13 answers

32 Month Old (2 Years 8 Months) Holding Bowel Movements

My son holds his bowel movements for days! It's horrible because he gets horribly cranky and ruins entire days just tyring to hold it. He's not constipated because the BM is soft. I believe that he was so traumatized by being constipated a few times a while ago that he's afraid to go.

I'm trying to ensure that he doesn't get constipated and hopefully his fear will subside.

Any advice would be much appreciated.

What can I do next?

So What Happened?™

This past Monday evening we decided to put him on Miralax. It's now Friday and as I started to write this, he finally went....WITHOUT any pain!!!! This was day 7 and I've been horribly worried about him. A few of you wrote indicating that your child's colon had stretched as a result of this same behavior. Every day this week that he held it, I just worried more and more. We have a dr. appt. on Oct. 6 th and hopefully by then I can tell the story to the dr. but, we won't have to have any add'l treatment.

I'm so relieved to say that, I think this will be the end of the painful BM's and holding it. I'm sure that it might take a while to end his fear of pooping but, were on our way!! Thanks to all of you who wrote to me with your stories. I'm so thankful to our source, Mamasource!

More Answers

This is the age in which this happens. It's common.
It happened to my girl at this age too, and we had to take her to a Pediatric Gastroenterologist, because she became greatly constipated and her BM's were impacted, inside.

Main thing is, he does not get constipated. It can trigger a vicious cycle if they do... because, per our Doctor, it causes 1) pain 2) then they don't want to poop 3) then they get more constipated 4) then they get more pain, and on and on.

This "stage" is partly emotional/psychological and physical.
The more they hold it in.... the more it can 'hurt' them....then the more they don't want to go poop.

ALSO, holding in BM can also cause problems internally. So keep that in mind.
Here are some links on it:
http://en.allexperts.com/q/Pediatrics-1429/Struggles-hold...
http://www.drgreene.com/21_762.html
http://www.medhelp.org/posts/show/278442

I would take him to the Doctor.
Take care,
Susan

2 moms found this helpful

I know how you feel. My daughter started holding her bowel around 2 years old until 5 years old!! She held it for 18 days straight.

She is on Miralax daily. We were actually off of it for a while but had an xray a month ago and her colon was once again full, even though she is pooping nearly daily.

Please don't listen to well meaning people who tell you it is behaivoral. Unless a Dr. tells you that, ignore it. Don't punish and reward probably won't work. Once they've held it, the can't push it out. Their colon's get stretched out then the poop becomes impacted. One would thing if your full it would coming squirting out (tmi, I know) but the truth is, the more backed up he is, the harder it will be to push out.

You need to get him on something to keep his poop soft and help him to have daily bowel movements. A wholesome diet with plenty of water is a great start, but at this point, he may need more. Once you find something that works and gives you the daily soft poops, you HAVE to stick with it for awhile, it can take up to 6mos for the colon to go back to it's normal size. For my daughter, we are going on nearly a year. She is doing great but we aren't 100% yet.

Google Encopresis and see if that sounds like your son or sounds like you are heading that way. If so, talk to his Dr. about it. If all he says is he is constipated, then find a Dr. that will listen. For us, this went on for way too long! My Dr. should have been more wise. This is VERY common.

Call me or email me if you have any further questions.
M.
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2 moms found this helpful

Hi R., i wish had some wonderful advice to give. Mt daughter did that as well when she was young, so i can give you compassion! My daughter sis that for about 2 maybe 3 years. There was no reason that i could ever find out, belive me i tried my hardest! She would tense up her body and hold it in for dear life! Anytime she held in in for to long, over a week, when she would run or be active, it would try to come out and she would stop everything she was doing and hide and hold it in. I tried everyform of a laxative. i had her sit on the toilet for an hour. I went to the pediatrictian numerous times trying to find out why. She even had an enema so they could look with a camera and see if she was ok. She is 9 years old today, and i have asked her if she remembers, cause i still want to know why??!! But she doesn't remeber a thing and goes #2 just fine.
She stopped the summer befor kindergarten.it was a miracle. I finally prayed and asked the Lord for help, and she stopped. I was the most wonderful thing!! Know i am praying for you!

1 mom found this helpful

Hi R.,
I understand your concerns. My son is 3 1/2 yo and he was diagnosed with "Fecal Hoarding". I've been struggling with irregular BM and constipation for 2yrs. I've been trying to potty train and having lots of difficulty. We finally changed pediatricians and did an "intestinal clean-out" and we use Miralax daily. We are trying to retrain the colon to just release when the sensation comes. You also have to be careful of "Mega Colon". The colon enlarges due to holding stool. We've been trying to educate our son to not hold his poop because it makes boo-boo's in his tummy. We also read the book, "Everybody Poops". We also realized he has alot of control in his BM. It's taken alot of patience, rewards and stickers, but we have made progress. I think you should talk to your Dr. before it gets worse. It can be a real problem.
Good Luck!
A.

1 mom found this helpful

Poor baby, my daughter did the same thing, my husband and I would literally have to sit with her on the toilet and hold her down in a seated position so she can cry and at the same time push it out... it was just a fear of being constipated a few times back... it's a horrible thing to go through but the good thing is that it gets better. I started giving her a lot of foods to help it along and started putting her on the toilet and sitting with her for at least 15 minutes every day just to bring the urge... just be patiend, this situation ruined our vacations, night outs etc.. If we planned to to go dinner, we would start trying to make her use the bathroom 2 days in advance it was so bad... it'll get better, she's now 14 :)

1 mom found this helpful

Hi
My son did the same thing, it was something he did even wearing diapers.
But, it got worse when potty training set in. For a loooong time we used diapers for #2 only.
Do not punish him, just try to look for signals when it's time and try to guide him towards going to the bathroom. If he is scared of the toilet (my son was), try getting him a potty. Our potty was always in the family room (I know - gross, but what to do) and one day he just finally realized that he could do it.
I have to say that we also needed to use Miralax mixed in with his drinks for quite some time I believe close to a year or so. We also pushed fruits (plums, oranges etc) that helps with the BMs.
It is tough, at one point I thought I was going to go nuts over this - it is really frustrating cause you know that your child is uncomfortable. It is really important to take care of it though, like the other lady wrote, do not let him go without a BM for too many days, if he wants a diaper - let him have one. If you need to stay home the whole day to get him to go - do that. (My son wanted to be home)
It gets better, nowadays he is 7 and half, and once in a while I have to remind him that he needs to take some time out of his busy day to go to the bathroom, and that ususally does it, but most of the time he goes by himself now.
If your childs ped. wont listen to this - ask for a referral to a specialist - this IS very common!

E.

1 mom found this helpful

Hi R.,
It is truly amazing how many kids have poop issues...My son started having them when he was a little constipated, and then he just started to hold it, just like your son. We use Miralax as well, it works wonders. From what I understand, it is all natural, although please ask your doctor first. Good luck to you!

1 mom found this helpful

Try turning him to face the back of the toilet- this was suggested for me and worked for my son- he quickly decided to change back on his own... it will subside :) It takes a bit of time for all the kinks of learning to go potty get ironed out. Hang in there!

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