2 Yr Old Afraid of Shadows...

I like all of the suggestions I have read and probably would try all of them if my son was in the same situation. I think the one I like the best though is to ask her to show you the shadow next time she sees it. If you can figure out what's making it, you can not only fix the problem, but use at as a learning experience for her so that she knows that's all it was.

However, I am going to go one extra step that no one has suggested. If you CAN'T see the shadow that she sees, or if it is gone when you go to see it, it may be paranormal. It is not uncommon for little children to be more sensitive to the paranormal. My best suggestion would be to emphasize that shadows can't hurt her and then utilize some of the other suggestions that the ladies left so she knows she's in power. In addition, you can always have your house blessed. In the Catholic faith, many people choose to have their house blessed when they first move in. It has nothing to the with ghosts or exorcism, it is just a nice way to start your life in that house.

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Hurray for Linda G! She's the only one who believed it might be real.

Please don't dismiss your daughter's fears as irrational. Linda is right - and I have first hand experience with it - children are much more sensitive to the spirit world, and it will be around 3 to 3 1/2 that she starts to lose that sensitivity.

My son would tell us about a woman who visited him in his room and talked to him. (he was 20 months at the time) We never doubted him, because we have no problem accepting the spirit world. We asked him what they talked about, and what the woman looked like and such. He gave great detail, and the detail never varied. He said she was very nice and was just there to watch him.

One day it occurred to me that I had never asked him if she had a name. He said her name was Karen. Please understand that at that time, he had never met a Karen, we didn't know anyone named Karen, and he was not yet allowed to watch television, so we knew it didn't come from an outside source.

However, my husband had a sister named Karen (whom we had never mentioned around our son) and she had died in 1986. My son was born in 1999. We have no doubt that it was his sister, and that she continues to watch over our children.

Catholics aren't the only ones to have house blessings. We are Lutheran, and had our Pastor come and bless our house, also. As Linda said, it's just a blessing, and gives great comfort to us, knowing that we have consciously invited Christ into our house, to be part of our lives and home everyday.

Although Karen wasn't the only "imaginary" friend that our son had (he had many), none of them were ever scary to him. He wasn't afraid of any of them, which tells me that the house blessing worked. Only the good spirits came through. So please consider having it done, so that your daughter doesn't have to deal with the scary shadow anymore.

Of course, you can always write me off as a nutcase! :) But if you knew me, and knew how practical and down to earth I am, you would take me seriously.

Best of luck - I hope it works out SOON for your little one.
J.

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Hi M.,

I went through this with my son (who is now 33!). When he was going through this I decided to ask him to show me the shadow. I went into his room and turned off the light and was startled myself at what I saw. The neighbors front lawn lamp along with the branch of our tree cast the shadow of a huge hand! Kind of like King Kong reaching for him! I'll tell ya, it WAS scary. After that, I made a point of checking his room with the light off to be sure there weren't any scary shadows around. A night light solved the problem and we didn't have any shadow problems after that. So ask your little girl to show you the scary shadows. It might just do the trick!

Good Luck!
M.

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I have a great idea M.. My little guy was afraid of monsters.... which were actually shadows. I got a can air freshener and labled it Monster spray. I just told him that it was going to be alright. I'd make him go all around the room and show me the scary places, then I'd give them a good zap with the air freshener. He felt safe, the room smelled good, we were all happy. Might be worth a try. Tell her that the shadows need a little magic fairy spray and that they won't hurt her. Sure, you're playing into her fantasy a bit, but she is 2!!! Go with it. Just might work. I swear by it.
The other thing I found helpful is to take the nightlight out of the room. Two reasons. It gives them something to play with ( specifically in my son's case) and it also removes a light source to cause shadows. It too, made a big difference in the monsters showing up at our house. ;)Good luck!!

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I hate to be the one to voice somthing like this but is her room safe? Does she have a window that someone could be looking into? A street light that is allowing her to see people walk by at night? I'm sorry she is afraid. I think many of the suggestions are good. She may like the veggies tales song "God is bigger then the boogie man" too. My kids always liked it when they were smaller and it helped them get over their fears at bedtime when we sang it together. Good luck :)

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Think about what her bedroom is like when she is in there at night. Is there a street light or nightlight illuminating things in her room. Get a dimmer switch and set the room light on super low...no shadows but still dim.

My son was afraid of shadows, too. Since logic didn't help, we resorted to "magic". We tried "monster spray". It's just air freshener. We told our DS that there wasn't anything bad in the room - just shadows. But, if it would make him feel better, we'd use the magic spray. It smells nice, and everyone knows bad things can't tolerate anything that's nice. Then, we sprayed a little air freshener. It worked. At first he needed it every night, and then only when it was raining loudly, and now he doesn't ask at all. He's 5 now.

Could it be a form of separation anxiety? Has anything changed that would cause her to be more scared? Does it happen more when Daddy is home, as a way to keep your attention - that she has undivided when Daddy travels? "Shadows" could just be what she has found to work to get more attention from you, especially when ti is time for bed.

I don't think it is on tv anymore but it might help if you can find some of the Bear in the Big Blue House programs. There is a character on there called shadow and she sings about watching over you when you sleep in a positive way. I hope this helps you. Let me know if you find it and it works. I remember it all only because I have a 9 yr old that use to watch faithfully. Good luck, Shannon

maybe you could take her to play in a shadow/light room at a science museum? some positive association with shadows might help...

there's a character in bear's big blue house named shadow... not sure if that would help or hurt but she's a funny little shadow gal who dances and tells stories. (her stories are paper cutout shadow stories)

have you played shadow tag outside? "i'm going to step on your shadow!!" we love that game. it's just fun to see your shadow on the sidewalk and realize it's yours...

It just a phase that kids go through. Their imagination is working overtime. The best you can do is reasure her that everything is okay and that you won't let anything happen to her. Have her tell the shadow to go away that she doesn't want it there. If she needs your help, hold her hand and tell it to go away firmly. That way she can see how its done. Also make sure that she is not watching anything scarey on TV. Its crazy, but what you and I think is okay may be creating more in her imagination. It does take time. We also gave my son a gold star for everytime that he told the monster or shadow to go away and wasn't scared.

There are books about shadows.
Search on Amazon for titles & then maybe check out your local half price books for them.
I also think you should check the room for the real shadows that she is refering to.

We had the same problem with our oldest when she was around that age - and her fear also started because my husband did shadow puppets with her. What worked for me was one night at bedtime, when she was in the room, I opened her room and shouted "Out, all shadows, Out out out," and pretended I was shooing them out the window. Then I closed the window and locked it, and told her the shadows had all gone outside and couldn't get back in because I locked the window. She's five now, and at bedtime, if her window is open, she still asks to have her window closed and locked to keep the "shadows" out, but she sleeps fine and isn't afraid.

I'm a mother of three, a five year old daughter, a 3 year old daughter, and a 3 month old son.

Good Luck.