33 answers

5 Year Old Boy... Won't Go to Bathroom First Thing in the Morning...

ok. is it me or is it a perfectly normal involuntary reaction to go to the bathroom as soon as you wake up in the morning. My five year old (new five --as of Jan 1) doesn't wet his bed. doesn't pee on himself ever. has great control. But... every day. first thing in the morning. I say... go to the bathroom. He refuses. He says. He doesn't have to go. Once I make him go of course he goes... but if I were to let him wait, he'd wait a good hour before going to the bathroom on his own in the morning. Is this weird or is it me? Should I just leave him alone.

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Thank you all for your responses...the consensus...Leave him be. He'll be fine. I was worried because he could develop a UTI or something like that but you all tell me the same thing...this kid has better bladder control than I do. Counting my blessings. Thanks all.
S.

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He's five years old and he doesn't wet the bed? I'd say this child is in control of his bodily functions and knows when he's "got to go". I bet if you leave him alone, this issue will disappear.

1 mom found this helpful

My daughter is three weeks younger. Does the same thing! Drives me nuts because I keep thinking about UTIs, etc. I just treat it as continued potty training and remind her to go. My husband does same. Keep reminding him until he just does it.

My 6yr old did the same thing when he was five. His daddy started saying he was going to beat him to the potty and go first. That was all it took! (competitive little boys...husband included!)I was worried too, thats why daddy stepped in but it seems like its pretty normal from all the responses you've gotten! Good luck!

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He's five years old and he doesn't wet the bed? I'd say this child is in control of his bodily functions and knows when he's "got to go". I bet if you leave him alone, this issue will disappear.

1 mom found this helpful

Just leave him be. If he doesn't pee his pants then he obviously knows when he has to go. My 4 year is the same way. Sometimes he'll go, if he sleeps in, but usually he doesn't. It's an hour or more sometimes. As long as he's not peeing his pants, why does it matter?

Leave him alone unless he starts having accidents. My 25 year old son doesn't "go" first thing in the morning, but I do. It's just that wonderful diversity of life. There are more important battles to select ;)

My son is 6 and has a similar "habit" in the morning. When he first gets up he is not interested in going, although I am sure he has to. He is often very slow to wake up and begin moving. However, once he starts getting dressed & the cold air hits his parts, it is a mad dash & I better not be in his way.
T.

If he is not wetting his pants, leave him alone. Perhaps he just doesn't like to be told when to go. AF

Sounds like my son who is 7. He won't refuse he just tells me he doesn't have to go but will go if I make him. He's been doing it since he was 2 1/2. He would wake up with a dry diaper and not go to the bathroom til 11. He's had days now where he'll go to the bathroom at 7:30 before bath and not go til 3:30 next day after school if I forget to remind him in the morning and by then he is bursting. I can't figure out why he won't go either. But usually he goes around 10 or 11 next day still a good 12-15 hours. With him there are better things to do than go to the bathroom I guess.

My son just turned 5 on December 21st. He does the same thing. I honestly have never viewed it as a problem. He just goes when he has to go. He has always been able to hold it from an early age so this is not unusual for him. He will pee before bed and then can got 1-2 hours (sometimes more) before he will pee in the morning. I try not to let him go past the 2 hour mark but I normally don't have to remind him. He goes running to the bathroom when he is ready, lol. Now, if we are going to be going out running errands etc., then I make him go BEFORE we the house but other than that I let him do it on his own.

My five year old daughter is the same way. She takes awhile before she goes to the potty in the morning, usually about 1/2 an hour after she wakes up, right before she has breakfast. I think what causes this is that our bodies are producing anti-diuretic hormone while we are sleeping (this is what keeps adults and kids from wetting the bed while asleep) and it takes a bit longer for it wear off in children than adults. I have to go right when I wake up, especially if a cat is laying on my bladder! Maybe the ADH is a bit more concentrated in kids than adults because their bodies are smaller. I don't nag my daughter about, she does go before she leaves for school. So I wouldn't worry about it in your son.

In my opinion he's not going because you want him to. I would leave him alone. He apparently can take himself if he wants to but you should no longer be in control of him going and he's trying to show you that you don't have control you just want it. I would leave him alone. NOW if he's going to school on the bus and peeing himself on the bus i would make sure he went before leaving the house BUT from what you've said he's not having that trouble so i would leave him alone.

My 3 year old is the same way. For a long while, I made her go potty when we got up anyhow, but eventually decided just to let her be and see how it goes. She wakes up, eats breakfast, and sometimes will be an hour before she comes to tell me she has to go potty. She doesn't have any accidents, and hasn't seemed to get any sort of a bladder infection...so I guess she is fine! Everyone is different...even when it comes to our first potty break in the mornings!
K.

It's normal. My 6 year old doesn't wet the bed and he doesn't go to the bathroom first thing. Neither does my perfectly normal 3 year old. They go within the hour of waking up. Don't make a big deal over nothing. They know when they have to go.

My 6yr old did the same thing when he was five. His daddy started saying he was going to beat him to the potty and go first. That was all it took! (competitive little boys...husband included!)I was worried too, thats why daddy stepped in but it seems like its pretty normal from all the responses you've gotten! Good luck!

It's normal. Most kids don't have to go the first thing like us old people do!

I say what's the big deal?? Just let him go when he has to go.

Neither of mine has ever gone first thing in the morning. I would just leave him alone.

i agree with you, especially since my daughter doesn't always go before bedtime almost 12 hrs earlier! But my daughter doesn't go either. I wouldn't worry about it since he is reliably potty trained. When I try to force the issue she just gets adamant. I decided it wasn't worthing fighting about.

both my daughters hate to go as soon as they wake in the morning. And they aren't dancing around or holding themselves. They go when they have to go. The idea of emptying when the body doesn't insist, is for an older body, one not so young and in the moment. Leave him alone, as long as he stays dry and you don't have to leave the house before he does go, you need to show you trust him.

My youngest (5 year old boy) is the same way. He usually goes an hour or so after he wakes up. Sometimes he doesn't even go before heading off to preschool. I have gotten used to it now but I was worried about it at first.

My son had excellent bladder control at that age...better than me. Also I found that he didn't like to go first thing in the morning because he would be a little hard...if you know what I mean. He could go better after a few minutes of being awake. I would let him wait personally unless you are trying to leave the house and he still hasn't gone. Even today at 16 my son can last longer than me on road trips.

My daughter does the same thing. I remind her to go but she says that she does not have to. I try to give her a little control over that, so I do not push the issue with her. After a little while(usually about the time I am trying to leave for work) she decides that it is time to go.

My thought on the subject is that this is one thing that they know they can control, and they take that and run with it. They know they should go, but because it is what "we want them to do" they choose to wait.

I would say just let him do his thing.

Don't worry about it. My 4,almost 5 year old does the same thing. Unless you have to run out the door right when he gets up, give him a few minutes. He'll go when he has too. Good luck.

Hi S.,

I have two teenage daughters who have different bathroom requirements.
My 19 year old has always gone to the bathroom in the middle of the night and first thing in the morning when she wakes up.

My 16 year old when it comes to the bathroom sleeps all night long. When she wakes up in the morning she does not have to go to the bathroom right away. She just waits awhile before she gets up and goes to the bathroom.

Each daughter is different and I had to adjust the bathroom issue of my younger not having to go right away.

My son is the same way. He will be five on April 6th. I always say he must have a bladder the size of Texas. I say just remind him and when he has to go he will go.

I have a 6 year old little boy, and he is the exact same way. Can't figure out how he can do it, but he does. Mine always refuses too, but when I make him go in he does what he is supposed to do. I wouldn't worry about it!

My son who is going to be 5 in May is exactly the same way. I don't make him go because he doesn't have accidents. I used to make him go, but it seemed like a fight for no reason. Doesn't seem to be a problem for him ever.

Don't worry! My five year old (as of today) does the same thing!

My daughter is three weeks younger. Does the same thing! Drives me nuts because I keep thinking about UTIs, etc. I just treat it as continued potty training and remind her to go. My husband does same. Keep reminding him until he just does it.

My 5yo boy, also argues with me in the morning that he doesn't have to go. He, as well, waits about an hour. My son will have an occasional accident (about once a month), but never 1st thing in the morning, so I've chosen to just let him be. Hope this helps.

S.:

Hello and good morning!

My 6 & 8 year old are exactly like your son. They can hold their bladder for a while. Me? I was "conditioned" to go as soon as I wake up - so if we are out camping or something like that - even visiting someone's home and staying the night - I literally do the potty dance if I can't go within minutes of waking up. I know - funny - but true.

I would just let him be - my boys haven't suffered from urinary tract infections or anything like that - especially if he's not having accidents.

Take care!

C.

My daughter is the same way. I can't imagine it as I run to the bathroom first thing (in fact that is what usually wakes me up) As long as he is not having any accidents it is his way of controlling his environment and at this age they don't have a whole lot of control. So I say just let him decide when it is time to go.

i have a 5 yr old as well and a 7 year old. both boys. the oldest goes first thing and my 5 yr old waits until after breakfast sometimes. i think it's pretty normal. i do agree it's the first thing i do when i get up and since we are on a school routine i make it part of getting ready. i wouldn't worry too much.

Hey S.,

It is normal, I also have a five year old and he doesn't go to the bathroom right away when he gets up as the same thing with my 8 year old. They go when they have to go. If he is not having any accidents at night, I really would not worry about it.
KRW

My daughter is 4 and does the same thing. I thought it was a control thing at first, but there are some mornings when she can go a hour or two without going to the bathroom.

If your son is good about not having accidents and knowing when to go, I wouldn't worry about it.

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