3 Month Old Won't Take a Bottle at Daycare

My baby did the exact same thing but would not take the bottle from ANYONE ever. I had to go back to work at 3 months and she would just starve all day. She was very stubborn but finally began to take the bottle after a few weeks, and just a little bit at first. It about killed me, but she didn't lose weight and was OK. Making sure the bottle nipples were warm and small helped - but we tried everything and nothing made a huge difference. She was just stubborn and finally realized she wasn't going to win.

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B.-
Hang in there! My daughter went back at 12 weeks, though it was only part-time. She had never taken a bottle before going to daycare, so I was really worried. After a week or so, of her only taking a little bit from a bottle (and giving the daycare 3 different bottles to try), she began to be comfortable and drink breastmilk from bottles. I still go every day at lunch to feed her myself. I do this for both of us--it breaks up the day and the time away from her. I definitely recommend you go over at least once a day--it feels wonderful, connects you two and unlike the bottle, they get the amount they actually want from breastfeeding. It seems like she always eats a lot at lunch. I then feed her again when I pick her up. If your boss is supportive--go for it! You won't be sorry for the time you spend with her. And ignore the guilt you feel after reading some of these responses--some people have to or want to work and it's okay. You are also very close, so maybe have them try a little harder one day and if he still won't take it after a bit, have them call you and go over. Each time, you can lengthen the time before you go. Hopefully he will feel comfortable soon (and hopefully like several people said below, the daycare person takes the time to feed the milk properly). Hang in there--it will get better. -J.

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As a mom of three and a daycare provider, I have a few ideas. We have had several "bottle fighters" in our center. One child just needed to smell his mom, so she left us a "blankie" (could be a tshirt, pillowcase, or towel too) to lay over our shoulder when he ate. He would eat fitfully and sleep. Another child needed to be propped in a bouncer or carseat, out of sight of the one feeding her (we sat off to the side or behind the chair and held her bottle). If she couldn't see who was feeding her, she didn't descriminate and took her bottle much better. We have had several that just needed to be HUNGRY, which meant crying it out as well. This may sound harsh but it took squirting the breast milk out of the bottle into one childs crying mouth to give her a taste before she would latch on. All these children used Playtex drop in bottles with latex (brown) nipples, as they are very soft and must feel natural. Hope this helps!

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Breast fed babies prefer to be breast fed. if you don't mind going over there and nursing him, then i'd say stay with it and enjoy a perk that few moms and babies get to have. babies get so much from the skin to skin contact with their mothers that it is probably really good for him that you can do this and helping ease his transition to being away from you during the day. i think it depends on what you want for you and for him. if you want to nurse for a while, nursing begets nursing. if extended nursing is not a goal, i would check out dr sears the baby book, there are recommendations in there for going to a bottle for going back to work. i will say that a nursing relationship is a precious thing and i wouldn't be in a hurry to end it, because when it's over it's over. it sounds like you have a good work situation, maybe you can keep "milking" it. :)

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Yuck, going back to work full time is hard- I know, I just started back as well, although i'm fortunate enough to work only 3 days a week (12 hour shifts) and my daughter is with grandparents or my husband. First off, I just want you to know that you are not a bad mommy for working and that staying at home just isn't a possibility for some. Your son knows you love him and your working is not going to delay him or scar him for life (sometimes I wonder if it would be better if more parents stayed home when they had teenagers than with the babies...)
Your son is just getting used to new surroundings and people, it'll just take some time. Make sure the daycare is heating up the bottle enough- turns out my daughter likes the milk quite a bit hotter than we thought! Also, make sure he's hungry when they are trying to feed him, that they aren't simmply feeding on schedule/convenience, but that they also aren't letting him get so worked up waiting for the bottle that he's too mad to eat. Other than that, just keep taking your breaks to feed him after daycare has offered the bottle (he's too young to remember the cause/effect of "not eating brings mommy to my side"), enjoy these snipits with him during the day because I bet he'll start taking the bottle as he gets more comfortable there, and love on him at night! Oh- and send your amazing boss some chocolate for being so understanding!
Good luck!

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Yes, babies need their mothers. I'm so glad to see that you are breastfeeding after returning to work. I'm telling you that that is what got me throught the time I had to work when my children were babies. I had to continue working when the first was born (went back at 4 months) and the second (went back at 3 months), but got to stay home when she was 6 months and on. The third has never known Mommy to work daily, and ironically, is the one who never objected to an occasional bottle (always breastmilk). My second child absolutely refused to take any bottle at daycare or anywhere for several weeks after I returned to work. (BTW-you might try a different bottle. My kids preferred the Playtex rounded nipples.)I ended up rushing over and nursing her just to get us through the day. Thank goodness I only had to work for 3 months more.
Keep up the good work, B.. You're doing the right thing. A great reference on all things baby is The Baby Book by Dr. Sears. Very down to earth and realistic. Keep us posted.

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B.,

I would keep going over to breastfeed as long as you can. Practically, it will keep your milk supply up so you can continue breastfeeding. Pumping does not provide the same amount of stimulation for your breasts, so while many mothers do very well at first, most moms who pump breastmilk stop doing so by the time baby is about 6-9 months old. The longer you can breastfeed your baby, the better his health (and yours!) will be. Emotionally, this also provides a great time when you guys can reconnect. It is very stressful for a baby to be separated from his mama. While you have to do what you have to do, these nursing breaks reassure him that you are there for him, and can also keep you from feeling disconnected from him during the day. As another poster said, nursing is about so much more than just getting food in the baby - it is about comfort, love and connection, and that is something that cannot be replaced.

As baby gets older, he will be able to be apart from you for longer periods. I know this tiny baby phase is INTENSE, but it does not last forever. Before you know it, he will be happily waving goodbye to you as he runs off to play!

Best,
S. L

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