5 Week Old That's Rarely Happy..?

Congrats on your new baby! My oldest daughter wouldn't sleep anywhere for more than 20 minutes at a time until my sister - who raised her kids when the "rule" was tummy sleeping - convinced me to put my daughter down that way. She immediately started sleeping as a newborn/infant should, and I finally got some quality rest. I also made the decision to have my second daughter sleep on her tummy and I'm happy to report that they are now 4 and 2 and they are perfectly fine!

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AAAHHHH! Been there. My first child was the happiest little boy in the whole wide world. My second, OPPOSITE! He is grumpier even now and he's 19 mo. old. We had those times when he just had to cry for a few because holding him was impossible. My doc, different ped docs for each child, had me start my boys on cereal and foods very early. My oldest son was only 2 weeks old when he started and my youngest was maybe 3 months, if that. It really helped a lot. My oldest is now 9 yrs old and the picture of perfect health so I must have done something right. Also, my youngest really liked his boppy pillow. When he was really small, we propped his chest on it to look around from his tummy and set some toys on the floor in front of him and as he got older we used it for support to sit. That pillow saved me, I think because it kinda wraps around them and they feel safe. Good luck to ya my dear. Shannon

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First of all, throw away whatever book you're using to tell you what your baby needs. Your son knows what he needs and wants, listen to him. If he's hungry after 4 ozs, feed him more! I know if kids sleep on their bellies it's suppose to create a higher risk for SIDS, but if that's how he wants to sleep, let him! I do think that you're asking for a lot to be able to sleep 6 hours in a stretch at night. After all, he's just an infant. It's exhausting getting up every 3 hours, but if that's what his body needs, then that's what you have to do. Just as adults are all different, so are babies. If they were all the same, they wouldn't be any fun would they? HA!! Does your son take a pacifier? I know some babies just have a stronger suck reflex than others. If you're not opposed to it, you may want to try to give him a paci. Babies are suppose to gain a ton of weight in the beginning. I'm thinking they're suppose to double their weight by their 3 month check up. Enjoy your little man!

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I could have written the 1st part of your post myself! I have a daughter who just turned 2 yesterday and another who is 5 months. My oldest was the EASIEST baby I've ever been around. My 2nd is COMPLETELY different! I have cried a lot because of it. Not because I want a different baby, but because she sooo "high needs"! She basically has two modes- sleeping and crying. I found this article that really helped me to understand that this is her personality & has also helped me learn different parenting strategies. I feel like I can be a better mother to her now.

http://askdrsears.com/html/5/T050100.asp

Have you tried "wearing" your baby? A sling really helped our sanity!

At 5 weeks, it is completely normal for your son to be waking every three hours. (My 5 month old is waking every 2.5-3 hours.) On top of that, he is probably gearing up for his 6 week growth spurt.

Re: how much your baby is eating- I'm assuming you're bottle-feeding. Bottle-fed babies tend to over eat because they *need* to suck and will finish a bottle to satisfy this need even if they are no longer hungry. This could be why he's crying- too full and with an upset stomach. It is NOT a good idea to be feeding a baby as young as yours 6-8 oz/feed. Have you offered a pacifier or your pinky finger after the bottle to try to soothe him?

Just know that even though you have a "high need" baby, he's his own person and derserves to be treated that way. This is something that took me a LONG time to learn! :)

Hi H.,
I know what you mean about the statement. I have made that statement several times. My son was first and I couldn't have asked for a better baby. My daughter was born almost 2 years later and she cried from the moment she was born. It turned out that she had a milk allergy. If their tummy's hurt they will want pressure on it and that may be why he will only sleep on his tummy. If their tummy hurts then they may want to eat more because they don't know how to fix it. I am not saying that this is your issue, but you may want to try a different formula. Try a soy formula and see if this helps the issues. If this is the issue, you should see improvement within a couple of days. It really doesn't take long to see improvements and you should both be a little happier. My daughter would cry all day long on and off, and then constantly from 7pm-1am every night. She would only fall asleep on me and I think that is where she was getting the pressure on her belly because I wouldn't lay her on her belly. You may want to talk to your doctor and see what he recommends. It took a year and me switching doctors for someone to finally take her crying seriously. They just kept telling me it was collic and it would go away at 3 months, then 6 months, then I'm sure I was just that crazy mom to them who was so paranoid. Mothers do know best, and if you think there is something wrong then there probably is. Good luck!

H.,

I had the same child! She was allergic to her formula. We adopted her at 2 days old and she cried and cried. She would eat a ton and then 15-20 minutes later she would cry for 1 hour until she dropped off to sleep (on her tummy) for 15 minutes. We had to go through many changes with formula to find the right one. She ended up on a soy formula. Ask your Dr. if you can change. Some babies don't tolerate the iron in the formula or can't handle the milk product. The problem is it takes about 4-5 days until you know if the formula change worked. But we found that letting her sleep on her tummy gave us more time to sleep too. Make sure he doesn't have any blankets around him and that the sheets are tight on the mattress.

We also found that she reacted well to soothing noises. She liked the vacuum cleaner and the fan on my stove! We would pull her bassinet next to the stove and turn on the fan. She would calm right down. I tried to tape-record the vacuum and the fan but the effect wasn't the same. :)

Keep trying new things and get some help. I didn't ask for help from friends and family early enough. My husband and I ended up with walking pneumonia when she was 3 weeks old. Try to arrange for someone to come at Julia's nap time and watch the baby to allow you to sleep. You might need to turn on a fan in your room to sleep or put in earplugs but it will be worth it.

I'll be praying for you!

my daughter was born feb.28.she had the same things.not sleeping on her back,wanting to eat all the time,and being fussy while awake.her ped.diagnosed her with acid reflux,with a little bit of colic.i'm not sure if this helps.

I know hearing stuff like I'm about to say rarely makes you feel better but here it is. IT WILL GET BETTER. That is exactly how my daughter was. She had to be held ALL THE TIME and hated her swing. She was not a great sleeper and nursed every 3 hours for a long time. Babies eat what they need to grow not an ounce less or more so just follow your babies cue and don't worry about that at all (although I had planned on exclusively breastfeeding there were times when I just couldn't satisfy her so I would follow up with formula if I needed to). Eventually she slept longer & longer & slowly began to be happy on her own but it took a long time. At the time I was going through it I distinctly remember wanting to jump out the window because I thought to myself "I will never have a life again". Well she is 16 months old and has been sleeping 10-12 hours a night (straight) since she was 9 months. She still eats like a horse but at least it doesn't require my breasts LOL. Hang in there, this will all be a funny memory sooner that you think.

My oldest daughter was 8lbs 11oz at birth, and my youngest was 9lbs 4 oz. They both progressed really quickly to 8 oz feedings. Their appetites tapered off, though. They never went beyond an 8 oz bottle -- they just got there faster than most babies. If you think about it, though, it makes sense that bigger babies require more food to sustain them. Some babies don't weigh 8 or 9 pounds until they're 2 months old, and the "suggested feedings" are based on an average-size infant (probably 6 pounds or so).

Incidentally, your son may sleep longer and be happier if his tummy is full. To me, that was the beauty of having big babies - they were GREAT sleepers because they stayed full longer.

In case you're wondering, my girls are 8 and 5 now, and they're not overweight at all. My oldest is very average, and my 9-pounder is now a little peanut for her age. :)

H.,

I went through this same thing - and am still going through it. My first was a perfect textbook infant. She slept for six to seven hour stretches at two months, had very little throw ups, was easily sated by using the "Happiest Baby On the Block" methods. Good sleeper, good eater, happy all the time. She was a dream.

Two and a half years later, came Sam.

He's been a high maintennance baby from day one. He is a light sleeper - rarely more than an hour's nap. He wakes frequently - only lately have we been able to get more than five hour stretches out of him. He's restless and demanding and I've been thrown up on more times than I can count with him.

But when he reaches out and smiles at me, I know it's all worth it. All babies are different, as are all people. You can't really count on the second baby to be anything like the first. And more often than not, siblings end up being polar opposites of each other. Having to care for a newborn while you are still meeting the needs of your first child takes more patience and strength than anything I can think of. So cut yourself some slack. It's hard work!

If you've exhausted everything - swaddling, shusshing, rocking, white noise, vibrating bouncy chairs ... I guess the only thing I can suggest is a change of venue. Weather is getting warmer, try a bouncey chair outside. Or the car. Or a playyard in the backyard.

As far as letting him sleep on his stomach ... I am not going to be the one to say it's okay. But just so you know, my 9 month old slept with a blanket - also taboo - since he was three months old. It's his lovey and as much as I know it's not a good idea, I know he sleeps better with it. And there are many women on this site that say they've allowed their infants to sleep on their stomachs because that was the only way the little guys would sleep. So, no, don't allow it (nudge nudge wink wink).

Good luck to you and your family. It gets easier, I promise.

J.

I had so many of the same problems as you do when my son was an infant. My son ate 10oz every 2 hours until he was about 4 months. yes, I'm serious, he almost ate us out of house and home as his formula costs $25.00 for a little can do to stomach issues. He doubled his birth weight in a little over a week. I thought that I was overfeeding him as well, and he did get really chunky at one point, but then he grew. Now 3 years later the dr. told me he will be about 6'5". Did I mention I'm 4'11"! He always cried unless being held and would only sleep on his stomach. I finally gave in and let him sleep on his belly. You are not a bad mother if you do this I promise! It does get better. My son is now very happy and nice to be around.I hope this helps you out alittle.

M.

My 1st NEVER cried and my second was a TERROR!! He only slept on his stomach to and I eventually let him. I tried to make sure he had a paci before bed to decrease the risk of SIDS. I also made sure the monitor was very close to him and turn up LOUD in my room so I could hear him breath.
I breastfed my second and he was a VERY hungry baby. My milk didn't come in until a week after we got home so I would breastfeed him until he stopped...usually an hour. THEN he would take about 4 ozs more for the first 2 weeks. At about 3 weeks he was getting milk from me AND taking at least 4 ozs from a bottle. I fed my babies until they were full. They were both chunky until they started walking. My 2nd is now 22 months and he is THE SWEETEST child. When I think of all that crying and whining he did when he was a baby, it's like a different child now. He's still a little clingy but when he comes to me and tells me "I love you" or askes me to hug and kiss him over and over again, I forget about it!
Him being a whiny baby obviously didn't stop me from having children cause I'm pregnant with #3!!
Good luck!!

My mom said the same about her third. My sister was colicly...her first two were not at all. She had the neighbors doing laps with my sister in the middle of the night because in the summer with no air conditioning...the neighborhood was up with my mom! My sister did grow out of it! My sons half brother (his dad's second child) was a very unhappy child until he was able to get around and do things himself. I mean seriously we though he would NEVER smile. He was only happy when Daddy had him and that was that. He got to walking and smiles and laughs a lot more now. There's hope.
Belly sleeping--GREAT for naps when your awake and around. :) The more belly time they get the better they develope, the faster they are able to get rolling and crawling and sitting and walking (yes all that from belly time!) Its not suggested at night (you have obviously heard the "back to sleep" lecture) because infants are not strong enough to move their heads if they get into something (face down in the matress, up against the bumper, ect.) and it could cause suffication. Back to sleep has decreased SIDS by 97%! On that note-yes I have heard of many people putting their infants on their stomach to sleep at night (even in these days) because they need sleep. No doc. would ever tell you it's ok until they can roll. Once they can roll, they will roll to their stomaches on their own and it's ok to leave them that way. :)
Some say mothers know best right? :)
Feed until he's no longer hungery. Maybe he just needs one more ounce to satisfy him and he would be so much more content---reliefe for you! Try to feed him til he stops a couple times, if it comes back up it's too much, if it doesn't he really wanted/needed that much.
Congrats on baby #2! You're doing great Mom!

Okay, my son loved sleeping on his belly from when he was a tiny baby. The reason for it was that he had a lot of air bubbles going through his tummy and laying on his tummy made it easier to for him and made him more comfortable. He was not a big baby at birth but he almost doubled his weight within the first month. He ate constantly and was pretty chubby. At 6 weeks he nursed on both breasts and when I pumped, I pumped at least 4 oz out of each breast so I know that he did get about 8 oz per nursing and he ate every two hours!!! Please go with what your pediatrician tells you. A three hour stretch for a five week old (in my opinion) is too long. If I remember right, my son was about 4 or 5 months old, when my ped told me that he could go on a 3 hour stretch. Which my son didn't go on until he was 6 months old and eating cereal in-between. He was always in the 80 and 90 percentile for weight and height. At 11 to 12 months, he pretty much evened out. He eats normally... I think it was just in his genetics to grow so fast and his body needed the nutrition to keep up with the growing. It might be the same for your son. So, please feed him when he continues to cry for more and just know that when his body has caught up, he'll slow down with eating by himself. You really cannot overfeed a baby this little b/c they know when they have enough.

H.,

I think that this is a fairly common temperament for newborns, and if you have another child, they will be different still. We have peanut butter and jelly three different ways at our house! Some babies are just not comfortable without a great deal of help. Our last wanted to sleep on her belly too, I would check with your pediatrician about it first, but we eventually gave in and let her sleep that way. As soon as he can roll over himself, he will sleep that way!

As for the feeding, he knows how hungry he is, so feed him more and maybe some of his fussy nature will resolve. Our oldest was never happy untill I quit trying to nurse her exclusively and fed her formula, she took 9 ounces the very first time I gave her a bottle at 6 weeks, she was hungry!

Good luck!
M.

I had a boy first and he was at 8 oz feedings at 4 or 5 weeeks. I was breast feeding and could not keep up. I started supplementing almost immediately. He was a little heavy for his height, but he is now 3 and exactly on track. I would take your drs. advice and feed him more each feeding. I had a really good sleeper, but only because I let him sleep for the first 3 months swaddled in his car seat. He would not sleep on his back or side in his crib. He would also not go to sleep on his own. I had to hold him until he fell asleep. I finally realized he always slept whenever he was in his car seat and from that point on, I let him sleep in his car seat and he slept all night long. He slept in our room right next to our bed, so I was always right there whenever he was sleeping. We all got better sleep at that point and he eventually went to his own bed and is a good sleeper.

I now have a 9 week old daughter who is very different. She falls asleep on her own, but she must sleep on her side. She sleeps very well in her crib and I am able to keep up with her as far as breastfeeding goes. I have not had to supplement at all. She is still at 4 oz feedings.

Every child is different. Remember, you know your child better than anyone else.

I think it is funny that you have a daughter named J. (my name) and I have a daughter named Hollyann which is similiar to yours:-)