2 Year Old Hitting, Kicking & Pulling Hair

I happen to agree with you that time-outs don't make sense when they're so little...of course others will disagree, lol!
google 'conscious discipline' and also take a wander around this page and the links from this page:
http://joanneaz_2.tripod.com/positivedisciplineresourcece...

1 mom found this helpful

I am a former preschool teacher who taught 2 years olds for over ten years. You need to remember to phrase things positively to a 2 year old. Tell them to do what you want them to do. For example, say "walk" not "don't run". All the 2 year old hears is RUN. They block out those other words. Therefore, before dropping your child off at preschool you could remind her to use gentle/soft hands or our feet are for walking. This way things stay positive and you are not always focusing on what went wrong and reminding your child about negative things. It takes time to get used to talking like this because we are not used to doing it. Hope this helps.

If I were you, I would take her out of Preschool. She would benefit from your loving guidance and with small playgroups with other close friends. She would have you close by to help her deal with her frustrations and to help guide her through her interactions without aggression. You could model bahavior through play with her. You could use puppets or read her stories that would teach how to handle anger or frustration. (Hands are for Helping - is one such book). If you want her to develop academically and that is the reason for sending her to preschool, you could be her first teacher. I think the benefits of staying with you outweigh the benefits of going to preschool at a young age.
(Below: This probably is not the case with your child although I would take notice of diet.)
It could be behavioral problems or problems with her diet. My children are very sensitive to foods with red dye 40 and some yellow dyes found in so many things we eat. Take notice when she is acting agressive. My son can not control his aggression when he eats stuff with this in it. My older son acts extra sensitive and less tollerant of others (even angry and physical). Both of my children are very good boys. Check out reddye40.org or other websites about red dye 40. We have found plenty to eat without this junk! It could be a total transformation - if this is the case. Good luck!

Hey M.,
Time outs don't work unless the child understands why like Laura said.

The other Moms will probably not agree with what I am going to say mext - but it worked for me.

You have to find out something that your child does not like. Obviously nothing hurtful or dangerous! Then when she hits etc immediately do the thing to her that she does not like. She will link the two actions and then figure it out.

The one thing my first daughter hated was for me to leave the room without saying anything(especially if we had bee playing together) and ignore her. Also I would tell her "NO" in a stern voice and mean it. Now once she understood the time out thing - oh yes it worked, my middle daughter HATED time outs - so it worked then.

I think some parents have a hard time disciplining their "first born" and wait until it is to late to start re-inforcing it. Rules exist in life so the sooner they start to get that the better for them I say.

I have 3 children only 14 and 15 months apart, so I had to keep some form of order otherwise I would have gone crazy(ier)! Now I am dealing with homework issues!! Oh for the days of hitting, biting and timeouts - LOL.

Challenges are good they help us grow.

M. F

Hi M.
I am a preschool teacher for 8 years of older ones younger 2's. What works for me is to stay calm, crouch down to their level and show them a gentle touch. Take her hand and have her gently touch the arm of the other person. If she pulls hair, have her "pet" the other persons hair that she pulled and tell her that she hurt her friend or whoever. Talking calmly and being on her eye level and being positive is more effective than a punishment. Be consistent. It's a short phase if it's handled correctly! Good luck and Merry Christmas!
L.

Hi M.- Its tough. Its normal for the age though. I think the most important thing is that your attitude be that the behavior is ABSOLUTELY NOT ACCEPTABLE. She may be learning it from another kid at school, but make sure there isnt anything going on at school making her angry. Are you certain she is cared for properly and in no harms way? If so, and the time outs don't work, start with telling her you will take away a toy everytime, starting with one she likes A LOT. Ride it out, its a control/testing boundaries thing. Good luck.