Well at least you have an excuse..(lol)..your daughter is going thru "changes" mine is not and you explain what is going on in my household. I am at my wits end with my 10 year old and do not even know why she acts up. She is a great helper when it comes to needing her but then she is exremely mean to her 3 year old sister and almost 2 year old brother...could it be jealousy from not getting all the attention? I tried to take once a week out just for her and she always wanted to take her friends, I was not for that, it was mom/daugther time. So that didn't work. I seem to be grounding her for months and months, literally one day she can be so hateful she ends up getting grounded for over a month...that didn't work as well either so now we have a chart for her, things needs to be done, attitude, ect...if she does good after everything is done she can go play... Maybe it could be her friends she hangs out with? I don't really know I just wanted to post and say I am going thru pretty much the same thing and hope you find any answers that may help.