3 Yr Old Daughters Behavior Out of Hand

So far I have had 2 kids go through the terrible 3's (it's not the 2's like they say it's the 3's). I remember having the "I am the boss" "No, I'm the boss" battle with both of them. 3's are hard as they are trying to assert their independence and they also don't know how to deal with all of their emotions. React to really bad behavior with a punishment and ignore attention seeking behavior.

Some things that help - 1. Try to get out of the house everyday, go to the park for an hour and let her run around. 2. Make sure she is going to bed early enough, my kids behavior was much worse when they were tired. 3. Be consistent, pick what you will follow through on and then do it. 4. Use a firm voice and look her in the eyes when telling her something is not ok. 5. And most importantly make sure you gets some, you time. Not just you time in the bathroom crying LOL.

It's going to get worse before it gets better.
You need to be consistent. Do time-out. It works when done correctly.
Make her sit the full 3 minutes. If she talks, the timer starts over. If she gets up, the timer starts over. You have to nip this behavior now or she'll be worse as she gets older.
If she runs to Grandma's, tell Grandma to send her right home.
LBC

Sounds like the terrible twos came late...you have to be consistant with her. She is old enough for time outs. One minute per year of the child. As far as running to your moms house, does she live next door? Otherwise how is she getting there? Your mom needs to send her home, just because she is upset she has no right to run out of the house, it just isnt safe. I would start her off with asking her to help prepare for her baby brother, let her know how she can be such a big help in doing XYZ and then praise her for helping. She can fold blankets, onsies, stack diapers in the bin, etc...

Good luck!

First of all remember that you are the boss she is not. Tell her that. I would make sure you and your husband are watching what you say cause that is where they pick it up. When she is bad let her have a fit and walk away from her. I would take her and put her in her room and tell her to get angry in there. Once she calms down,talk to her and tell her that she is going to be a big sister and she has to set a good example for her brother. Do not let her go to Grandma's when she is bad. Tell her no she is not going there because she is upset. I know it is hard cause you are pregnant. Put your foot down. Make a chart and every day that she is good put a star next to it. If there is something that she likes then she can get it at the end of the week and if she is bad she does not get a star for the day. Good luck

I always recommend Jim Fay's Love and Logic books. He has one specifically for toddlers. Start by giving her choices for everything. For example, would you like milk of juice with breakfast, would you like to play in your room or read a book with me, would you like to put on pajamas or brush your teeth first. Always give two choices that are ok with you and let her decide. Kids are fiercely independent and as parents we want to foster that trait, but in a controlled manner. Giving choices gives them some control and very often dispels power struggles time and again. It is actually fun to give choices but sometimes you will still have to discipline. Such as if she has something you don't want her to have. Say, would you like to hand XX to me or put it on the table? She still has a choice, but either option gets what you want which is giving up the item. If she doesn't choose one of the options within about a minute, then tell her you will decide for her. I have used Jim Fay's books as a teacher and now as a parent and I can tell you the strategies work wonderfully. It gives them some control and helps the adult keep their temper and sanity in check! You can also go to the website www.loveandlogic.com for more information. They also have workshops too which are phenomenal. Check to see if they have one available in your area. Hope this helps!
A.

If she spends most of her time at home with you then yes, she is probably bouncing off the walls. Get her out and about, take her to the park so she can run and play with other kids. You can sit in the shade and relax. Invite other children over so she has someone to play with.
You also need to be very calm, firm and consistent with her. If she hits or uses bad language, get right down on her level, take both of her hands in yours, look her in the eye and say very firmly, we do NOT (fill in the blank.) Put her in a short time out EVERY time. If she wants to throw a fit, just ignore it. Do not try to reason with her or bribe her, that gives her even more room to manipulate you.
You must get some control now, it will only get worse if you don't!

couple of things here: age 3 is far worse than 2. Forget the terrible 2s.....3 is when they have the smart mouth to go with the inappropriate tantrums!

2nd: you are expecting. Children express anxiety prior to birth of a sibling. She is testing you. I recently went thru months of this with one of my daycare kids....she was Heck on Wheels for 3 months prior to her sister's arrival. Life calmed down magically after that....

3rd: please watch the video "1-2-3 Magic". It will teach you how to discipline, it will save your life!

& 4th: never, ever let her see you sweat....& don't feel guilt (especially with the Gma end of it). You are Mom.....hear you roar. You are Boss....Peace.