15 Month Still Breastfeeding

Just stop. It's actually as easy at it sounds. If you have decided that you are finished (which you also decided back in November) then you need to close-up shop and offer him only milk, water and table foods.

You don't need anyone to watch him, so I don't know why you would see that as a barrier. Put out a straw cup of milk along with his breakfast, then again with lunch, snack and dinner.

This is about your ability to stay consistent and say "no" to your son. He will scream, cry, tantrum and probably go on a "hunger strike" for a day or so, but as my pediatrician told me... he won't starve himself. When he realizes that he's hungry and you aren't going to give-in, he will eat. When he realizes that he is thirsty and you aren't going to give in, he will drink.

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When my little guy was 15-months I wanted to stop nursing as well. Except, I was too nervous, and felt too bad to actually make the commitment to stop. 3 months later, when he was 18-months, I couldn't take it anymore. I was a human pacifier! So, I made a promise to myself not to give in. I told him it was "all gone." At night, I had to just ignore the cries, this was the hardest part. But, what was so rediculous about my situation, was the fact that it took 2 nights for him to be completely over nursing. I felt silly for not taking it head on 3 months prior.

My little guy still does not drink milk, or any other substitution. I did start giving him a cup of juice every morning, and he LOVES that!

Best of luck, and stay strong. It will all work out.

K.

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Band aids on your nipples and tell him you're "broken"?

***ADDED*** Please feel free to ignore posters trying to GUILT you into continueing! I hear you--you're DONE and that's OK. I agree with getting him more interested in solids. Not all of us want to BF til age 4!

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I am with Krista. This is about you being able to say no and mean no. You will have a few days and nights that are really tough but you are making it tougher by saying no and then giving in. He has learned that if he cries enough, he will get what he wants.

He is not going to die if he has a few hours of not eating. Offer him milk in a sippy cup everytime he wants to drink. Even with breastfeeding, he needed to be started on solids way before this. Keep offering it and make him a part of your dining times.

There are no easy tricks here. But, if you stand firm on this, you will have an easier time on other things that you will need to stand firm on later because he will know that you do as you say and you say as you do.

Good luck!

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Why does it hurt? Was he not taught nursing manners? Why do you feel sick to your stomach? Because you know it will hurt?

Breastfeeding should never hurt. He may need to continue nursing simply even more so because you are a single Mother and he needs that one on one closeness with you to feel connected.

With his ques showing you, his Mother, how much he still needs this emotionally - I would try to solve the issues that are causing you stress. Teach him nursing manners... main one being "Wait", another is "After you eat lunch/dinner/etc", "Not so hard - or - No biting" are important ones too.

If it makes you feel better - I was a single Mom for the first 2.5 years and worked full time and went to school part time. My daughter weaned herself at 4 years. The more you resent and dislike doing this for your son without fixing the underlying reasons - the worse off it will be for both.

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He doesn't want solids? He's not eating solid food? You'd better talk to your pediatrician to find out how to get him to eat.

Try warming the milk and putting it in a cup. Sometimes babies don't want cool or cold milk because they're used to body temp milk.

You're never going to have an easy time getting him off the breast if you don't teach him to eat. He might want to feed himself if he doesn't like baby food. Try all kinds of things. Look up what one year olds eat and try one new food at a time. Don't give him desserts - try veggies, meats and fruits. Decrease the fruits if he won't take meat or veggies. Give the fruit last so that he won't boycott the others because fruit is sweet tasting.

Are you cutting the juice with water before you try to give it him? Straight juice might be too strong for him.

Again, if you can't get him on food, consult your doctor, and soon.
Good luck,
D.

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Please don't let anyone try to pressure you into continuing something you no longer want to do. Breastfeeding needs to end when one of the parties (mom or baby) is ready for it to end.

I wonder if part of the reason you are having trouble doing this is because you feel like you are being mean to your son. You are not. He is old enough to eat table food, and it is ok for breast milk to not be a part of his diet. Very often it is difficult to say no to our kids, because we do love them so much and want them to be happy. However, we do need to say no. He will be much better off with a simple no, rather than a long drawn out no and you changing your mind and going back and forth. Kids really can deal with no, as long as it comes with love.

I was really stressed when I finally forced myself to wean my son off the bottle. I was so worried and thougth I was in for a very difficult weekend, as he was used to falling asleep with a bottle. He was fine. Went right to sleep in my arms. Turns out, he needed the suggle more than the bottle.

Good luck! You can do it!

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I love the Bandaid idea. LOL!
If you don't want to breastfeed anymore, then don't. It's your body and he is old enough to have a sippy cup. Tell him firmly no more and maybe even say OW to let him know it hurts. If he cries, don't give in. It's time to wean him anyway. He is a big boy now.

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Does he understand no? If so, tell him no, tell him your boobs no longer work. Put bandaids over your nipples so he can see they are not working, and than offer him milk. It may take a couple of days, but he will get over it.

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I know a lot of moms who extended-nurse come to a time when they are ready to quit before baby is and you've gotten some good suggestions about stopping. (And some not-so-good, but of course, you can decide for yourself which you are comfortable with!) I just wanted to throw one more thing out there... Any chance you're pregnant? The reactions you describe sound a lot like pregnancy symptoms! :)

--E.
www.sabirthclasses.com

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have you tried lots of sippy cups? lots of finger foods? My son was a little resistant to cups and then using a spoon. I gave him something especially yummy(a smoothie in a cup, yogurt with a spoon and) touched the food to his lips and walked away. I worked on the other side of the kitchen with my back to him. He took it and within a day was eating and drinking almost everything. Sometimes kids push for independence and sometimes they are wanting to stay little.

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You will probably have to stop nursing first, then substitute. Once he knows he can no longer have mommy, he will have no choice but to take other foods/liquids. Talk to his pediatrician, too, for ideas.

As for the comment about it shouldn't hurt to breastfeed, once my twins had their teeth, it did hurt at times to nurse. We stopped at 15 months and they were fine.

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Sounds like you need to go cold turkey. I know there are ways to do it gently, but I do not know specifics.

Good Luck! Mine nursed until 22 and 23 months and it was hard to wean them!

Wear long shirts and keep covered. The less access he has the better.

I did the do not offer/do not refuse method. I still allowed him to nurse but I no longer offered it at the times I thought he needed to nurse. This really helped him drop feedings. I also allowed him to self feed frequently throughout the day and offered him sips of water throughout the day in a regular open cup. The more practice he had feeding himself and drinking with an open cup the less of a chance for him wanting to nurse. I kept us both occupied and we often went out of the house so we could both have a change of scenery.

I think night/nap were the last feedings to go and they were the hardest for him to let go of. I gradually dropped one and then the last.

Weaning is a process. All I can say is take it one day at a time. He will eventually wean.

Good Luck to you!

Here are some great websites for more tips for weaning:
http://www.kellymom.com/
http://askdrsears.com/
http://www.llli.org/