1 Year Old Throwing Tantrums (On the Floor!)

Updated on October 13, 2008
P.A. asks from Thousand Oaks, CA
6 answers

My 16 month old daughter has recently started throwing tantrums. She will throw herself on the floor and whale her arms. She doesn't really use her voice, but her body language gets her point across. I have recently gone back to school and added an extra day at work. (i am still home with her full time 5 days a week) i make sure to spend all my spare time with her, i just don't know if that contributes or if it is just the age. Also how do we deal with it? My husband thinks we need to work it out with her and let her know this behavior is bad, but me i feel let her get it out of her system and then deal with it. Is there a happy medium?

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H.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Every kid has a go at the tantrums :)

My solution ( at any age) I have five ranging from1 to 15 years old. is to mimick them when they are being kuku. so throw your self on the floor, stomp, whine pout ect. your child will notice very quickly that that looks ridiculous...and will either laugh or get angry. anger is better than despair...but you have their attention now put it on something creative or productive. get her to place something in the trash, pick up a toy or notice a painting on the wall... this is the only way I know that gets your little person back in present time, able to correct their actions. no amount of ignoring, yelling or comforting restores their being.

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T.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

http://www.awareparenting.com/articles.htm
Aletha Solter's articles are great... especially the one about Understanding Tears & Tantrums. If you are near Santa Barbara, she is giving her next FREE workshop on 10/24.

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A.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I would consider what kind of behavior you want in public. I train my kids based on that. I wouldn't want my children doing that at the store, my mom's, or my friends house. So I would definitely stop it right now.

You could do time out, hold her hand and be firm and say do yelling. Be creative. :)

Good luck and I hope things get better.

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J.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi P.:
At 16 months old, She is at that stage,where she is experiencing a whole different world of emotions.She is just frustrated, when she is unable to convey to you WHAT those emotions are, so she resorts to tantrums.Its so benificial,if we can imagine ourselves in our toddlers position.Imagine if you will,being mute.or unable to speak.You try desperately to tell someone what you want,but they can't understand you! I don't know about you, but it would drive me crazy! I'd get so frustrated,and angry! Not so much at that person, i was unable to relate to but at my perdicument. This is when you begin showing her how to communicate. Show her how to point,or sign what she wants. Use one word to help her explain what it is she wants or what it is troubling her. While shes throwing her tantrum,theres not much you can do to get through,so let her get tired of kicking and screaming first,and then (calmly) tell her you want to help her,and you want to understand what she wants,but she needs to be a big girl and try and tell mommy. Ask her to show you,or point,then give it a name for her.Since your daughter already has a cute sense of humor,you can even show her the comical side of her tantrums,after all has calmed down.Punishment for her effort in attempting to communicate,or simply because she gets frustrated,are unfounded.Your patience and understanding during this stage,will be far more benificial to you and your daughter. I wish you and your funny girl the best.

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D.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

ALWAYS walk away from tantrums where they do that (make sure they aren't going to hurt themselves). It's an attention getter. Find out why he's starting the tantrum and if all needs are met, then walk away from it. He'll learn it's not going to get the attention from this behavior. Good luck!

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M.B.

answers from Los Angeles on

My 17 month old did that to me today. She totally had a fit. I felt so bad because I know that she just couldn't tell me what she wanted. I just got on the floor with her and told her that I want to help her, but I didn't understand what she wanted.
She just cried and fell to the floor. I finally got her out of the funk when I turned on Barney and started singing the song they were dancing to.
She can usually comunicate fairly well. She has a ton of words that she says, and I will have her point to what she wants or bring me to what she needs.
I have been lucky that she has not done this to me in public.....yet.
Punishment is definatly not the way to go. She frustrated, and can't communicate properly. It's only punishable if they are purposely being defiante. And I don't believe at that age, they are doing that. At least I know my baby isn't doing it on purpose. She just gets mad because she can't make me understand what she wants.
Be pacient, she will grow out of it eventually. Or it will get better when she can talk.
Good luck.
Sometimes I just think its the cutest thing when my daughter get mad. I just try to hug her...even when she pushes me away. I usually get my hug after a few minutes.

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