4 Year Old Mimicking Bad Behavior at School

this is a kid thing, not a YOUR kid thing.
honestly, blaming one's kid's ever-evolving behavior on 'mimicking' is a subtle cop-out. i say that gently. we all figure things out as we go. but think about it. 'my kid has always been just fine, but he changes when he's around other people! oh noes!'
your kid will always have other people influencing him. that's life. your job isn't to prevent him from being influenced by anyone else (a lot of those influences will be positive) but to make sure that a) you're the main influence and b) that you're working with him on weeding out and becoming discriminatory about the behaviors he chooses to mimic.
please note, i'm framing this response for an adult, not a 4 year old. he doesn't understand the very natural processes he's experiencing. he's only 4. this isn't a one-and-done fix. you don't just tweak something and presto! your 'sweet well behaved boy is back.'
he's still there. he's learning and growing, and that means constant, ongoing change. some of the changes aren't for the better, so you gently and patiently redirect them.
you don't just slap an 'other kids are causing this' label on it and think you can 'fix' it.
this is parenting. it lasts for a couple of decades.
khairete
S.

Your child is always going to be exposed to other children, as are everyone else's children. It is pointless to essentially blame your child's behavior on another child.

Your child will always test you, that's what children do. It's your job as a parent to learn the appropriate responses. Notice that your son also mimics the GOOD behavior?

Usually what parents do when their children cry and hang on when they drop them off at preschool, is they give them a quick hug and kiss, and then leave.

This is a very minor problem, in the scheme of things. If you are finding this situation so very difficult, I suggest you buy some parenting books. There are a lot of good ones out there. Maybe the moms here can suggest some for you.

You are going to have many more difficult issues than this before you are done parenting your son -- the first thing you need to do is avoid blaming other children for your son's behavior.

It's not "bad" behavior. It is totally age-age-approriate. Your son is experimenting with cause and effect. See it from his point of view. His friend is scared of being in school, maybe his friend has a point. React with love, with calm separation behaviors and with the reassurance that you will always show up for him. It is the teacher's responsibility to help him transition into school as you leave. This should be well within her ability. Take heart, this too shall pass.

Welcome to 4.5-5.5. They have this painful, death scream characterizing the age. I can pinpoint a 4/5-5.5 year old from 50 yards away. Welcome to the wild age of 5. He is going to start screaming more often, but at the same time, you will get lots of "i love you mommy." You may also get, "i hate you mommy."

He's playing around with behavior. It's the age. most parents of 5 year olds wonder where there sweet well behaved boys went. Perfectly normal developmentally and not caused by anyone other than nature.

Praise him heartily for everything he does that is good. Ignore the bad behavior. It'll right itself soon enough

Oh dear.
They certainly can learn all kinds of things from peers - some of it not so good.
When our son was that age we had to tell him to pay attention to the teacher and not what anyone else was doing.
It took awhile but his sweet nature reasserted itself again.
I know you've talked about it but you're going to have to keep talking about it till it gets better.
Ask him how he feels when he sees his friend crying so much.
Does it make him feel mad his friend is acting like that or angry that his friend gets attention for it?
Wouldn't he rather play instead of going through all that fuss?
Maybe instead of mimicking his friend, he can play with someone else until his friend feels better.
His friend has to work out how to make a transition from being with his Mom to playing at school with his friends - and he'll learn how to do it sooner or later.
You tell your son that he already KNOWS how to do this, and it makes you proud when he settles right into his school day.
Any time he has a melt down in the morning, tell him (when he's calm) "We didn't have such a good morning today and the only thing I can think of is maybe you didn't get enough sleep last night. So any day you cry in the morning over nothing, then we'll go to bed earlier that night.".
He WILL CALL you on it several times to see if you mean it.
Follow through with it every time it happens - and see if a little extra rest helps.
Growth spurts can happen - which can make them extra tired and cranky - so make sure he gets more sleep when he needs it.