4 Month Old Not Sleeping Through the Night

I don't have advice, but the same thing had been happening to me. I have a 5 month old daughter, who was sleeping really good most nights all thru the night. Now, all the sudden she's waking up again, sometimes 2-3 times. And she's wide awake. I can't just put her binky in and let her fall back asleep. She is kicking and excited when she sees me come in the room, like it's time to play. She is on rice cereal and I just started her on green beans and squash. So, I was wondering if it had anything to do with that. But it doesnt seem to bother her during the day.. Some people have suggested that it could be teething... or congestion.. cause she is getting over a cold. But, she slept really well all thru her cold. So, I have no idea what to think.. Just letting you know your not alone. I hope someone has some advice ;)

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It looks like you've had excellent advice already.

I would like to warn you STRONGLY against Ezzo's book Babywise. Ezzo was a religious fanatic with no medical background who was excommunicated from his church for his extreme bliefs. The American Academy of Pediatrics specifically named Babywise in their warning against babyscheduling and forcing babies to sleep through the night as techniques that increase your baby's risk of dehydration and low birth weight. You can see more about this at http://www.ezzo.info

Instead I recommend the book Sweet Dreams: A Pediatrician's Secrets For Your Child's Good Night's Sleep, by Dr Paul Fleiss. It explains the many reasons why a child's sleep might be interrupted and gives a realistic explanation of how infants sleep and why sleeping more than 4-6 hours straight is not usual or necessarily healthy for an infant. It also gives several chapters on how to improve the natural sleep cycle for all ages, including daily sunlight, nutrition, limited television, and a clean sleep environment.

Good luck, mama!

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My dr told me that for some babies everytime they hit a new milestone they tend to interrupt their own sleep pattern. So if she is starting to roll over or trying too it is the first thing that they think of instead of going back to sleep and then they become very upset and of course cry for you. She did say to help her figure out how to go back to sleep on her own. The advice I was given is wait and if she is too upset go in and reassure her you are there but do not pick her up some of my babies just needed a little soothing voice and an occasional rub or pat. I did have 2 that had to cry it out. It is very hard for a mommy to do but it will bring many well rested nights to you once the pattern is broken.

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My daughter did this too. The doctor said that once they reach a certain age where they become a little more active, they need more calories to sustain them, and will tend to wake up more. When you first introduce cereal, it is usually not enough to compensate--give it a few weeks, and you may see a difference as she eats more cereal. Regarding crying it out, some advice given to me was to look for patterns in how they wake up--is it at the same time every night (within 10 minutes of the same time)? If so, then it is probably just out of habit, and you may need to look for other ways to get her back to sleep than eating. If not, it may be a real need for food. Another idea may be that she is getting a little too much sleep during the day, and may need to drop a nap time so she is more tired at night? I don't know--just throwing out a bunch of ideas. I hope you find a solution soon--I know it can be exhausting!!!

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Let me give you some advice from the other side of the fence. I am a strong believer in responding to your babies every cry until they are at least 6-8 months. Although there are many books out there that tell you how to teach your baby to sleep through the night at an early age, I don't believe this is what they are physilogically ment to do. They are built to wake in the night to eat, it is scientifically proven by the way our milk is made up. And by making them "learn" to sleep through the night, you are encouraging a deeper sleep pattern that is not normal for babies, and may be one of the causes of sids, according to some researchers. Also, by waking and eatting at night, your baby is telling you that she needs more to eat, preparing for a growth spert. If you are nursing, this is her signal to your body to make more milk. If you are not nursing, that natural response for your baby is the same. Chances are it will only last a few weeks and then her sleep patters will change again. One thing is for sure with kids, as soon as you think you know what they are going to do, they change their minds. You need to be flexible and adjust as they change and grow. And by responding to their cries and needs at an early age, you are laying a foundation of trust that will last a life time. It is worth the work. You will get to sleep again, I promise.

S. Mom of five

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A. --
We had exactly this same thing happen with my son. And apparently it's pretty common: http://www.kellymom.com/parenting/sleep/4mo-sleep.html
We didn't start rice cereal til after 5 months, and it didn't make a difference, either. We choose not to let him cry it out until closer to 7 months, but that's a personal choice. You have to do what's right for YOUR family, your sanity, lol.
My son finally started sleeping through the night again closer to 8 months (and while it was bad for a while, we survived it).
Good luck! Those first 6 months are so tough.
A.

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I would suggest getting the video or book, The Happiest Baby on the Block, by Dr. Harvey Karp. He has the 5 S's... Swaddle(the video shows you how to do this if you don't know how), Side(Put the baby on its side), Swing/Shake(more of a bounce...NEVER SHAKE A BABY!), Sush(Sushing loudly in their ear), and Sucking(like a pacifier). I found this technique a few years ago and have used it with my 2 younger daughters. Works great! I also use some of the ideas from 'Babywise'. Such as a feeding schedule(every 3-4 hours during the day, then steping it up to every 2 hours in the evening starting at about 4pm). Also use a bedtime routine with some cuddle time, baby massage, darkened room, lullaby singing. Once you little one is bigger you could try feeding them some mashed avacado and olive oil before bedtime. Keeps their tummy nice a full. Good luck!...It will all work out eventually!

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My daughter did this, too, at 5-months. She didn't sleep through the night again until she was 10-months old. Like others have said, it could be a growth spurt and she's hungry or that she's reaching a new milestone that she's just excited to practice, even if that means missing sleep in the middle of the night! If she seems hungry, I would just go ahead and feed her for a couple of weeks and see if she stops on her own. If not, there are many different techniques for teaching your child to sleep through the night (again). With our son, we did the "cry it out" and that only took 3 days. Our daughter would cry for hours, so that wasn't going to work with her, so I just started giving her a bottle with water in it and she decided that it just wasn't worth waking up for anymore. It might take a few weeks, but you will find what works for your daughter.

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In my humble opinion, it is never too early to let them cry it out. Ok, maybe before 6 weeks old. But both my kids learned to cry it out at 8 weeks and were both sleeping through the night by 10 weeks old. I also use binkies to calm them, pat them and shhhhh them, but not pick them up. And if you wait longer and longer to respond, they'll start to learn that you're not coming to play in the middle of the night. Just be sure there's not something wrong--cold, hot, ear ache, hungry, poopy, ambient noise....you can assess a lot of those w/o picking them up. If it's none of those, then slowly letting them learn to self-soothe (by not picking them up when they cry) should get them back on track. Good luck! those early months are hard!

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You can try letting her cry herself to sleep and see how she does. Listen to the cry to determine how she feels. If she sounds scared you should go to her. If she just wants to play then you can let her cry for a while.

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My daughter went throuh spurts like that where she would sleep through the night for a few months then stop for a few weeks then start again for a few months. They say it is when they are on the verge of smoothing new, like teething, crawling, new foods, things like that. At 4 months that is when I started going in to check on her and give her a pacifer then after that double the time that I go in there . Like first wait 5 mines then 10 mintens then 20 minutes and so on. They say that way they do not feel abanondoned. Truthfully who knows is all trial and error. She will sleep advantually. Good luck!

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1 month old?? Wow. That's actually a little early to be sleeping all the way through the night. Although I guess it depends on your definition. Some people consider 6 hours "through the night" and to others it's more like 8 or even 12. Anyway. She's probably going through a growth spurt (hence the need for an extra feeding) and teething could explain the waking up without eating. In my opinion, it's not too early to let her cry a little. But if it's excessive and solid for more than 10-15 minutes or so, you should probably go to her (not pick her up) and let her know you're there, but it's time to go to sleep. Also, if she's sleeping a lot during the day, maybe try to cut back on her naps to help her stay asleep at night. I've done the sleep through the night training 4 times so far, and it's been different for each child. Just find what she responds best to. Good luck!

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Hi A.... I just read some people's advice. Poor thing, you are probably more confused now than before. First of all, letting your baby cry it out IS NOT CRUEL like somebody said. However, your baby may still be a bit young for that. My son did this same thing. First of all, I made sure he wasn't too hot or cold... or anything obvious (like my other son jumping in the crib with him :)! Then, I would go in there and rub on his back for a bit. Sometimes it worked. Other times I had to nurse him. However, I only gave him about 2 ounces because I didn't want to establish a habit of midnight feedings. That's torture.

Just remember babies NEED routines. If you keep your baby on a good daytime (feeding every three hours or so) and nighttime routine, hopefully this waking up in the middle of the night will pass. Ever read Baby Wise? I did with my second son, and it was a LIFE SAVER. It was the difference between sleeping through the night at 2 months and 18 months (my oldest). Good luck and God Bless!

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It sounds like she is teething. My 6 month old just started sleeping longer at night and then started waking up more again. I was going in and putting a little ora-gel on her bottom gums. She usually would fall back to sleep on my shoulder within minutes and stay asleep when I put her in the crib.

It sounds like she's going through a good old fashioned growth spurt. My sone did this same thing at about 4 months and it took probably 3-4 weeks for him to "grow out of it". In terms of letting her cry it out, I don't think she's too young. I was always told that as long as a baby weighs approx. 12-13 lbs, they have enough weight on them and eat enough during the day to make it through the night. So as long as she meets that weight limit, I'd let her work it out after 1 overnight feeding (until the growth spurt is over).

My Third child was doing like yours and sleeping through the night at 6 weeks, and then started waking up alot when he got a few months older. After going to a regular check up I found out that he had ear infections. Apparently it causes them alot of pain, especially when they are sleeping. Because of these ear infections he was a terrible sleeper until he was about nine months, when we got tubes in his ears. You may want to rule out the possibility of ear infections.

I am a mother of 5. My advice is that it is never too early to let your child cry themselves to sleep! It isn't easy, don;t get me wrong I have a very hard time doing it, but you must remind yourslef that it will pay off in the end. I recently read the book BABY WISE I highly recommend it, I needed to recommit myself to why it is so important to be tough the first couple of months when they are babies so they establish good sleep habits and this book did it for me. One of my five children I constantly gave in to when she would cry in the middle of the night and she didn't sleep through the night til she was 15 months old!! Now she is 2 and still can't go a week without having a night where she wakes up.

It's ok to let them cry. Maybe give her 5 minutes, go in and soothe or give her a pacifier - don't pick her up if this isn't a normal feeding time. Then stretch it out to 10 minutes, then 15... Make sure she is fed, dry, not too hot, not too cold, nothing hurting.... Having her find a way to soothe herself is priceless!

I am having the same problem with my 3 1/2 month old. I think it's just because they are getting out of the phase of heavy sleeping newborns. They wake up more easily and I think they don't know how to fall back asleep yet. I have been trying to just pat my son on his back or side while he is trying to get back to sleep. I don't want to just let him cry but I also don't want him to think I have to put him back to sleep. I hope things get better...being up several times in the night makes for a lousy day, huh?

Hello A.,
Congrats on your sweet baby. I have 2 girls 7 and 4 and my 4 year old STILL occasionally wakes up in the middle of the night and cries out for us to come get her and bring her in our bed.
Here is my experience and advice on night waking: Your baby is probably hungry, or just wants to be cuddled. I would recommend nursing her in your bed so you don't have to fully wake up (I don;t know if you are nursing, sorry) or soothing her in whatever way you can, singing, rubbing her back, ect. Don;t turn lights on or get up for too long, keep it sleepy and obviously bedtime. and please NEVER let your baby cry itself to sleep! I have witnessed babies who were left to cry themselves to sleep grow up to be very insecure and afraid. and the ones whos cries were answered are way more secure and fearless. Imagine if you were completely helpless, like a baby, and you were crying at night and no one came, and you knew someone was there. After a while you begin to think no one cares, or your needs aren't important enough to answer, so you loose hope. This is a little extreme to hear if it is your first exposure to it, I know, but there are many articles about it. In fact a great author of many articles is Vimala Schneider (specifically an article "Crying" in Mothering Magazine Spring 1987), also an infant massage teacher. Check out Mothering Magazine, you may find it interesting. Good Luck and enjoy your small baby, she will soon be 4 years old!!

Our Dr. recommended Ferber's book, which says it is fine to cry it out at that age. (That is what we did with our first daughter.) There is another book called Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child by Weissbluth, that says 4 months is the age to beginning establishing a firm sleep schedule, with or without crying it out. We found with our second child when we put her to bed earlier she slept better through the night. We would put her to bed by 6:30, sometimes even earlier. We got this idea from Weissbluth's book. I thought it was an awesome book and wish I would have read it with my first. My oldest is 6yrs and the baby is 22 months. I found with the baby, if I would go to her one night at say 10pm because she was crying, she would wake again around 12 and then she would do the same thing the next night, by the 3rd night I would decide to ignore her and that would be the end of her crying for the next few weeks. (She usually only cried about 15 min or so. three minutes of crying feels like an eternity.) Occasionally, she will still wake crying and when I do go to her it just wakes her more and she gets more irritated. When I let her cry she cries for about 3 minutes and is back asleep. Of course all children are different. My husband told me I should tell you that in Weissbluth's book, he mentions that if the baby is eye rubbing they are already over tired. You should put them down before that point. We found that interesting because with our first we always used the eye rubbing to determine it was time for her to sleep and she tended to have a hard time falling asleep.

My guess is she is teething. This always disrupts my kids sleeping pattern. Other possibilities are she is getting sick, or just growing. Babies always seem to change their schedule, just as you are getting comfortable!

She is probably going through a growth spurt. Just as you think there is rhyme and reason and you have a schedule, it will change for whatever reason. Also sometimes this just happens, they just decide I have been sleeping through the night, so now I won't.

Good luck.

Babies bodies, minds, intellect, & emotions go through incredible changes, especially in the first years. She may be experiencing a physical growth spurt, or just need some extra reassurance/feeling of security. Hunger or discomfort from physical growth or teething would all be good guesses as well. She is in the "Trust versus Mistrust" stage of her psychosocial development (see Erikson's theory of development), so it is imperative that she learns that she can depend on you not only for her physical needs, but for security & comfort as well.

When my daughter was about 4 months old I read "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth, M.D. My husband I have followed his suggestions about having consistant nap and bedtimes and she has been sleeping through the night ever since (7p-7a). I will admit that the book is a bit lengthy and the author is a little repetitive, but his program has worked for us. Good luck.

I have a 4 mo. old daughter too, she's starting that also. She might just be going through a growth spurt, that happened with my other two kids as well. Hang in there it will pass.

Brittany G.

When my second child was a baby, he did the same thing. The nurse told me to rub the mattress where I was going to lay him down so that it would feel warm and to put a shirt of mine in the crib with him. A safer option might be to hold a blanket of hers over you while you are feeding her, this will then pick up your scent, then when you lay her down, the bed feels warm, and the blanket smells like you. Hope this helps, good luck!

Your baby is going through a growth spurt. It's completely normal to start waking through the night.

Forcing a baby to cry it out is cruel. How would you like to be shut away in a room screaming for help and no one coming to help you? Crying it out is for lazy parents who are to selfish to meet the needs of their infants.

Hi A.,

Sleep is such a precious commodity and when we don't have it it's not fun. It is definitely to early to let your baby sleep through the night but that shouldn't stop you from trying some comfort measures before picking her up. She's up for a reason. Your 4 month old may be starting to teethe even if the teeth don't erupt for a month or so. Think about how your gums hurt when the gums were irritated. Same thing for baby, the teeth are starting to shift and that can be irritating. What else could be going on?
As you already noticed, giving cereal doesn't help babies sleep through the night. Since it really isn't needed before 6 months skip that process. Are you breastfeeding or bottle feeding?
My advice is to comfort your baby, give her the security that her needs will be met, even though you'd rather be sleeping. This time does pass and you will look back and realize that while it wasn't a picnic, you survived.

Your baby is now old enough to start introducing rice cereal into her diet. You will want to talk to your pediatrician before you begin, but that extra little bit in her tummy will help her get through the night. My son who is now almost 6 months went through the same thing. Now that he is eating baby food and cereal he goes to bed full and sleeps all night.

My second (daughter) was not a sleeper at all i had asked the doctor about giving her a little benedryl to help her sleep. He said that would be fine however i was probably an unfortunate mother that had a child that didn't require alot of sleep. She also would never take naps during the day. However make sure if you have started her on rice a bed time you aren't trying to much thinking it will last longer. Sometimes if you are feeding to much rice it has an adverse effect and they wake up hunger more often. Or it simply could be a growing spurt and she needs to eat.

Yes, babies wake for a reason but sometimes that reason is pure habit that needs to be broken. Other times it could be a growth spurt making your little one hungry in the night. If that is the case it should right itself soon. Try putting baby on a 3 hour routine during the day -feed/keep awake 1.5 hrs/sleep 1.5 hrs - and repeat the pattern all day long even if it means waking her to eat. Then at night, don't wake her to eat...this was a lifesaver for us and countless numbers of my friends and family! You should see a difference in just a few days as she begins to stabilize her hunger.

~L.

How lucky you are that she sleeps so well! Mine were always up all hours of the night. NOW -- at 5 yrs old, my boy finally sleeps pretty soundly. I just kept being patient. I figured they're only little for a SHORT time. When they get up, I lead them back to their beds, rub their little backs and feet and kiss them goodnight AGAIN :-) I never let them cry themselves to sleep, I just couldn't. Believe me - there were times w/ my two where I was so completely exhausted - I HAD to leave them in their cribs a bit. Especially my colicky daughter! I've even let them sleep w/ me just so I can get some sleep. Obviously it didn't do any harm because they are fine going to sleep now. Some families have "family" beds even. I'd say just comfort her - let her know your're not far away - this too shall pass.

Neither of my boys slept through the night until they were almost 2. Good luck.
K.

My daughter also slept through the nights at a very young age. When she started to wake up, I began to give her cereal and other solid foods. She still woke up. I think she was going through a growth spurt, among other changes. It didn't last long, but she did continue to wake up at 5am, want a bottle, and went back to bed until 7. She's a year old now and does it still to this day.

I, personally, think 4mo. is too young to let them cry it out. I wouldn't do that with my daughter. I layed on the couch with her or brought her to bed and she would go back to sleep. Most of the time, a small bottle would do it.

Before you know it, she'll be sleeping soundly through the night again. It was nice when it lasted, right?! haha
Can definitely be frustrating at times.

Take care!
J.

In my opinion, it's not too early to let her cry herself back to sleep. The earlier they learn to put themselves back to sleep, the better. However, have you considered the idea that maybe it's time to start a bit of rice cereal. If a child is between 4 and 6 months and has already been sleeping through the night, that is something I would consider. Maybe she just needs a few more calories during the day.

she could be sick. the same thing happened with my little one she actually had an ear infection and problems with her formula that gave her painful gas. your baby is crying for a reason. she really is too young to be crying to manipululate you in some waymake sure you get her health checked out before you choose to just let her cry. a four month old may still need to eat during the night, or she may need you to help put her back to sleep. you initiall sleeping through the night may have just been a luck fluke too, but do make sure she is notsick or in pain first. then you can do what you think best as her mom. che ck out the no cry sleep solution book too. it has great advice

She is only 120 days old. the fact that she slept through the night at all is a blessing, babies patterns of sleep change, and keep changing until they are teens. I do not believe in crying it out under any circunstance a baby wakes up for a reason, and if they are in a growth spurt they wake up even more then normal, It could be they are hungry or they just want to mom. I do believe it is ok to wait a few minutes and see if they will calm themselves but if not it is our jobs to be there for them no matter what time of day it is.

Letting babies cry it out is NOT good for them. Babies go through many changes in their first year, and I never expect a baby to "sleep through the night" in the first year. Your little one may just need mommy. After all, she was in your body for almost 10 months! Give her at least another 10 months to get used to life outside your body. You cannot spoil a baby by holding, rocking, nursing as much as she needs. My babies have always co-slept with me and my husband, and we have never had any sleep problems. I recommend "The Baby Book" by Dr. Sears. Blessings to you and your precious baby!

its not too early. If you daughter has already been able to sleep 6-8 hours without needing to eat, you can let her cry. As hard as it is to do (I know! I did it!) its actually good for her. She will learn how to fall asleep on her own and she'll be better rested becuase she isn't spending as much time trying to go back to sleep at night. Solid food really has no bearing on sleeping through the night... sleeping & waking is a brain thing, not a stomach thing (though she could have a natural awaking and realize she's hungry). I personally let my daughter cry is she hasn't yet slept 6 hours at night (she usually goes at least 8). If its been at least 6 hours, I get up and feed her. Good luck!