Hi Parents, i really need your advice!!! I babysit my two year old grandson everyday. He just recently started climbing out of his crib so now i put him down for a nap in my bedroom. He use to love nap time, he would even try to go up the stairs to get in his crib. I can not let him sleep up there any more because I'm afraid he will fall down the stairs. At first it was fine, we would read books and then he would just fall asleep. His parents won't make him take a nap on the three days they have him, they don't want to deal with it, (he is very very stubborn) so they just don't give him a nap, and at night time they wait until he falls asleep on the couch in the living room and then carry him to bed, because they can't get him to stay in his new little bed. Last week i lay-ed in my bed with him and we would read, then he falls asleep and i sneak out. Now this week he won't let me read and he screams and screams. I've never given into him and i still lay in the bed with him but he wants on the floor so i give him a pillow and he eventually crys himself to sleep. (usually about 10 minutes) Today was horrible, he was overly tired for one thing, he kept kicking the door, knocked everything off my dresser, opened and shut the draws, just being uncontrollable. I could not get him to calm down.. He got a time out, i tried to look him in the eyes and explaining to him , I tried bribing him with things we could do after we rested, i even gave him a little spanking. He cry-ed and screamed 35 minute. I don't know what i should do!! I think he is to young to not have a nap. He really enjoys sleeping, he will take a 2 hour nap. Should i try making him lay down in the living room in front of the TV? How wrong is that? I think it is the only way i can get him to nap. HELP
At that age, my son went through a phase of trying to avoid naps. It was put him into bed, walk out of room, put him back into bed, etc (Super Nanny style). Sometimes I would lay with him, but I didn't want that to be the only way he'd fall asleep. I used my son's bed for naps and he stuck to his crib for bedtime. I actually started giving him a choice as well - crib or bed. Sometimes that helped. Good luck.
Two words of advice: Crib Tent.
You can find crib tents at Target, Babies'r'Us, and online. It sounds to me like your grandson needs to be back in his crib to take his naps and keeping him safe with the crib tent is a perfect solution. You can put in a few books and soft toys in his bed to keep him happy if he doesn't nap, but two year olds still do need a nap. His outburst was from pure exhaustion.
And not to sound harsh or critical to your grandson's parents, but they really should start a bedtime routine so their little boy learns to fall asleep in his bed and not in front of the TV.
Good luck!
As a grandparent, you have to be really careful about overstepping your boundaries. I've been around and around with my in-laws because they either won't enforce our rules or they think they deserve more say in something than I believe they do...HOWEVER-
This sounds like a situation where the parent isn't paying close enough attention to the needs of their child. It's simple science, children need sleep, a 2 year old should be sleeping 12-15 hours a day..AT LEAST. It's a health issue and consistency is the ONLY way to make it happen. I say, do whatever you have to to ensure that he sleeps. Lay down with him, whatever he needs. It sounds like a situation where you should gently address if with the parents. That's just purely lazy to not have your child nap and it will lead to weight issues, health issues, etc. Just be consistent in whatever you do, that's key. You all need to make a plan together that helps this poor little person get the rest he needs and wants!
He is too young to stop the naps...so keep giving them to him. Once my baby started climbing out of the crib, my peditrician recommended the crib tent and SAVED MY LIFE....she still sleeps with the crib tent (although I will say the first 2 days were an adjustment)...something to look into...I found 2 of them...one from Craigslist and the other I had order offline. I never did find one sold in stores..but I think walmart.com carries them
If you dont want to go that route, what worked for ME when I was a kid was my grandma promised me cookies (or something) once I woke up from my nap but I have to not cry and go to sleep. Once I woke up I got my cookie and I STILL remember them even though I am 34. I still think the cribtent is great though
Yes he still needs a nap.
I give you a high-five for instilling this... because his own parents won't and don't want to deal with it.
Anyway, at 2 years old, they DO get like this and with tweaks in their naps/sleep times.
Both my kids did that.
I simply KEPT to the daily nap routines. And grinned and beared it... but did not relent. I DID have nap time. And they knew I would not give in to their occasional protests. And then it passes.
If he will nap on the floor, then so be it.
Both my kids, at THAT age, when through a phase, where they wanted to nap on the floor too. So that's fine. They got sleep that way. Then, I made it clear, it was only for now... not always. Then one blue moon, they did again sleep/nap in their beds. With no rhyme or reason. Just a phase.
You need to discipline him for wrecking your room and for kicking everything off your dresser. MAKE him pick it up and APOLOGIZE to you etc.
He was/is, probably over-tired. Over-tired kids, get unreasonable and fussy and willful.
But do not allow him, to destroy things.... you are his Grandma... he must show respect. Do what you think is best to correct him on that....
ALSO, for a toddler boy... make SURE he gets LOTS of runaround activity in the MORNING... boys need that, to expend their energy & tired them out. Then, PRIOR to actual nap time, make everything QUIET and calm.... allow him to "un-wind" and wind-down first... while verbally "cuing" him that nap time is coming up... so to get ready. Then, so be it, let him watch a CALM tv show if you must. My son likes "Little Bear" for example.
For my kids as they got older, they needed at least 1/2 hour to wind-down PRIOR to their actual nap or bedtime. To key them down. That is important to do, BEFORE actual nap time.
ALSO make it clear to him, that in YOUR house, he NAPS. Say "That is the rule...."
all the best,
Susan
Crib tent!! And I think it is a phase too.
Even with the crib tent you may want to put a baby gate in his door too, just in case he is too smart.
He is so pushing his boundaries right now. You need to be consistent and don't cave. It sounds like you are doing the right thing, and that you are having to fight inconsistencies that he has the rest of the week. But, if he knows the rules at your house, he should be able to adjust.
How much sleep is he getting at night? My kids quit naps at 18 months - but they slept 12-14 hours at night. They have quiet time after lunch where they sit and watch some PBS shows but as long as they get the 12-15 hours of sleep each night, they are fine.
As for falling asleep in front of the TV I've read many studies about how bad that is for anyone to do (adults or children) it can lead to nightmares and restless sleep - something about the flashing images and all that.
I just re-read Tracy Hogg's "The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems" (pretentious title but a helpful resource!) because I was having a temporary issue with my daughter's sleep. A lot of her suggestions would apply to a situation like yours and I strongly suggest checking this book out. One thing that you don't mention is trying to lie down with him until he sleeps? That used to work for my daughter, and is suggested in the book above. You would want to focus on the Toddler section. Please, please do not put him in front of the TV--it will lead to lifelong sleep problems, I guarantee.
I'm sure he doesn't want to nap with you because it isn't routine in his other house. I totally agree with the Reluctant Texan. I hope that you can talk with your own child about having more persistence in teaching him to sleep on his own, including napping. Daytime sleep impacts nighttime sleep--if he is overtired it will be harder for him to get to sleep at night, too! Maybe you can use this to gently introduce the topic?
Whatever you decide to do, know that you are a real stand-up grandma for a) babysitting your grandson in the first place and b) asking for help!
From what you describe, I think you are right, he still needs a nap. If his parents are giving in on this now because they don't want to fight him, they are really in for it later, but that's a separate issue! (I have a couple of strong willed children of my own!)
I agree with another poster that he should be disciplined for wrecking our room - picking up the things he knocked over & apologizing, but, again, that's not what you asked.
As for the TV issue, let me first say I am not a fan of TV. My kids watch very little. However, I think it would be perfectly okay for you to lay with him with the TV on. Obviously not something that is going get him wired up. Maybe not even a "kid show." Maybe something more for you that's not inappropriate for him to see, but just not exciting either.
Another idea to try is to let him have a "quiet time" instead of a nap. (I am not sure if he is a young 2 or older 2, so he may be too young for this.) After reading (if you still do that) let him have some books he can look at. Maybe he doesn't have to lay down, but needs to stay in one spot in your room and be quiet. Give him a little control over nap/quiet time. Play some calming music. When my older 2 girls were beginning to outgrow naptime I would play a CD while they laid down (a longer one, no less than half hour and closer to an hour long.) The rule was they had to stay in bed until the CD was over, but if they were still awake when it was they could get up.
Good luck! Sounds like you've got your hands full, but I think you are doing the right thing!
***** The Crib Tents have been recalled******
I'm a big fan of the crib tent and had them for the cribs as well as pack n plays b/c we traveled so much with the kids. They have recently been recalled due to a strangulation death.... the clips that held them were slipping off leaving gaps that a little boy's head got stuck in and he died.
This being said the recall fix is new clips so make sure you buy a new one if you go this route. My kids were at the point that they zipped themselves up in them!! IF you're comfortable with the new clips I would go this route.
tots n mind is where I bought mine. Good luck!
