17 Month Old Transitioning to 1 nap.Not Going So Well- Afternoons Are Miserable!

It doesn't sound like he is ready for 1 nap. Also usually kids drop their morning nap and keep their afternoon one. I remember having to move lunch up to like 11:00am and then put my kids down by about 12. We did that schedule for 2 days and then moved it back by 15 minutes each day until we achieved the right nap time. Now we still eat by 1130/1145 but they nap around 1:00/1:30 til 3:30. Schedule changes are hard and you just have to be semi flexible (earlier bedtime etc) until they get adjusted. Go by your child's cues. If he is starting to act tired, put him down.

Good luck!

J.,

Inspite of what your friends kids have done, your kiddo might not be ready. At that age, my son starting resisting nap, but I still maintained at least an 30 minutes of quiet time during his regular nap time.

The best thing to do is follow your son's cues. Is he tired at 9:30am still? If he's exhibiting signs of being tired then stick with the two naps. It's really not a big deal, and there are a lot of kids who don't transition to one nap. My new friends little boy who is just now two has not transitioned to one nap. There is no set guideline or timeframe for that kind of stuff. If it's making for a cranky and unhappy kiddo in the evening, then it's not time.

My son made the transition when he was put into daycare for a few months, and it was smooth and no big deal. There was no fighting, no fussy and it was just time for him.

If you think this is the time, then create a consistent pre-nap routine that works just like your bedtime routine. Quiet time, read a book or listen to music and this will cue your son to when it's time for sleep. If you create the pattern he'll follow those cues as he gets older and gets used to it. Funny thing is just the other night, I forgot to turn on my son's bedtime music and he reminded me!

Honestly, go with your gut. Follow those Mommy instincts and let it guide you through this one. They are the best resources you have.

At 17 months old, you do NOT "have to" transition him to 1 nap. This is NOT a "rule." At this age, many still do benefit with 2 naps, and need it. Do not just make an "absolute" only 1 nap a day routine. Some days he will still need 2 naps. And personally, I still think he does need 2 naps. He is not responding well, to not napping.

There is NO "formula" to this. Each child is different. You need to go according to YOUR child, and his "cues."
In other words, each day will NOT be the same nap "schedule."

For example: my son is now 2.5 years old. From the time he was 6 months old, he has taken 2 naps a day, and still does at his current age. BUT, there are days that he will not nap in the morning. But, I still go through our pre-nap routine, and I wind him down, and I put him in his crib. He KNOWS the routine like auto-pilot by now. Then he usually amuses himself in his crib for a time for about 15-20 minutes, then he falls asleep, and naps for 2 hours. BUT, if he does not end up falling asleep, then I take him out. But I wait, for about 1/2 hour.... and if he's not sleeping by then, I take him out. THEN, in the afternoon... after I pick up my daughter from school (for me I have to time his naps according to my daughter's school schedule and pick up times)... then he takes his nap at about 3:00, and he naps for about 2 hours minimum.
But the thing is... I KNOW when he is tired, and I KNOW his sleepy cues... and I ALWAYS put him to nap, REGULARLY.
If he does not nap, he is NOT happy and it affects his whole demeanor for the entire day.

I did for a time, "experiment" and omitted his morning nap and then went to toddler groups at that time. BUT, he did not do well and would be tired, and got clingy and he would tell me he wanted to go home. So, taking away his morning nap, for him, did not work out well.
So, my son still takes 2 naps a day, about 80% of the time.

But, this is my son. Each child is different. Some kids do fine with just 1 nap a day, consolidated. On weekends, I sometimes just put him down for 1 nap (because I don't have to worry about timing his naps per my daughter's school schedule and pick up times), and so on weekends I will put him to nap anywhere from about 11:00-1:00... and he will nap for about 2-3 hours.

At night, no matter how many naps he took, and no matter what time he took his nap or for how long... he still goes to bed at night at about 8:00-8:30. And he does fine with this "schedule" we have.

But, my son is very regular, and at about every 3-4 hours or so, he gets tired. But this is for HIS age, right now.

For me, I keep VERY regular and consistent about his naps. I am always home when it is his nap time. I don't force him to nap... but I KNOW his patterns and tired cues. Each day is different...so you have to be flexible about it.

For you, your son STILL seems to need 2 naps. To me. He still gets tired. But, his "resistance" right now, is probably due to his changing development, and also when they are hitting milestones, they sleep ability gets tweaked. Its a phase. So, keep this in mind. No matter what "phase" my son went through, I flowed with it. BUT, I KNEW when he was tired and when he would not nap, or would. AND I knew that after the irregular phases, he would go back to his normal nap patterns. And he did.

Your son is barely making it by 12:00 without a nap. So this is an obvious cue to you, that making him skip a morning nap is not good. He NEEDS it.
And OFTEN, when a child is "over-tired" and too tired, it actually makes it HARDER for them to fall asleep, and harder for them to sleep well and have a quality sleep. So, making him "tired" on purpose for so long... could actually back-fire. As you see...and it is interfering with his "ability" to sleep/nap.
And then, by 3:30-4:00 he is miserable and as you said, your afternoons are miserable, and it is because he is just TOO over-tired and TOO bent out of shape by then.

Before any nap, you need to have a "wind-down" time. For me, it takes my kids about 1/2 hour to wind them down first, BEFORE they actually go to nap and I put them down. And, if you keep them "stimulated" all the way up until nap "time"...they will NOT be able to unwind before nap.

All the best,
Susan

Just went through the transition with my 14 month old so I have some ideas. By the way, my "sign" from my son that he was ready to move to one nap was also that he was resisting the afternoon nap. Everyone says it's the morning nap that goes, but for us it wasn't either! First off, it's normal for them to be very tired for a few weeks when dropping a nap. It takes time to get used to the new schedule and reset their body clock to sleeping at different times. And, I think eventually his nap will lengthen. To make your little guy more comfortable, you can try alternating one/two nap days. For example, my son did two days in a row with one nap and then was really tired the next day, so we did two for two days. Then we went back to one. We did this for a couple of weeks and then he was ready to go to one for good. Also, I have noticed that my son does way better with his longest awake stretch in the am, as opposed to the afternoon. He wakes at 7 and naps at 1, usually for two hours and is down for the night at 7:30 (so he's awake 6 hours in the am, 4 1/2 in the afternoon). For awhile, he was going down at noon and up at 2 which meant he was really tired around 6. When I put him to bed early, he just got up earlier. So, you could try getting him to take his nap a little later and see if that works and helps make the late afternoon/early evening more comfortable. I accomplished this by keeping him up 15 or 30 minutes longer every few days until he got used to it. So you could do 12:15 for a few days, 12:30 for a few, and so on, you get the idea. You could also try an earlier bedtime to help him catch up on sleep. Give a few things a shot and give it a few weeks. Your little guy will tell you if he is ready to make the switch or not.