4 Year Old Hates Underwear!

Updated on October 09, 2011
L.P. asks from Phoenixville, PA
10 answers

Hello,
I'm hoping some of you moms that may have gone through this, can give me some advice. For a few months now my 4 year old daughter fights with me EVERY morning about her underwear. She cries and says its going up her butt, that it bothers her, etc. Trust me when I say the underwear is not the problem, due to this issue I've bought her several different kinds in several sizes. Once I do manage to talk her into wearing a certain pair, after a few minutes, she is totally fine. But somedays she throws a fit! I'm kind of on the fence about whether or not she should wear it - I feel so beaten down by the constant conflict that part of me thinks I should just let her go without and just make sure she wears pants or tights. My husband, however, is adamant that we stick to our guns and say underwear is a MUST. For those of you who have gone through this. How did you handle it and how did it finally get resolved? Thank you. PS Its just the underwear that she complains about, no other clothing.

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S.H.

answers from St. Louis on

I've seen quite a few little girls wearing boy underwear lately.....& it honestly helps them with avoiding all of those ride-up problems. Makes sense!

2 moms found this helpful

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D.G.

answers from Philadelphia on

Try Hanna Anderson - it's a catalogue. My daughter would only wear these and they are way softer and more comfortable. All the elastic is covered and they are cut so they never ride up.

1 mom found this helpful

C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

If she wants to go "commando" let her...I don't have a problem with kids going commando.

If the rule in your home is underwear is a must - then let her choose her underwear so that she has some control over it and what she likes. It may take several tries to find the one that works for her - kinda like thongs for women - you can't just go into the store and buy a pair - you have to try several and wear them...

So give her control and let her choose her underwear. If she feels like it's crawling up her butt, then buy it a size bigger.

GOOD LUCK!

1 mom found this helpful
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M.F.

answers from Youngstown on

My friends little boy hates wearing underwear. Always has. He is 9. He wears it to school though(just in case) and when he wears a bathing suit(doesn't like the feel of the net underwear). She lets him not wear it anyother time though. I know he is a boy and not a girl but it may be a phase. If you feel she must have on underclothes then maybe tiny boy shorts or something. I would just let her go without to save yourself a headache and a fight. Pick your battles.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.J.

answers from Allentown on

Well it sounds like you have tried numerous underwear for her. Have you tried latex free though? Sometimes they are just uncomfortable and once on, it isn't so bad, but the thought of them, well you know. Maybe that is her problem. Or you could try the boys underwear, like others suggested. My 6 year old is supposed to always wear it, but I don't check anymore and sometimes she doesn't, and I don't even know it, so how would anyone else know? I wouldn't worry too much about it. I remind her that is better to wear it, and she just shrugs her shoulders. She never liked wearing underwear either. My son on the other hand can't stand going without undies on. And he prefers the boxers to the briefs but he doesn't care too much as long as a pair in on him. Kids are all different. If you can't find one that she likes, let it go. It isn't the end of the world as long as she has pants on. Now I wouldn't let her wear shorts that it can be seen if you don't have undies on(we either get the shorts with a skirt or the biker type so it isn't an issue even in summer). But now she won't be wearing shorts anyway with the cooler weather and maybe by next summer it will not be an issue.

1 mom found this helpful
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☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

How about pants or tights and no undies at home, undies when you go out---for now?

1 mom found this helpful

M.J.

answers from Milwaukee on

I would try some major different underwear. Like boys boxer briefs. My 4 year old DD is really fussy about underwear too. We don't have to go to boys, but she only likes a few that we have. I think her faves are H&M undies.

If it continues with your DD then start thinking about sensory issues. However, right now it may just be control issues.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

When my son first started potty training, he didn't want to wear underwear. We just had briefs for him. So we bought boxer briefs and started calling them "shorts." Once we stopped calling them underwear, we had no problem with him.

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C.T.

answers from Dallas on

I went through it with my son and I let him go without for a while. After a few weeks, I insisted he wear it if he wanted to go to the park with friends. If he chose not to, then no big deal and no anger, we just didn't go. He chose to wear it. At home, I let him go without for as long as he wanted. This resistance only lasted a month or so and then he moved on to something else. Pick your battles and let your child have her way sometimes. It's better for everyone. Maybe you should loan your hubby a pair of uncomfortable panties for a day and see if that changes his mind!!:)

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

With boxers.

My son has the same mild latex allergy that I do... AND the same sensory issues that I do.

I don't wear panties unless it's for sex. WHY? Because the stupid elastic BURNS. Not at first, at first it's just uncomfortable as all get out. And then my skin starts to degrade, stink (yeast infection in the degraded skin), blister, slough, itch, burn (even without the yeast infection on the skin surface). I fought for YEARS with my mum about underwear (after all, everyone gets those little red lines). But mine were from an allergy.

Try spankies or boxers.

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