4Yr-old "I'm Bored" in the Car

Updated on February 13, 2013
F.M. asks from Spring Branch, TX
25 answers

We live out in the country. So the quickest trip we take is 25 minutes there, 25 minutes back. Lately, I hear "I'm bored" every day from my 4.5 yr old son in the back seat. He wants to watch a movie or play a game on my phone. Um, no. You watched a show at home this morning, and no, you may not play on my phone. He's gone 4 years without a word of boredom, (granted yes I have in the past let him watch a movie on the dvd player in my car), but now I don't know - he's getting to that age? We have done the alphabet game (find signs with words that start with a letter). I end up finding most of the words. We've done the colors game - find a red car, then an orange car, etc. Then we switch to signs of certain colors.

Help me out, ladies. Please suggest fun games for a pre-reader. He can read some words but not enough to entertain himself in the car. I would LOVE suggestions for favorite CDs/artists that you and your kids both like. Us - we like Lucas Miller - the Singing Zoologist. But I only have his albums on my ipod, and don't have a dock in my car. Maybe I should buy the cds - but tell me MORE cds that you suggest as well! Any other suggestions - I appreciate anything!

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So What Happened?

Wow Thanks everyone for all the suggestions! Currently my son is sitting on the couch with his magna-doodle. So perhaps I just need to remember to say "Honey, we're leaving in 5 minutes, pick a toy/game you want for the car." We do have a couple of toys in the car as well, but those have apparently gotten boring. I thank you for the musical/cd suggestions. True, I do love to listen to MY music and MY talk radio. A bit of variety would make me happy too though. Hearing my son sing along would be the most-gratifying and he's just not catching on to the Christian music I'm playing - although he does ask me about Obama a lot since he's mentioned on talk radio! I will check out those artists/albums some of you mentioned. I know I know, I did get him "hooked" on the dvd player. I guess I'm just getting to the point where I'm annoyed that he's automatically wanting to be entertained. Sorry! Try entertaining yourself! I don't want to produce a zombie-child who doesn't even see the world around him. I appreciate those of you who said to tell him "tough!" Brainquest - I have one of those! THe one I have does require a little reading though. Hmmm. I will check out Costco this week too. Oh and why do I want to omit the phone and dvd? - true the phone has some educational games.And I have downloaded many of them. I guess I just prefer that he save the games for when we have no other option (at a busy restaurant where he's the only kid and bored with adult talk). DVDs - perhaps if I got some educational ones I wouldn't be so anti-dvd every car trip. So this week I may get Signning Time and Leap Frog from the library.

Thanks again ladies!

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C.R.

answers from Seattle on

I didn't have time to read, so sorry if there are repeats. We have:
- dry erase board and markers w/erasers on the cap
- books on CD. My daughter LOVES this!
- magna-doodle
- etch-a-sketch
- sing songs: Old McDonald, London Bridge, made-up songs
- rhyming game: rhyming random words - mop, flop, stop, crop, top, drop
- I-spy
- alphabet game - we don't actually FIND the words that start with the letters. We just think of words, any word, that start with that letter.
- coloring books w/crayons and stickers
- Brainquest cards. Some they can't do if they can't read, but several they can.
- book of mazes and dot-to-dots

We have a small rubbermaid tub in the back that she keeps everything in.

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A.W.

answers from Kalamazoo on

My kids always loved their MagnaDoodles in the car! Keep some toys in the car that are ONLY for in the car so that way they are more special.

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S.R.

answers from Washington DC on

Get a CD called The numbears multiply by phil snyder. My dd learned all of her multiplication at a very young age without even trying. We played it in the car every time we drove. Kids love the songs and they will remember all the words. Believe me, this was the best thing I ever did for my dd's education!

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M.F.

answers from Phoenix on

My kids have never watched movies or played on my phone/iPad in the car, not even for the 6 hour drive to Disneyland or the 2 hour drive to Tucson with no other adult. We listen to music (satellite radio, iPod stuff, CDs-real music, not kid stuff), we sing and we talk. I do keep a cloth box of random toys and books in the car at all times. It's where my almost 4 year old can reach it, so she can read or play as she wants. I don't entertain my kids non-stop in the car though, because I need to concentrate on the road, not on playing games with them.
Don't get sucked into feeling like you need to constantly entertain your son while in the car. Provide toys or books for him to entertain himself and talk with him, but some quiet time of just looking out the window and seeing the world is good for him. If he complains of being "bored", suggest he read or look for certain things, but let him do it himself. Suggesting taking a nap usually will light a fire under a bored kid to figure out how not to be bored quickly. :-)

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

I Spy books. We got several for DD from Scholastic. They are portable, and the ones for his age group have a picture of the object along with the words. My DD can entertain herself with them without needing anyone to read them to her.

If you don't have an iPod dock in the car, get a portable speaker (I have one that runs on batteries) or an adapter. Artists we like include BareNaked Ladies, They Might Be Giants (Science, ABCs....) Choo Choo Soul, Imagination Movers and Phineas and Ferb. You can also get a number of books on CD, many of them will come with the book and the kid can look at pictures while the CD plays. Skippyjon Jones and Shel Silverstein are available this way.

I also keep back issues of kid magazines in the car for DD. She may not be able to read, but she can look at the pictures of the animals. We just signed up for High 5, but she's gotten Ranger Rick Jr and National Geographic Kids, too.

And if it's a longish ride, have a "car bag" where you can toss the bag to him to explore whatever you stuffed inside that he doesn't get to see much. Maybe a new book or toy he hasn't seen yet. The $1 bin at Target is great for trinkets.

But also don't be afraid to say, "Well, that's all I have" or "What do you want to talk about?" vs finding an electronic.

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B.F.

answers from Dallas on

I second CDs from the library. Hank the Cow Dog! Adventures in Odesey, anything Wee Sing!
Ask your children's librarian!

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J.S.

answers from Chicago on

I guess I'm in the minority that thinks he is old enough to entertain himself in the car. Kids need to learn how to be bored. They need to learn to entertain themselves without electronic devices. Your job is to drive the car and not entertain him and you should tell him that.

I think it's great to have some things that are only in the car. We did Magna Doodles too. But it's only a matter of time before he throws whatever toy aside and says that he's bored again. Do not start listing things he can do. Let him be bored and see how he handles it. Don't answer the whining, say what you'd say at home, "I can't hear you when you whine." and then turn up the music.

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T.H.

answers from Kansas City on

I don't think it really matter if he can't read the words, you can take favorite books that he might know by heart and he can read them to himself. Even if he doesn't know the words, it's fun to look at pictures, you can glean a lot of the story from that.

I would maybe let him pick out some toys from the dollar store or something and put them in a special car bag that stays in the car. My kids will sometimes take little action figures or stuffed animals to entertain themselves. Color Wonder markers aren't bad either if you're going to be there a while.

CDs are great, but I will warn you, once you start kids music it is hard to break away! ;) Maybe some old classic rock CDs might be better! LOL!

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M.L.

answers from Colorado Springs on

Look at all the answers you already have! Wow! I'll just add this: The B word (the one your son says) can be a power tool. "I'm bored" can mean, "Pay attention to ME!" And it's all the more fun because your son knows you actually need to pay attention to your driving.

It's perfectly all right to ban the B word. Try some of the suggestions you've received. You and your son could put together a little basket of "boredom busters" for the car, but you can also say, "We're getting in the car in five minutes, Keith, so if you want to take anything to do, this is the time to get it." At four and a half, your son can take a bit of responsibility for his own time.

Some kid CDs can be a lot of fun for you both - there are some that won't drive a parent crazy in five minutes - but the CD player belongs to the car, not to your son, and you *both* use it.

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

Back in the day, I purchased , borrowed from the library, and rented children's books on Cassettes. Of course now you can rent, borrow or purchase them on CD..
There are tons of titles

Our daughter also liked "Brain quest", question cards. .. I saw them at Costco this last week. Our daughter and I talked about how much fun they were on car trips and at restaurants.

I put together a red tackle box that had all of the car activities in it.. This way she could carry it into a restaurant or a friends home if they did not have children.. I used to add surprises every once in a while.

Paper and stickers.

Flashlight or a book light that clipped onto her car seat.

little cars, finger puppets

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D..

answers from Miami on

He knows that a movie is possible in the car because you introduced him to it. You've let him play with the phone before. He's whining because he wants what he wants and whining is how he hopes he can get it.

Put together a bag of "goodies" that are only in the car, and switch them out with new ones every so often. It's not your job to entertain him while you drive. Expect him to entertain himself and don't give in to the whining.

Good luck,
Dawn

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K.C.

answers from New London on

Good for you for not allowing all this media in the car. It sounds as if he did have it though. He is testing you and he wants the DVD player on again.

I do not think you have to occupy him so much ! Listen to YOUR favorite music station, listen to some kid CDs, talk about what your day will be like and what you pass on the rd. Have quiet time, too. This will teach patience.

My kids are older. They sat in the car and we talked. I would never have a tv in my car, but, if I did---It would only be used if we were driving to a vacation destination.

Give him a word of the week on a simple index card ! Tape it to the back of your seat. I don't believe in all this tech stuff so early ! Kids need to learn conversation and patience.

A basket of plain books are gd, too.

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A.G.

answers from Houston on

Small cookie sheet with magnets. We got a magnet set where you had to put together different kinds of robots.

Use a small notebook to color in. That way you won't have loose paper all over the car.

Picture cards with math, letters in them - punch holes in them and tie them together or use a gorilla clip.

Have 1 or 2 of these things for him to do - 1 for on the way there, 1 for on the way back. Make him wait 5-10 mins before you pull it out. Let him know you won't be pulling anything out early.

If all else fails, have him practice tying his shoes!

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K.S.

answers from Miami on

Put some kid music on while driving like Wiggles etc. Give him a few books with activites like color wonder or even a connect a dot. It will help him learn his numbers and create something. Just no pencils just big markers or crayons in case of bumbs.

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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

I second classic rock. We listen to a lot of Queen in the car.

My daughter has books she can only have in the car, little first readers and stuff. If she can't read a word she spells it and I try to tell her what it is. Or she just tells me the story, which is hilarious, like the book she has about Willie the Wildcat getting ready for the big game. When I read it, he didn't have any sort of adventures in the jungle like he did when she read it. :-)

Also, we play an alphabet/animal game. We say the name of an animal that starts with A, then the next person has to say the first animal plus come up with an animal that starts with B, and so on and so on. It's a memory and alphabet and animal game. Fun for everyone! :-)

Or sometimes we take turns telling stories. Her stories always end up cracking me up, like watching Written by a Kid on Geek and Sundry. http://writtenbyakid.geekandsundry.com/ Episode 4, Rainbow Town, reminds me so much of my daughter. It'll be all hearts and roses, then a ghost attacks a fox and a vampire has to save it. :-)

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

So you let him watch TV at home and obviously you let him play on your phone at home, so why can't he do those things in the car? Personally, I would think those would be good things for the car, and then have him do reading or other play at home.

btw, not everyone can read in a moving vehicle. It makes me sick.

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K.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

Through Discovery Toys, I sell a game called Games on the Go. It's a deck of 50 cards, each one with a different game to play in the car (or anytime you are out or traveling). It is for ages four and up, so it's perfect for your son. Since he's not reading, you would need to select a few in advance to play, since you can't read them while driving.

For CDs, my kids LOVE Justin Roberts. His music is upbeat, fun, and not annoying for parents. Our favorite of his albums is Meltdown, but we have several that we like. We also like the kids CDs by They Might Be Giants and Barenaked Ladies.

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V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

My kids always liked Laurie Berkner. They were fun. My husband hated most of it, but he wasn't in the car with the kids as often as I was. ;)

You could teach him to read... then he could just bring books. That is what my daughter and son always had in the car. Daughter STILL brings books for every car trip. No matter how long/short.

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M.P.

answers from Portland on

So, why is it that you don't want him to watch movies in the car anymore? At 4 he could probably play some preschool games on your phone? He could play preschool games on your phone. Many of those are quite educational.

We didn't have the phone, portable DVD player or tablet when my grandchildren were that age. After the first couple of times of making suggestions on what they could do we just told them, whining wasn't acceptable and stopped responding to them. They found ways to entertain themselves with the coloring books, books, toys I provided only in the car.

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M.M.

answers from San Antonio on

Get the book "Carschooling" by Diane Flynn Keith. You can order the hardcopy or you can download it. You can get from her website: www.carschooling.com . There are over 350 different things your child can do while in the car to keep them entertained and educate them at the same time. Happy reading!

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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

Saw this when googling ideas.

http://pinterest.com/pin/44191640063912813/

If you have an iPad, apps have some great learning games for kids, and many are free.

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S.R.

answers from Odessa on

"I Spy" is a great game in the car. My grands love it. They like to look for things in the car - outside the car that are visible that hopefully they see and you have to guess what it is. When you do, then it's your turn. Storytelling CD's are wonderful or even books on CD.

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J.T.

answers from Victoria on

my daughter is now 3 since birth she has been a horrible passanger it started to rub off on my son. They both are candy freaks and rarely get candy. But I began bribing them with no treats if you arent good in the car. Its working well.

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P.B.

answers from Houston on

My kids liked Joe Scruggs - that was years ago, don't even know if he's still at it!!!!

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L.G.

answers from Austin on

We have created a generation of "It's all about me," "Take care of me," etc. When our kids are small, they rely on us completely but as they grow, we need to begin to teach them how to do things on their own. We need to teach creativity, that it's okay to be bored sometimes, that staying bored or doing something else is their choice, and that it is not Mom's job to make sure you are not bored. I heard of one mom who always answered, "So what are you going to do?" when told her child was bored. I'm not sure what age that child was...

We can be there to offer suggestions from time to time, but you need to help your son figure out what his options are. I am so glad that you are not the kind of mom to just hand him the cell phone. We are becoming a society where the cell phone is the most important thing to us - more so than the people in our lives!

As a high school teacher, I saw kids who needed stimulation non-stop, because that is all they knew. They were bored in class if I didn't entertain or stimulate them constantly. That is probably kids' #1 complaint about school - it's boring. And we wonder why our education system is so inefficient. We have to teach kids who have been wired differently.

Make sure that your son has many opportunities for creativity. Show pleasure and pride in anything he does that demonstrates creativity. So many teachers today complain that our kids are coming into high school with no clue how to create. They just want to know the easiest and quickest way to get something done so they can get back to their phone, video games, etc.

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