4 Year Old Hitting Self

Updated on December 18, 2009
A.M. asks from Proctorville, OH
6 answers

My four year old has started hitting himself in the head when he gets mad. It started about 6 months ago. He uses his fist and hits himself in the forehead. I can't figure it out. I've tried to get him to scream into a pillow or do something else to get his frustration out, but he continues hitting himself. Anyone else have experience with this and is there anything I can do to get him to stop.

What can I do next?

  • Add your own comment
  • Ask your own question
  • Join the Mamapedia community
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

More Answers



answers from Greensboro on

Hi A.,

Hitting himself is an extreme behavior. We are all, by nature, self preservers so hitting oneself is usually caused by some sort of outside interference. My questions would be:

When was his last vaccine?

Is your home detoxed? Most toxins take a few years to build up in a system so this age is when toxicity commonly shows itself in behavioral problems, respiratory problems, digestive issues, and the onset of "allergies."

Your husband's work raises a red flag for me as metal factories are full of issues. Your husband can be bringing things home on his clothes.

What is his food intake like? Is he taking an absorbable multivitamin to help his own system fight off all the things that we expose ourselves to?

These are just things to think about....





answers from Jacksonville on

I believe John Rosemond touched on this in his book Making the Terrible Twos Terrific. It didn't apply to my kids, so I don't remember quite what he said. The book is useful for age 4 as well, and is excellent.



answers from Nashville on

why is a 4 year old needing to have an out on frustration or anger? What is going on in his life that he even feels this? Most habits are learned habits, or they have seen it elsewhere. Talk to him and see what is causing this frustration. He is 4.. he should be able to express his feelings. Good Luck, Merry Christmas and God Bless.



answers from Charleston on

I am sooo not looking forward to this age! My son will be 3 in a few days "think he's bad at 2? Just wait till he hits 3" everyone would say-they were right! I wish I had more experience on this, but all I can say is that I've read about this and it's not abnormal. Kids do have fustrations, whether or not it's being told "no", or not being big enough to ride a bike, if you've had a kid that's ever had a tantrum around this age (and I defy anyone to show me one that hasn't), maybe just try reading up on this or what not. I know when my son throws tantrums, I say"Oh, so you're gonna throw yourself on the ground and freak out? I'm gonna walk away now" I don't know how close 3 and 4 are, but they say"any attention is good attention" to kids that are young, and I know that not giving mine the response he wants (or God forbid-mommy's just going to step over ME and WALK AWAY!)it's really nipped it in the bud. But,most likely, it's one of those weird little phases that some kids go through, and I just wanted to say that absolutely nothing about this strikes me as abnormal in the least, or, seems even slightly indicative of there being some kind of big problem, or 'something;s going on at home"-ish. Your little guy, like all little kids, is learning about coping-with life, frustrations, etc. and what works and what doesn't. Any kid that never experiences any kind of frustration is going to find themself very ill-suited for life!


answers from Louisville on

talk to his doctor i have seen children who do this and they had a great deal of help with therapy. ask for a referral


answers from Raleigh on

I found this http://www.parentdish.com/2006/04/11/weird-toddler-behavi... - I thought it might help a little to know that you are not alone.

I also found this http://counsellingresource.com/ask-the-psychologist/2007/... - which suggests that it could possibly be due to ADHD.

Here's another stream on the same sort of thing - http://www.mamapedia.com/article/child-hitting-herself - the answers on this one might help.

My suggestion is EMF (Emotional Freedom Technique)- a tapping technique on acupressure points. http://www.emofree.com/ - has a Get Started Free section. If you search for children on that site you will find some good articles. www.tapping.com has a free tapping points summary if you sign up for their newsletter. Good luck!

Next question: My 2 Year Old Son I Feel Is Out of Control

Explore Mamapedia