2 Year Old Not Talking.

Hey there L.,
Here's my feedback to your message...You're son is different from your daughter and different from his playmates. Saying he "won't talk" and that he has "selective hearing" and that the other kids in daycare are more productive makes me cringe!
Growing up my sister, 2 years older than me, was very verbal and talked contantly. I didn't talk until I was 3 (so my parents say). I didn't need to. I certainly don't have any concious recolection of not wanting to listen or speak...it's just the way it was.
I had two boys, 11.5 months apart. The oldest didn't speak very much until one day he rattled off the ABC's Sesame street style when he was a little more than two and I was shocked. When his brother was two he didn't say many words, but made a lot of attempts. When he was three and in preschool his teacher used to ask me to translate for him because he was so difficult to understand. Long story short his hearing was fine according to the tests. When he was 4.5 almost 5 we had a doctors visit for a bad cold and slight fever. It was the first time he had ever complained of ear pain and was rubbing his ear. When the doctor looked inside he made a horrible face. He asked me to look through the scope and pointed out how terribly inflamed his inner ear was.
The doctor couldn't believe my son wasn't screaming in pain. Fast forward a few months...I complained to the doctor that my son couldn't pronounce words with more than 2 syllables. After going to a learning psychologist for further testing and evaluation found out that my son had not learned to "sounds" of our language because of muttled hearing and excessive fluid in his ears during those ear infections. Not all kids experience fever and pain therefore I didn't know what was going on. Our original pediatrician said that unless there was a fever of at least 100 degrees that there was no infection. Turns out that was bad advice and not true.
My son was later diagnosed with auditory dyslexia or auditory processing disorder after he entered kindergarden.
He loved school, loved interacting with other kids, and did a darn good job trying to communicate with us...we just couldn't understand him.
PLEASE RELAX and keep your anxiety about all this away from him. The more you preasure your son to talk and talk about the "problem" in front of him (they hear everything you say)the more stress you're putting on him. Until he is older and more mature there is no way to KNOW for SURE what the deal is.
Teach your oldest to give her brother time to say what he wants and not to rush in to speak for him. That's the first lesson our psychologist taught us. My older son was always quick to help...the younger one didn't NEED to learn to say "I want a drink" or "My ear hurts".
Please be patient with him and stay away from people who make you feel like you need to judge your own child because he's not like theirs.
Peace
AC

2 moms found this helpful

Schedule an appointment with a developmental pediatrician to evaluate for speech/language issues among other things. Do not delay!!!! The sooner you start therapy the better. If everything is fine you haven't hurt him by just checking. Too many pediatricians are not referring in a timely fashion. The recommendation is 18 months.
You won't regret it.
And yes, many others have this problem and wish they were referred earlier. (Also, don't listen to those who tell you he'll outgrow it.)
Good luck, All will be fine with a little work :-)

1 mom found this helpful

Hello my name is stephaine and iam a mother of three!! I aslo have a two year old who is not talking to much!! I was refered to alta regional services and they are free they help with speech therapy!!! Till they are three years of age!! If you want i can give you the information on it!! It is free so that is great!! Thankm you and i hope this helps you S.

1 mom found this helpful

If you don't have this book, get it.
he Everything Toddler Book: From Controlling Tantrums to Potty Training, Practical Advice to Get You and Your Toddler Through the Formative Years (Everything Series) by Linda Sonna (Paperback - Mar 1, 2002)
Buy new: $14.95

It will let you know what your child should be doing at each stage of development. It will also help you feel more prepared, even though you have a 10 yr old it might help.

Turn off the TV and give him paper to shred, blocks to build with, balls to kick (outside), etc. Invest in a big block set. He can build and destroy and build again. You can build together. As you build, you talk and don't expect it of him. He'll get there.

Do others talk for him? My cousin had older sisters(by 10 and 12 yrs) who talked for her until she was 3. She didn't need to speak. Then one day, she spoke in full sentences, clearly articulating her ideas, and they stopped talking for her.

Follow up with the dr. if you are still concerned after the hearing assessment.
Stephanie

Just a few suggestions to add to the others. . .it sounds like he is getting plenty of socializing with kids his age. . .so I'd make a call to ALTA Regional Center - it is a free service to evaluate kids and keep them on target. I had my son (now 5) evaluated for the same issue when he was 18 mos. I justed didn't want him to get to behind. Most likely, your son is just focused on "physical" and will at some point move to the talking stage. . .but just to be on the safe side, I'd call ALTA. Again, it's free. They come to you and evaluate him on all aspects and if they feel he needs speech therapy, they pay for it. Once he is three, they refer him (you) to the local school district. So get him in before he turns three.

Lastly, I used the Baby Bumble Bee video series which seemed to help. . .you mentioned he like to watch TV, this is another idea. You can order them on line.

L.,
I understand what you are going through...my first son was the same way. After ruling out a hearing problem, the doctor sent his name to the Regional Center of the East Bay and they did some test with him and found that he indeed has a language delay. They set him up with speech therapy then with speach classes at our local Special Education School. He is now in a Special Ed preschool doing really well with his language aquisition and speech.
I'm glad that I had a pro-active doctor that didn't wait until he was older to get moving on the testing.
If you want to talk more about this, please send me a message, I am more than willing to answer questions and hopefully, let you breath a sigh of relief!

C.

At Autism Speaks they have a check list of signs to look for.It's worth a check. I have a six year old with ASD, and a three year old with PDD-NOS. I do not like to say that it's the automatic answer, but it can rule out things also.
Good luck.

These are good sites with information on developmental speech milestones:
<http://www.nidcd.nih.gov/health/voice/speechandlanguage.a...;
<http://www.childdevelopmentinfo.com/development/language_...;

Having only 10 words at the age of 2 was an indication that my son had a speech delay.
Children at 2 usually have a vocabulary of between 100-200 words. They don't always
speak in sentences, however.

My child at 2 also had only 10 words and seemed tuned out too. Early intervention with speech therapy has helped him tremendously.

For an evaluation through the California Dept. of Ed.and information on Early Start
visit <http://www.dds.ca.gov/earlystart/&gt;.

Hi L.,

Don't worry, this to me sounds completely normal, especially after having done the hearing test. A lot has to do with your childs personality. Maybe if you have him play with more children his age, he'll open up and conversate with them. Children feel more comfortable speaking aroung kids their age.

Take care!

my best friends son is 3 and a half and just started understanding what he was saying. they are sending him to a special school the county i believe is paying for.

I think you might try is when he wants something tell him to use words and have him try to repeat your words....just a thought

As far as the talking, he may feel like he doesn't need to at this point in time. If he goes to daycare with alot of other children, he may be shy or perhaps the other children voice what he's thinking or wanting so he doesn't have the need to speak for himself. You might not think he's learning what you're trying to teach him, but one day he'll pop out with something you've taught him and then you'll know he was listening and he did learn afterall. Some children don't try out a new skill in front of others until they have it down solid. It could be that your little one will just one day pop out with a bunch of words and then you'll be pulling your hair out because he'll talk to you constantly. At 2, I wouldn't worry too much. You might try not anticipating his wants and needs and letting him know that if he wants something, he has to ask for it. My nephew didn't talk until he was about 3 years old because my sister always anticipated what he wanted and provided it to him without his having to ask. My mother stepped in and didn't allow that to go on; needless to say my sister was mad, but it worked and within a short time he was VERY verbal. Hope this helps!

Hello I am also a single mom of 3 boys twins age 8 and my oldest son age 9 (14 mos apart crazy huh). My oldest was like that he didn't speak much but was a really bright baby, he just wasn't interested in talking. I begin not to give him what he wanted unless he used or at least try to say the words. If when he grunts or points and you give him what he wants then why should he talk? It was hard at first because he would cry and get frustrated but it worked out. He's 9 now and is doing awesome he is a "A" student and loves to read. The light bulb will come on, hes' just taking his time.

Hi L.. I would definitely call the Early Start in your area. They'll be able to identify if there are potential issues or not. My son had 5 words at age 2 and was considered to be at a 9-12 month level. I thought we only had speech issues, but it turned out my son also has sensory processing disorder, hypotonia, and gait issues. We were approved for services and have been receiving 1 hour of speech in my home every week and 1 hour of physical/occupational therapy at their center for the past year. He's improved greatly in most areas, however he's recently been diagnosed with verbal apraxia (childhood apraxia of speech).
He'll be 3 on Friday, so we're switching over to the school district. They don't have the same level of services as the Early Start in our area, so I'm especially grateful I had this past year to figure out what's going on with my son.

Hi L.!

My oldest boy was a "late talker", so I wouldn't worry. They talk when they're ready, and when they're ready, they don't stop! :o)

I would encourage him to "use his words". I made the mistake of re-acting to my son's actions. I KNEW he was thirsty, so I got him a drink, instead of making him ask for it. Little things like that are important when they are developing their speech. So, I would just be aware af things like that.

Give him the words to use, like "more please", "No Thank you", "Yes, I want a drink", etc... He will eventually use them on his own, but only if he's expected to :o)

All kids are different, so he may just be the way he is because that's the way he is.

HOwever I do have one suggestion, but may be hard to implement because he has older siblings. Turn off the TV for him. Don't let him watch anything even approaching the length of a movie. Fifteen minutes per day max is my suggestion. The American Academy of Pediatrics guidelines are that no child under (5?) watch any TV at all anyday. Pretty strict, but its because TV is just not interactive, and in my view harms the development of social skills. Rather than watch a move with big brother for an hour and half, they should be outside kicking a ball. I know its getting difficult having baby around such mixed ages, I find that baby no. 3 kind of takes care of herself, and I have to remind myself to do things especially with her, and that are age-appropriate. Language development does require one-on-one time so that babies can understand turn-taking in a conversation, be able to describe things and to help the identify feelings.

Good luck.

Hi L.-
A girlfriend of mine went through a similar situation with their youngest son. At the time, their kids were 9 (g), 8 (b) and 2 (b). Although the 9 and 8 year olds both were talking at young ages, the 2 year old's speech was very limited. She had him tested (hearing), went to specialists (speech), did this that and the other to find out what was 'wrong' with him. Bottom line, the 2 year old was just being lazy. Basically, the older kids would give him the cup (for example) when he would point to it. The 2 year old had no reason to talk. He'd point, grunt, etc. when he wanted something and they would all know what he meant. Once they learned that, the parents talked to the older kids and had them say EVERYTHING to the 2 year old before just handing him something. Cup, truck, ball, shoes, etc. Needless to say, he eventually began talking more and more. Talk with your daughter, day care provider, etc. and make sure that they are really talking to your son and saying words to him. Best of luck! :)

If you haven't tried already, start making signs up with him or get a baby sign book. I would also decrease the amount of T.V. and electronics as much as possible. That will help with behavior a ton.

L.,

Hi,

I would check and see if you have an Early Learning Institute- or someplace like it. They have people there that evaluate children in all aspects- physically, emotional, language development etc. and can offer some great advice. Also, if your not already in a play-group-join one! Its fun for the child and also the parent~

M.

I also have a 2 year old that wasn't saying much. For kids under 3 you can have them tested for speech and development thru Alta Regional Center, (http://www.altaregional.org/index.cfm ). They came out and tested my son and he is now getting speech therapy once a week. They come out to your home and it's free! No matter if you are rich or poor. It's worth getting him tested! Speech therapy is very common these days...I wouldn't say your child has a learning disability. Especially if you get speech therapy at such a young age....it you wait, it could become a disability.

Hi L.,
I work with preschoolers with special needs including children with language delays. Parents who have children with language delays describe a very similar situation with their littles ones as what you are describing. I would suggest if you don't see a marked improvement soon, that you request a speech/language evaluation through your insurance or California Alta Regional Center. He'll be assessed by a language pathologist who should be able to answer all of your questions and concerns and determine if he is, in fact, off track in terms of his language development. In the meantime, when speaking to him, be sure to make eye contact with him first. If he doesn't seem to understand what you're asking him to do, demonstrate the action as you ask (e.g. "Close the screen door, please." while helping him close the screen door). Communicate with pictures or actions as much as possible--"Do you want "cereal" or "eggs" while showing him a box of cereal and container of eggs, or telling him to brush his teeth by showing him his toothbrush or running your fingers across your teeth pretending to brush. Language delayed children often times have difficulty understanding spoken language, so adding pictures and gestures to your communication will help him understand what you're trying to say.

Good luck!

You need to refer him ASAP to you local REGIONAL CENTER so that he can receive free services if he qualifies... IT IS VERY IMPORTANT!!! Early intervention is key to helping children catch up to their peers!!! I did, and I am so glad because my children are doing so much better...and the younger the better!!! In any type of delay... not just for autism, but for any speech or type of delays!!!

Love, G.. :0)
http://stemcellforautism.blogspot.com/

Hi L.. Boys are a lot slower than girls!! My son was always slow in talking-- he just started saying full sentences at 3 1/2 whereas my daughter is 2 and already saying 3-4 words put together!! My nephew (2 1/2) & my best friends' son (almost 2) are the same- hardly any words! I wouldn't worry too much, give it a little time. Just practice sentences with him. Eventually he'll catch on. A lot of people worry too much about a timeline in kids development these days! Everybody has a different opinion - (becky down below) but you do what you think is best! Good luck!

L.,
This is obviously very common because I have seen 3 postings about this excat situation in the last month. My son also only said Mommy and Daddy at 2 and nothing else. My pediatritian though was not worried at all she had 3 boys of her own and said that some kids especially boys talk late. I too was not worried because I knew that my brother did not really talk until he was 3. My son is now 4 1/2 and has an extensive vocabulary from reading to him. If you are concerned with him being able to communicate things to you teach him sign language Signing Time videos are great. I taught my son and when he began to speak real well he would sign and say the words, it really helped him and lot less frustration for him.
Good Luck,
C.

L.-

I would go get his hearing checked, it's a good place to start. I would continue searching for answers. If you are writting for advice, that tells me your Mommy instinct is on alert. Listen to your gut. Even it's a speach delay - wouldn't it be nice to know that eveything else is Ok and he's just a late talker?

Remeber - the earlier you can catch things - the more time you have to work with it. Keep pursuing - you'll get an answer.

M.

I too was worried when my son "should have been" saying 50 words and would say maybe a dozen, and not very clear at that. I had his hearing tested. He was fine, so if that was not the issue, then he was just learning at his own pace. It was closer to 28 months when he started having a larger vocabulary. My worries didn't come from myself but from everyone else who was commenting on his lack of vocabulary. Once I had his hearing checked, it gave me peace of mind. I figured I'd eveluate him again around 30 months, but there was no need. If you don't think there anything wrong with him, stop listened to everyone else.

Hi L.,

I agree with Jeanna. You nedd to contact ALTA Regional or your local Early Intervention service provider for an evaluation. Chances are that this is nothing to worry about, but I would get an evaluation just to be safe. There is no cost to you, and if there is any need for speech therapy they can set you up for that free of charge also. I wouldn't wait though, because they only provide services until the age of 3.

When my son turned 2 and wasn't talking I talked to his pediatrician about it. She said he'll talk when he's ready, and that boys are usually late. I just couldn't accept that as an answer because al of my friends with boys the same age were talking. I called ALTA and had them come to my home for an evaluation. It turned out that my son had some pretty serious delays, including a speech disorder. Once he finally starting making sounds and one-syllable words, his speech pathologist diagnosed him with Childhood Apraxia of Speech. He is now 3 years 8 months, and is doing really well. He is finally speaking and starting to use sentences to communicate. It's been a long road and a lot of work, but it's been worth it to see the progress. I'm just glad that I didn't listen to his pediatrician and "just wait and see". That was the worst thing I could of done for my son.

I know that our story is not the norm, but it's a good example of why you shouldn't just give it time. If your son needs help with his speech, now is the best time to figure it out. Besides, as he gets older, his inability to communicate with start to frustrate him. Get him help now if he needs it.

Good Luck!

A. C.

My son did not talk at two. At three I called the school district to have him evaluated, since doctors still telling me there was not a problem. He was very behind in language and was enrolled in special needs pre-school. I knew there were other issues and insisted on more screening by MDs. He was diagnosed as high function autistic. He began to talk very well by the time he was four. We also used sign language at home since my daughter was born deaf. This also helped him. It is much better to get the help when they are young.

Sounds exactly like my 2 1/2 year old. He goes to speech therapy once a week through alta regional. He has a speech delay called aprexia, very common. More than likely he is fine and will talk when he wants. Usually the doctors don't worry about it til kids are 3, and that's when all the services kick in. Altal regional is for children up to 3 and is a state/federal funded program. Look into it. My son loves his speech therapy. Good luck

If you're worried ask the doctor about a speech and language referal. If he's significantly behind from a developmental perspective, you'll qualify for services. I've had friends who's kids got speech therapy at this age. It's fun for the kids and free for you. Talk to the Dr.

HTH
T.