2 1/2 Year Old About to Be a "BIG SISTER"

Updated on March 17, 2008
H. asks from Tulsa, OK
18 answers

My little angel is about to be a big sister. I know that baby brother is going to get a lot of the attention over the next few weeks. Any ideas to help ease the transition? Did your new siblings give the older siblings a gift and vis-a-versa? What did they give? I've heard of having a big sister party when the new sibling comes home... any other ideas?

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C.E.

answers from Abilene on

When my oldest was almost 2 1/2 years old he became a big brother. I bought a small gift for both boys (my oldest & my newborn) to exchange in the hospital. Good Luck!!!

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C.M.

answers from Abilene on

My son was 3 when my daughter was born. I looked on eBay, and typed in "I'm the big brother shirt", and got tons of results. You can personalize them with the child's name. It was Brooke's "gift" to Alex for being her big brother. We wrapped it and everything, so when he came in to meet her, we handed it to him saying she had gotten him a gift. He LOVED it and wore it proudly.

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J.F.

answers from Dallas on

the best advice i got when my 2 1/2 yr became big brother last year was this: babies are quick to wrap their little fingers around someone's finger, so whenever I could get the kids next to each other, I would encourage my little boy to touch the baby's hand. In turn the baby would squeeze his finger and I would say, "look, the baby is saying I love you. that's how babies give hugs, kisses, and say "i love you." That always got a smile from the older one. we did the gift thing too. the baby gave big bro. a thomas train and big bro gave the baby a blanket just like his own Binky. also, when the baby cries make a point to say, "just a minute (baby's name), I'm holding (older sibling) right now." this let him know that i wouldn't go running to baby and that he was still very important. I was very worried about my sensitive big bro, but all is fine and they are great together, 10 mo later:)

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J.J.

answers from Dallas on

My son is 27 months old and we just had his baby sister two weeks ago. We didn't really do anything special. We have been reading him big brother books and obviously try to spend a lot of time and attention with him. But of course his special time has decreased. So far he isn't bothered. We have been talking to him a lot about the baby. In fact, the first day my parents brought him to the hospital to see me (had a c-section so we were there 4 days), he said "Hi Mommy, Hi Daddy, Hi Lucky Baby." Her name is Lexi, so it comes out as "Lucky" when he says her name. He just accepted her as part of the family. Going on 2 weeks now and he always says Hi to her and even tries to share his toys. I only pray it continues. So don't feel like you have to do something big. Just continue to make her feel loved, which I am sure you will.

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M.H.

answers from Dallas on

H.,

My son was 2 yrs and 4 months when our daughter was born. We found that reading to our son (Baby on the Way and I'm A Big Brother Now) got him very excited about the baby. It also helped him understand what to expect (ie crying, nursing, etc). We also had the luxury of birthing at home and bringing him in to meet his sister when she was just minutes old - so we were never seperated as a family. Honestly, he is so sweet to our daughter and has not exhibited any signs of jealousy yet. It's amazing.
Also, I think at this age they can start 'helping'. For instance, my son loves to hand me wipes when I change a diaper or hold a bottle (with assistance) when I feed her. It helps him to feel important and that he is caring for his sister.
When I do have to speak to him about being gentle or not waking the baby, I remember to tell him that when he was a lil baby we were very gentle with him, or that we spoke softly as to not wake him when he was sleeping, etc. Cognitively, at this age - they actually can start to get this.
Good luck!!!
M.

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C.J.

answers from Dallas on

My daughter was 16 months old when her brother was born. We bought her a kitchen and had it set up when we came home from the hospital. It truly helped keep her busy when I was busy with the baby. I had a c-section so I had help for three weeks and that made it easier as well. Someone was alway around to play with her. Once I was left at home by myself she required much more attention. My doctor told me that the baby was going to be fine as long as he was feed, changed and comfortable make sure to spend as much quality time with my daughter. It took a couple of weeks of adjusting, but she soon became a very good helper. I would have her help out by getting diapers, wipes, and burp clothes. She loved to help the only real problem we had was when I was breastfeeding they always seem to know when you are busy and can get into everything. This will be a h*** o* her so have lots of patients :).

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R.

answers from Dallas on

I now have 3 children and one thing that we did was put a sign on our door(both at the Hospital and at home) that says please speak to Big Sisters H. and A. before asking about our new brother. The girls loved that because they felt special like these people were coming to see them and then they could show off their new baby brother. And of course like other posters we let thme bring diapers, wipes etc. also I let them touch him-I didn't constantly say "watch the baby, careful, careful etc." I also let them make noise-he wasnt born into a quiet house so why should we change that now that he's here. We did have a white noise machine in his room so that when he was asleep in his crib it drowned out any outside noise. HTH and God bless you each on this new endeavor.

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D.D.

answers from Dallas on

My older two kids are 34 months apart and have always been super close (even now that they are 10 and 7). When my son was born he had a gift for his big sister when she came to see him in the hospital, and she had one for him also that she helped pick out. The best advice I can give you is to incorporate her as much as possible in taking care of him so it's the mentality of both of you taking care of the baby. Also, when I nursed the baby was hers and my special time for her to sit with me and we'd read books or talk or whatever. And of course, make sure you spend special one on one time with her when he's sleeping. Congratulaions! I can say without a doubt that the best gift I have ever given my daughter was her little brother.

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K.S.

answers from Dallas on

My son was 22 months when his sister was born. His Aunt took him shopping the day she was bor to buy her a gift, he picked out puprle flowers and a balloon. I also made sure that he visited the hospital and was able to climb into my lap while I was holding her. I also breastfed her, and if I was feeding her and he wanted to sit with me, I let him. I did not want him to think that she was taking over. Now that she is 11 months, they love each other. He has never been jelous of her, so far. The only issue we have has is her wanting to play with his toys and him getting mad at her. I think that the most important thing is making sure you daughters routine and especially time with you does not change. My two shared a room from the time she was 8 weeks old until this week, I think this helped too. I have also made sure that he was included in everything, and let him hold her (sitting on the couch or floor with me not far away) when he wanted to. You might also go to Babies R Us and get her a shirt that says "I'm the big sister". I hope this helps.

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J.H.

answers from Amarillo on

Different things work with children, but some get a doll and let the child (feed) the doll while you feed, etc. and others think it is real exciting to be a helper and go get diapers for you etc. But when you walk in the door with the new born, let your husband carry the baby and you go hug your daughter and hold her a bit, like you missed her. I made the mistake of carrying little newborn brother in to show my two year old and she burst into tears, because she had missed me, and I had my hands full. She turned into a helper and loved her brother right away, but I felt bad for the first introduction, as I wasn't even thinking .

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L.M.

answers from Dallas on

I knew that I was going to have a c-section so that meant that I was going to be in the hospital for 4 days.....so I wrapped a gift (not expensive---crayons & paper, etc.)so that my 2.5 year old could unwrap every day when she came to visit me. It was something she looked forward to and it made her more of a part of the celebration. (btw-I wrapped them and brought them to the hospital when I checked in so I had them ready) congrats!!

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B.I.

answers from Tyler on

When my three year old became a big sis in September, we stocked up on books about what a special job it is to be a big sister and how much of a help she could be. Her birthday is in September also, so pretty much it was her birthday all month long because I was afraid she would feel left out with all the attention being on lil brother. We also got her excited and involved in bringing the baby home by slowly having her help in decorating the nursery and talking about what it was going to be like with a little baby. Once we all four got home, my husband, parents and in-laws really helped to make sure that she got the attention she was used to, so I believe now, five months later, she is a well adjusted big sister that loves her brother very much!

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R.M.

answers from Amarillo on

My oldest was 6 1/2 when he became a big brother. Though he was SO proud, he was a little jealous. He acted out a little at school and cried at night when he went to bed, cause the baby was still up, he thought he should be able to, as well. We had to let him know that he was as important as the new baby, and we made sure he had his own time with mommy and daddy after the baby came. Little brother was born in Oct, so we took big brother trick-or-treating by ourselves, he LOVED it! Be sure to give her lots of positive reinforcement, but don't let her make you feel guilty that you are taking care of the baby. Set limits, but make sure she gets her time too. Good luck! I'm sure it will go great!

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J.W.

answers from Dallas on

Try giving her a new baby doll at the hospital. That way she has her very own new baby to bring home and take care of, just like mommy.The transition from 1 to 2 is difficult at first but it's twice the fun!God bless.

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M.B.

answers from Abilene on

We have a 7 month baby boy of which he has a 3 yr old sister and 5 & 7 year old brothers. I was so worried as you are when I had my 2nd child. Believe it or not...kids are so adaptive you will be amazed in how your daughter reacts. She might hold back at first but just keep her involved and she'll love her new baby brother. I thought that having the older sister was even better....they love helping with diaper changes, baths and getting things to help you with the baby. I just let my older kids feel as if the new baby was theirs and they felt so important and involved. I also made sure I had a little one on one time with each of them during the day...even if it was just reading a book or sitting and talking for a little while. I didn't do anything other than that and let me tell you....my daughter can get my 7 month old to do more than I can...she's great!! Good Luck.

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C.H.

answers from Dallas on

Your kids are almost exactly the same ages apart as mine!

When my son was born, we got my daughter a baby boy doll to take care of. She named it the same name as our son, which I thought was cute.

It seemed, though, that my daughter's issue was more with not getting attention from visitors rather than from me or my husband. When people would come over, she would get a little rambunctious and would sometimes hit and just be rather rough. We made sure that visitors gave her undivided attention to help ease that. But, we didn't back down from discipline. In the end, all that lasted about two weeks.

One piece of advice I read and followed was to talk to the baby about his big sister and say things (within ear shot of big sis) like, "You're so lucky to have a big sister that loves you so much." And, when you put the baby down for a nap, say something like, "Okay, it's big sister's turn to play with Mommy now." That way, she thinks the focus is on her and not the baby.

Also, I made sure to let my daughter help with the baby when she asked to. And, I always had my daughter hug and kiss her brother goodnight. It seemed to help foster love between them.

Good luck, and congrats on your impending arrival!

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H.H.

answers from Dallas on

H.--

What a special time, but also a very big adjustment for all. I was lucky enough to have a sweet son (2 1/2 at the time) who adored babies, so when his little sister arrived he wanted to be right in the middle of it! I did have a little gift from baby to him and from him to baby. He really liked that since he was into Thomas the Train at the time. We did ready "Big Brother" books to try to prepare him for her arrival. He also loved wearing his "Big Brother" shirt. I had thought about the big brother party too, but never got around to doing it. Sounds like a fun idea if your little girl is into cakes, gifts, party, etc.

Once home, I did notice a bit of behavioral issues from my son bu it was all for "attention" reasons. As hard as it was, when the baby was asleep I gave him ALL the attention and then when he napped I bonded with the baby. This was the hardest part for me b/c I wanted to just hold the baby ALL day long like I did my first born. But that just isn't possible when you have 2 kiddos.

Something else that really helped my son was including him--ask him to get diapers, talk to baby, etc. When baby smiled, we'd say "look sister loves you, etc."

Best of luck.

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C.J.

answers from Amarillo on

My pediatrition said that until the baby is 4 months old, his whole world is about the moma, so the daddy's job was to give 100% of his attention to my oldest. It was a huge success. Even though there were times of feelings being hurt because my oldest did not understand why mommy was so busy, my husband was an excellent distraction until things calmed down a bit.

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