K.J. asks from Murphysboro, IL on April 30, 2008
13 Month Old Is Not Saying Words
My 13 month old son had been say what we understood to be a few words: da, ma, and galla (for the dog - Galahad). He seems to understand what we are saying, but lately he's stopped saying ma and galla and seems to be testing us when we tell him no. The doctor said on monday that he may be a little behind in language skills but physically he is doing well. Any suggestions? How do you teach a toddler to speak? We are trying not to worry.
So What Happened?™
Thank you all so much for the advice. I really appreciate all the encouragement. I think the best advice has been that boys learn later and that if they are working on a new skill they may stop or go backward in another. After thinking about it and watching him, we realize that he's been working really hard at understanding the relationship between things. He's been stacking blocks and putting smaller items in larger containers. He loves being responsible for carrying a small container of cheerios. He doesn't spill them that often either. We worked on some of the words he was already saying to get him to say them again and there was no problem with him saying them. He is very physical and loves to run and jump and climbs on anything he can. He's very smart, and I think his hearing is fine. He's only been sick twice in 13 months, even with a minor cold. We'll just keep talking to him and wait on him to tell us when it's time for him to talk. Thanks again everybody!
Featured Answers
S.M. answers from St. Louis on May 02, 2008
Hi,
You may have heard that boys often are slower in picking up vocabulary...my nephew didn't say a word until about two and a half, and then started speaking in sentences! When they are ready, they will talk.
Good luck
D.M. answers from St. Louis on May 01, 2008
Don't worry about anything yet it is way too early. When my son was 18 months old and we went to the doctor, the doctor asked if he could speak 50 words 25, then 10? I looked at him like he was crazy -- I didn't think my son was behind, and I freaked and counted the words he could kind of say -- it was around 15. The doctor said that was fine and that it is common for boys to be a little slower than girls and first born boys he said are often even slower to start talking. Well, to make a long story short, shortly after that my son started picking up words right and left and I could no longer keep track. He is now in 2nd grade and gets straight A's. I didn't do anything special or change anything I was doing, he just started later and has no problems at all.
J.W. answers from Lawrence on May 01, 2008
My daughter is 19 mos. and she is still not saying much, just in the past month she has begun saying more. I was worried at first, but when I think about it, I am home with her all day so she doesn't need to talk, I know what she wants so I think she probably sees that she doesn't need to speak because mommy will do it anyway. She understands EVERYTHING and is very very smart, she just doesn't want to use words yet. Sometimes too, kids stop something they have learned because they are working on mastering another skill, then once that has happened, they will go back to doing what they had before.
More Answers
S.M. answers from St. Louis on May 02, 2008
Hi,
You may have heard that boys often are slower in picking up vocabulary...my nephew didn't say a word until about two and a half, and then started speaking in sentences! When they are ready, they will talk.
Good luck
L.C. answers from St. Louis on May 02, 2008
Hi K., my son was the same way. He had what they called a speech delay. He went to Cardinal Glennon and saw a speech pathologist to help with with his verbal skills. Check with your doctor on this. I know we had to get his eyes and hearing checked too to make sure that he was ok. Don't worry about it too much. He'll catch up, sometime they just move alittle slower than other kids do. Now my son is 12 and you would never know he had any issues. (He did well even back in 1st grade.) Good Luck and if you need a name of someone let me know. I can look and see who he saw back then.
K.O. answers from Wichita on May 01, 2008
See a specialist immediately. Speech pathologists are free if you seek early childhood intervention (must be provided by law). Also, early childhood screening can help determine if the delays are developmental, cognitive, or other in nature. They also can help rule out autism, etc. The earlier the intervention, the better the results. My son had similar symptoms around one year of age and he is now a four year old with a large vocabulary! Thanks to speech pathology and early intervention services, he will be in a regular education kindergarten class. Good luck. Kati
J.W. answers from Lawrence on May 01, 2008
My daughter is 19 mos. and she is still not saying much, just in the past month she has begun saying more. I was worried at first, but when I think about it, I am home with her all day so she doesn't need to talk, I know what she wants so I think she probably sees that she doesn't need to speak because mommy will do it anyway. She understands EVERYTHING and is very very smart, she just doesn't want to use words yet. Sometimes too, kids stop something they have learned because they are working on mastering another skill, then once that has happened, they will go back to doing what they had before.
P.H. answers from Wichita on May 03, 2008
Interesting.
I had one nephew that never talked until he was almost 18 months old and when he did it was in entire intelligible sentences. So, one never knows.
Babies do understand so much more than they are able to communicate verbally. There was a study that came out in the late 80's about how hearing children of deaf parents could communicate at ages as early 9 months old with sign language. I told my niece about this and purchased her a book "Sign with your Baby" by Joseph Garcia, and a Baby Einstine DVD about baby sign language.
She has reported great success and much less crankiness at dinnertime when her 12 month old can sign what she wants.
J.H. answers from St. Louis on May 01, 2008
I would take him to an ear nose and throat doctor and get his ears checked out. If there is a problem its usually with ears. My daughter Sher has had tubes two times and also tonsils and adenoids removed. Also we were able to get free speech therapy thru a program in our town(not an income based program- just one that the gov. pays for)Alos, Its not about whether or not he has the right amount of word... my daughter threw terrible fits because she could not communicate to us what she needed. Now she talks great and althought she still has ear trouble, she is able to speak very well because of the therapy. Hope it helps. J.
C.G. answers from Columbia on May 01, 2008
Many 13 month olds do not have many words yet. He should have a few by this age, but most kids don't really start talking until closer to about 2. There is a wide range of what's considered normal. I would let the doctor know if he previously had lots of words, and is now regressing. Since he had just a few, he may just be not saying them as often. Also, kids understand language long before they can actually speak.
To help develop his language skills:
--speak clearly when you talk to him so he can understand each word. Studies show that the more adults talk with their children, the better their language skills tend to be (of course, there are other things that factor in as well).
--Try to require him to use his words when he wants something. Instead of giving him more to eat without asking, teach him how to say "more." Once he learns how, try to encourage him to say it before you give him more. (It's ok if he can't, but practicing before you give it to him will help).
--Whenever he is playing with something or points to something, label it--if he hands you a ball, say "Ball, you have a ball!"
-- Reading lots of books can also help.
Is he using gestures like pointing, or showing or giving you things like toys? Is he communicating with you in other ways besides speaking? These are all ways that toddlers communicate. So that he doesn't get frustrated, try to make sure his ways of communicating are effective, but still encourage him to use words by labeling things and talking to him a lot, asking questions. You might also want to look into baby sign language. This can help kids communicate and become less frustrated when they don't have the words to use. But, if you do use signs, make sure YOU SAY THE WORD with the sign, so he can learn to say the word as well. Basically, you want to make sure he doesn't replace spoken words with signs.
I wouldn't stress about it too much. He's still young. But if your concerns persist, be persistent with his doctor to get this checked out.
As far as him testing you, now is the time to start being consistent. Make sure your yes means yes and your no means no. This will make things much easier for you in the future if you establish this now. Children need limits to help them feel safe. If you think about how overwhelming and stimulating all these new things in the world can be to toddlers, giving him limits can help him manage everything and make his world seem less overwhelming. Giving him choices can help with this stage. "Do you want an apple or banana with your lunch?" This can give him some limited control over his world.
Best wishes! C.
E.M. answers from Lawrence on May 01, 2008
I have had a coupe of friends with boys who experienced this same thing. With one of them, her son didn't talk until he was 3, and then just started speaking in full sentences. At 13 months though, you don't need to worry. Boys tend to talk after they get the movement down. Girls tend to do the opposite. My girls didn't walk until 16 months, but they were early talkers. We also did baby signs with them, to help develope their communication skills, so I think that helped them with speaking. Try doing some signs. "More" (finger to palm) and "help me" (patting chest) were some of the ones we used the most. And of course the animal signs.
Don't worry, it'll happen.
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