5 Month Old - Screaming When Put down to Sleep

G.,
This is going to sound cruel, however if you can stand the crying for a while and allow your child to learn how to put himself to sleep you will be doing both of you a favor. I did it with both of my children and waited until they were both one. It was horrible to listen to however i was so tired from not sleeping through the night that i finally did it. I think the older they are the longer they cry, so if you do it now i think you will be doing both of you a favor. A child learning how to soothe themselves is the best gift you can give them. It is tough to listen to the crying so put on your ear plugs and try it. I guarantee by the third night the crying will stop. Just remember as long as the baby is fed, changed, and doesn't have gas he is fine and is only trying to teach himself how to go to sleep. We are all guilty of allowing our children to fall asleep breastfeeding or bottle feeding and then they do not learn how to put themselves to sleep independently. If you have to strength to listen to it just keep checking the baby every few minutes talk to him and tell him its bedtime and then walk away, eventually he will stop crying and put himself to sleep. Good luck!!!!

if he seems at all sick, make sure he doesn't have an ear infection.

He is at the point where he is aware of his surroundings and will wake up as soon as you put him down. My son was the same way around this time. He had been sleeping really well up until that point too. Start a sleep routine- change him, shut off the lights, read a story, nurse and then sing a little song while you hold him for a few minutes (not until he is asleep) and put him down and say good night. Find a small stuffed animal or one of those really tiny security blankets to put in with him. My son hugs his and talks to it before he falls asleep. As long as he is not screaming, leave him in there to talk to himself and figure it out. If he is crying, then go back in after a few minutes and pat him a little or just speak to him soothingly for a few minutes. You have to differentiate between crying and whining too. If he is just whining, leave him alone. If he is able to roll over on to his stomach on his own, maybe he would be more comfortable sleeping on his stomach. I put my son down on his back and he rolls to his stomach to fall asleep. It's a big transition to get them to sleep on their own, and it's something you have to work at and be patient with for the next few months, but eventually they will figure it out. Also, try putting him down a bit earlier. It could be that he is already overtired and fighting sleep. Around this time I started putting my son to bed around 7. Now that he is 5 months, he is old enough for a schedule. It does not have to be rigid but try setting up a routine to feed him about every 3-4 hours and get him napping at 9 AM, 12 or 1 PM and maybe a 1/2 hour nap around 4, and put him to bed for the night at 7, or even 6:30 if he seems extra tired.

G., my last baby did the same thing and it was difficult to deal with, but I have tried some things. I have tried the Teething Tablets to see if perhaps he was teething. My first son got his teeth at 3 months and my second son gto his at 4 months and my third one who is now 10 mos old got his at 6 months. I also noticed that he was hungry too just like my other two boys whom I started cereal at 3 months because they weren't getting enough to hold them til morning. Another thing is to see if perhaps he's coming down with something and nursing is comforting him. He may be sick. Don't do the method I have shared following if he's sick. Sometimes you haveto let them cry and trying that method if you want to. My third son, it's difficult to use that method because he throws up if he cries too much or too long or too hard. So, I usually let him cry during the day if he is tired and doesn't nap that way I can keep an eye on him and he will begin learning to soothe himself hopefully. He is sure different from my other two boys. So, those methods of letting him cry may or may not help and other mothers disagree with the method but you need to do what is best for you and him. He may be teething and nursing helps to soothe him but putting down is another story and they know from cause and effect. If I cry when she lays me down, she'll pick me up unless he's sick and I have found that tend to be the case too sometimes. It'll pass at some point but you need to do what is best for you and him too. Let us know how it worked out and I'll pray for you and him.

G.,
He may be going to sleep with the reasurance that you are there but then wakes up in the dark and on his own and doesn't know what to do...so he screams! Try putting him to bed drowsy but not totally asleep so he can learn how to settle himself to sleep. It may take several nights for him to figure it out (he will probably cry a bit) but don't give up! It will be worth it when he is sleeping better! Good Luck!

Maybe the baby is having a growth spurt and needs extra nursing.

Also, if you are interested in "attachment parenting" solutions, as opposed to Ferberizing (cry it out solutions) see Dr. Sears site: http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070100.asp

Just thought I would add that last, since others had offered the other.

Hi,

Try reading The Baby Whisperer.
http://www.amazon.com/s/qid=1218637501/ref=a9_sc_1?ie=UTF...

Works great if you follow it just like anything.

Good Luck.

As long as you've ruled out any medical problems (ear infection, etc), it's probably just time for you to start putting him to bed BEFORE he falls asleep. That way he can learn to rest quietly if he's not quite ready to fall asleep just yet, or self sooth (thumb sucking, rubbing his chest, humming) until he falls asleep on his own. I freaked out the first time I heard my one baby humming about 1/2 hour after going to bed (who's humming in the babies' room!?), but sure enough he was just doing for himself what I had been doing for him previously.

Start a bedtime routine if you don't have one already, even if it's just sitting quietly and reading a book after nursing him so he "knows" that it's bedtime. Since he's already a good napper, before true sleepiness sets in read the same bedtime book and then put him down for the nap. I'm a strong believer in consistency and therefore removing some of the uncertainties from a baby's already overwhelming world. Once he knows that nap/bedtime is coming, he'll be much more likely to cooperate.

I just went through this with my 18 month old when I stopped nursing. If you are stopping the night feedings then you will have to stick to your guns and that is the only way you are going to win. I had 3 nights of screaming for 2 hours plus but I held him and talked to him and did not get angry at him. They do not understand the change and up to now when they cry for something it works so it should work for this too. Before he stopped nursing during the night he was a very light sleeper and would wake up if you touched him and then of course he wanted to nurse. Since he stopped he sleeps so soundly and you can move him without waking him. It was a rough few nights but you can do it...... after all you gave birth and that was harder :) Hold him and kiss him and talk to him....... and try to remember during the crying you cannot give in or this cycle will never stop. This was a much harder process with my son!!! My little girl I told her we were not going to nurse anymore and she pretty much never asked again....... she was 12 months old. It really gets you down to the core when they cry so hard but just try to think that this too shall pass. If you are not stopping the nursing the same thing would apply. Do not let him fall asleep while nursing and let him be awake when you put him in the crib so he understands. If he goes to sleep with mommy and then he is alone when he wakes up ......... he does not understand. You just have to be loving and talk to him..... you will do great!!!!!

The best I can advise is to read the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby" by Dr. Marc Weisbluth. I read it, and my son was sleeping throught the night at 5 months, no feedings in the middle of the night or anything. The first night I followed the plan in the book was very difficult, but it got easier and easier and now my little one on most nights will go to sleep and stay asleep.
I know others that the book has worked for as well, so if you stick to it I believe it does have success.
Good luck, and catch as many Z's when you can
A.

have him checked for ear infections. the pain increases when lying down.

You should rule out reflux.

Have you tried swaddling him after feeding and before you lay him in his crib. it worked for my grandson.

Doubly make sure he doesn't have an ear infection at the doctors or is sick at all. Second, cut down on the nursing before bed, sometimes babies (like mine) will come to expect it to use to fall asleep with, especially when you take it away. Sometimes teething may be the issue too, he may be using you as a pacifier to soothe his gums. Maybe leave a teething ring with him at night or offer him some tylenol at bedtime. But, if you have outruled all of the above, then I would start to let your baby go to bed awake and cry, with you checking on him in timed intervals, increasing intervals each night or each time you check on him. Just don't check on him right away. Make him wait for you to come, the crying will get worse, but he will slowly learn patience and the chance to soothe himself back to sleep or to sleep on his own. It took my baby almost a month of doing this, but we would see vast improvements in behavior once we stuck to one routine. It took almost a week before our baby would just put herself to sleep and not at the breast. It isn't easy, but it does work...I swear by it! When you know your baby is healthy and fed and has been up no more than 2 hours then start this process even for naptimes. My baby (7mths) is a much happier baby, and us much more well rested parents due to this process. I'm actually trying to work on the wake, eat, play and sleep plan. I never understood it before because my dd ate all the time and slept very little for many months. Now, I think that this plan sounds very good to follow. Babies defintly need structure. Your profile says that you have two older children, did you do anything different with them out of curiosity?

G.,

Have you checked with his pediatrician? Perhaps something is bothering him, or maybe, since you're breast feeding, he is no longer getting enough milk to satisfy him, so he's screaming because he's still hungry?

Since this problem just began recently, something must be different. I think your first step should be seeing his pediatrician to see if he can find a cause for what's happening.

Are you sure he's not getting an ear infection?

G.,

After ruling out any physical causes like ear infection, reflux and teething, try reading "The No-Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley. Please do not leave your infant to "Cry it Out" new medical information shows that this is not effective sleep training and not good for the baby's developement.

Good Luck.
R

Hi G.. I went through a very similiar situation with my now 13 month old. He began teething at 5 months and wound up getting both his top and bottom teeth within the space of two weeks. Sometimes when they begin teething you can't even see the teeth yet, but they sure can feel them. My son just needed some extra nursing time. The sucking soothed him I guess. Maybe a little Tylenol or Motrin before bedtime would help if he is in fact teething. Good luck.

Hi G.. Your baby could possibly be teething or gassy. Once you know what is wrong you can try to help him. I'm sure mom and dad are tired and that leads to crabby. If he is teething he would be biting you. Hope you can figure it out. My best, Grandma Mary

G.,
It *might* be what my son went through. He lost his carseat due to height early on. He was sleeping through the night, everything.

Teething started. Not a good scene. Long story short, he wanted to be held until he went to sleep. Mostly, it was being upright. He slept in his swing for a good portion of the night; eventually I would nurse him and put him in his cradle/pack-n-play. When he woke he generally screamed his head off, unless he had gotten a REALLy good night's sleep (then he was sunshine and roses - what a smile! :). I'd nurse him and he'd go back to sleep.

The pediatrician said something early on about teething, and not being able to lay him down. I don't remember much of that conversation. So I tried his car seat, and when he outgrew that, his swing. When he outgrew that, I would hold him in my arms and do the baby rock (his ear on my chest, my hands clasped under his bottom).

He is JUST starting to want to settle himself after nursing. I rock him a bit, he tries to get comfy, room is cool, he is dry and warm, light's are off, music is going, and he just couldn't get comfy in my arms, so I tried putting him down earlier than usual. He tucked his hands behind his head and snuggled into the mattress, and presto, he was asleep.

Anyway, point of all this is: he would magically awaken whenever he hit the 10 degree mark - lower than 10 degrees and he was awake and crying. 20-45 degrees, and he was a happy, sleeping camper.

This is what worked for us. Lotsa people disagree with it, but I'll take my boy sleeping and peaceful over crying and unhappy any day.

Hope you find something that helps,
Good Luck,
M.