2 Month Old Babygirl Will Only Sleep on Her Belly!

Updated on April 08, 2009
J.B. asks from Cincinnati, OH
33 answers

I have a 10 week old babygirl who just refuses to sleep on her back or side. When she was a tiny newborn she did okay but as she started getting a little bigger I started giving her tummy time, which has done great. She is very stong and very controlling w/ her neck! Now because of tummy time she chooses to sleep like that. I am constantly waking up ever hour at night checking on her and she is fine. But I am getting critisized about the risk of SIDS. What should I do? She doesn't like being swaddles, and wakes up the minute I try and lay her down on either her back or side.

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So What Happened?

Thank u all so much! I really do appreciate the help and advice u women have given me. I feel much more comftorble knowing my child isn't the only one that has this issue... I will never be totally comftorble with not checking on her til she's at least 15, Lol! But, Thanks very much!! :)

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J.P.

answers from Cleveland on

First, relax a little. This is a common problem. My son refused to sleep on his back. Still doesn't like it. From the time I brought him home from the hospital he has hated sleeping on his back. Didn't like being swaddled either. Stopped swaddling him almost right away because it just pissed him off and it was harder to get him to sleep like that. And he would never stay asleep long then. Once I stopped swaddling him and just made sure he had weather appropriate pj's on to make sure he didn't get cold he started sleeping longer. As soon as he figured out how to roll he stopped sleeping on his back. That was at like 6 weeks. I tried those infant positioner pillow things and still he would figure out how to worm his way completely out of it. So I gave up and let him sleep however he was comfortable. Which alternates between his back and side. The doctor had a hissy fit when I told him that I wasn't making him sleep on his back. But something my mom said to me concerning this made a whole lot of sense to me. She told me that my sister and I both slept on our stomachs because that was what made us happy and comfortable. People were putting babies to sleep on their stomachs for YEARS before SIDS without catastrophic death rates! How did we all make it this far? Of course this was before the SIDS paranoia. I don't discount SIDS as being irrelevant or anything. It's a terrible thing that sometimes happens. But now they're also saying that SIDS attacks if they fall asleep sitting up. How are you supposed to keep your kid from falling asleep in the car, or in the baby swing or stroller? Any time a baby dies and they can't explain it, it's SIDS. I told the doctor that I check on him regularly and it's important that he get a good night sleep. If sleeping on his back keeps him from actually sleeping then it's not good for him. His crib is in my room and I can hear his little snoring at night and he wakes up happy and refreshed. I know what the doctors say but I know what's best for my son. So try to relax and do what you can to make sure your baby girl gets good sleep. Sleep is very important to their growth and health. My son just turned 1 and he's perfectly happy and healthy. He's even ahead of the curve as far as development. Learned everything a month before "the books" said he'd be doing things. They freaked when I put a pillow in his crib too. But he sleeps happier with one of Daddy's pillows to cuddle with. Don't worry so much about what the doctors think. Just be the best mom you can and do what is best for her even if it goes against the book. Good luck.

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B.B.

answers from Indianapolis on

Oh you should have HEARD the criticisms we got about letting our oldest sleep on her tummy!!!! You would have thought that was the worst thing you could ever do to a child!!

Our 5 year old absolutely would NOT go to sleep on her back. One night, we laid her on her tummy, and she slept the night through. We couldn't believe it!

Pediatrician's office seriously wagged fingers at us telling us NOT to do that. They did tell us to make sure that there wasn't anything else in the crib with her (like a blanket or stuffed animal) that might get in the way of her breathing; to make sure not to put her down on anything cushy (like a comforter or blanket), but something more like a firm mattress with a tight fitting sheet.

We had a pack-n-play - the way they're designed, they have mesh all around the bottom of the bassinet so even if she got her face up against the side (which rarely happened), she could still breath. They recommended not smoking or drinking at least until she could roll over (just to make sure our judgement wasn't impaired and wouldn't forget to check on her) - that wasn't an issue for us, neither of us smoke, and rarely drink (not prudes, just a choice).

We also checked on her ALL the time. We had the monitor turned up so loud that if she even thought about flinching, we'd hear it. Plus she slept so soundly that we could hardly hear her on the monitor - which meant we checked on her even more.

We figured surely in the history of civilization that we aren't the only ones to let our child sleep on their stomach, and more often then not, the kids all turned out okay.

Just make sure that the surface she's lying on (crib, pack-n-play, whatever) isn't too cushy - no laying her down on comforters, etc. because she might not be able to breath, nothing in the bed with her (like stuffed animals, sheets, blankets, etc.) and check on her LOTS. I remember checking our daughter every time I went to the bathroom. If I went to get something to drink, I'd check her on the way out of the room, and on the way back. My thought was: You can never check on them too much; just like you can't spoil a child that young.

For what it's worth, and good luck!

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T.J.

answers from Cleveland on

hello try useing a box fan that makes some noise the sounds will help Doctors say but I know what you are going through i never slept till my son was aout 6 months oh yeah the fan does not need to be on the baby just aim it at the wall .

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R.H.

answers from Cleveland on

I think that that whole which way to lay a baby is bull. My kids all slept on there stomachs. If they truely knew what caused SIDS it wouldn't be a problem anymore. It can still happen anyway you lay them. My grandson refused to sleep on his back so I tried laying him on his side. I always worry about there being there back. They can throw up and can't roll over so they can breath!! I was always checking on my baby all night long. Now that I have a grandson in the house I am up and down agin (he is almost a year old now), I say make the baby comfortable and check on her. THat is my oppinion.

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D.T.

answers from Muncie on

My little one preferred to be on her stomach and side too. When she's awake, lay her on her tummy and watch her. You want to see if she can lift and turn her head, you can try moving from one side of her to the other to see if she'll follow you. If she can lift and turn her head then she should be safe. If it makes you feel better, strip her bedding away, no blankets, no sheets, no plush animals.

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A.M.

answers from Dayton on

Just relax before you drive yourself crazy! My first baby would only sleep on his belly. The day we took him home from the hospital, we laid him on his belly to sleep. He slept great, too. My mom put all 3 of us kids on our bellies to sleep, and we all survived, too. Don't worry about what other people are saying about SIDS. You said your baby has great neck strength, so she will be just fine. She will be able to turn her head from side to side when she's asleep. As long as she has a firm matress, no stuffed animals, and no thick blankets in her bed, then don't worry. I know how you feel, though. I was a huge worryier with my first baby. I worried and obsessed about everything! But, in the end, he turned out fine, and so will your daughter. Hope this helps!
A. M.
www.homewithmykids.info

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A.W.

answers from Toledo on

Hi J....
I have had 7 babies with 23 years of experience. All of my babies came home and slept on their tummies. With my first 3 that is how they told you to lay them. All of a sudden it changed. I would say if that is how she sleeps best, do it!! All of mine were fine. If it makes you feel better to check on her then do it but I wouldn't be waking her up. One night you may not get her back to sleep. Not to scare you, I had a nephew that died of SIDS and he was laying on his back. So, I don't know that any one study is totally accurate.

GOOD LUCK!!

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K.P.

answers from Fort Wayne on

We have three kids. They all slept on their belly's. When you put a baby on their back they get startled and wake up crying, I think they feel like they are falling. On their sides the same thing can happen. Don't listen to anyone but your heart and what your baby likes. God Bless and congradulations on your little one. You are a good mother.

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M.S.

answers from Columbus on

My kids are 10,8 and 7. They ALL slept on their bellies. They just preferred it that way. I tried the wedges, so that they were more on their sides. I tried putting them on their backs, swaddled. I tried giving up tummy time for a while, thinking it was just confusing them. It didn't matter. My kids were all nice, big healthy babies and had great neck strength, so I eventually just stopped worrying. Like others have said, just make sure the mattress or sleeping area is firm and that your baby can lift her head up on her own. I do know that it can be stressfull, when everywhere you look, you see the "Back to sleep" slogan. Many moms I know said their kids were the same way, so there are many of us out there with belly sleepers!!

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M.B.

answers from Cleveland on

I see everyone is very supportive, but I lost a nephew to SIDS, so it's hard for me to chime in agreeing. If you have a good doc, then talk about it. Maybe your baby does have reflux. And maybe there's something more to do about that. NICU babies can sleep on their tummies because they are being monitored 24/7. I'm not saying don't but weigh the options and definitely keep everything out of the crib if you do. I'm not trying to scare you or be critical (like earlier posts suggest) and when someone doesn't ask, I don't give my opinion. But the question was posed and I know what my sister would say. They don't know what causes SIDS, and older babies (my nephew was 5.5 months old and very strong) can be victims of this. Most cases are when the baby is between 4-5 months old. In the U.S., we don't call it SIDS after 1 year, but in many other countries, they say 2 years old. The advice generally given is that once babies learn to roll over from back to tummy, they can stay on their tummies. Good luck.

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S.F.

answers from Dayton on

I certainly understand your dilemma. There was no way I was going to put my twins (my first children) on their bellies. Just couldn't do it. Then I had my daughter and she just wouldn't sleep any other way. So I put her on her belly. She took a pacifer which has been shown to reduce the risk of SIDS and recently there has also been the finding that a fan in the room also helps reduce the risk. She was able to hold her head up pretty early on so that helped and once she started rolling over I checked on her less. You have to weigh your options and make a decision that's best for you and your child and forget the critics. Best of luck.

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R.G.

answers from Cleveland on

i have 3 girls and all of them sleep on their tummys from 8 weeks on . i just got no sleep for me either way..do u have a video monitir? i did not want them only to sleep on my chest so i let them sleep n the crib on tummy and checked every hr...

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K.S.

answers from Columbus on

I too noticed that my son only liked to sleep on his belly and so that's what I did. He has slept on his belly since he was very young and has done great. Just think about all the kids 10-15 years ago who were told to sleep on their bellies...and they survived!

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L.R.

answers from Santa Barbara on

Hi J.,

I have 2 boys who are now 4 and half and 3 and half years. Neither of them slept on their backs..EVER!. I did try to have them sleep on backs but they only wanted to be on their tummies. They were both very comfortable and slept very very well. My boys were also very strong in ther necks, one from birth. In times gone by they use to say that sleeping on the belly was better, now they have changed it to the back being safer. I think it is good for you to keep checking on your baby, but I believe he will be just fine sleeping on his belly. Neither of mine ever had any complications and are healthy to this day. I am not a medical proffesional. Just sharing my experiences.

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A.P.

answers from Cleveland on

J., Iread through every response you recieved. Let me say I support you in any way your daughter chooses to sleep. I say that because I AM a SIDS mom, our daughter was the same age as yours, 10 weeks, 75 days. 3 1/2 years ago. My Sommer WAS on her back, a non smoking house, breastfed. and paci user. I truly believe that the Govt is using the sleep campaign because they dont know!!! I know more about SIDS than alot of doctors, I am not proud of that, it breaks my heart to do my research. I have 2 friends with newborns, who sleep on their stomachs, or will not sleep, and I agree with them. I do not believe tummy sleeping is a factor in SIDS. There are many theories out there, all of which make more sense than tummy sleeping. It is a Pysiological cause, and IF our ( my other 2 were back sleepers also because I believed it at the time) tummy sleepers were dying because of bedding, ect, believe me, the coroner told me himself, there would signs of suffocation. Suffocation is NOT SIDS! For your own sanity, get some sleep, check on her often, but I will tell SIDS can happen even when the baby is awake. Like I said, Ive done my research. Please dont beat yourself up any more. If I could have anouther baby, I would be ok with tummy sleeping. Even if you noticed in the first 15 seconds you probably coulnt save a baby from SIDS. I DO NOT mean to alarm you, buto help you feel better. I will keep you in prayer,

A.

PS. we started a non profit for SIDS research in our daughters name, I am blessed by the 75 days we had with her. Enjoy every second.

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S.E.

answers from Cleveland on

Is she rolling that way on her own? If so, for sure leave here that way. Get some sleep. Once babies can roll to their preferred position it is out of your control.

My little one would only sleep on his tummy. Would cry for hours until I flipped him on his tummy. Very bad reflux. At that point I talked to many doctors and they all confessed to me their kids slept on their tummys.

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E.O.

answers from Muncie on

honestly, i wouldn't freak out about it, back in the 80's when i was born, they TOLD parents to put babies on their tummies to sleep and we all turned out just fine! if sids is going to happen, there's nothing that can really be done to prevent it- that's why it's called sudden. my son is the same age as your daughter, and he sleeps in all positions- back, tummy, and both sides. he's just fine. if it makes you feel better, you can keep trying to get her to like the other positions, but i think sleeping on her tummy will be just fine. :)

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K.D.

answers from Toledo on

J.,
Maybe I am just of a different thinking, but once my daughter started controlling her neck, I didn't worry about the back sleeping thing. As long as you don't have her too warm and you look at the other things that contribute to a major cause of SIDS, don't worry about it. If people want to criticize you about it, they need to back off. She is your daughter and if she sleeps better on her tummy, then obviously that is a better option for her. Good luck!! Remember, it's called SIDS because it's sudden and they don't exactly know what causes it, they can only guess. Enjoy your little one.

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S.D.

answers from Indianapolis on

Well, it depends on other factors as well. The highest percentage of SIDS victims are formula-fed, male infants between 2 and 6 months. If there is nothing else in her bed (no blankets, no pillows, no bumpers) and you breast feed, there is VERY little chance she could be affected by SIDS. Keep her next to the bed until she learns to turn herself over and then you don't have to worry at all because they say as soon as babies can turn themselves back over they can sleep on their stomachs.
Also, if she doesn't already use a pacifier, don't believe the myth that they help and try to give her one. They helped babies that live in smoking households a small percentage of the time, but pacifier companies took that and ran telling parents that pacifiers reduce the risk of SIDS in all babies. It's just not true. Don't smoke in your house (or anywhere around the baby ever) and the chance of SIDS is less than if you use a pacifier.

You can "correct" me all you want. However, unless you read the study instead of listening to a doctor, you don't know what you are talking about. I read the study. The same went to box fans. Breastfed babies - expecially girls - rarely die of SIDS and the number is no lower when you compare paci-users to non-pacie-users. The use of a pacifier only made a difference in formula-fed babies and smoking households. Breastfed babies don't sleep as soundly because they digest the milk faster and need to be fed more often and that seems to be enough to ward off SIDS. The study specifically says that 4% of babies were using a pacifier at the time of death.
The box fan had nothing to do with breastfeds but everything to do with smoking households. The assumption is that when stagnant second-hand smokey air sits around a baby who can't turn his head, there can be too much CO2 and they can die from it. So, if you put a fan in the room, the air is constantly moving.

All that said...they have most recently begun to link true SIDS (not things like suffocation) to a brain-stem problem. So, use of a pacifier couldn't possibly have any affect on the prevention of SIDS. However, if it makes you feel safer to try to force pacifier use on a baby that doesn't want to take it (it took 3 months to get my first to use one and my second didn't want anything to do with it) and then go through weaning later (we haven't even begun this dreaded process), then by all means, try it. But the numbers aren't there to support the effort.

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A.F.

answers from Indianapolis on

Sorry if I'm repeating, but I didn't have time to read all the posts. My little guy liked sleeping on his belly but I wasn't brave enough to leave him like that unless I could supervise him. I have him sleeping swaddled in his swing or bouncy seat so he isn't flat on his back, that seems to be a good compromise for us. Good luck!

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E.M.

answers from Fort Wayne on

Hun, I had the same problem with my daughter, she slept on her tummy from 5 days old!! There was no other way she would sleep, and as a mother you have to do what is best for YOUR child, not what everyone else thinks is right. I also worried about SIDS, but as long as your daughter can move her head around when she is laying on her tummy, I wouldn't worry too much. In all honesty, most of us were put on our tummys to sleep, that's how they did it in the old days LOL - and never worried about SIDS. Your daughter needs her sleep, and that's the most important thing! You might try setting up a pack and play next to you so you can hear her if she makes any noises too, that might help you feel better. My daughter slept in the pack and play for 6 months before finally switching to a crib, and she did fine after her colic ended! Email me any time hun, I am glad to help :)

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L.L.

answers from Indianapolis on

My son was in the NICU for 2 weeks...they always put him on his belly but told me not to when i got home. Well... thanks to them putting him on his belly all the time.. he wouldn't sleep any other way....I ended up letting him sleep on his belly after watching him during nap times to be sure he moves his head...... he is 19 months and still sleep on his belly most of the time! :)

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E.B.

answers from Dayton on

Hi J. - you've pretty much already heard most everything I'm going to say from the other moms. I have two girls, 6 & 3 and after about three or four weeks, neither of mine would sleep on their back. I think it's more important for them to get a good nights sleep than to try to make sure they sleep on their back. The risk factors for SIDS seems to have more to do with other issues like whether or not someone smokes in the house (I know that not all SIDS babies have smokers, but the risk factor greatly increases if you do). Lay them so they are comfortable and make sure to check on them often. Both my girls were also ahead of schedule as far as physical ability and I think it had something to do with them sleeping on their tummies. It strengthens those neck muscles a lot faster than those who sleep on their backs and only get "tummy time" for a few minutes a day. Ultimately you have to make the decision about what's right for you and your family so that you can feel safe and sleep at night.

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J.J.

answers from Cleveland on

hi i have a 2 month year old and i think you should let her take some naps in her carseat so that she can start getting use to sleeping on her back and if that don't work than you need to lay her on a pillow on her back so that she will be comforbale and one of those things should work. well write me if you think there some good idea or not thanks

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C.G.

answers from Indianapolis on

J.-

We had this same issue, although our daughter was a bit older, yet not yet 1 year old. She also got over being swaddled real quick.
Our pediatrician at the time said however she sleeps best is the way you should let her sleep. He did say to put her on her back to sleep, and if she rolls over then let her stay there (if she can roll over on her own).

I know it's scary - I will be praying for you.

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L.G.

answers from Cleveland on

My daughter would only sleep on her tummy. The only thing that made me somewhat comfortable with it is the monitor we had...we had one that had a sensor pad that went under her mattress to detect if she stopped breathing. That was the only reason why I was able to be ok with it. Here's the link to the one we have: http://www.angelcare-monitor.com/ac-201 It was $100 and worth every penny. We no longer use the sensor portion because she's 2.5...but we still have the sound portion hooked up so we can hear her when she's in her room.

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R.W.

answers from Cleveland on

I know you are not suppose to lay them on their belly, but all 3 pf my children slept on their stomach. When my twins were born the people in the hospital would even lay them on their stomach, but tell me not to because they were connected to all types of monitors there. If you are going to lay your baby on her tummy make sure that there is nothing around her that she can put her face in, ie. no blankets, pillows, or toys ect. Good luck

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D.S.

answers from Columbus on

I actually wanted to correct Sarah's statement that pacifiers don't reduce the risk of SIDS. It is not just in smoking homes or with mothers that smoke - it is with all cases. I have been told this by many physicians and nurses, as well as researched it on my own. We were actually told by a nurse who had just attended a SIDS conference at our new baby class that there has never been a SIDS incident involving a pacifier-baby. This is why all of my kids got a pacifier immediately after birth (and I a a breastfeeding mother) - I wanted all the help I could get protecting my children from the potential of dying from SIDS.

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J.A.

answers from Cincinnati on

I understand completely. My son, too, only slept on his belly and I was also criticized by my Ped for doing so. I chose to go with my gut and my gut says he was fine. He was strong and he was sleeping, eating and growing just fine. I understand the Drs point but I figure since they change their thinking every decade on this topic, they really don't know either way. I chose to go with my gut and it turned out just fine. Trust your instincts. You know your child better than anyone.

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N.G.

answers from Columbus on

Hi J.! I have a 3 year old daughter and NEVER put her on her back. I am sure that you slept on your belly, I know that I did (I am 30)and all my brothers and sisters. SIDS is very scary. It could happen on their backs to.I understand your concern. My pediatrician did not like that I let her sleep on her stomach. If she is comfy let her go.
I am due to have another baby in June and I plan to let him sleep on his stomach to. Follow your instincts! N. G.

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R.D.

answers from Indianapolis on

I understand your dilemna. With my older kids, it was on their tummy to sleep was the advice. My oldest was more comfy on her back, and I worried about her spitting up and choking. she didn't. I agree, make the decision that makes you the most comfortable. If you do decide to place her on her tummy, make sure there are no extra blankets in the bed, no bumper pads, and no pads under her. You don't want any linen in the bed with her that would have the chance to get bunched up in front of her face or over her head. If you must cover her up, tuck the cover in over the blanket so it is under her arm pits. Better yet, use one of those sleep sacks that is blanket weight.
Good luck.
R.

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M.H.

answers from Columbus on

We had to do the samething with our son who is now 8 months old. At first would check frequently then as time went became less frequent. Only way anyone in house could sleep. He still sleeps on belly but turns self over as wants too now. I got the samething about SIDS, but decided baby needed sleep too.

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D.R.

answers from Fort Wayne on

There is some evidence that toxins in mattresses may be a factor(such as formaldyhde)--I would use only organic mattress and sheets, only unscented detergent and no fabric softeners. The chemicals in artifical perfume are very toxic. Even if it is not a cause of SIDS these toxins are not good for anyone especially small babies. i agree with most of the moms here--the medical community really does not know what causes SIDS. My 3 girls and 3 grand kids all slept on their tummies. I know moms here have different opinions about co-sleeping but I have read that babies follow your breathing pattern when they are close by --which may protect them.

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