11 Month Old Baby Stays up Until 2-3 Am

Hi S.,

I agree mostly with Love...She’s not getting enough sleep. The instinct is to keep them up so they are tired, however this only makes it worse and the opposite happens.

About two hours after waking in the morning she will be already for a nice hour long morning nap. Naps should be no less than three hours apart, so about 3-4 hours after waking from that nap a second one should follow. At first she will not want to sleep and may cry but you need to be firm and tell her it is nap time and lay her back down and leave the room. Try to read her to know when these nap times should be...when she gets quiet or starts to yawn. My first daughter on the other hand would get hyper and all of a sudden have an abundance of energy, like if she were to stop she would pass out…much like me when I was young. If you put her down at the perfect window she should go down easy. Make sure it is a quiet place and that you tell her over and over what you are doing…nigh-nigh time, or nappy time…what ever you usually do.

Night time routine is very important too, as babies live for repetition and enjoy knowing what to expect. Dinner feeding, playtime, bath, snack (either last nursing, or a bowl of baby cereal) then bed, as close to the same time every night as you can. She’s going to need to cry a bit thought too till she gets use to it also. At night you can put a couple of quiet toys in her crib that she can feel and shake in the dark but try not to take her out of her room. If you leave her sleeping area she will think it is time to wake up and be very upset when you try and put her back in her room. If you need to go in do it quietly and don’t turn on lights. Talk softly to her and remind her everyone is asleep and she needs to be too. Try to lay her back down with out picking her up. These may all be things you strive to work toward after a couple of night of sitting and rocking her or walking her for hours, but it will happen.

Find a schedule that works best for you and try to stick to it. Best of luck and sweet dreams.

~J

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A book that saved me - "Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child" by Weisbluth.
One of the biggest messages in the book is sleep begets sleep. (ie: the more tired your baby is, the less she will sleep - harder to fall asleep and harder to stay asleep). Start with a good nap schedule and then the nighttime sleep will follow. I have a 16 month old and her bedtime has been 6:30pm for the past few months. She takes a 2-3 hour nap around 1:00pm.

The book is really great, I still re-read it when she starts throwing me for a loop!

Good Luck!!

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Hi S.,
It sounds like your daughter isn't getting enough sleep. She should be taking a nap at around 9am and 1pm for at least 1 hour. Her bedtime should be early like 6pm. If a child doesn't get enough sleep they are unable to sleep. Think about how you feel when you are over tired, you "hit the wall" so to speak. Try making sure she is in a dark, quiet place for her naps and bedtime. I HIGHLY recommend "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy child" by Dr. Weissbluth for getting your daughter on a healthy sleep schedule. Email me if you would like more info. I have used the books suggestions since my daughter was born and she is a great sleeper!
L.

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As far as I'm concerned, the best thing in the world to help with sleeping is the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Mark Weissbluth. It can help with sleep training children of any age -- I've used it with both of my kids and recommend it to everyone I know. Good luck.

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I agree Happy Baby Healthy Sleep Habits saved me. I almost lost it when I was jet lagged and up for 8 hours straight trying everything to soothe him. Basically they learn how to soothe themselves. It saved me and it is well worth looking into. He is sooo well rested now and we're all doing so much better because of it.

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It may be that your daughter is overtired- the BEST book I read about sleeping is called "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child." It completely changed the way I thought about sleep and gave great practical suggestions. The biggest lesson I learned though was that sleep begets more sleep. In other words, keeping them up does NOT make them sleep easier- in fact in makes it more difficult. I would HIGHLy recommend getting that book because good sleep habits are SO important -especially when they are little and growing...GOOD LUCK!!

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Hi S.,
Sleep begets sleep. Try not to get her over overstimulated or over fed. Get a routine for her every night. Does a bath relax her? Look at your stress and your life style and try to tone it down, too. You need to create as peaceful a environment as possible to help her settle down.

The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night (Paperback)
by Elizabeth Pantley (Author), William Sears (Author)

Good Luck! Some babies just need less sleep, but these suggestions should help her to settle down and sleep as much as she can.
Sincerely,
L.

I wouldn't try keeping your baby up for long hours. Lack of sleep can make it even more difficult to get to sleep later due to being overtired! Try to get a routine started and just stick with that for awhile even if it doesn't seem to be working. Also try relaxing yourself along with her, babies pick up stress pretty easily from those around. If she's eating solid foods to make sure there isn't a lot of sugar, or pay attention to dyes that are put into foods and additives.. some kids have very big reactions to those and many people look over that.

J.

My youngest son was exactly the same way. My pediatrician told me that some babies just don't need a lot of sleep. That is fine but...mommy does!

These sometimes helped so maybe if you haven't already done so here are some suggestions.

1. Keep the child very quiet right before you want to put her to bed. The more relaxed they are the better. Playing right before sleeping doesn't wear them out it gets their blood pumping and makes them more awake.

2. Give her a nice warm bath before bed. They have some of this nighttime bath soap that helps relax them so you can hopefully get them to sleep.

3. Dim lighting in the area around where they are relaxing.

Pretty much the more relaxed and quiet you can keep her before bedtime the better.

One last thing. Use your own judgment about sleep aids. Too many kids nowadays get hooked on these things because of parents doing this. Patience is the BEST medicine! My son grew out of his sleep problem naturally at about 18 months.

I found with my 11 mo. old son that if he takes good naps through the day (two 1-2 hour naps) then he sleeps better at night. He usually gets up at 7ish, takes his first nap 11:30-12ish, a second nap 5ish and then goes to bed around 8:30pm. You may want to try doing quiet activities after dinner to settle her down, try a warm bath before bedtime, read books, sing softly to her. Also, if you haven't tried already, let her "cry it out". The CIO is hard to listen to but she needs to get ample sleep. (as do you too). Good luck. I hope this helps.

I also agree your girl is not getting enough sleep. My question is, if she's falling asleep at 2-3am, when is she waking up?? And since she's on this absurd schedule, then how do you start fixing it?

It takes a while to get through Weissbluth's book, but it's pretty good for info on sleep cycles and patterns. Bed time IS important, but your child is still an individual. "normal" does not mean 100% of everybody, but about 95% of the population, which means 1 in 20 have a different pattern!

Anywho, to start adjusting the schedule, I would wake her up at a reasonable hour, like 7am. She will be cranky and MAD because she is sleep deprived, but you have to reset somehow. Do a morning routine and get her down for a nap whenever she feels tired, probably around 8:30-9am, since she's only had a few hours of sleep. Adjust from there. You could try the gradual approach, but it might be easier to just enforce a routine. Good naps will help her have better nighttime sleep.

And this will always be changing! Hang in there!

Dear S., my name is A. Bofinger.If nothing else helped please caal me ###-###-####.

Try the pick up/put down method. You have to be strong. Put her in her crib and soothe. If she starts to cry, pick her up and comfort with gentle rubbing on the back- no talking- just soothing, then when she is calm, put her back down. You can do this 30-40 times the first night-- which can seem like forever. BUT the 2nd night-- you'll only have to do that half the time. The 3rd night would be less than half of the 2nd night. Pick up/put down workinged for us. The first few days were the hardest. Obviously, you want to make sure that you meet all her needs first, ie. feeding, changing, etc. I got the idea from Tracy Hogg's "Baby Whisperer". Good luck! BTW, mother of 2-- one boy is 2.5 years and the other is 11 months.

This is serious!!! My son used to do that and the pediatrician suggested giving him Dimetapp because it would make him drowsy, however please don't until you check with him/her. It worked for us but the formula has changed so I don't know how it will work now.

It sounds like she is over-tired. My daughter used to be the same way and we thought she was just hyper and full of energy. When really she was overly-tired! She'd get a second boost of energy and would do anything to avoid going to bed. So we started a routine every night. We wanted her to go to bed by 8:30pm, so we started our bedtime routine at 7:30pm. Bath, change into PJ's, story time, then it's lights out. And when she's laying there, sometimes she'll be chatting away and still trying to get up but I give her a back masssage and it works like magic! She starts to calm down and before we know it, she's asleep. Which means we're getting more sleep too!

Good luck!

I too co-sleep and go to bed with my daughter as another poster said. In fact I also have had nights where I just lay there and do not let her get out of bed (or stand in the bed). She cries and screams at times, but actually the crying and screaming is just an antic to not fall asleep, cause once that starts she is asleep within minutes. Now she doesnt try too much to get out of bed and might only cry for a minute. She is just very active and for some reason often times does not want to go to sleep at night (naps have always been pretty easy for us.)

I dont think the time your child goes to sleep is a big issue, I think it is the amount of sleep she gets. And infant need at least 10 hours plus two naps of one hour or more. She may want to only take one nap a day, but that usually doesnt start until after one. My daughter is transitioning to one nap and 14 1/2 months.

Hi S.,

You don't mention whether your little girl is happy until 2-3 in the morning or whether she shows signs of being tired. My suggestion would be that she is over-tired and then cannot wind down rather than not being tired at all. I know this is going to sound like an absurd suggestion, but instead of keeping her up all day I would try putting her down for a nap during the day. I know this is easier said than done and you may have to take her out in her stroller or in the car to get her to sleep during the day at first, but I think it's an important first step. The other thing I would suggest is a consistent bedtime routine at the same time every night like - bath, story, milk, bed or something like that. Babies love predicatble routines and if she knows bed comes after her milk or story (or whatever works for you) then she may be more likely to go there. I would suggest reading The Complete Sleep Guide for Contented Babies and Toddlers by Gina Ford. She is sensible (if sometimes a bit strict) but I guarantee you that your baby will sleep better if you follow her advice. Good luck.

Sometimes a child gets very hyper when they are actually "over-tired". I would just try to implement a schedule and a little ritual you both like before you lay her in her crib. With my two girls this has worked so maybe worth a try. Basically 5 hours after your child wakes up in the morning go for a nap (2 hours goal) after nap figure another 5-6hrs and then bedtime. When the child wakes up, have breakfast and then be involved with the child til lunch time. Eat lunch, prepare a bottle and take her to her room. Dim the lights, turn on some music, talk about sleeping and put baby in comfie clothes and fresh diaper. (maybe look at a book) Let the baby take her bottle and relax and breath deeply with your baby (teaching them to unwind and relax) When she's done with her milk and you're ready, carefully lay her down (maybe with a favorite stuffed animal)cover with blanket and LEAVE the room quickly. Typically they go to sleep in 5-10 mins. If she cries as long as 10 mins. go in once, say it's nap time in a relaxed , reassuring manner and leave again. (dont pick up) even if theyre crying hysterically. I've never had to go back in after another 5-10 min. cry. Then when the baby is done with nap, offer a snack and play etc. and then after dinner, try a bath and then the same routine above. Just keep doing the same thing at the same time (roughly) and it starts working. The child developes a pattern of sleeping when she's supposed to. At that age she should be able to go all night. If she wakes up in the middle of the night, allow a little crying (5 min.) and if longer than that, I'd go in. Maybe offer a little bottle, rocking, music (soft , slow) and lay her down again. Always the same little routine.(deep breathing) My little one now starts yawning as soon as we enter her room with a bottle and the music starts. Good luck. (But remember, even when they are running around, they could be ready to sleep, just look at the clock and start putting her to bed at 8pm and hopefully you'll get where (oH it's a HE isnt it!) sorry, he's in bed by asleep by 8:30! I"m not one to schedule well, but the effort on the sleeping pattern/routine for the kids has been one that makes life pleasant in my household! I think there bodies adjust and start expecting to sleep! Good luck. L.

Hi! I won't repeat what everyone else has said about sleep patterns, but I can add some advice as you try to institute a new schedule. Rather than using pharmaceutical sleep aids, here's an old folk remedy that works wonders. Cut the ends off and peel an onion (any color except red), wrap it in aluminum foil, and bake it for a couple of hours at a low temp - you basically just want it completely soft. About 1/2 tsp of the juice that results will work amazingly well as an all-natural sleep aid, and is perfectly safe for an infant. It will be sweet from the baking, so they don't even mind the taste! This might help her get to sleep for those naps you're about to start trying. Be aware though, if you do this frequently or give them too much it might cause gas, fyi.

Between 10 and 12 months my son went from taking 3 naps a day to taking one. It was a really hard adjustment for all of us because it did throw off all our sleeping patterns.
I agree that routine is absolutely necessary. It takes a while to get into the groove but it is worth it for you and your child. Other posters have given great suggestions. I just wanted to say it is worth it. It took us some time but now I can lay my son (who is now 2) down at his nap time and he goes to sleep without fussing. However if I miss his nap time by even a couple hours it is a struggle to get him down later. We have a great bed time routine and it all adds up to easy bedtime.
We still have those weeks where he's growing or we've had guests and our schedule is upset. It usually takes us a full week to get it back together. I go in hug him without picking him up (he stands in his crib) and then I lay him back down. I do this over and over until I want to cry. But with in a week we are usually back to normal. Good luck and keep at it, it's worth it.
P.S. Please don't put cereal in her bottle at night, even the bottle is really bad for her teeth. I have a friend who is living in Costa Rica and they encouraged the cereal in the bottle--it wreaked havoc on her sons teeth. (She found out later that the bottle and the cereal were the cause.)

My daughter was a tough one to get to bed, but here's what we did. First off, routine is key! Set a bedtime and just decide that is what it is going to be every night. Then do specific things to get ready for bed, in the same order, every night. This could be a bath, putting on pjs, reading and then brushing teeth, whatever. Then, the hard part; let them cry it out. When trying to establish a bedtime children are resistant, but if you put your daughter in the crib, shut off the lights and say "good-night" and then let her cry, she will eventually go to sleep on her own. You can let them cry for up to 30 minutes and then go in, calm her down, and let her cry again. This takes time, but when they get the routine and become used to it, it will be so much easier for you. Good Luck!

Hi S.,
I agree with many of the other moms that sleep begets more sleep. It sounds counterintuitive, but it is very true. A good, consistent nap schedule, and a bedtime routine is key. Check out www.sleepsense.org. Dana Obleman is an infant/child sleep specialist who has LOTS of wonderful information on her website. It has saved our life and our sanity with our daughter. I recommend it to anyone I know who is going to have a baby. There is an e-book that you can pay for online and download to get immediate information. She recommends daily nap/sleep schedules for babies and children of all various ages. It was a godsend to us. Hope you find it helpful, too.

routine routine routine! do the exact same thing every night (starting maybe at 8?) - bath, read, bottle, whatever it is, do that routine every night. She will then start to associate that with going to sleep and get used to it. make sure you have low lighting and that she hasn't just finished exiting play (maybe look at books or something non-stimulating before the routine). It will take a week or so, but this will help. Also, make sure she is getting enough sleep during the day. When they get overtired, they will not sleep well at night. sounds weird, but so true!

Well, I sure hope I can help! I bet you have heard not to give any sugar....LOL An 11 month old! I sure hope not...Usually a nice hot bottle, after a nice hot/warm bath with Lavendar...They do have a babies formula by Huggies and I think Johnson & Johnson! This usually works! A nap eased in during the day....work up to it and by 9 p.m. Little miss prescious should fall asleep! PS Other "helps" music, with some rocking....My mother and grandmother use to make up little cute songs!

You can try all of the sleep routine stuff already mentioned but if it doesn't work, I'd give her Melatonin. Its a natrual sleep aid. I've researched it and asked our son's pediatrician and have been told that it is 100% safe to give to kids.

My son is 7 and we give it to him but I wish I'd have given it to him when he was a baby. You might consider researching it yourself and calling your own doctor first. It is in liquid form and taste sweet.

There are some kids who do not improve their sleep habits no matter what you do or what book you read but I do believe its worth trying.

V.

Hi S.!

You must be exhausted. I am curious what time your baby wakes up AFTER staying up that late.
I have a boy, now 5, that would (and still would) stay up as late as I would let him. In other words, if I never said that it was time for bed, then he would continue to play, and usually very happy. Then, there is my other son, that even now at age 11, as soon as that clock hits 8:30pm he puts himself to bed :0)
It sounds to me like you have to have/change your bedtime routine for this little one. Because whatever you're doing now, doesn't seem to be working for her.
I would countdown (as a verbal warning) when it's time for bed, starting a long 5 mintues. Always give yourself at least 30 minutes longer than you plan on for bedtime. If you want her in bed by 8:30, then start at 7:45. You might make your goal by then :0) If you aren't hitting the bedtime goal, then you can get frustrated, which can prolong EVERYTHING even longer. Been there!
When it's time for bed maybe let your 6 year "read" to her. By that, you're doing something for both of your girls.
I tried to be "all about love" back then, so I used to "rock" my boys until they were almost asleep, then sing made-up "time to lay down and go to bed" song. There were tears at first, mostly because the rocking FELT SO GOOD and they didn't want it to stop! But this was a short-term routine to help with a bedtime sleep pattern. It wasn't a perfect plan because they would fall asleep sometimes. But I was willing to do it, and take the easy/peaceful way out. It didn't ruin them, though, they sleep well now :0)

I'm sure that you can come up with a routine that works for you and your little girl. But it does sound like that's what you need. Having your daughter missing a nap, may not be the the best solution either.
I'm sure you are getting great ideas from Mamsource to help you.

Good luck!

I feel for you! My now four year old stayed up every night until 10 PM until he was 3. It's not as bad as your situation, but it was still very frustrating, especially because I stayed with him until the moment he fell asleep. I felt I had no control over my evenings, and by the time he went to bed, I felt frustrated and exhausted.

Everything changed when I learned to "sleep train" his younger brother, mainly based on the advice of "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby", as mentioned below, as well as techniques from Super Nanny. I realized that I could "train" my older son as well, and I did!

It was life changing! Now it's up to me, not them, when bedtime is. I do have a fairly consistent routine (dinner, bath, story time), so they are not surprised by anything. But again, the key is, I decide when to do this. When I tuck them in, whether they are ready or not, they are in bed, and I am free! And usually they are ready, because they are not overtired. Sometimes they will lay there or play for a while, but as long as I don't have to be there, it's okay with me.

Yes, getting over the hump, which involves letting the little one cry in their bed, is tough. Watch the video clip on the Super Nanny website, and you'll get the idea of how to overcome this. When I watched that clip on sleep training, I cried, because it reminded me of how life changing it was to get control over this situation.

Good luck, and let us know how it goes!

I really hope some of these suggestions work for you! I have a 23 month old son and he has ALWAYS stayed up until 3-4am and then doesn't wake up until noon-1pm. Mommy and daddy have always been night owls and my son was even only ever active in the womb in the middle of the night. I have tried EVERYTHING, he still takes a nap during the day and and no matter what time he takes his nap he wakes up and stays awake until 3-4am. I have tried keeping him up all day and this only made things worst because then he fell asleep about 10-11pm for his NAP, woke up and was up until 7am or so. I'm expecting a new baby in May and I don't know how i will ever adjust with a toddler that doesn't sleep till morning.

My daughter was just like this at 11 months! We had to institute a pretty regular bedtime routine. Dinner at 6:00, bath at 7:30, Bedtime at 8:30. We would go to bed together, and I would lie there with her in the dark, until the fell asleep. I soothed her, but I did NOT let her get out of bed. I won't lie, she was pretty resistant to it at first. She hollered and screamed and cried, but I was right there all the time with her, singing and soothing. We co-sleep, so I don't know how easy it will be for you to lie in a crib, but maybe a futon on the floor until she falls asleep? Anyhow, after 3 days, she actually started putting herself to bed, just about! How they love a routine! This is what worked for our family, though. You need to do what's best for yours!

I agree that your daughter is likely overtired. It's super important to give your daughter naps and to get her in bed at night at the very first signs of sleepiness (usually some eye rubbing or yawning). When a child is overtired, adrenalin kicks in and it's almost impossible to get your child to sleep. I hope this helps.
K.