1 Yr Old with All Day Mood Swings (HELP)

Updated on February 03, 2010
M.D. asks from Livermore, CA
14 answers

I dont know what to do. My 1 yr old son is always moody. He will be happy for 10 minutes then start whinning for any reason. This is not something new, he has been doing this for months now. He bangs his head on the floor, trys to hit me and throughs his head back alot. It is just really stressfull. His fits can last for a few minutes to 30 min and hell be happy then do it all over again. I feel like I'm loosing my mind. Any advice?

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S.C.

answers from San Francisco on

A good friend of mine, with a moody now 6 year old, gives him DHA. She does extensive research on everything she gives her kids and learned that it's good for keeping balanced as well as brain development. Might be worth a try.

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M.G.

answers from San Francisco on

Do not panic. Stay calm and observe & make notes on his behavior. How is he when he first gets up, does this progress through the day. This could be a combination of things, he could be allergic to his envornment and food,pollen,mold, mildew allergies. My son was and at 2 I was not going to put him on ritlin. Get rid of all toxic cleaning chemicals in your home including bleach and laundry soap. In food do not give him food with food coloring and perservatives. Read Allergies and the Hyperactive child to learn what to look for. I found a great company with natural products as soon as I concerted over to using them, the inprovement in my son was amazing, he eventually out grew all of this. If you want to know what I used send me an email
good luck

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J.M.

answers from Tucson on

Hi M.,
I believe your son may have autism and SID! Much of what you are describing here (in fact all) I relate too as I too have a child with autism and SID...he is 6 now! What peeked my interest here is the fact you said he is happy one moment and then is upset again without any apparent cause (anyway thats what i took from what you said) that is exactly what my son used to do...he wasnt doing it to get a piece of candy or for some other external reason. My son used to throw his head back and crack me in the nose, hit his head with his fists, bite himself, bite me, hit me etc. Typically children on the spectrum have severe sensory issues, specifically -SID or Sensory Integration Disorder (your son may be sensory seeking) it is very uncomfortable for the child as he feels disattached from his body...he may even feel numb and tingly all over which will cause him to be uncomfortable enough to tantrum. Sometimes the fits with our son would go on for hours and hours for no apparent reason. I know it is frustrating when he hits you and hurts himself, but understand that these chidren dont feel things as acutely as we do and don't feel pain as intensely -he is desperatly seeking stimulation to essentially "feel" his own body. I think too with my son he hits me because I am mom and I can't make it better. I know what it feels like to lose my mind I KNOW HOW FRUSTRATING THIS IS!!!! You are not alone!!!! I know this is allot to take in but I promise -with some work -he WILL get better! Please contact me whenever you need any advice, it is tricky getting a diagnosis for SID (and autism for that matter) as most doctors simply attribute these behaviors as JUST autism related behaviors...SID is in-fact attributed to autism but is a separate diagnosis . The first thing you should address is the sensory issues (before behavior therapy or ABA for autism) via an Occupational therapist who specializes in Sensory Integration...the key here is OT SI...best of luck hun :)

P.S. If you are unsure he has autism, here is some info: Autism is tricky because not two children are alike. despite what some of the books have probably told you about autism or symptoms of are misleading. My son for example is fairly social. He makes eye contact but for very brief periods of time like for a second or two. He looks at me often. he doesn't rock back and forth or flap his hands or stare at the floor! Some kids line up their toys in a row or spin the wheels on their cars or otherwise play with toys innappropriatly, however, my son did not. How many times do you have to call his name before he looks at you? Most kids (who don't have hearing problems) look at you the first time you call their name and look to see why you are calling their name (they show interest or undestand you have intent or a reason for calling their name and show some curiosity as to why). If you call his name and he looks at you briefly but shows little interest in why..that may be a sign! Does he point at objects he wants you to see..or does he point just because or not at all? Does he look where you are pointing? Does he seem interested in what you are doing or is he fairly quant just playing by himself? I realized something was wrong at 2 when I came to his preschool to have lunch with him and I began reading him a story, he ended up wondering off but all of the other children came over and were very interested in the book, meanwhile he was playing with some blocks in a corner by himself. I guess looking back I felt a disconnect somehow, I never thought autism initially, but he just didn't seem to engage with me as often or seem so interested in playing with me -the only exception was during physical activities like tickle games and so forth to which he was really engaged -other than that -not so much. Hope this helps

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A.M.

answers from San Francisco on

hello M.,

i am in Larkspur and my specialty is looking intuitively at babies and children (over the phone mostly but happy to see you in person) and giving parents a taped reading of what i see (including: physical/emotional/brain activity/spiritual purpose/soul contracts for learning/relationship agreements with family members/your questions). i am also a licensed MFT and work on a sliding scale.

blessings,
A.

K.B.

answers from Milwaukee on

.Talk to your pediatrician right away and if he/she does not specialize in behavioral situations ask for a recommendation, a good pediatrician will already have list of who they think is good.

Also arm yourself with everything you observe by keep a journal of your child or just writing down what you have told us and even in more detail if possible so you do not forget anything when talking to the pediatrician. If you have a video camera maybe take some videos so the pediatrician can see the activity for themselves because your son may not exhibit the same swings when at the doctor's.

It could be anything from being sensitive to certain foods (gluten, dairy), sounds, light or could be a type of autism... either way addressing it now with a professional will help your child because you will have to adjust what is fed, done, etc and you may seen some big changes in just a few weeks depending what it is. Something is going on because your child is trying to make know something is bothering him with his actions, and in this situation I think it is something that a professional will have to help get to the bottom of but once you get more information then hit the books and web and educate yourself on what is causing these actions from your son.

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R.W.

answers from San Francisco on

I agree to talk to the pediatrician. Don't freak out, you just need a professional evaluation, to put your mind at rest if nothing else!
Re: the autism theory---I have seen some of what you describe in autistic kids I've worked with, but that doesn't necessarily mean that is the problem. For example the head banging would come out of frustration in not being able to communicate desires or problems, which is very common for autistic kids (because it mainly a social/communication disorder), but high level frustration could occur without autism, and so can communication problems...like speech delays and language processing difficulty.
The journal is a good idea, and videotaping is also a good idea. This would be so that you have solid behavior patterns (evidence) to show a doctor, in case he doesn't do it when in front of the doctor.

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A.Y.

answers from Los Angeles on

I think you should talk to a good pediatrician about this. I don't know where you are, but in SO. CA we have a very good pediatrician who specializes in behavioral situations like Autism. This may be the problem, but you should really see the doc to rule out any other things that may just be frustrating your child. Make sure he doesn't have any infections, make sure his hearing and eyesight are normal, check to make sure he hasn't broken any bones that you weren't aware of by trying to climb and walk. That's a very rough age, when they can't tell you what is wrong, it could be any number of things. If he is able to babble at you, hug you and be held, then I would say it may be something other than autism-although Aspberger's Syndrome is a type of high-functioning autism, that could be it, but it is really very early to know.

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D.W.

answers from Indianapolis on

I agree with all the others - I'd have your pediatrician assess the situation and possibly refer out if necessary. Both of our kids started getting their independence around 19 months, but not to the level you've stated about your son.

Good luck! I hope you get some resolution soon!

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P.S.

answers from Fort Walton Beach on

I agree with the other answers..My nephew has the same problem..type of autism..but not..he has emotional overload. Sounds alot like what my sister has had to go thru with her son. Started when her son was 1..Was diagnosed by 2..Sooner you get him in to be tested the better. Can be helped..called sensory integration disorder. Senses are on overload.. Sounds hurt their ears...colors hurt their eyes..happy and sad are hard emotions to handle.

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J.J.

answers from San Francisco on

Sorry to hear about what you two are going through! I agree with some of the other advice. I'd try to keep him as busy as possible - lots of time outside, arts and crafts, anything to keep the day moving forward. Helping him communicate with sign language and predictablility in this schedule eases tension. If at all possible, getting some alone time for you to excercise or take a nap is a good idea. Hope this passing quickly!

M.F.

answers from San Francisco on

hello M.,
i am too in the same boat! my son is a pretty moody boy! he is happy, but my first son was so much happier and easier to deal with! they say all kids are different so maybe he's just different and it will pass! i don't know what kind of advice i can give you, but just to let you know that you're not alone! i don't think your son has any serious medical issues, but talking with your pediatricion will reassure you with this! my son when he wakes up from naps or wakes up in the morning if i'm not there, he's cranky and cries and even when i enter the room he's still cranky!! also during the day he just gets tired of being in one spot for a long time! do you give him room to explore? my lil one doesn't walk yet but he crawls everywhere, and when he's free, he's happy!! he's only cranky and wants to be picked up when he's tired or hungry! sometimes i just don't have time to watch him while he's crawling so i put him in his walker or highchair and that's when he gets kinda mad, but i have to do other things like laundry, dishes, cook, vacuum...etc. i'm a stay at home mom, so my day is full w/ taking care of 2 kids and house chores! anyways, i hope this helps somehow, i see that you've gotten lots of great advice already! if you need someone to vent to about your lil guy feel free to message me!! =) take care and lets pray this will pass soon, for the both of us!! lol

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J.J.

answers from San Francisco on

Always be sure to talk to your pediatrician when you are having problems like this, just in case, but parent to parent I will tell you that my now 9 year old daughter was also very tempermental as a baby. I thought I was going insane and as I'd never seen a kid like this I was sure something was wrong. My pediatrician insisted she was on the normal scale. Small comfort in the midst of a crazy tantrum that could start anywhere and for any reason and could bring me close to a tantrum myself if not a nervous breakdown. Barring any medical issues, we discovered that she was easily frustrated and as a small baby especially had no understanding of control or ability to reason. It started when she wanted to get down and move before she was able and progressed from there. As challenging as her behavior was and can still be, she was really happy at other times. I worried that she was schizophrenic or bi-polar becuase of the extreme mood swings and i learned to protect myself from flailing body parts, butting heads and choke hold hugs. Kaiser offers temperment training which is really helpful in understanding your child's and your own temperment and learning effective ways of communication. I will say that my 9 year old is still incredibly challenging, but is also very highly performing in life and school. I think that kids who are smart take in all of the things that they are surrounded by and have very little filters to help them deal with the information bombarding them and this leads to some extreme behavior. Good luck.

C.C.

answers from Fresno on

Some babies are just plain difficult. My older daughter, who is now the most charming 7 year old you'll ever meet, was a nightmare when she was a baby! Huge tantrums, which started when she was under a year old, happened for no reason that I could tell. She was not a good sleeper (we got suckered into attachment parenting, which was the wrooooong move for us). So I think her screwed up eating and sleeping patterns contributed big time. If you feel like that might be the case, check out Babywise. We used that for our 2nd child and we had none of the sleep/eat issues, and she was always so happy.

The other thing that helped was when my older daughter went to preschool at age 2. As I said, we'd been dutifully doing the AP thing, and what she really wanted and needed was for us to back off and let her be independent. Not all kids are that way, but our daughter was. She got out into the world and it was like she grew wings! What a difference in her personality, almost overnight. Now she is a natural leader among her peers, and a very responsible and helpful child. When I look back, I can see that these same personality traits would make life extremely frustrating for a toddler. Toddlers can't communicate very well, we're always telling them what to do, their little bodies aren't coordinated enough to do what they want to do. That's very frustrating for a take-charge kid! Hence the near-constant meltdowns.

So I really just wanted to tell you that there are many perfectly bright, normal kids out there who were difficult babies. And almost always, it's a phase. Take heart, it won't last forever.

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S.H.

answers from Cincinnati on

First off, I would ask, does he take good naps and is he getting enough sleep at night. The average 1 year old should be getting about 12 hours at night and probably still take 2 naps a day from 1-2 hours each depending on the child. Is he on a good sleep routine? Overtired kids may have a lot of problems. I recommend a book called "Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child". If he does get plenty of good sleep then I don't know what to tell you except to try distracting him when he starts an undesirable behavior and make sure he's eating a well balanced diet. Hopefully, it's just a stage. Good luck!

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