12 & 13 Year Olds in a Hotel Room Without Adult Supervision in the Room

Already have. My son went to a state track meet and the kids stayed in rooms together, 4 to a room, no adults in the room. There were adult chaperones (I went but didn't chaperone) on each floor. There were no problems, other than that some of the boys brought xboxes and they stayed up half the night playing. They didn't do to well at the meet, lol. Same son (7th grade) is going on a 5 day trip with his school in May, I'm excited about it.

If it's a school sponsored trip, they've already thought of everything. They probably tape doors (like someone said) and they may even sleep in shifts and walk the hallways. Taking other peoples' kids on an overnight trip is a HUGE responsibility...one, I would hope, teachers and schools do not take lightly.

I grew up in FL and the 5th graders to go DC for a safety patrol trip. I went in '88 and my nieces went in '12 and '15. Parents are not allowed to go and kids are put 4 to a room. They've been doing this for almost 30 years.

I recall going to such an event when I was in Jr. High. 8th grade, as I recall. Me and 3 girl friends stayed in a room. The chaperone's put tape outside our doors when it was time to be in our rooms for the night. Clearly, if you left your room it would be obvious since you can not retape from the inside. Whether they actually did this I don't know, as I was too scared to find out. Your parents would be called, and if there was a boys room who was also untaped it would be obvious what happened. I believe the chaperones also took shifts to walk the halls through the night to see who was untaped.

Is your school doing something like this? If not, you may want to suggest it.

We thought we were so cool because there was some free time at meal time and we decided instead of the food they had provided, we went across the street for the much better White Castle. That disgusting burger eaten with my friends and my money of our own free will was a meal I remember.

We stayed up way too late and had a great time. I remember thinking we were so grown up and independent. I remember one girl had the new Dirty Dancing cassette to listen to on her Walkman and she shared it with us on the bus ride!

If your child is one who will break the rules with no regard to the consequences, then maybe they can not be trusted for such a trip.

This is how every overnight school field trip my son (12yr old) has been on worked (and he has been on many), and it was how it worked when I was a kid. It would be impossible to have an adult in every room. The cost would skyrocket with all the additional hotel rooms that would be needed and there would need to be a whole other bus for the chaperones (if they could find that many chaperones)! I think many parents would have more issues having strange adults sleeping with their kids. The kids have to check in with chaperones at certain times, they have to check in if leaving the hotel to go shopping or to restaurants and check back in. and nobody is permitted to leave their room after lights out. We haven't had a problem.

ETA: I've never heard of "taping" them into their rooms, but then again the trips they go on are pretty busy (ie skiing for 8 hours followed by swimming for 2 hours), and they are too tired to want to go sneaking around after lights out!

My son is going on tour for a week out of province this spring and I am really excited for him. I do trust him though.

ETA: I just asked my son and he says they do tape the doors.

One thing I'd like to add is that people really underestimate the educators who chaperone these middle school trips. The people who spend all day with your kids at school know the dynamics of the kids and exactly who they need to watch most closely, who seems to like who, who would want to sneak out to see who... people seem to forget that part. As an educator in grades 7/8, we are VERY clued in to what is up among the students. So it is not a bunch of clueless bozos saying "g'night kiddos!" and tucking into their rooms for the night leaving the young'uns to their own devices...

I have never heard of taping the doors, that is genius. I remember staying in our own little tent cabins in 8th grade in Yosemite and it would have been pretty easy to arrange a rendeszvous in the middle of the night, and just be "on your way to the bathroom" if anyone got caught. But everyone was so wiped out from activities we crashed. I think that is the usual for school trips.

When my children were in school, they went on a number of trips, both school trips (band trips in High School), and church trips throughout middle and high school.

The way it was handled with the band trips at motels was that at a certain time (curfew was known well in advance), the chaperones made sure the correct students were in their correct rooms, and then put tape across the outside of the door. Students were not allowed out of their rooms after a certain time.

The doors were checked early in the morning. If any doors had tape that was torn or disturbed, those students were at risk of being sent back at their parent's expense. I think they also had the adults work as hall monitors throughout the night.

For church trips, my kids went on the church-sponsored ski trips throughout youth group. The kids knew well in advance that the bedrooms were NOT supposed to have both boys and girls in them... as our youth leader said, 'We have pink rooms, and blue rooms....we do NOT have purple rooms.' That seemed to work fine with our church.

Yes, it would be best if you could have a adult in each room, but that really isn't feasible..... I doubt you could get enough adults to volunteer to help on a trip like that.

Anyway, yes I would let my children go on a trip like that. I had good trust in my children, in both middle school and in high school.

My daughter is going on such a trip with other 8th graders. The teachers told us that they put tape across the door after the kids have retired to their room at the time the teachers have set. The teachers will know if any of the rooms were opened during the night.

We are fine with our daughter going and she is sharing a room with girls that we like and trust.

Speak to the teachers with your concerns.

Yep, just like the other moms said. We went o many trips through school, out of town. 7th grade through 12th. We attended Spanish club conventions (PASF) in San Antonio and also were expected to meet up at the Convention Center at certain times for meetings,workshops and programs. , then free for lunch and meet back at the center for afternoon gatherings.. then we were free for dinner and meet back at the hotel by a certain time. Rooms were checked, doors taped and in the mornings we would meet for a morning meeting, then start all over again.

Cheerleading camps, choir trips, band competitions..

You know your children best. If they tend to follow directions, have common sense and can handle their behaviors in public, then you can decide if they can attend.

Honestly never had a problem.

Yes. Typically that means there is a curfew and the kids are taped in or otherwise accounted for. If you think your child is not trustworthy enough to follow those protocols, don't send him/her. I went on several field trips like that in middle and HS and there was never an issue. On several trips, we were run ragged in activities til late, and then by the time we got to our rooms, we crashed quickly.

My SS went on a few overnights with his football or wrestling teams with a similar setup, and went on a 3 or 4 day band trip. SD did not travel with her school.

Any trip my oldest DD has been on, they have done the same as previous posters have stated with the tape across the door. Chaperones are not permitted to stay in the same room as students unless they are all related. This rule is not just our school's rule. My DD is going to a national convention for her business class and it is stated in the handbook that students and advisors are not permitted to stay in the same room. So unless you want to go on the trip and stay in the room with only your child, there is no way to have an adult in the room.

Of course. All three of my kids went on a school sponsored trip to DC in 7th grade. They stayed in a hotel room 3 nights with their chosen roommates only, a chaperone/teacher down the hall without event. In all the years the district has been going, there has never been an incident.

Also, for many out of town sporting events, they roomed with teammates, at a younger age then that, also without incident.

:)

I work in a school and have chaperoned overnight field trips. Ours are typically the way you mentioned with 3-4 kids to a room. Ours are usually set-up through a tour company & the tour company provides additional chaperones (in addition to those from the school.) The tour company chaperones are positioned on each floor and monitor the hallways through the night & also handle taping the outside door of each room.

The school personnel & a few parents provide all the adult supervision during the day hours of the field trip while the tour company chaperones assume responsibility for the night-time hallways. You might want to check with your school to see if it's a similar set-up.

ETA: The students are all warned that school personnel are always the ones "in charge" and if there are any problems at all, the tour company reps. will be contacting the school personnel.

my kids did several camps and trips where they stayed in rooms with other kids, and no adults directly in the room. they had a blast, and it was fine. but my kids were generally good kids, and the trips i sent 'em on were well-planned and had a degree of oversight with which i was happy.
and i was happy for my kids to have some degree of freedom, and to hang out with their friends without a stern adult eye on 'em at all times. this does not seem to be the case today.
in your situation it seems fine on the surface. i'd need to know a bit more about it if this were me IRL, such as how well we knew the roommates, and what the schedule looked like.
but i wouldn't rule it out simply because there's not an adult sleeping in the same room.
khairete
S.

I helped chaperone a field trip for a group of middle schoolers. Each room had an adult sleeping in each room. We were a small group of 45 including chaperones. Ib would ask the teacher (s) organizing the trip specific questions and decide llbased on their answers and the maturity of your child.

For the trip for which I volunteered, I was a bit anxious so I volunteered. My experience on that trip relieved my anxiety. Because I saw the concern and planning involved I would let my daughter go without me. I suggest that by talking with the lead planner you will have an ideasier of how trustworthy the teacher and the plan is. A positive for me was knowing the school and staff thru the times I was at the school on other occasionsm

When it daughter was in high school she was often in a hotel room with the cheer squad. No adult was in the room with them.

They were expected to have good behavior because that reflected the school ( and parents). The rooms were always in 1 area and the coaches were nearby.

If someone went wild or got out if hand with enjoying this freedom, they lost the privilege to cheer.

I let my daughter go on one to Washington and NY in 8th grade. It was great. They had security in the hallways all night. They were with the teachers all day. I'm so glad that she got the opportunity to go!

I went on a lot of school overnight trips and the tape on the door was used every time. However, on one trip, we had to get an additional room last minute and three of us girls ended up in that room. The room had a door on the inside to the next room...of boys. So the outside doors got taped, but the chaperones weren't aware of the inside door. We opened it up and hung out since we knew the guys next door. Nothing happened, but the possibility was there.

I was a chaperone on trips like this with my daughter's middle school. We did split the girls and boys on different floors. We had two moms responsible for several rooms and we were right in the middle of the ones we supervised. We also had teachers there who knew what kids might be trouble and what to look out for. We didn't go to bed early though. We made sure they were in their rooms. And we listened for trouble and did spot checks on the ones the teachers were concerned about. We never had a problem.

Depends on the kids, the chaperones, and the length of the trip and what the schedule looks like.

I went on an overnight field trip with my daughter last year, for the very reason you are concerned about. There would be girls in a room with no chaperone. Turns out, they would have been fine, but I didn't know that beforehand. It was a very small group, 2 boys, 2 girls, and the adult teacher/chaperone. The boys had a room across the hall from the teacher (who had his own room), the girls were the room 2 down from the teacher (so no adjoining wall). The teacher put an indicator outside the boys' room so he would know if they exited their room after hours. They were out late (it was a band trip and they had 8 hours or practice time on day 1, split into 3 time periods, 2 early, one late one after dinner). When we returned to the hotel, everyone was tired, and was expected up and ready to go early in the morning for the early morning rehearsals. My daughter's roomate was a very mature and responsible young lady. One of the kids that you see leading everything.. President of Jr. Beta, this club, that club, fall sport, winter sport, spring sport, top scores on tests, most volunteer hours, etc.

Daughter is very much like this other young lady. They would have been just fine.

But, it was a very small group. A large group would make things more complicated. 4 kids to a room could be fine... if the kids are responsible kids. No one ever has to go anywhere alone, and no one would be able to do anything that someone else didn't know about. But, if they were all "in on it"...

no and no..a hotel room full of un or under supervised pre teen kids is a recipe for disaster..especially if there are going to be any boy under the age of 90 around..either go with your daughter to chaperone, or simply say, sorry, but..no..unless you want to risk your kid coming home with a "surprise" or vd..K. h.

No, I would not allow this. Kids that have freedom this young might make bad choices and they could be hurt.

I'd rather encourage the planning committee to select sleeping quarters in a place where they had cabins that held larger groups and then an adult and a group of girls or a group of boys could be in one building.