If anyone out there has gone through this and can offer some advice, I would be GREATLY appreciative. My daughter has always been an excellent sleeper. She started sleeping through the night at 8 weeks and has always been in her own room in her own crib. Suddenly, for the past 6 nights, she wakes up screaming (almost like she had a nightmare or something) and will not go back to sleep unless I pull her into bed with my husband and I. I love my daughter to death but sleeping with her is like going a few rounds in the boxing ring. She flails around like a mixture of the Tasmanian Devil with a blender. She may get some sleep but the rest of the night is shot for my husband and I. I have tried transporting her back into her crib once she falls asleep and then lo and behold, approximately 1 to 2 hours later she is up screaming again. Her daily routine has not changed. She watched minimal TV and has not been introduced into any new stressful situations that I know of. She has private childcare with family and her daily routine has not changed from that. I cannot figure this out and I do not want to start a pattern of co-sleeping. I have never wanted to do that as my sister still has my 7 year old niece sleeping with them and they NEVER get any sleep. My husband and I both have to work and we both need at least 7 hours of sleep to function properly. Lately, this has not been happening. I am also in the early stages of pregnancy #2 so I am doubly exhausted. We are at our wits end and the frustration is building since we are both lacking the sleep that normally makes us charming and nice individuals. :) Any advice is WELCOME!
Maybe try getting her a toddler bed because then she will think she is just like mommy and daddy. She might very well be having nightmares I know my daughter did at that age she still has them once in awhile. Good luck and I hope you get some sleep!
H.
My son went through a phase where he woke up an hour or so after going to sleep EVERY night.
I was lucky to receive this book, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, by Marc Weissbluth, MD.
There is a lot of information in the book, including medical and biological reasons for the way we sleep, why it's good, etc. But really, once you get into the sections with ages and routines and suggested ideas for good sleep, it's not quite such "deep" information. (I must say, I liked the stuff in the introduction, even though I didn't understand every single word of it!! I liked knowing the benefits of good sleep, etc.)
The thing that I first thought of when I read your post was that your daughter is just at the point where she's needing to learn to soothe herself back to sleep. There's a number of suggestions about the amount of crying you're willing to tolerate while you go through that process, in the book, and when I did it, I'll be honest, I just let my son cry. It was excruciating. Every minute crying seems like SO LONG!!! It was horrible. I doubted myself. But eventually, my wonderful little sleeper returned. Now, it's a joy to listen to him in his crib every night. He is SO CUTE when he's winding down for the night. He talks, he sings, it's precious!! He only cries very rarely, usually when something out of the routine is going on.
Good luck to you, you'll figure it out!!
It makes me wonder if your little girl is having night-tares. My daughter went through the same thing. I read up on them. They are like nightmares only they are unable to realize they are still sleeping. I read that you should NOT wake them you should comfort them and make them feel safe. You can read up on them on babycenter.
It is probably a faze that will pass on its own as long as you don't make a habit of bringing her to bed with you. I've learned that the hard way. If I let my daughter sleep with me even once for a couple hours in the morning, its a fight for the rest of the week with her not wanting to go back to her own bed. It doesn't really sound like night terrors if she calms down when you come to get her. It is probably seperation anxiety.
Hello,
Believe me I can sypathize with what you are going through. Even if she hasn't gone through a particularly stressful situation lately she still might be suffering from seperation anxiety. If it is that my recommendation is to leave her in her crib and either sit in there with her a few minutes so she knows you're there, or to just let her cry it out. When my daughter went through this it was because she didn't like her crib. I got her a toddler bed and pretty quickly she started sleeping through the night again. There are drawbacks to a toddler bed, she can get up on her own, but that's because she needs to be taught to stay in bed on her own. I am sincerely sorry that you aren't getting much sleep, but kids go through stages and she will probably get out of this awful stage soon. I hope it goes well.
A.
Hi!
I feel for you. My son started this pattern at abot 2 years old. I let him sleep with me and he self weaned back to his bed 15 months later. (with some tricks)He too was thrashing keeping me from sleeping. What's interesting is that before and after that phase, he sleeps like a rock. I believe that her need to be with you is real and will get worse if not honored. We attend COOP preschool and the parent educator addressed this at a meeting. She reminded us that we adults don't sleep alone or isolated, why should we expect such little ones to. Provided there is no medical issue, she needs more security right now. It may be a developmental leap, sensing something is changing because of your pregnancy (they pick up on the subtlest stuff), something at her daycare that noone has picked up on. Because she can't tell you her fears, she is acting them out. Some great resources are Dr. Sears parenting website, Dr. Greenspan books and "Parenting with Fire" by that Rabbi who was on the talk circuit recently. Good Luck
You mentioned at the end that you are pregnant...that is a very big change in a child's life...!
They sense changes going on with you. Have you and your husband started talking about the pregnancy with or without your daughter?
I have a 4 month old little girl and a son who just turned 3. He started getting really clingy in the early stages of my pregnancy. He no longer wanted to be left at preschool, stuff like that. I was told that kids can feel/sense the changes going on in you and it must be true because my son did. He has settled down now and is fine but we went through about 6 months of him being weird.
I'm guessing she either senses your pregnancy or you've already started discussing it with her.
If you don't want it to become a nightly routine, you should stop bringing her into your bed! She now knows that if she cries, you'll bring her into your bed. She gets a big payoff for crying and the more she cries, she knows she'll end up in your bed. Try letting her cry. She should just fall asleep. You can comfort her with hugs and kisses but leave her in her bed.
Kids are good at spoofing the parents!
Good luck.
My daughter went through this, too -- in fact, I posted something about it when it was happening. It was a nightmare. It was not night terrors for us -- she has those on occasion, so we knew what to look for. This was more a matter of she suddenly did not want to be out of mom and dad's presence (separation anxiety). We went for about a week of letting her fall asleep in our arms (with her waking up throughout the night), before we just had to put our collective foot down and let her cry it out. It took about a week of her literally falling asleep sitting up (she would weave in place before she just crashed -- after crying for several minutes first) before things straightened out again. Now she's back to being a wonderful little sleeper.
I agree with the other moms that letting your baby cry is a horribly difficult thing to do ... but we know a pediatrician who says that one of the best gifts you can give your child is the ability to soothe themselves.
Good luck!!!!
did she recently have vaccines? if so, she may need to detox. could it be related to your new pregnancy? if you are sure it is neither of those, i would take her off of wheat and dairy for a week or two and see if it stops. if not, you might find a way to put her bed or a little blow up mattress in your bedroom. Hope this helps.
You poor thing! It sounds similar to what my oldest daughter went through although most of the time her's was most obvious when she slept somewhere other than her own bed...trips to grandparents, and such. I think it was night terrors. It's a simple problem that children have. I'm not certain but she would wake up screaming and crying, and not know why. This happened for a few years. I also learned to wake her up and take her to the restroom. She would "go" and go back to bed and fall asleep with no problems. I certainly hope this works, I have to have 8 hours of sleep to function so I feel for you! Best of luck.
It could be night terrors, read the sleep lady book for great tips
