2 1/2 Year Old Saying Naughty Words

Call me old fashioned, but a nice liquid soap always worked for me as a kid. I've only used it once on my son when he was sassy (I did give him warnings first) and he's never sassed again. He also informed his little sister about how nasty it was and just a couple of warnings worked for her. :-) I will say that 2 1/2 may be a little young for it to be effective (my son was almost 4) so I'd first try suggesting the "silly" words as an alternative. Good luck!

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I agree with others who have said to ignore it as much as possible. Once thing you might do to augment that (so that he understands what it is you're ignoring) is to say "mommy can't hear you when you use those words."

You might check with his teachers to see how they handle the other child in his classroom. I'm guessing they freak out a bit, and that's why your child is testing those words with you at home. He's learned there's something different about what he hears coming from the mouth of that kid.

Good luck! I think the less emphasis you put on it, the sooner it will disappear.

My boy is now 3yo and I understand the desire to correct. But it seems like you've tried everything except ignoring it. I had an incident where my son starting swearing, out of the blue, at a friends house of all places. I was in a situation where I had to correct it but occasionally there are instances when these things are best left alone.

My daughter said a few naughty words when she was that age too. It started with "shut up" and I would put her in time-out for it. Unfortunately she said it all the time and I was constantly putting her in time-out, which apparently did not do anything to stop the behavior. So then when she pulled out the "f" word, after trying to contain my shock and horror, I figured I'd try something different this time. I tried to not give any reaction (which was EXTREMELY difficult)and although she still used it occasionally I think she eventually kind of forgot about that word. Thank goodness!! She's now 3 1/2 and never says it. Good luck!

I agree with the others that at this point he's probably doing it to see your reaction. It's a phase and it will pass. It will probably pass more quickly if he no longer gets a reaction from you or if you just say, "Those words aren't o.k. in our family." You can then give him better words. However, as soon as he forgets about these words he will learn new ones. My boys are 9 and 13 and they were constantly learning new vocabulary I didn't approve of. As they got older I would take a nickel out of their allowance every time they said an "inappropriate" word. That adds up fast when you only get a couple of dollars a week! One thing I learned from ECFE or parenting books is to not call them "bad words." That has connotations that can be appealing to some kids and it's not always a correct description. We always call them "inappropriate words" or if they are truly swear words then we call them swear words. Things get really interesting once they start riding the school bus with older kids! That's where my kids have learned most of their inappropriate words and swear words.

He is most likely continuing to say these because he is getting a reaction from you. Try teaching him silly alternatives to "oh my goodness". My son loves to say "oh pickle juice" (he came up with that on his own after hearing someone say oh pickles). My nephew likes to say "oh tarter sauce" (from sponge bob). They get a reaction from people but it because they are cute & funny instead of shocking.

I agree with ignoring. It's the hardest thing to do for you, and his saying it will probably increase before it starts to decrease. but if you can continue to ignore it should get better.

I realize this may sound a little cruel but it worked when my son was that age. We put soap on our fingers & put it in his mouth saying "if you choose to use naughty words then the consequence is cleaning your mouth with soap". I felt terrible but the memory of it is enough to keep him from saying it again. Good luck!

Have you tried ignoring? If a 2 year old finds something that REALLY gets your attention he/she will continue to do it. You can still do time out...say "that is a naughty word", then put him in time out for 2 min. Nothing else should be said during this time...no crying, yelling, taking toys away or explaining. THAT IS WHAT HE WANTS! Also make sure you are finding time away from school and homework to give him mommy time he may be jealous that he does not get you 100% of the time anymore.

With both my children when the neighbor child taught them not so nice words I was so upset . What I did was ignore what they said and put in my own better word . I would say did you just say darn it or did you just say please be quiet . They would stop and think what did I say . The other since they are close in age 16 months usally would tell the word the other said and I would just ignore that too . Ater a while it did get better . They are now 10 soon to be 11 and 9 and they still like to give me the shock once in a while and I still correct them with a better word . You will always come in contact with children with potty mouths because not every parent watches what they say around children . And they are just people who do not think before they say things . Good luck

Since he's 2 1/2 and can't understand what the words truly mean, I would ignore them. An older child (4? and up) would definitely know that those were bad words and would chose to use them. What your son knows is that those words bother mommy and get a LOT of attention--he doesn't understand the malicious connotation of those words (ie, "shut up" is no different than "please be quiet"). When my kids have said bad words, I typically give a raised eyebrow, ask them to rephrase their request (which is common in our house--my 5 yo likes to demand rather than politely request...) and move on. If your child is not that fluid in his vocabulary, saying "We don't say that. It's not nice." and moving on might work too.

Since you have already tried so many forms of discipline, how about ignoring the swearing. I know, it sounds counter-intuitive.

My grandma had a saying, "Behavior that gets attention, gets repeated."

Good luck. I know from personal experience this is harder than it seems! But it worked for us!

Hi C.,

Kids will definately hear words that shouldn't be used, or are inappropriate, and you can't shelter them from life but you can teach them like you are doing. Great job. The only thing, I wouldn't fake cry because he could turn that against you and use that as a technique for manipulating you in the future. Just as he's learning these words from kids at daycare he'll learn even more from what you do. Especially at a daycare setting, your child will learn words and behaviors and temperments at a young age.

Good luck with that one.
L.

C.,

We dealt with this when my oldest daughter started preschool. Mostly she was horribly sassy because that's how the other preschool kids treated their mothers. I wouldn't switch schools either because these kids are everywhere; you won't find a school without a bad example of some kind. That's just life.

After calmly and repeatedly telling her all the things you described, nothing worked for me, either. So I warned her once that if she said bad things, I would have to clean out her mouth and she wouldn't like it. Then she tested me. So I took a toothbrush and dipped it quickly in Listerine and I brushed her tongue off. That got her attention. I had to do it several times before she stopped and every few months or so we would have to bring it back for a reminder. But it worked and word got around so I never had to even try it with my younger 3 kids. They just listen to their big sister when she says "don't say bad words." And, no, Listerine dipped on a toothbrush won't physically hurt or traumatize your children.

Good luck,
S.

My daughter hasn't learned too many naughty words yet . . . but it's only a matter of time since there are tons of naughty words on the radio today. It doesn't help that OMG is on T-shirts these days. Giving this behavior too much attention has always backfired for us. She knew it was wrong when we just looked at her and looked disappointed. All you can really do is model the right behavior that you want to see. We have done the whole time-out thing with our dtr whenever we see poor behavior. I guess we see more issues with whining so we tend to excuse our dtr and walk her to her bedroom. We tell her when she's ready to show positive behavior she is welcome to come out of her room. She usually comes out 5 minutes later (after crying) and she attempts to change her attitude. My dtr is almost 6 and attends a Christian day school. We try to tell her that she shouldn't use God's name in the wrong way, her behavior is not very ladylike, or what do you think Jesus would want you to do??? It helps at times. Good Luck!

Have him take a bite out of a wrag soaked in vinager or use a dropper and put a couple of drops on his tounge. This also worked for me with talking back or being sassy.

at this age it's best just to ingore him!! when he gets older than you can explain to him that certain aren't for children to use!!

When one of my children, whom is 7, saids naughty words I give him a little soy sauce on his tongue. He hates the taste since it is real bitter and he stops talking like that. I do this in my kitchen because he does spit it out since it tastes real bad. He does not use those words anymore and he knows if he does he will get soy sauce in his mouth. Works wonderful and does not harm them in any way!

VINEGAR! A little finger of it on the tongue or sometimes 1/4 tsp will do amazing wonders! After asking for the same advice someone suggested vinegar and it is the ONLY thing that would get our 30 mo twins from saying shut-up or from being sassy. We leave the bottle out on the counter as a visual reminder that we reference every now and then. Recently our friends were going through a similar issue with their 3 year old son and they used vinegar and were shocked at how well it worked for them as well. Their little boy would start saying his naughty words and he would see the vinegar out and immediately stop. Good Luck!!