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45 Minute Intruder

Hi there - I have an awesome new baby who is 12 weeks old (3 months next week). She's doing very well with sleep at night, but she will only nap for 45 minutes at a time during the day. The routine is 45 minutes of sleep, awake for a hour and a half. she feeds every 3.5 to 4 hours, as we're trying to get her on a regular schedule. I know she should be sleeping 1.5 to 2.5 hours every 4 hours (as per the babywise method) but the naps are 45 minutes on the nose. I've tried to settle her in the crib - not for very long - but she is wide awake and ready to play after 45 minutes. So I let her get up, we play, and within an hour and a half she's sleepy again.
I'm inclined to think this is OK, because she is a happy baby and a good night sleeper, but I keep hearing that it's not enough day sleep (it works out to around 4 hours of napping a day). Did anyone else have this problem and how did you deal with it. Should I really be worried at all? The only real problem is that it's hard for me to get much done because her naps are so short. Thanks!!

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thanks everyone for your advice. i'm relieved to know i'm not the only one who has encountered this problem, and it sounds like it's not much of a problem at all. i'll just keep doing what i'm doing and see how her sleep patterns evolve.

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My son did the exact same thing. It drove me crazy because it didn't give me enough time to do anything around the house or for myself. Trying to chane it was a huge and futile exercise in frustration. I had also been following the Baby Wise method. He just grew out of it on his own and eventually settled into 2 longer naps a day at around 5 months. Good luck.

Hi, I'm a single mother of a 3yr old little girl, and I never listened to all those baby sleep methods. Even when I learned other babies wake up at 6am every day and crau sh in the evening. I'm a night owl, and my daughter is too. But I'd say as long as she's healthy and happy she's doing fine, I think the settling into regular rhythms of night and day sleep and not napping is when she is older, for now, you are doing great, and if you need to adapt her rhythms at all try gradually waking her up from certain naps earlier and let her sleep later for other. You'll be more tired if that's at all possible, but have hope, someday you will catch up on sleep. Just not this week. take care.. S.

Thank the lord that her sleep is great at night!!!! You can still get stuff done while she is awake, you will just be interrupted more. It is actually pretty cool that you can go grocery shopping without having to wait for her to wake up. I wouldn't push it, if she is sleeping well at night THAT IS SO HUGE!!!!!

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Hiya, I'm in the same boat with my 10-week old. He sleeps like a champion at night but is very alert during the day and fights going to sleep. Initially I just accepted that he would not sleep during the day -- at all, not even 10 minutes -- but when he started getting bags under his eyes, I thought I should keep trying to get him to sleep! A friend gave me Harvey Karp's video (http://www.thehappiestbaby.com/), and I have managed to get him down pretty successfully using some of his techniques. However, I am thrilled if he sleeps 45 minutes, because for the first 6 weeks or so he got almost no sleep during the day, which certainly wasn't god.

Since using the Karp techniques, I am much better at settling him, but rarely does he sleep more than 45 mins -- sometimes only 20 or 30. Once he slept about 2.5 hours, but I have not seen a repeat performance of that at all. Sometimes he sleeps at the breast or on a walk.

Like yours, mine seems quite happy and healthy, so I am not terribly worried. I'd be interested in others' take on this.

1 mom found this helpful

We had the same problem with our son. He just did not want to nap. If she is happy and thriving then don't worry too much. My son is now 9 months and he still doesn't nap very well but sleeps all night. I think it is better for mom to sleep all night.

Hey there,

We are having the same issue at present. Our baby is 2.5 months and slept for only 45 minutes at a time during the day as well. She sleeps pretty good at night with only one middle of the night feeding and wakes in the morning anywhere from 5:30-7:00 a.m.. She was not a happy baby during the day with her 45 minute naps. She would wake out of the nap crying and I would assume she was hungry so I would go get her. She was initially interested in the bottle, but only for a few minutes and would never even take a half feeding. Now that I have learned of the 45 minute intruder we wait it out for 5-15 minutes. She usually settles herself back into sleep, and is a much happier baby during the day now when she is awake. I can totally relate to the frustration. I too could not get one thing done during the day.

Hi, A.. I just wanted to let you know that my baby who is now 9 months old did the same thing when he was that young and even now. He's just not a big napper. He would do 45 minutes here, 20 minutes there, etc. but otherwise he was happy, he seemed energized and ready to go. Other mommies also were concerned because he wasn't sleeping the 18 hours their babies were sleeping but I asked my doctor and a dula and experienced mom of 8 and they say that it's fine. As long as he is getting some naps and doesn't seem cranky or tired from not getting enough sleep, to not worry about it. Some kids just don't need that much sleep. Which is exactly like his dad. I have a hard time understanding this, because it seems like I can never get enough sleep (even before baby) but my husband can be fine w/ 6-7 hours of sleep. :) I say all this because just as adults, kids are all different. I have other mommy friends that their baby's are sleeping 12 hours a night, and that has never happened w/ mine. He sleeps 9-10 hours a night max. and takes a couple of naps during the day. ANyway, sorry to go on and on but I just wanted to let you know that it sounds like your little one is just fine. Take care and God bless!

each child is different some at that age only sleep all day and are up all night as long as she is sleeping all night i would not worry. if she started to be awake durring the night then she would not be getting enough sleep. you can also try to put lullaby tapes in her room.

My 1 year old son - identical pattern! and to this day, he may go up to 60 minutes, but that is rare. Just realize, all kids are different - and plan accordingly.

I see you got a lot of responses so I am hesitant to reply. However I just have to tell you that I have a friend's whose baby does the exact same thing! Between the two of us, we have read every book and tried evey sleep method that was mentioned in the below responses. I did read one book (the Sleep easy Solution) that said, it doesn't matter what your baby naps as long as they are happy and playful during the day. I just want you to be aware that you may try all these new "sleep training" methods and realize that after months of frustrations and trying... none of them work. Your baby, if she is happy during the day, is probably just a short napper. :)

I truly believe that every baby (just like every person) is beautifully unique! You shouldn't be worried at all...just see it as a blessing that your baby wants to hang out with you so much! ;)


We had the same challenge. Somewhere around 5-6 months our daughter finally started to take 2, 2 hour naps instead of the 3 - 45 min. ones. Our dr. said as long as she seems happy and acts as if she has had enough sleep it was fine. Not all babies sleep like it says in "the books". Use your "mommy gut". I loved baby wise too but not everything is going to be the same or work for your baby and you can really make yourself nuts over it. She will be sleeping longer before you know it. hope this helps. J. M.

When my son was 3 months he also took "short" naps. He totaling approx. 4 hours/per day and my pediatrician said that was fine. She was not worried at all with the amount of sleep he was getting. He started to consolidate his naps to 3/day at 6 1/2 months.

Good Luck!

That's what she needs for now. Her naps will get longer as she gets older, it's great you're already working on a schedule! By 3-4 months they really start a short a.m. nap, 2 hours after lunch and another short p.m.

Hi. If she's happy and content then she's getting the sleep she needs. My daughter didn't take long naps either.

Don't worry about it. As as long as she seem happy and she's slepping well at night, then there is nothing to worry about. My daughter is almost 6 months old and only sleeps about 20 minutes at a time during the day, but sleeps most of the night. All babies are diffrent. And don't worry about trying to get things done while she is napping. Rest while she is napping and then start your work after she gets up. She'll enjoy watching you.

Hi there A.,
I have three children. My oldest was a dream child. Napped twice a day for 2 hours each time. You could set your clock by his naps. Then my next child was a 45 min at a time napper. My third child did not nap until she was ready to nap. They are all sooo individual. If your baby is happy and healthy, keep on keeping on. No worries. Worry just stresses mom out and my belief is that if moms okay then the family can bloom and grow. Breathe deep and let your child be the individual that will grow into an amazing adult thanks to your loving example and nurturing. Be the blessing.

Hi A., I just went through the same thing a month ago. Reading all of the books and advice online I thought there were very specific guidelines as to when and how long my little one should nap. After trying repeatedly(and failing) to get her on the schedule I thought was best I just started noting her natural nap times and planning around them. Week by week her napping schedule really worked itself out naturally to be more like they say it should be.
As long as your baby is getting about 4 hours of nap time during the day she's doing great. Especially if she's also a good night sleeper too. I just wish someone had told me when I was in your position that even though you want it to be - not everything you do for your baby has to be exactly by the book!
Good luck and best wishes!

45 minute naps are totally normal. My baby girl did the same thing, sometimes shorter.....and she was always a very happy baby. I would suggest not reading the books and listening to your instinct......your the mom and you will know what is best. My daughter is 8 months and still gets up during the night and I always have people throwing me advice on what to do. I'm fine with how things are and as long as you are, then that is what matters. Now when people ask me how she is sleeping, I just say fine and don't give any details and it has helped. Good luck!

my advice to you would be to throw out babywise. I am a doula and I hate that book because it makes moms wrong. It sounds like you and your baby are doing great. Every baby has its own rhythm. And to me, night sleep is way more important. Enjoy your baby and toss out that book!

Don't worry. My daughter did this, but as she gets older she will have longer naps.

Bottom line. Every baby is different. Books that try to put babies on a schedule do a disservice to new parents as well as their child. Your daughter is an individual, different from anyone else on the planet. Would you want it any other way? My firstborn NEVER napped during the day. Ever. From day one.If we happened to be in the car or out strolling he would fall asleep, but never at home. Imagine my surprise! I'd been told (and read) that all newborns slept a lot, and that all babies napped. Not mine! He went on to be a delightful child and is now 22 years old. Baby #2 was a sleeper - he could sleep through anything. Baby #3 was a normal napper. Your baby is on a schedule that works for her. She is happy and healthy. As the old saying goes ~ if it ain't broke.......
Enjoy your sweet little girl!

All babies are different. I have 3 and none of them slept according to "the book." Your baby will tell you what is right for them and their body. Your precious baby sounds perfectly happy with her own schedule. If you can, work around her schedule, this will make her the happiest. Trying to get my kids on my schedule makes grumpy kids because I like to go longer then they do BUT it is possible to get multiple kids on the same schedule! :)

As for house or other kinds of work...this will ALWAYS be there. Your baby will only be this little once. I love using a bouncer. At 3 months she will enjoy watching you fold the laundry and other little chores like that. Enjoy baby, they grow much too fast! :) Soon enough, she'll be going through all your drawers and cupboards and cleaning them all out! ;) This age is great, you got the smiles and they don't move too much. hee hee. Every age is fun! Good Luck!

If you're not getting enough sleep because she's not sleeping enough, wake her up when she starts falling asleep so soon after her too brief nap and feeding. Try and keep her awake just a little while longer, with walks, singing, talking, hanging out at the park or the mall where there's lots of other stimuli.

Another possiblitliy, are you nursing? I noticed that when I drank coffee (a requirement to keep up with my older child who also just refused to nap), my second baby (also nursed) would stay more awake. I wasn't trying to keep her awake, i just needed the caffeine. But I think it went through my system and into the baby, which, of course, affected her resting ability. Tea also has caffeine.

My cousin had a similar problem. Her daughter's resting periods were so brief my cousin was in sleep deprivation mode for the first 6 months, and working full-time too! She supplemented with cow milk and taking turns with hubby to care for baby. Cow milk sits in baby's stomach longer and can help baby sleep longer because she doesn't get hungry quite so fast. Wetting or pooping in their diapers also woke both my girls from a sound sleep.

Good luck, new mommy! Just remember, it's just a phase!

I have 4 children and I did this for all four children. When they wake up I changed them and fed them. Then I played with them or read baby books to them. Then after 45 minutes of them being up I made sure they were dry and then I put them down for their nap. They all slept for 45 minutes and then they would stir. I would leave them in their crib and not go into their room and they would go back to sleep for another 45 min. Then I would get them up and begin another round. The babies sleep lightly during the first 45 minutes and they sleep deeply during the second 45 min. It is normal for them to stir during this half way time. Retrain your baby to do this and you and baby will enjoy it more. Do not play first and then feed. You need to feed first so their belly is full to play and then it is getting empty while they sleep so there is no crankiness. I began my babies with breast feeding every 3 hours then we increased it to every 4 hours. I took a class at a local church called Growing kids God's way and it taught me all this and more. God Bless you. D. Hadley

Hi A.--I read your letter and had to write. There is awesome book to help you get through this sleep issue. It is called The Baby Whisperer by Tracey Hogg. I don't know if you have heard of it, but it is a great resource for helping with all sorts of baby issues. She really helps you understand your baby in a different way. Her methods are a softer approach than babywise (which I did with my first baby), but still very scheduled. I used this book for my last 4 children and was much happier for it. I think that letting your baby "cry it out" when they are young is absolutely a mistake--and was happy to have a different approach available. I am a firm believer in scheduling and believe that it has lasting, positive effects on our babies. Through scheduling I have a house full of kids who all go to bed at 7:30- wake up at 7:00 (we have school)-and my little ones take good naps during the day. So I know it works and how great it can be even as your kids grow up (my oldest is 8). Children thrive on schedules--they need to know what is coming up next for them--just as we as adults do! Back to you now, the author of this book just teaches us a new way to communicate and understand what our infants are trying to say--and how to deal with any sleep issues. About the 45 minute sleep pattern--this is normal. Babies sleep for 45 minutes before they go into REM (deep sleep) and the author gives you tools to get your baby past the 45 min spurt and into a deep sleep. Don't worry--it will happen and you will get some time--not much, but you will get some. Hope this helps, good luck! D.

There are so many adjustments when you first have a baby...and you sound like you are doing so well with them all.
The best is that you are getting some sleep at night! That is a major accomplishment, and because of that, I would put up
with ANYTHING during the day.
Best Wishes,

I encourage you to throw that Babywise book in the diaper pail and get a better book - maybe Dr. Sears' The Baby Book. And continue trusting your instincts regarding just watching your baby's patterns. Babies don't need schedules - they know when they're tired, when they're hungry, etc. It's adults who stay up when we're tired, eat when we're not hungry, etc. A pediatrician, Dr. Aney, has such concerns over the Babywise method that he has devoted his time and money to providing documentation to any who request it, explaining how Babywise is unhealthy. http://www.ezzo.info/Aney/aneyaap.htm.

She may also sleep longer if you wear her in a sling - the movement of your body may keep her asleep. I'm not talking about the baby bjorns, infants' legs dangle from those and they prefer to be swaddled at this age.

Good luck,

Hello "new mother of one", I wouldn't be alarmed or worried. If you aren't do so now, try playing soft lullaby music on low volume to set the mood for sleeping in her room or where ever she sleeps. The first time may not work but if you are consistant than she will get use to the soft sound and may sleep a little longer. I hope that helps.

A., it all sounds fabulous. Let it be and enjoy your awesome baby.

Hi! A.,

She didn't read the book and will probably never follow any of the baby rules. If she is happy and healthy, I wouldn't worry about it. I know that a lot of people think that the baby wise book is really great, however, I have a grandchild whose mother follows that line of thinking and she will not sleep any where except her bed. That means that they always need to be home for her nap time and at bed time. As a mother of 4 and a grandmother of 5, I would just count my blessing at a baby who sleeps well at and and pray that the next one reads the book.

Don't worry mom, she is fine, and yes it is hard to get anything done. Your are getting her done, and she will change, just be more patient. No child ever fits someone elses idea of what they should or should not do. All is ok. You will adapt, she will change, again and again.
E. H

Hi A., let me begin by saying you are the mother of that little bundle of joy and you should know what feels and works best for her as it shows in her night time sleeping patterns. I too am a first time mom of a 13month old girl and boy let me tell you if I had a dollar for everytime I let a book, another parent, or any other source tell me what should be best for my daughter, I'd be a rich woman. My point is, I had to learn on my own what suited her best and not listen to anyone else! She to this day only sleeps half hour or less at nap time and always has been a "cat-napper" since she was new born. There is no set time for them to sleep, it is what works best for their little bodies. Hope I was a little help, God bless you and your little mommas!

Don't worry, my son was the same way. She will change soon to taking 3 naps a day, then 2, then 1 nap a day probably sometime after she turns a year old. 40 minutes is the time of one sleep cycle, so she's waking up after that. I always said I would rather have good night sleeping than daytime sleep. Your baby sounds completely normal to me. Remember that they change about every 2 weeks! And I have never gotten anything done during the day!!

I have a 4 month old daughter and I would be lucky to get her to sleep even 45 min every 1.5 hours, but she's thriving and happy. This is my second child. I also had problems with my oldest when it came to sleep when he was a baby. He's perfectly fine. I think you just follow their lead and not that of an "expert." They also eventually tell you what their schdule will be and at about 6 months fall into a 2 nap schdule that will allow you a bit more freedom.


All I can say about sleep issues is that I wish I had never read any of the books ( I think I read them all.... ) and just followed my son's cues. He clearly did not need as much sleep as the books insisted he should have needed, and I spent two years trying to get him to sleep more and better. I was so frustrated every day about him taking so long to fall asleep for nap and then waking up shortly after all that work, and then he didn't sleep through the night! I finally gave up and let him take the lead, if he fell asleep on the couch while reading a book, then he napped for as long as he wanted, if he didn't, then he had no nap for the day. And you know, he finally started sleeping through the night when I didn't make him nap, even though he was much too young to give up naps according to all the books! If your baby is happy, then she doesn't need any more sleep. I know how inconvenient is to have a kid who won't sleep, but that's something I've had to remind myself of, parenting isn't about convenience, it's about giving your all to your child, especially for their early years. I say, forget about a rigid schedule, your child will make one of their own that changes every few months as they grow and change, and throw away the books! Your child and you can figure out what you need, when. Remember, only YOU are an expert on YOUR child. Good luck! and nap whenever you can :)

If she is happy she is sleeping enough. There is no magic number of hours a baby should sleep during the day. Everyone is different. My oldest slept a lot... sometimes taking 5 hour naps and still going to bed on time and sleeping for 12 hours. My second took pretty short naps for a long time and no matter what she woke up everynight for a few minutes until she was 9 months. Now my 8 yr old sleeps from 8pm to 7am and my 2 yr old sleeps from about 9-9:30 pm to 6:30-7 am. The 2 yr old only takes 2-3 naps a week and only 1 - 1 1/2 hours.

I know you are trying to follow the baby wise book though I would caution you to take the advice lightly. I used the method with my first and threw the book away with my second. There are more loving ways to accomplish what this book teaches. If your daughter wakes up before it is "time" for her to eat then don't feed her right away, just keep her up for a while after she eats, unless of course she's hungry when she wakes up.

Hi A.,

No, don't be worried at all. My 10 year old didn't like to sleep that much, and in fact by the time she was nearly 2 she didn't often nap during the day at all. Even in the car at 3 months old she wouldn't fall asleep. All babies are different, and I think as long as she's sleeping on and off for those 45 mins, she's fine (you might on the other hand need someone to come and give you a nap).
I would pop her in one of those light weight baby seats and just carry it around the house with you, this way you can get things done and she can keep an eye on you and you on her. Anywho, my 10 year old is highly intelligent and an amazingly social and a well adjusted sweetheart. To this day she still wakes up really early.


i would not worry at all. my youngest, who is a girl was also a very short napper. selfishly i would have liked her to go down longer but she was happy and slept well at night. so i'm of the belief if it's not broken don't fix it. every child is different and what may be statistically normal amount of sleep for most children doesn't always apply to everyone. if you're happy and your babies happy then go with the flow.

Laid back L.

I have a 9 month old son. He did the same thing only his naps were only 30 minutes at a time. I tried everything, but it was 30 minutes every time. However he was sleeping through the night by 2 1/2 months. Then my sister told me to follow his lead and try to let him establish his own schedule. Only now at nine months he takes a 1 hour nap in the morning and a 2 hour nap in the afternoon. But I know it is frustrating, I couldn't get anything done either. Save the big projects for when Daddy's home! Good Luck! K.

My daughter was the same way. Every child is different, and if she seems happy, just go with the flow. Trying to push her into a routine that doesn't fit her will probably just end up giving you both headaches. I completely understand wanting bigger blocks of time to get chores done, but don't worry, eventually the naps will get longer on their own. Sounds to me like your baby is doing just fine!

I know this answer isn't very helpful - but some babies are just like this. I was pretty scheduled with my first daughter and did all of the right things - but she never slept longer than 30 - 45 minutes. And she didn't change that habit until she was 18 months old and went to one nap a day.

Wish I could tell you that you could change it, but I would just keep up the routine and hope they start to sleep longer. My second time around (twins) I did the exact same thing and they took long naps. Just different kids, I think.


I'm a married mother of two babywise kids. My second child (now 6 months old) also consistantly woke up after just 45 minutes (like clockwork). My suggestion is to give your daughter time to settle back down. When my son woke up (after napping for 45 minutes) ... I would wait a few minutes ... then pick him up after it appeared that he wouldn't return to sleep. However, one day ... purely by accident, I was on a work call and couldn't get to him in a timely manner. And guess what, he feel back asleep! Since then, I've been giving him 5-10 minutes to settle back down and it has been working. He continues to stir 45 minutes into his nap (never had this problem with my daughter) ... but he always falls back asleep.
Don't know if this will work for you but it's worth a try. It may be hard in the beginning to hear your daughter cry ... but the crying for me got shorter and shorter ... now, he just "stirs" for a little bit and goes back to sleep. Good Luck!

I totally understand what you are talking about. My son is 5 months and he rarely sleeps longer than 30-45min during the day and he has never really taken good naps. He sleeps well at night and he is also a happy baby. so I don't worry about. i think if he is happy he must be getting enough sleep. We have to remember every baby is different.
Best of Luck
M. C

Thank the lord that her sleep is great at night!!!! You can still get stuff done while she is awake, you will just be interrupted more. It is actually pretty cool that you can go grocery shopping without having to wait for her to wake up. I wouldn't push it, if she is sleeping well at night THAT IS SO HUGE!!!!!

I think your baby is absolutely fine! I have three and all of them have napped differently. It may not be easy on you since it probablly seems like you just put her down and she wakes up. One suggestion is to not let her fall asleep eating. I'm not sure if you do but try it and see if you just lay her in her bed to sleep awake if it makes a difference. And be happy that she sleeps at night! Good luck!

It sounds like you have my oldest. Some babies are insomniacs. My oldest dropped her nap completely by the time she turned 2. She sleeps 12 hours a night though and she is 4 now. I think you are doing great.

Hi A.,

It sounds like your baby is doing fine. I mean really, does the woman who wrote babywise know you or your baby? No. You know your baby. Treat all those books as a guide, not the end all be all of child rearing.


Relax. Trust your instincts. Do all the adults you know get the same amount of sleep? Do they all have the same eating habits? Why do so many "experts" seem to think there is a "right" way to treat a baby? Every person is different, from the time they are born. Heck, mine were different in the womb. My first nursed so often I was exhausted (which may have been due to poor latch for the first few weeks, but she still was an avid nurser) and gave up napping by the time she was three. My second slept so much my breats leaked all the time and she napped all the way through kindergarten. The first one pooped five times a day; the second pooped once every five days (at least for a few golden weeks at the beginning there!)--and they are both healthy girls.
Don't expect to get much done when you have a 3-month-old. Their needs are immediate at this age, and you have to work around them. Luckily those needs are simple. As they get older, their needs become less urgent but more complex. Enjoy this time, when you can meet their needs so easily. And sleep when you can. :)

Unfortunately, I don't have an answer for you, but I'm so glad you asked this question because I have a 13 week old and we're having the exact same problem! Whatever we do she just wakes up after 45 minutes during the day. It's really frustrating. I never had this issue with my first. I'm hoping someone has some helpful advice, in the meantime, I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone!

Little Tyler is doing the same, and he is developing by leaps and bounds...
Drives you nuts cause, like you said, it dosnt give you much time to start any major project, or even NAP yourself....With Tyler, he just wants to be up and part of whats going on. He loves attention, goes in his swing, analyses images on tv, and really LOVES when I put on a Rock 'N' Roll DVD....He gets right into the rythems, tapping and kicking, like a drummer...
He also likes to play air guitar...(I have a picture)....Led Zepplin is his favorite so far...
So, weve adapted and know, this phase wont last for long, untill the next one...It's 8 am as I type this, and he is sitting on my lap, finnishing a bottle, giigling and maybe, ready for a NAP!

My son did the exact same thing! I remember it being frustrating because he didn't nap for a longer period. I would rush to get myself ready during one nap and then rush to do the laundry during another nap, head out to a store for another nap or go on a walk for one nap. It seemed crazy, but he changed over time. The 4 40 minute naps then changed to 3 naps and he lengthened the morning one. Then he switched to 2 naps, still with the longer one being in the morning. Finally at a little over a year old he went down to one nap a day for 2 1/2-3 hours. He is 2 now and is still an amazing sleeper at night (at least 10 1/2 hours solid) and nap time.

I read the Babywise book too but I just couldn't get into it. I let my son choose his own sleeping pattern and tried to stick to his routine. Of course it was difficult to clue in to when he wanted to shift that routine to fewer naps, but it always worked out if I watched for his tired signals (rubbing eyes, a little fussy) It really worked for us because now he just toddles off to bed for nap and nighttime. I still try to stick to a fairly consistent time for him.

I would say that if your daughter is wide awake and happy that her sleep cycle is through for that time and that's all she needed. The only time my son wakes up crying is if he hasn't had enough sleep. When he was little I would try shhhing him back to sleep and sometimes swayed him in my arms. Now I can go in and shift his blankets around, make sure he is comfortable and tell him to go back to sleep for a little bit. Then he wakes up bright and happy awhile later.

Oh, and you might look into how much total sleep she should get for the day and night combined for her age. For a 2 year old I think it's like 12-14 hours and my son gets a total of about 13. I think I found that info on babycenter.com

Don't worry; I'm sure your little girl will change her schedule when she's ready. Nothing seems to stay the same for very long at that age! :)

My first baby only slept 20 minutes at a time. She was tired at times but for the most part was fine with it. She was and still is a very happy and healthy little girl. I stressed out about it for months - she slowly started to sleep longer around 6-8 mos, taking 45 minute naps. Now at 29 months she sleeps a good 2-3 hours in the afternoon. I use to call her my little cat napper or a power napper.

It was hard for me because I felt like I wasn't getting a break, but what was I to do? She wouldn't sleep and I wasn't willing to leave her to cry it out. Since she was happy and healthy, I didn't want to upset the situation and try forcing something on her she didn't want or apparently need.

My advice is to stay away from books like Baby Wise and Baby Whisperer and instead follow your baby's queue's. Books that encourage a boot camp-like environment, in my opinion, do not create a nice, peaceful setting for baby or mommy.

She sounds like a dream come true :) She's still young and when there's more crawling etc. then she'll sleep less frequently AND longer. They wear themselves out. As for the Babywise method (which I totally believe in) , I'd keep her up longer between the naps. If you can keep her up for close to two hours instead of the half hour playtime between naps, then it seems like she's be exhausted, right? Do what Babywise says, feed her, play with her, do bath or tummy time or walk her around until she's REALLY sleepy. Good luck!

As silly as it might sound, this worked well for me in establishing a good nap routine. I would buckle my son in his car seat, put my laundry in the dryer.... put the car seat on top of the dryer. Yes, with him in it :) The sound and slight movement put him to sleep quickly and he stayed asleep for at least 2-3 hours. When I transitioned him to napping in his crib, i just buckled him in his car seat, and put him in his crib instead of on the dryer. After about 3 naps he simply slept in his crib, finally in no car seat :) Really though, it sounds like she is doing just fine. She will probably just start sleeping longer all on her own. She is just to excited to wake up and play with mommy!

To be honest, I am not a fan of Baby Wise. I know it works for some, but each baby is different. I would recommend Atachment Parenting by Dr. Sears


The key word in your request was "inclined". Follow your gut. My now 12 year old daughter did the same thing as an infant. It would drive ME nuts because I wanted a bigger window of time to get things done, or just to have time to myself. Soon enough, she got into a more "scheduled" nap pattern. I know it is so tough having her wake so often - look at it this way...........she wants you, her mom. Why sleep when you can be with the one that she adores !!!! When she is a little older and more physically active, she will need the longer nap - that's just plan nature. In the meantime, try and find ways to nuture yourself so that you can more easily cope with her waking so often and just "give-in" to it and her unique pattern. I know you are probably thinking "but I have no time to nuture myself!" I remember so well!! Now, my daughters both are the best sleepers we could have asked for............be patient and it will happen for you and your precious new family too !!!

Hi A.,
Don't worry! I thinkk this is totally normal for your child; she may just be one of those kids who does not sleep much. My first child, my daughter, had an almost identical sleep pattern while several of my friends who had daughters the same age were enjoying 2 3-hr. naps a day! It was frustrating because it was hard to get anything done, but it turns out it's just the way my daughter is wired. Now almost 10, she still doesn't need much sleep compared to other kids. She can stay up late and rise early. My son, just 5, STILL takes a 2-3 hour nap on weekends or if I get him home right after school (which is extreme at the other end but he seems otherwise healthy).

Good luck!

it sounds just like my baby. He is now 6 month and naps about 35 min and awake for about 2 hours. He is a very happy and healthy baby. He only cry if he's hungry. My 5 year old child was in the same position. I used to be so worried but the doctor always assured me that he is fine. She said a lot of babies are like that. As long as they are growing no need to worry. They are obviously getting enough sleep,otherwise they will be miserable. Anyway my 5 year old child is healthy too. The only thing is like you mentioned, no time to do anything and that can be frustrating. Please don't worry about it,your baby is fine. Just take time for yourself whenever you can.It;s very important AND ENJOY THE MOMENT BEFORE THEY GROW.

Every child is different. Putting a newborn on a schedule makes no sence, as they will settle into their own pattern. One thing you did not mention, was how you were feeding her. If you are breastfeeding, you should be feeding on demand, usually about every 2 hours. If you make her go longer, she may just be hungry. If you are bottle feeding, then 3-4 hours is probable fine. Let you little one direct their own schedule. As she gets older she will most likely fall into the "normal" schedule, but maybe not. I also foudn with both my boys that they would only take their afternoon nap, when they were really little, if I held them while on the couch napping. They are all individuals, and we love them for their individuality.


No, you shouldn't be worried. Babies aren't "one-size-fits-all," like "Babywise" might suggest. Your daughter is just following her individual rhythm. Don't worry about getting stuff done when she sleeps--just relax! Also, if she's breastfeeding, she should feed about every 2 hours. Be well!

My son did the exact same thing. It drove me crazy because it didn't give me enough time to do anything around the house or for myself. Trying to chane it was a huge and futile exercise in frustration. I had also been following the Baby Wise method. He just grew out of it on his own and eventually settled into 2 longer naps a day at around 5 months. Good luck.

My little guy just passed the 4 month mark. A schedule would be wonderful, but I found out with my daughter (she's 5 now) not all babies can follow them, or need to. As a parent it's a great concept and something that has never worked for me. I have friends who have always been able to plan their day around their child's eating and sleeping schedule, but not me. Even when mine get a sleep routine, it usually changes within a month or two and starts all over again. Your little girl sounds like my boy, and one day you'll get the time you need to get the stuff done. Right now, I put both kids to bed and then run for one hour to get as much done as I can then force myself to go to bed also. Goodluck!

You could always try to push the naps together. Slowly push her up 15 minutes/ half hour, whatever you can get away with, until you get her to her next nap time. I did, more or less, the babywise way. At 4 months Luka napped at about 830 or 9am for an hour and a half or so, at 2pm for about an hour and a half and then at 430 for about 45 min. He also did very well at night. Then again, he has always done well at night.

If it doesn't put you out too much, I wouldn't worry about it. She's going to be adjusting her schedule anyway. She's still so little. I only started to push for scheduling around 3 and a half months. The funny thing is that one week to them, at this age, is a fair amount of time. You'll get her on that schedule. And if she's sleeping a lot at night, she may just not need as much sleep during the day. The fact that she's happy is a big clue that she's getting what she needs. :)

I had the exact same issue with my daughter at the exact same age. She was also a good night sleeper. I have heard really negative scary things about the whole babywise method, but I tried some advice I found in the book the no-cry sleep solution, where right at 40 minutes I would be right there ready to help her back to sleep as soon as she started stirring. To be honest, it didn't really work a lot of the time, but she grew out the the phase really quickly. From about five months on she has taken two naps a day of about an hour and a half each. She is now eight months and is still napping great! Although, I think she still sleeps somewhat lightly around 40 minutes into her nap because if it is noisy she will wake up around then but now puts herself back to sleep pretty well. Just be patient, these phases seem like they are lasting forever, but looking back they are over before you know it. I hope this helps!

There are people who swear by Babywise and people it just doesn't work for. If you're one of the ones it doesn't work for, don't worry! Trust your instincts. My baby didn't conform to it either...he took short little naps for so long, probably until he was about nine-months to a year when he changed to longer naps and fewer naps. He's a healthy two and a half year old now who just takes one two hour nap a day now. If your baby is happy and is growing, you're fine...

Congrats on the baby! Good choice to go with Baby Wise too. We absolutely love it! I would say you instincts are right. She is happy, eating and sleeping. WHat more can you ask from a 12 week old baby? She may settle into longer naps later on (hopefully), but for now, let her make her own routine with your guidance. Have fun!!

Hi A., I am too a first time mother with a now six in a half month old. I have had the same problem. Sometimes she does not sleep at all during the day. I thought for sure something was wrong when my sister, and others were telling me she should take naps. I asked my doctor, and he said it was fine as long as she is happy which she is. He told me "well she is sleeping through the night correct?" I said yes, and his response "you are lucky because most babies do not sleep through the night at this age! You can either have a baby who takes long naps throughout the day and wakes up at night or you can take a cat napper." So I really would not worry. My daughter still will only usually nap for a half hour in the morning and maybe a hour in the afternoon if I am lucky. But she sleeps till 7am or maybe later. So really I would not worry to much if she seems happy. The only thing that is hard is you don't get a break all day long!!!

My daughter was the same way. My advise is as long as they sleep through the night do not worry about the day. My daughter quit napping at a year. Now she is almost 5 and doing just fine. Every baby is different so you can not just go from what a book says. If you little one is happy than I say that you are doing just fine. And babies change their sleeping habits at different stages. Good Luck and enjoy the little one!

I am there with you A.! My little guy (just over 4 months old) sleeps 30 minutes on the dot- we are lucky if we get to 45. At first I was worried that he wasn't getting enough sleep because, like you, I read in books that he should be getting more. However, I've found that he is happy when he wakes up, sleeps well at night and seems rested, so I have come to the conclusion that he just does not need as much sleep as other babies. (which is harder on us moms!) If he wakes up and still seems groggy or is crying, I will try rocking him back to sleep or just giving him his pacifier and rubbing his belly and he will usually go right back to sleep and sleep for a while longer (this is not very often though!).

Sorry that is not super helpful. I found that nothing really extended his napping, so I have learned to accept and love that he is a cat napper. I did put a aquarium mobile (the little kind that attach to the side of the crib) and sometimes I will turn that on with the remote when he wakes up and he'll happily stay in bed looking at it for another 15-20 minutes which gives me a little more time to get things done.

Good luck!

Maybe you could try to keep the baby up a little longer, switch the schudele up a tad during the day, she might be just rested enough after 45 mins, I know my daughter would take an hour nap, be up for 4 hrs take a 30 min nap then down for the night, I counted my blessings I had a good night sleep. You siad she is happy & healthy....

Count your blessings Kim, pick your battles.
She is just being her, a unique doing her own thing sweet baby. By the way why not let her play in her crib for a few more mins she might fall back asllep, if you don't race in to check her, Buy a baby monitor so you can hear what she is doing, if she is not fussing let her have her time to find her fingers & talk to them. Babies loves to talk to the hand.

( Giggles )

Blessings Kim
Your a good mom I can tell.,

Mine are 18 & 16 yrs old now, Thank the stars they can do the dishes...

First of all, poop on babywise.

Second of all, assuming that your baby is getting 10-12 hours of sleep at night, she is just fine. Every baby does it differently, and I guarantee you she will change in a few weeks. Babies need a minimum (although at that age mine was sleeping up to 21 hours a day) of 16 hours of sleep a day, so with four hours every day she should be fine. Also, if she weren't getting enough it would show in her behavior- she would be irratic, irritable, and seem overstimulated. And if you want to get more done, well, don't have kids... just kidding!:) At that age we balanced having Izzy in the sling and playing on the floor by herself, so I could still get stuff done. And consider yourself lucky she goes that long between feedings. At that age Izzy absolutely HAD to eat about every hour.

Hi, I'm a single mother of a 3yr old little girl, and I never listened to all those baby sleep methods. Even when I learned other babies wake up at 6am every day and crau sh in the evening. I'm a night owl, and my daughter is too. But I'd say as long as she's healthy and happy she's doing fine, I think the settling into regular rhythms of night and day sleep and not napping is when she is older, for now, you are doing great, and if you need to adapt her rhythms at all try gradually waking her up from certain naps earlier and let her sleep later for other. You'll be more tired if that's at all possible, but have hope, someday you will catch up on sleep. Just not this week. take care.. S.

My son did the same thing. just recently has he started taking longer naps, like an hour and a half or so... You are actually lucky because my son wouldnt make it 45 minutes.. he would only sleep about 20-30 minutes at a time. He never seemed tired, so I just let him sleep as log as he wanted to. He should be fine.
Good luck!!

Please please PLEASE stop using Babywise. I know it sounds like a terrific idea but before you use it anymore, check out this link authored by parents who regret having used his flawed methods, pediatricians, breastfeeding communities and churches
An exerpt from one part of the page reads ""Babywise and it's church-based counterpart, Preparation for Parenting, promote a one-size-fits-all set of parent-centered rules for sleep, feedings, and wake time. Contrary to their claims, these precepts are potentially unhealthy for the child, and leave parents focused on the clock, the rules, and the book, rather than on what their individual baby needs in order to grow and develop physically and emotionally."

It is completely normal for your 3 month old baby to take shorter naps in the day and wake up for feedings. Some infants need to wake more often to eat too and it depends on their individual needs.
To say that all babies should be eating every so many hours and eating every so many hours is to say that all babies are the same and they aren't.
Some alternative books to read (and approved by Doctors and other specialists) are
The Baby Sleep Book: The Complete Guide to a Good Night's Rest for the Whole Family by Dr. Sears
Or if you're looking for a Christian Alternative (since Babywise is a supposed "Christian Method"
Focus on the Family's -The Complete Book of Baby and Child Care.
There are other alternative resources here for classes and books http://www.ezzo.info/alternatives.htm

I found that my kids would rest longer in the day if they were on me. Try a baby sling or a back pack. You can have two hands free and your baby is happily close to you. Every baby is different and I don't personally think you can say what is "enough sleep" during the day, but I really did find keeping them close made them feel better about resting!
Mother of 3

I did Babywise with my first baby. I works I guess but I loosened up for the next 2 and they are happier kids for it. I don't think 45 min is bad. I found with my son who is 4 1/2 months now if I let him skip a nap in the morning he will take a longer nap in afternoon but sometimes he does only 30-45 min. But, I really believe that your baby knows what her body needs. As long as she is sleep well at night I wouldn't worry.

Babywise worked great for all 3 of our children even though they are all genetically different ( the 2 youngest are adopted). They all slept through the night (8 hours or more) by the time they were 6weeks old. They all take minimum 2 hour naps (sometimes they wake up after 45mins - 1hour but always put themslves back to sleep)!!

Listen to your baby, not some book written by someone who doesnt know your baby! My babys naps are all over the place. She'll take a morning nap and an afternoon nap, but not at a certain time. It can be frustrating at times but shes flexable and I can take her places when I want and if shes tired, she'll nap. Just relax and go with the flow! That was the hardest part for me...losing control. Good luck!

I have 2 daughters (2&4 this month) but they were both like that as babeis. They would just cat nap long enough to reenergize themselves. Both of them pretty much gave up napping at about age 1 to 1+1/2 also. I never really worried because they always had enough energy and slept well at night. As long as your baby isn't lathargic all the time I personally don't think you have anything to worry about :) ( I learned to just go w/ the flow, not by what the books said!)

Don't worry about it. As long as she sleeps at night. As she grows she'll stay awake for longer periods and the naps will merge into 2 daytime naps -- likely longer than 45 minutes. Then as a toddler she'll be down to 1 nap. I've read that gifted children sleep less during the day. My girls stopped napping altogether at 18 mos. (So much for having time to get stuff done.)

Hi, I too follow babywise. I would not stress too much about it. I would ingnore both my kids when they woke up at the 45 mins point and they would babble or fuss for about 30 mins and go back to sleep. After about a week or so they just slept right through it and went the 1.5 or 2 hours that was needed. It is up to you either way your baby will be healthy and happy.
Good luck.

my daughter was a 45 min napper too.. don't worry !

I would say that is pefectly fine!My daughter was a great night sleeper too, but would nap for no longer than 20 min.! She did fine with her 20 min. "powernaps", I would have liked a longer break for myself, but hey, she slept at night! So don't worry, your daughter will be fine. She will most likely increase her nap time as she gtes older and takes fewer naps. My now 21/2 yr old takes one 1-2.5 hour nap every day.

Well I don't think there is any need to be really concerned. All babies are different in their own way. Sounds to me even though she only sleeps 45 minutes at a time spread out through the day that she is getting her sleep. I have a 1 year old who takes only one nap once a day for 3.5 hours and it has been like this since she was around 5 months, so she knocked off two naps(which she used to take). My general understanding is that babies should take several naps a day but in reality some take several short one while other take a few long ones. Just know that this won't last forever she still has adjusting to do to her new world so her sleep pattern will likely change as they change so don't fret I know its hard I have 2 kids so enjoy her while she is still very little.

4 hours sounds like enough sleep to me. 3 months is when my daughter started becoming more alert. She would catnap most of the time and occasionally take naps for hours at a time. Most times she would sleep for 15-20 mins. and wake up energized. If your daughter is getting enough sleep I wouldn't worry to much about the duration/frequency of her naps. Every baby is different.

Hey there,

It may not be the perfect way to sleep for your baby, but what I have come to learn is that no baby fits into any "perfect" anything. My pediatrician added up all the hours of sleep and found that my baby was getting enough sleep for her age. It sounds as though she is happy and content, so I wouldn't be so worried about it. And hey, a good night sleeper, that's great!

Dear A.,

I really do not know exactly how much sleep a baby needs during the day, but my gr grand daughter is doing the very same thing. So maybe that will ease you mind a bit. C. N.

hello A.. 45 minutes is more that what I can say about my niece. My sister's daughter whom is now 9 months naps for only 30 minutes, but sleeps all night. Since she was born & from what I have seen this is her pattern, of course we would love it if she could nap longer...... I have personally put on a timer from when she goes to sleep ( for 1/2 hour) and it hasn't failed so far, 30 minutes to the dot. As long as she's not fuzzy in between, i think this is ok. As she gets older I certainly hope ( for the sake of my sister) she will regulate her daily sleeping pattern. In the mean time, try to get yourself some rest while she's napping.

hi A. -

i laughed when i read your posting. my daugher is pretty much the same way. she naps 45mins to an hour and she's pretty much like clockwork when it comes to waking up. she's 4 months now and has been this way since 2.5 months. we tried everything from letting her sleep in her car seat, crib, bassinet, pack n play and they all worked for a little while but bottom line she's a short napper. oh and my husband even put her in her car seat on top of the dryer and that worked once. and yes, it would be nice that she slept longer to get more stuff done, but our daughther seems happy and healthy. And when she's ready for a nap she pretty much goes down. it does help though when she's a little older to put her in a saucer and that keeps my daughter entertained longer enough most of the time to get some stuff done.

we did talk to our doctor about her being a cat-napper, but the doctor said if she seems ok, then baby just is a short napper. the other thing i heard too as they get older their sleeping patterns will change. so keep your fingers crossed that she's get into the longer napping category!

Just a note to let you know you are not alone, and that there are actually people worse off than you. My niece's son will only sleep for 30 minutes max at a time during the day, and she has yet to find anything to do to change this.

A., let baby do as baby wants. She is not everybody else and thats her way of doing things. This will only be temporary cos with newborns everything changes so quickly. Just remember she is not on a schedule for you or anybody else but for her!! Just enjoy and work around it and stop worrying, wait till she gives you something to really worry about, hopefully that wont be till she's 16!!!

hi, don't sweat the small stuff. You are lucky she isn't doing the 45 min nap in the night. All is well in your new world of motherhood. Enjoy the play time.
I am the mother of 3 girls all of which had different routens of sleep. I say bless the child that will nap at all and sleep well in the night. You are blessed my dear.

My dughter is going on 7 months and I went through the same thing. Its as if they maybe feel like they are going to miss something exciting if they go to sleep. hehehhe She is now taking 2 naps during the day and they are both 1-2 hrs of sleep, and its every 3-4hrs that she wants to nap I think its just that they are growing. But I promise you her naps will start getting longer by 5 months. Oh and be graetful she does good at night Mine just started eating twice instead of 4 times at night, ya not FUN. Be patient and just remember to enjoy your little one because not long from now she wont just want to be in your arms.

It may be just my opinion, but if the baby is happy she is getting enough sleep. Don't sweat the small stuff, they grow up way to fast. Enjoy!


My little guy's one day short of 5 months & it sounds like your baby is doing exactly what he did. People kept asking me 'Shouldn't he be sleeping longer?'. Honestly, I figured if that was when he kept waking up & he seemed rested & happy it seemed fine to me. He's always been a great night sleeper though, sleeping 8-11 hours (give or take) since he was about 3 weeks old. Now he go's to sleep about 11:00 every night, wakes around 8. Get's tired & naps @ about 1 for 3 hours (give or take) & usually again for a couple hours starting around 6. So I'd say don't worry. If your really concerned just call & run it by your pediatrician. I know ours is great & seems to have no problems with my calling her when I'm concerned about anything.

M. B

Hello there!!~

My beautiful daughter is 11 months now and when she was teeny I struggled with the idea of "how much sleep should she be getting?"... I say if you're getting 45 minute naps than THAT IS GREAT! You shouldn't be worried! :-) As long as your baby is happy and you are constantly meeting her needs I say you're doing an amazing job!

I am not a fan of the book Babywise at all because of their encouragement to allow babies to CIO and their absolute need to put babies on a "schedule". Babies are not little machines and they are ALL DIFFERENT. I never stressed about a schedule and my daughter wound up making one for herself... falling asleep around the same time everyday. By following HER CUES we've gradually set our own daily routine. Now she naps twice a day, an hour to an hour 1/2 each and she sleeps 10-11 hours at night... and IF she wakes up in the middle of the night crying I go to her and soothe her back to sleep. CIO was never an option for me.

Babies' growth spurts also affect their sleep. Sometimes they will cause babies to sleep more and sometimes the constant development going on in little babies' brains keeps them up~

I hope this helps!!! Keep up the great work!

Sounds like you are a babywise mama. I am too. My two boys each went through that wierd transition too. I am sure you have all ready let baby cry it out or play it out for a few minutes and see if she will go back to sleep, but if you haven't that would be my first strategy (if you are sure she is getting enough to eat).You might try shortening her wake time; she might just be over stimulated and not able to calm herself down enough to get to a deep sleep....hope that helps, good luck!

Congrats on your baby. I say trust your instincts. My daughter was a horrible sleeper..Never slept. At 10 months we even consulted a sleep consultant. And even now she just doesn't require a lot of sleep. My son was a little bit the same way but a lot better now. Like you said, she's a happy baby! And that makes for a happy mommy :) I do have to put out there that I think you should take other people's suggestions on baby books, BabyWise has been greatly opposed by the American Academy of Pediatrics. Thought you might find this article interesting. http://www.suite101.com/article.cfm/pregnancy_childbirth/...
I hope that is the right one, sometimes I paste the wrong ones :) ha ha . You sound like you have a beautiful little one.

If you are fairly content with the situation don't worry what babywise or anyone else says! I have a little boy (my first) who did the exact same thing. It is hard to get much done (or catch a nap) in that amount of time but not every child will go by the book, if she is happy and healthy there is probably nothing wrong with it. My son is now 9 months old and takes a 2 hour nap and a 1 1/2 hour nap each day, he made that change on his own without any training on my part.

Every child is different. My son was the same. Never napped much in the day but slept all night. I was happy that I could sleep at night. During the day I was awake anyway! As Long as she seems happy, I wouldn't worry. (My first child did not sleep in the day or very well at night...she was happy too!)Good Luck.

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