12 Year Old Daughter Wanting to Wear Makeup

Times, they are a changin'!! I have custody of my 15 year old niece and I let her start when she was 13. I let her start with colored lipgloss and natural eye shadow color and mascara that was clear and then mascara that matched her eyelash color. We made a day of it. We went to the mall and let the beauty girls do a natural makeup look (nordstroms at the MAC counter). They were really great and I bought the lipgloss there and then we went to Walgreens to get the rest(much cheaper). It seemed young to me, but I wanted to make sure she wasn't sneaking to do it. I also wanted to control the colors and how much she put on - who knows what her friends would have given her to wear :)
I just think it's better to control it, that way she knows she can come to you about anyting - especially once you get to the boyfriend stuff. I hope this helps.

2 moms found this helpful

I was desperate for makeup at 12...and my parents did not allow it. Back in the 80's, I'd sneak frosted blue eyeshadow (up to my eyebrows, no less) pink blush and red lipstick. I shudder just thinking about it. How different would things have been if my mother had been by my side and helped me with these things? Probably a lot different. And not so scary :D

She's 12. She is learning to be a lady. This is the time, in my opinion, where you make or break your trust with her in her teenage years. You either become helpful and a trusted advisor, or you become the enemy. I'd take this time to enjoy showing her how to become the woman you want her to be....and allow these things in moderation with proper teaching of how to do it. Just because she wears makeup does not mean she's dating, having "boyfriends" etc. etc. And as long as she has the school work good and has a good head on her shoulders, go with it.

Good luck!

A.

1 mom found this helpful

I allowed my daughter total freedom with makeup after we went to a friend of mine who sold Mary Kay and I let her show my daughter how to apply it so it looked natural (and not like a clown and mom is not the expert). by giving her total freedom and not acting like it was a big deal, at that age, she sort of could take it or leave it. She is 15 almost 16 now, and wears makeup everyday, but does a beautiful job with it. I would find a trusted person to teach her how to do it - kind of takes you out of the center ring, know what i mean?

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My daughter is also in 6th grade. I have been to school several times and I would say the makeup wearing is about fifty-fifty. My daughter isn't into it yet (she's still all about soccer shorts and ponytails) but I know it's coming, and I think it's okay.

hello N., how are you? my youngest sister started wearing her makeup when she was 12 also. now she is 22. our mom didnt know what to do with her. because i didnt care for and still dont. how about just light mascara and how about light eyeshade? i dont think you are "UNREASONABLE". if your daughter is good in school and take care of things you ask. then i think, mom we have to change a little. my mother had. she fought for tooth and nail. but my sister wore the makeup and got her belly ring, nose ring, tattoo, before she turned 18. but she was good in shcool. and kept her grads good. i have 15teen months old daughter and i am freaking out with all the stuff in our society going on. good luck

I don't believe you are being too harsh, I know where my girls went to school until the middle school age (7th where we are)they were not allowed to wear makeup to school. Now if you are willing to allow her to wear a more natural look like a light foundation nothing chunky and cakey like a light mineral powder with a light blusher maybe some natural palettes for eyes soft items, middle school is harsh on a teenage girl, maybe a clear or sheer light gloss nothing flashy and work with her on how its best worn. You don't want her going to school and allowing her friends to put some Gezibelle makeup on her!!!

I was 13 when I started to wear makeup so to know that 20 years later girls want to wear it at 12 seems much more realistic than I would expect. I don't think you are unreasonable to ask her not to wear it, though, either. Sounds like you've gotten lots of good advice - a compromise of light lip gloss and neutral toned eyeshadow and mascara but not the whole enchilada seems like a good plan. Best of luck to you! Congrats on having a wonderful daughter who is willing to talk to you about it!

I don't see the problem if she starts with a pale eyeshadow and a really light brown mascara. With your help she will be sure to apply it properly and not do it behind your back at school and end up looking horrible. I personally don't think 6th graders should be going to school w 8th graders, it just makes them grow up too fast. But that's the way the school works, and unfortunately, our kids are going to want to do what the bigger kids at school are doing.

Hi, N.. If your daughter is very responsible and listens to you, you are doing well in my book! I would give her the chance to wear make-up, as long as she doesn't leave the house looking like a raccoon. You could even give her a few tricks, showing her how to apply it for her eye shape and showing her how less is more when it comes to makeup. If she abuses the privilege, then she has to wait for the time you decide she can try again. I do think it is great that you talk openly about boys and what makes a person special. The fact that it is what is inside and not outside is such an important thing for girls to learn, and we get no outside help with this from society, that is for sure! Good Luck!

My daughter is in 6th grade, but won't turn 12 until April. Most of her friends are already turning 12 and starting to wear make-up. My daughter is a beautiful girl, but I have let her start wearing a little bit of eye-shadow-pale pinks which look very natural. She also likes a little bit of color on her lips, which is also a natural color. She asked me the other day if she could try eyeliner, but I'm going to have to say no to that. I think she's too young and I don't want her to look too grown up. Maybe in a few years. She has girls in her class with boyfriends, but so far my daughter hasn't been too interested in having one herself. I discourage and certainly don't encourage that either. Luckily for me, our Elementary School includes 6th grade, and Middle School starts until 7th grade. It must be harder for you, since your daughter is already in Middle School and there are 7th and 8th girls as influences who are probably wearing make-up too. My son is in 8th grade and he changed so much when starting Middle School last year, it's a whole other world. I wish you luck with your daughter, she sounds like a good girl, so it shouldn't be a problem letting her start out with eyeshadow as long it's not too much.
Take care,
V.