I always put my boys in their beds, not just their room, but physically in bed, until they can come out and talk to me appropriately. If they come out and don't say "sorry for..." or if they are still being adamant and inappropriate then they find themselves right back in their bed. If they find something to play with while in bed I take it away until they can come talk to me appropriately. We have a list of "Mom's House Rules" posted in the kitchen and the rule that gets pointed out the most is "If Mom says it, do it!" When they act out I tell them what I expect them to do and if they don't do it immediately I point out the rule and they usually comply. Having it written down some place they can see the rule often helps with compliance (visual aid). If they still don't comply I physically take them to their rooms until they do comply. I've had to carry them a few times kicking and screaming and I've had to lead them by the hand a few other times but they have finally learned not to talk back to me or they're in trouble and have to go to their room. It works for meltdowns, too.