31 answers

10 Month Old Cries All of the Time

I am at my wits end. My 10 month old son has been...let's say a very demanding child since birth. He's always cried a lot unless he's being held, and even then, he isn't always calm. He is a very healthy child except for the occasional cold during which his crying is incessant. I am a stay at home mother of two (I have a very vibrant and busy 2 1/2 year old daughter.) I used to be able to "shut it out" for a while and just let him cry while I got dressed and did a chore here and there. I'm not really the spoiling kind of mother who feels the need to hold him any time he makes a peep, though I do enjoy holding him and playing with him...I guess you could call me pretty balanced in that way. I just don't know what to do. Lately, it seems things are getting worse, and I find myself holding him more frequently out of self preservation...I know this is the usual time for separation anxiety, but I'm going out of my mind. I know kids are different, but my daughter was soooooooo easy compared to this. I should mention that my husband is often away for work for two weeks at at time. Do you think it's just my patience wearing thin? I know others have been here before...and I know many more of you have had more difficult situations. I guess I'm just looking for some "I've been there and survived." Help!

What can I do next?

Featured Answers

I have a 14 month old son that is also very demanding and vibrant! I would say buy a baby sling or a BabyBjorn and hold him all day! I worried that too much holding might become a problem but I believe this is what he is telling you he needs. I would also recommend the book "Attachment Parenting" by Dr. Sears. I hold my son constantly and he is still demanding but he is happy! Good luck!

My daughter is needy too. I use the Playtex hip hammock when I can't take any more. I also just let her cry like you said when I have chores or need to get dressed. Hang in there.

More Answers

Yes. My sone was exactly like this. You need a mom's day off, and you need to hire a sitter RIGHT NOW! Some kids are just needy like that, Jed was. There isn't anything wrong with him, it's just his personality.

However. It is this kind of frustration that cause's mothers to commit acts of violence against their kids when they snap. Get your mom or a friend or somebody who knows you and your kids to keep them for an afternoon and go do something "else". Read a book, go swimming or take a walk. Anything.

Then make a date of it. Do this once a week at least. It will give you time to refresh and take on the battle again. It is an emotional battle to be near a crying baby all the time.

God Bless you with peace!
R.

1 mom found this helpful

H.,

Have you had your little one checked out for ear infections. He may need tubes in his ears. A friend of mine said about the first year after their son was born he would scream and cry and throw tantrums many many times a day and even when they would give him their full attention he would still cry. She finally took him to have extensive tests ran and he needed tubes put in his ears. After they were put in, he never cried unless something was really wrong. Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

He could have an allergy to milk which makes him uncomfortable. I have a friend who figured this out when her baby was 18 mos. Another when her baby was 20 mos. They were both fussy babies.

1 mom found this helpful

H.,

First of all let me say "I have been there and I survived." You are correct that this is probably separation anxiety. There were times when I would call my husband crying because I could not do anything or leave the room without her crying. One thing that my husband and doctor suggested was to start playing peek-a-boo with her. Every time I would leave the room I would pop my head back around the corner and say "peek-a-boo." You can even do this without leaving the room. Start putting a blanket or pillow over your head and ask "where's mama." This eventually gave my daughter the assurance that I was still there and I was not going to leave her. I hope this helps because I know this was a very trying time but you will get through it.

Good luck!

A.

1 mom found this helpful

I know 10 months is a little old to be devolping acid reflux but i wouldn't rule it out.

1 mom found this helpful

Hi H.,

Been there, done that, don't want to do it again! My now 15 year old son was, as you so nicely put it, demanding. We adopted him at birth and we noticed his demanding, loud cry in the hospital nursery. Little did we know that this was his temperment.

Have you eliminated any health poblems, ie: ear infections, bowel problems, allergies, gas, etc.? That, in my opinion, is your first step. If all is normal health wise then all I can say is hang on for the ride and offer a few tips that helped us.

Here are some things that I did that helped calm our son down
* vanilla scented candles or fresheners
* soft classical music in the background
* soft, pastel colors in his room - avoid red at all costs
* low sugar diet
* prayer
* sing lullabyes to him
* rock him
* read children's books to him
* turn the washer on spin and place him in his carseat or bouncy on the top - the vibration will help calm him down
* they now make toys with the sound of the mother's heartbeat in it and I heard these are very successful - here's an address to one http://www.sassypup.net/Comfort-Pals-Puppy-Dog-Toy-hear-t...

Time will help some in his decreasing the level of his demanding. However, please know that if it's not a health issue and is his temperment you are in for a noisy ride. You can, however, survive sane and sound on the other side. Remember to take care of yourself also. If you aren't "healthy" emotionally, physicaly and psychologically then your journey will be harder.

From one mother of a demanding child to another...my thoughts and prayers are with you.

W. Q

1 mom found this helpful

Hang in there! My son was exactly the same way! My poor husband would come home from work at night, he worked about 70 hours a week but was home almost every night, and would take care of him while I would go get some groceries or something to get out of the house for a little while. That seemed to help me a lot. When I would return home, I would feed him (I was breastfeeding) and then he would conk out from all the crying while I was gone. We found out that he was having some ear problems when he was about 11 months old. He got tubes and he was a whole different child, though he did scare rather easily. The doctor said that was because he had not heard unmuffled sound before. The tubes came out rather quickly and he had to get another pair of tubes when he was about 18 months old and he has never looked back. He is a wonderful and very intelligent 6 year old boy today. I do hope this helps!

1 mom found this helpful

I completely understand what you are going through, my son did the same thing. Come to find out he had Reflux real bad which makes teething really bad which caused him to have chronic ear infections. His body wouldn't drain the fluid in his ears so we had to get tubes put in his ears, after that he was like a new baby. His reflux cleared up, once in a while he has problems with it, hasn't had any problems with his ears, and well teething is still very painful, but that's ok.

I would take your son to the Dr and see what is going on and make sure that everything is ok, it could be something simple like his ears, very fixable, or reflux, which is also very fixable.
Good luck, I hope you get some answers soon

1 mom found this helpful

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