I believe that children suck their thumbs and other nighttime rituals for security and comfort. You have heard about the child who won't go to sleep without their favorite blankie or stuffed animal, well the same applies to the thumb.
The first thing my mother did was take away my favorite blankie. The second thing she did was take me to a doctor to get me to stop sucking my thumb. Within 1 month I had stopped. It was not my choice, I was forced into it.
I completely understand about the teeth issue as I had a retainer to correct an overbite, but is it worth the agony of your child's security and comfort?
Both of our boys have special blankies and one of our boys chews at the satin trim when he is tired. Because of what my mom did to me, I will NEVER take these items away from our boys. They were never thumb suckers, but if they were, I would NEVER take that away from them.
The worse thing was that my thumb developed a bump from sucking, but after I stopped it went away.
I wish you well with your daughter and perhaps you can find another soother for her at night that makes her happy where she will eventually stop on her own.

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P.J.

answers from Seattle on

Hey there~

I would like to say that I am a partially reformed "thumb sucker." I do still find myself starting to suck my thumb during a movie that I get real involved in. I am 37 years old and didn't stop my thumb sucking until I went to the orthodonist for braces at age 12. He put a "loop" behind my front teeth. It poked me when I tried to suck my thumb. Through negative response to my behavior I have learned not to suck my thumb much. This did not hurt me and noone had to yell to get me to stop. I don't know if an ortho even does those loops anymore, or if that was it's name. It was 1982 and the ortho was almost retired! Perhaps a ortho might be able to help your daughter. I wish you luck!

P.

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S.C.

answers from Seattle on

I had 2 thumb suckers. My first at 5 I took to the dentist and forked over 500 to have this thing put in her mouth to keep her from being able to suck her thumb- the thumb sucking stopped, but the nail biting started. My 2nd, sucked hers until she was about 9. We are looking at braces in the near future. She stopped on her own.

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M.Z.

answers from Seattle on

As long as she is only doing it in bed, just leave her alone. This is a comfort that she still needs. Our family if full of thumb suckers. We always just put limits on it. By four it was to be a private thing done only at home in front of the tv or in bed. By six it was something that was to be done in the privacy of your bed. By 10 everybody had stopped on their own, because by then there had been sleepovers with non family members and they would get embrassed. Some of the kids needed braces but a lot of them never did. My dentist said it is more about genetics than the thumb.

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C.K.

answers from Portland on

You have the perfect in. I mean really, she has a splint on her sucking thumb hand and she went to sleep without sucking it.
Praise her like crazy, tell her how grown up she is, go out and buy her a small gift to show her how proud you are of her, that she is a big girl now and can sleep without the finger and now her teeth won't be pushed out and make her talk funny. Trust me it happens, my brother couldn't be stopped sucking his thumb and his teeth got pushed out and are in terrible shape to this day.
How long will she be in the splint because time is of the essence. Stay on the praising stuff let her call her grandmother. grandfather, aunts, uncles, anyone, really make a big deal with it.

And for all you moms out there that have kids that suck thumbs or binkys, this worked for me. Mine sucked their thumbs, and when they started doing that at 3 months or so, I gave them a special blanket made just for them. They only got the blanket at nap time, they couldn't carry it around with them places or play with it, it was only special for sleep time. When they were 18 months and old enough to understand we told them they were big boys now and the blanket had to go in the place of honor, the cedar chest. Well, since they associated the thumb with the blanket they quit sucking their thumbs. They would visit their blankets at times but never asked for it to help them sleep. It worked with all three of mine and two nieces, so give it a try if you worry your child will continue to suck the thumb or binky after 2, (and really that should be the time), these kids at 6 and older in carts riding around with binkys in their mouths really look silly, sorry I call it as I see it.
Good luck with all that.

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J.A.

answers from Seattle on

I've got a degree in dental assisting and have come across a few kids who's sucking habit was so severe they had to have an appliance put it (a device that makes it impossible for a thumb to fit in the roof of the mouth). I would discuss with your daughter's dentist the severity of her overbite and if he thinks it would warrant such a measure. If there's a possibility she'll need braces in the future anyway, you might not have to worry about it. It's a habit she will eventually outgrow.

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T.W.

answers from Yakima on

Hi-- I feel for you. I have a 9 year old son that was a thumb sucker as well. He would only do it at home and mainly just at bedtime. He had a regular dental appointment and I voiced my concern about him needing braces. It was quickly identified how he was ruining his teeth by sucking his thumb and causing him to have an overbite. We made the appt. the same day to see the orthodontist for a consult and sure enough there are things we need to do now to help. Hearing how he needed braces in part because of his actions, helped him to immediately stop sucking his thumb. If I had known it would be that easy I would have taken him to the Dentist much sooner :) Since it wasn't an immediate effect for your daughter, I would try to locate other kids that she knows that do already have braces, so that she can hear from them how it is painful at times and not so fun. She needs to keep hearing that she is damaging her teeth and that she can stop it from getting worse. Maybe reading children's books about getting braces would be one back door approach to addressing thumb sucking. Also, I would work with her on finding other calming things for night time such as a hot bath, holding onto a stuffed animal etc. to see if you can't help change the habit. Help her to be in control of her choices so that she comes to the realization of what is going to help her the most. Most likely one way or the other she will outgrow the habit in time so hang in there.

A little about me:
I am a 38 year old mom of two, 6 year old girl, 9 year old boy and a step-mom of a 3 year old and "our" baby on the way. I am a social worker that works with foster children as well.

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S.M.

answers from Seattle on

I don't know how extreme you are willing to go but, my friend had the same problem with her 8 yr old and she did it ALL DAY everyday. I am not sure if the dentist mentioned it. But there is a device the can put in her mouth that does not allow them to suck their thumb. It breaks the susction from the roof of the mouth, I beleive. . .Hopefully other moms have other ideas for you, and hopefully it does not come to that. But I do know 2 kids that have had it and had success. Good Luck
Take Care,
S.

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S.L.

answers from Portland on

I just had to respond because I sucked my thumb to go to sleep until I was 8! And do you know how I stopped? I broke my wrist and had to wear a cast. My thumb was sticking out, but it just didn't seem right to suck it anyway. The first night was kind of hard because my arm ached and I didn't have my left thumb to suck, but after that it wasn't so bad. I think I was just ready to stop.
You're daughter sounds maybe a little more attached than I was, but not much. I guess my advice is that it may not be a big deal and she'll just stop on her own when she feels ready enough. Maybe the splint will be just the right impetus like it was for me. My parents never tried to get me or my sister to stop sucking our thumbs and we both just quit eventually on our own.
Good luck! Sometimes I've wished my daughter or son would take up thumb-sucking so my breasts could have a break!

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L.H.

answers from Seattle on

GM T....okay I'm sure I'll get every dental worker in the county sending me an email about this advice, but oh well. Here's my thinking...WHO CARES!!!! My 5 and a half year old still sucks her thumb (80% at bedtime). If that's what floats her boat, it's fine by me. How many teenagers do you see walking around sucking their thumbs in public? Eventually someone will call her a baby and she'll be embarrassed and start only doing it when no one can see her and when SHE'S ready she'll give it up completely. My mom and husband were both thumbsuckers and have both said nothing their moms tried work.

Those extreme overbite cases are not common (the one hygenist even said she's seen a "few"...she's works in a dentists office and has only seen a few). And besides, lots of kids needs braces who never sucked their thumb.

I don't know about you but I have lots of battles to fight with my 5 year old (keeping her room picked up, eating food that's good for her, playing nice) that the thumb sucking is just not something I'm personally going to worry about.

Good luck...you have do what feels right for you but I'm here to say I think you're a great mom even if you do nothing about it! ;)

L. H

PS Happily married for 10 years and a sahm to 9 and 5 year old girls.

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M.D.

answers from Seattle on

T.,
My son was the same way! we tried everything...all to no avail. As we neared his 8th bday it was time to start looking at orthodontics. He needed to have an expander bar put in across the roof of his mouth. There were 2 choices the plain bar, or one w/a 'crib' attatchment. The crib consisted of 4 prongs pointing downward. This makes it impossible to get a good suck. It was his choice. Once he realized I would put the crib on (for an extra $400)if he didn't break his habit, he stopped...immediatly. I mean he caught himself 3 times in the 5 week waiting period...and I mean w/in seconds not minutes....only 1 time did he do it all night...and that day he was overtired and up past bedtime so quite understandable. The bar is now out and the habit has not returned!

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D.H.

answers from Seattle on

I never thought personally that yucky tasting medicine or hot sauce was very good to do. My daughter had a "rake" put into the roof of her mouth by her dentist and it had pointy pin like spikes in it that poked into the tops of her fingers when she tried to put them in her mouth to suck. She STILL sucked. I thought she must REALLY need those fingers to endure that kind of pain, so I made the dentist remove it. Eventually I put fuzzy gloves on her at bedtime and told her she could suck her fingers as long as she left the gloves on. She was willing to do that. Within a couple days she decided not to suck them anymore. She was about 8 years old when we did that. We told her at Christmas time that on Jan. 1st we were starting to wear the fuzzy gloves. she had 2 weeks to adjust to the idea and did great.

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S.P.

answers from Seattle on

I think the splint is a blessing in disguise. It will be a hard several nights but it might be worth it. My fervent thumb sucker son at 3 1/2 fell and hit his front teeth on the tub. It was awful with a lot of blood and swelling and pain. We took him to the dentist and the dentist told him not to suck his thumb or it would hurt his teeth. After and ugly 4 or 5 days of crying and waking up in the night he was OK. He is no longer a thumbsucker. He does have a greyish tooth though. Good luck.

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J.L.

answers from Medford on

Hello,
Have you tried nail biting polish. I've heard that works well. It tastes pretty bad.

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E.W.

answers from Portland on

I sucked my thumb until I was 10 years old. I have a slightly larger overbite than people with perfect teeth, but the dentist is really the only one who can tell, otherwise I have beautiful teeth. My mom tried everything to get me to stop. My older siblings also teased me relentlessly to try to get me to stop. The more I was harassed, the more I felt the need to suck my thumb to calm myself. Nothing worked until I decided to stop on my own. When I decided to stop I had to go to sleep with my hands under my pillow. To this day (35 years later) I still sleep with my hands under my pillow. The splint can be a blessing in disquise, don't take it off. If she had a cast she really couldn't take it off. She might not sleep very well at first, but she will sleep and she will realize she really doesn't need her thumb to sleep. If the thumb goes back in after the splint is off, Oh Well! In the mean time help her find things that will relax her before going to bed. Give her some quiet time before bed. I like to be in a room by myself reading or go to bed with soft music playing. At 7 years old you may have to do the reading or get her magazines or picture books that she likes look through. I usually need about 15 - 30 minutes of quiet time, then I pretty much fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow. When I fell asleep that quick I didn't need my thumb.

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